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Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 76
No sex from get go so no goPage 6 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
A guy knows within 2 seconds of meeting you if he wants to have sex with you or not. So technically he is already waiting, so the question actually is why aren't guys willing to wait longer. And the answer is why would we want to wait? If a girl doesn't want to have sex i simply assume she must not like me and move on. Frankly if you haven't decided in two-three dates if you like someone enough to sleep with them at that point you are not trying to decide if you like them or not but you are actually wanting them to prove something to you by waiting. Which is a silly and downright antiquated notion. You most certainly should not have sex with anyone you don't want too, but stop pretending you need months to decide if you like someone enough for sex.
Joined: 5/7/2012
Msg: 81
No sex from get go so no go
Posted: 6/7/2012 5:28:48 PM

I guess that having NSA "a little fun on the side" is the key to being honest and making a 12 year marriage work.

Relationships take many forms apart from the exclusively monogamous kind.

The poster in question has an open marriage and that's way more honest than sneaking around and carrying on an affair behind the other's back.

So yes, her 12 year marriage works because they are honest with each other.
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 87
No sex from get go so no go
Posted: 6/8/2012 9:24:44 AM
I think women know within the first 2 seconds whether the guy's physical attributes appeal to them as well - guys don't hold some miraculous ability there, some just think they do. The difference is, I suppose, that most people would like to know if there's anything past the physical appeal, rather than "just" the physical appeal. Some take longer to determine whether or not the other person is one who they'd sooner tell to get lost after the sexual encounter and would like to judge that prior to the sexual encounter - it just kinda makes sense and it's just crappy that not everyone's timing is the same that way. For the guys that figure they can tell that within 2 seconds everything there is to like or dislike about a woman, they wouldn't be humping and dumping with regularity because they'd have, with that miraculous ability they seem to think they have, stayed with the person because they knew more about them than "I'd like to get me some of that". It's like some people who guzzle booze to get drunk, without even caring much one way or the other for the taste of what it is they're drinking...some people like to have sex with someone (anyone), without knowing the person AT ALL.
Joined: 5/7/2012
Msg: 93
No sex from get go so no go
Posted: 6/10/2012 10:33:02 PM

Undertheradar is boasting about a 12 yr marriage while looking for someone on the side and posting on forums. Not my idea of a great union. I'm just sayin'.....

Bit of a cheap shot... just sayin'

I and several others happen to think the poster you are slagging-off at has a pretty honest and strong union. She was hardly boasting about her lifestyle and was merely pointing out what works in her relationship.

Pretty much summed up by this poster:

A gazzillion men and women out there, married or not, cheating on each other, sneaking around, and lying, and we have to pick on the one person who DOESN'T lie when having relations with someone other than their spouse?

Arg. Just wonderful.
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 94
No sex from get go so no go
Posted: 6/10/2012 10:41:04 PM
The only way I could see the guy not wanting JUST sex, would be if in all the time you guys spend together & communicate, you come off as if you're not that into him... and he'd be immature to go that route to try and have sex to solidify things with you. Just like some women have sex "too early" to validate or hook in a guy's interest, a guy can do the same thing with someone he's ga-ga about but feels she isn't that interested in him. I'm not defending that angle for either gender to play! Just pointing out a possibility...

... but if you have shown/expressed true solid interest that doesn't require reading between the lines AT ALL, but flowing pretty solidly, then yeah, he's just horny and impatient... and there's a good chance his main focal point is just on sex.
Joined: 6/17/2011
Msg: 95
No sex from get go so no go
Posted: 6/10/2012 11:57:40 PM
I had sex with my first husband on the second date--now I knew him for months from work before the date and the first night I met my second husband face to face (we met online in 97 and talked for 6 weeks before we met).

Yall are making sex sound like a bad thing, and while there is more to life than sex I simply cant think of a better thing to do with a man that I care about and want to build a relationship with--

If you are not physically wanting this man to be with you then cut him loose and let him find someone that does find him attractive and DESIRES him--why is it wrong for a man to want a woman to desire him? Not saying you have to act on it but you should at least want him!
Joined: 12/17/2011
Msg: 99
No sex from get go so no go
Posted: 6/11/2012 5:50:56 AM
It happened the me the first date.He said that majority of men at the site dates and spends money for women on the site for free sex and they thought this is the site for free sex. Men looked down at women on the site coz they believe we are selling our selves in public. They said they talk to each other and find it interesting that with just a simple dinner or coffee they can have a freebie.Thats the reason why men cant find good women. They complain about good women getting scarce but the thing is when they get into the dating site, they have a different agenda, And guess what , if you give in maybe after awhile he will dump you and find another one.....Not all women needs to feed its biological needs. I can not even kiss a guy if I dont love should understand that...

Just get him out of your list...he does not deserve good woman like you....
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 102
No sex from get go so no go
Posted: 6/11/2012 11:54:40 AM

And guess what , if you give in maybe after awhile he will dump you and find another one.....Not all women needs to feed its biological needs. I can not even kiss a guy if I dont love should understand that...

Guess what people get dumped after a short time or long time. Better stop dating and go be a hermit or a cat lady, because someone might dump you sometime in the future.

Then we move on to, 'you can't kiss a man unless you love him'. Don't you see how 'nutters' that sounds? Your post makes you sound like you have more issues than Time magazine.

Now moving on to this............


He is off my list and I said he tried to communicate via text with me I didn't say that I texed him back just making that clear.

So you haven't told him it's over, you're just going to run and hide from him. Pull up your big girl panties and tell him it's over. Other wise karma can come back and treat you the way you treat others.
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