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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Regrets when choosing a partner...?      Home login  
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 2
Regrets when choosing a partner...?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
I just got out of a relationship that for the last 5 we broke up and got together again about 4 times. Still I do not regret it one bit. She went through breast Cancer, had two small children, and then was diagnosed with being bipolar. I leaned a lot about humility, about kids, about suffering, about giving all you got, about pain. I am so happy it's over, but I don't regret it one bit.
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 3
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Regrets when choosing a partner...?
Posted: 6/22/2012 1:15:44 PM
Yes, I have deep, painful regrets about the two men I married and had children with. My children deserved a millions times better than my choices, my actions and their fathers. Too bad I couldn't see how important it is who you pick to procreate with, when I was doing so. I owe my kids so much for the mistakes I made at their expense. And of course their fathers are only half the problem, I am 100% responsible for the things I did wrong to my children. I don't want to give the impression that I was some saint married to two jerks, we were all three total jerks. I regret it more than I can ever express.
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 4
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Regrets when choosing a partner...?
Posted: 6/22/2012 1:29:36 PM
This sounds like the old "I fear the grass will appear greener over there, once I put down roots over here" thing. As in, the OP fears before he even starts that if he does get lucky with dream gal #a, that as soon as he gets involved, he'll wish he would have tried harder to get gal #b, or even as-yet-unseen gal #c.

My answer is yes, I am familiar with this fear, everyone has it to one degree or another (including those who claim otherwise), but no, when I have been involved with another, I have not wished I could go back and choose again.

I especially and avowedly learned long ago, that while one dithers and worries that another 'right one' might be about to show up, that all of the wonderful 'pretty damn wonderful' ones will move on and leave you with your daydreams.

I suggest you thrust the imaginary women out of your mind, and admonish yourself strongly to realize that NONE of the people in your head actually exist. Only the live one in front of you does. Appreciate her, or walk away and accept that you are alone.
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 5
Regrets when choosing a partner...?
Posted: 6/22/2012 6:33:34 PM

However, I might regret not having tried a bit harder to win-over some of the others...

At your age, you should know that you can try and try and try harder, but that doesn't mean a woman will respond to your overtures. We DO have freewill. It might not be a matter of your trying harder, but that some women just aren't interested.

Choice is never on the part of ONE person in a relationship, not unless it is a forced marriage, and even then, there are choices.

and would *JUMP* at the chance to start an LTR with ANY of them

Therein is the rub, eh? They would have to give you the chance. Why haven't they?
Joined: 6/10/2012
Msg: 6
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Regrets when choosing a partner...?
Posted: 6/23/2012 7:25:59 AM
Actually...a combination of several responses...
I Have written to some on my list...and just waiting for a reply...
Some are there because of their hopes that they will notice me...eventually...
And a couple I just couldn't resist adding...cause they're Just Plain Gorgeous , but haven't visited in Months...
(Yeah....probably fakes or male truckers...I know!!)
Just ~Hoping!~
I realize that keeping a 'list' is like having a Hope Chest....and to ~some~, it's even Creepy...
....Opinions Vary....
I Regretted my last relationship...because our personality and attitude differences Clashed instead of Meshed...
I hope to do time..!!

Thanx, all..!!
Joined: 1/8/2011
Msg: 7
Regrets when choosing a partner...?
Posted: 6/23/2012 5:42:33 PM
No regrets, but if I did have regrets it's my fault for picking them.
Joined: 6/10/2012
Msg: 8
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Regrets when choosing a partner...?
Posted: 2/24/2013 2:00:26 PM
I would only regret taking So Bloody Long to find her!!
~ 14 years is a H3LL of a long time...Alone!! ~

I would hope that she'll write my ~ Bon Voyage ~ profile update...!!
...since My return will be delayed...a L O N G Time!!!
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