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 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 27
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Dating while pregnantPage 3 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
I don't think you should have sex with other men while pregnant. Forgetting about how cold hearted it sounds, and it does, I think while you are pregnant you need to be very careful about STDs. Right now the baby should come first, especially it's health. It would seem that you and the baby's bio dad weren't close, so if that's the case you might be lonely and wanting male contact but being pregnant is a big deal and that should be your priority. You should also watch out for men with pregnant-body fetish, unless you like that sort of thing, don't assume you will be building a relationship during this time, so be careful with your body and your emotions. Being pregnant is a roller coaster ride of emotions.

I am sorry about your loss.
 sddude
Joined: 12/9/2007
Msg: 28
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Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/22/2012 2:23:41 PM
She stated in one of her posts that she is not looking for sex.
Not all men, like you say, dates a pregnant woman to take advantage of them, it is usually the other way around I know, ...multiple times.
 jleeannexo
Joined: 5/28/2011
Msg: 31
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/22/2012 3:44:58 PM
Dreamer, Thank you for being honest and nice! All these other people are making me feel like trash. I don't know how many times I've stated I don't want sex! I guess some people pick and choose what they want to see! I don't even know how to respond to half the other stuff on here.. I guess it was a mistake for posting and I probably will never post on a forum again. But thank you for being kind!!!
 jleeannexo
Joined: 5/28/2011
Msg: 32
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/22/2012 3:46:28 PM
Thanks to you as well! I cannot believe some of the name calling and just udder rudeness coming out of some peoples mouths.. Well fingertips.. Bet they wouldn't say it to my face : /
 wanderer1999
Joined: 2/10/2007
Msg: 33
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Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/22/2012 3:49:39 PM
Don't ever let other people make you feel like any less of a human being.

Only you know what you're going through. Keep in mind, these are public forums so you're going to get opinions from every part of the spectrum, so don't be surprised if you encounter opposing and occassionally offensive opinions.

Take them all in, try to understand their perspectives and points of view, then focus on what rings true to you.

In the end, these are decisions only you can make, and you are the one that will have to deal with what comes from those decisions.

Best of luck.
 jleeannexo
Joined: 5/28/2011
Msg: 34
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/22/2012 3:53:51 PM
No no no no and no. Random men are absolutely in no way in and out of my life!!!! I havn't even had guy friends over around my daughter... I am NOT an idiot. And like I previously stated my daughter is my top and only priority. I would NEVER in a million years bring random men in and out of her life! Who do you think I am some kind of whore out on the corner? No... You know the saying about assumption...
 jleeannexo
Joined: 5/28/2011
Msg: 35
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/22/2012 4:10:29 PM
Thank you! This was not my daughters father. He however is still in her life and hes great! We get along no drama there.. We share joint custody! I wasn't with my deceased boyfriend but for a few months. But it doesn't mean I didn't love him I did. He was a wonderful man who's life was cut short! Knowing the type of person he was he would have encouraged me and if something made me happy then I should go ahead and do it! Im sure he's frowning at all these punks in heaven!
 Mr_Nonchalance
Joined: 6/21/2011
Msg: 36
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Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/22/2012 5:05:22 PM
i dont blame the op atleast she is being honest about wanting to do it.you have people who wont date not because they dont want to,but it is something that is frowned on in society and they dont want people reacting like how people are in this forum judging them.i spoke about this with alot of my ex's and i would rather them go out and find love than morning for me,i dont think they would actually go through with it, but i wont want them dwelling on it being unhappy.

Now to be honest no regular dude is going to want to date a pregant women,its just weird point blank.After you have the baby you would have better chances.If you tell a dude your sitution i dont think your going to find a guy to take you serious,maybe they would sleep with you but nothing more than that.guys are going to think if this girl can move on this fast after having her ex die,she must not lose any sleep finding a new guy and dont take relationships serious so they wont feel gulity not taking you serious.
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 39
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Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/23/2012 7:12:41 AM
Honey, you sound like a pretty level headed lady. You will potentially run into people who wish to take advantage of you and who are just ew. You could also wind up meeting someone that is really nice. I just found a friend on fb recently that I lost track of for 25+ years. She was pregnant when she met her husband, they have two more children and are still married.

I think dating while pregnant is probably a bigger crap shoot than it ordinarily is. My friend met him because he worked at her bank and perhaps that is a difference for you, meeting someone as you are walking through your life versus the potentially questionable people you might meet here.

Be careful and cautious.
 nubeginnings64
Joined: 4/8/2012
Msg: 41
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/23/2012 7:28:28 AM
No guy will take a pregnant women seriously, 2 months after her BF died, for anything more than a f*ck toy. When your maturity level equals that of a doorknob a mom is the last thing your capable of. Do that baby a favor & put it up for adoption.
 scifichicky
Joined: 2/12/2012
Msg: 42
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/23/2012 8:02:29 AM
Well, there is an Aussie in the forums that just posted that he is LOOKING to date a pregnant woman... so go figure!
 Jason022679
Joined: 1/8/2011
Msg: 43
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/23/2012 5:16:55 PM
Mental health providers actually state that until the child turns 18 you should not date. I understand the "mom" has the right to be happy but remember the only thing that matters now is your child and his/her well being. In other words, 100% of your time should be devoted to your child not on bringing different men in and out of their lives so you can be happy. You made the decision to have a child, now do the right thing and make them the priority not yourself.
 scifichicky
Joined: 2/12/2012
Msg: 44
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/23/2012 5:19:50 PM
^^^ Fine well and good, but I'M not waiting another 4-5 years to go on a date again.
 Jason022679
Joined: 1/8/2011
Msg: 45
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/23/2012 5:24:46 PM
Most women don't because it's the child that suffers not them...according to mental health providers.
 Bazinga_42
Joined: 1/10/2012
Msg: 46
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/23/2012 5:25:26 PM
I only date pregnant women. 9 months of bliss for me every time. Oh man did I just say that out loud?

But seriously you may want to take time away from dating and just focus on your child and pregnancy. I would definitely wait.
 Lilygnat
Joined: 6/1/2012
Msg: 47
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/23/2012 7:27:08 PM
Well, I'm pregnant and dating. It's different, for sure, and I didn't go looking for the guy.

I met my current boyfriend before I was pregnant and while I was dating my baby's father. We became good friends and he started asking me out. By the time my baby's dad and I figured out we couldn't be in a relationship (he then left the picture altogether), I had really fallen for him and agreed to date him. He knows the situation fully and we talk about it openly. He's a keeper in my mind for loving me through all of this.

As far as actively searching for a date goes - you are welcome to it, but be aware that the sort of man you are looking for may be too uncomfortable with the situation to date you until the baby is born. So you might find a better quality of guy after the baby is born.
 BillyMcCool
Joined: 12/5/2008
Msg: 49
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/23/2012 10:22:15 PM
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.... SERIOUSLY WAIT.. Don't be a skank, you think the poor kid really wants a****up there, give the kid a break.
 cherryking
Joined: 3/4/2008
Msg: 50
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Dating while pregnant
Posted: 6/26/2012 12:13:32 PM
There's nothing wrong with dating if you can find someone who is suiting to your needs, though it might be a little unlikely considering the circumstances.
I dont see why you really need to date anyone though, If you want emotional support etc, im sure you can talk to friends or family. You said you would always put your children first, which is great, then why dont you consider staying a single mom. it is a choice, there are many mothers out there that PREFER to be a single mom, they can focus all their attention on their children and not be burdened by relationship issues and conflicts in how to raise your child. and then there are of course mothers who are so broken they can't properly raise children. it's all a matter of how you view things. you do not need a significant other in your life if you have yours together.
 sprtrker2987
Joined: 10/11/2014
Msg: 52
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 11/29/2014 10:32:35 AM
I think maybe move on.. maybe start slow tho : )
 Perspektiv
Joined: 10/23/2014
Msg: 53
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 12/7/2014 4:55:05 AM
Sorry about your loss.

I think personally, that you should wait until the baby is born. Get your feet on solid ground first, and forget what anyone else feels about you from then on--follow your heart.

I think right now, you'd be dating for all the wrong reasons, and as a result, you're bound to pick bad partners as a result, to try to fill a void.

Have the child, and your priorities will all change, and you'll likely have a better mind frame, to boot.

I hate to say it, but any man who's more than happy to date a pregnant woman, *likely* isn't thinking of the best intentions, towards you.
 Eternityboresme
Joined: 8/20/2014
Msg: 54
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 12/7/2014 7:21:09 AM
^^your intentions are kindly, indeed. Maybe some of it is right.

I don't agree that men, in general, will date her for the wrong reasons. Surely, there are people who'll take advantage of her situation and her emotional vulnerability on top of it, but I don't think she should give up on wanting a shared life with somebody. That is, if she has a whole lot of self love and has her life, together. Being pregnant isn't an automatical stamp of disapproval, and it isn't the women's situation that has to be shamed nor hidden; she can freely date and enjoy her life. (I've a friend who dated while she was pregnant, found a responsible and caring man, they got married, and he adopted her resultant child and other children sprung from the marriage.)
 wooweewoo13
Joined: 7/7/2013
Msg: 55
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 12/9/2014 3:50:03 AM
Without any dumb comments as Im seeing......prob aughta wait and see where your life goes.....with any responsible parent usually you dont have time in the begining with a baby...specially if your jockying a job and all.....after your times divided you might be able to find someone if thats your desire....good luck!
 pilot22f15
Joined: 9/8/2011
Msg: 56
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Dating while pregnant
Posted: 10/31/2015 8:09:22 AM
yes i think it is sexy and it is like if it is your own baby.
 ClooneysTutor
Joined: 10/14/2015
Msg: 57
Dating while pregnant
Posted: 10/31/2015 9:09:10 AM
I'd have to be sure not to be present at the birth.

Some interesting laws out there.
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