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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Long List of Requirements met in order to message      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Eternitygracesme
Joined: 5/18/2015
Msg: 88
Long List of Requirements met in order to messagePage 5 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

Some, however will take offense to your restrictions, and feel slighted that you won't give us the opportunity to present ourselves to you. It's just a cold, streamlining process that un-clutters your life. But it has all the appearance of old time segregation, the "whites only" or "colored to the back of the bus" signs. A few will make their disapproval known, in which case, they get labeled as whiners. It's just a downside of OLD.


Relationships -- especially intimate relationships -- are very, VERY personal situations, in which people can be and should be (or not) be as selective as they wish. Whomesoever I choose to be in my life, sharing my space, in my body is my decision and my right, as are the processes that lead up to that decision, including precluding and including anybody who is/isn't preferred.

Dating is not an equal-opportunity, opportunity; and I resent being referred to being as "cold and unfair," discarding of anybody without merit, because I don't select you (I'm writing you generically and not specifically). Sex is a gift and not my obligation to give anybody.

To compare this to segregation is ludicrous (I don't think you have any idea what real racism and segregation entails).It's like me whining that men should overlook the fact that I'm middle-aged, overweight, no car, and a mother (things that some men don't want in a prospect). Sure, I don't want discrimination where it concerns my job, my rights, my housing, bodily autonomy, safety, and integrity, reproductive choices, et al -- but not a romantic relationship.

Albeit, I do have a level of dating privilege and by geographic location I have more opportunities (and more competition, as well); this doesn't mean I'm free from some of the many challenges of preferences that are presented -- and it's ok. I'm a very specific woman for a very specific man -- not men.

And yes, it's whining when people demand the affectionate of another, expecting them to overlook their own circumstances that lead to their choice, just to abate loneliness and sexual frustration.
 Eternitygracesme
Joined: 5/18/2015
Msg: 89
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/1/2015 3:58:10 AM
Quite frankly, I don't care who is offended by my preferences; they do nothing to subjugate or oppress the people whom are offended. What I find most offensive is not somebody's preferences, but that they can behold their preferences whilst I should surrender mine at the risk of appearing conceited and whorish.
 clooneystutor
Joined: 3/8/2015
Msg: 90
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/1/2015 5:04:53 AM
Oppression, surrendering, subjugating.....

We've got the an excerpt from that E. L. James novel.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 91
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/1/2015 8:01:49 AM

Quite frankly, I don't care who is offended by my preferences; they do nothing to subjugate or oppress the people whom are offended.


I wouldn't necessarily be offended it. If someone has a long list of rigid requirements, I would simply move on the next profile. Even when I actually matched the requirements.
 Baalratn
Joined: 12/8/2014
Msg: 92
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/1/2015 10:10:26 PM
I'm merely looking for a supermodel with an IQ of 150+ with no emotional problems who is really turned on by hairy overweight middle-aged men that live within 5 miles of me.

How can I set it to that?
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 93
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/1/2015 10:33:09 PM
increase your wealth level? :)

if someone has a bunch of requirements that limit me from meeting them, why do I want to meet them? tbey aren't a good fit for me, they seek someone who isn't me.

oh, that's right. I want to use them for sex, and aren't worried they are a personality mis-match for me. so I guess I have requirements, too, that keeps people who are a great fit for me but look like a friend from dating me.
 MaleFeasance
Joined: 3/13/2015
Msg: 94
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/2/2015 1:00:53 AM
I went to college because I wanted to learn.
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Since you apparently did not learn that going to school and becoming educated are not the same thing, you should go try again. Since I have more degrees than you do, I am at least as qualified as you to judge what college and education have in common and even more qualified given your equivocation of a degree with an education.

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Relationships -- especially intimate relationships -- are very, VERY personal situations, in which people can be and should be (or not) be as selective as they wish.
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Sure. Everyone should be selective. However, using misguided criteria which are not suited to select for the traits one uses them for, is just plain stupid, especially when one is complaining about the lack of suitable people to date.

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Whomesoever I choose to be in my life, sharing my space, in my body is my decision and my right, as are the processes that lead up to that decision...
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Everyone has the right to be stupid as well.
 2ufo
Joined: 2/28/2015
Msg: 95
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/2/2015 5:56:17 AM
I went to college because I enjoy learning and debating various aspects of what I have learned with people who have similar learning but have different opinions.

Still, I think we're putting too much emphasis on meeting and dating while the subject refers to a list of requirements in order to message.

I probably won't have any criteria for messaging but I will probably automatically block anyone who does not provide anything of interest in his message or profile or is not referring to a forum post simply because life is too short. I don't think people should take being blocked personally because it isn't meant as an insult in many cases, merely a confession of there aren't enough hours in a day to deal with everyone and everything.
 SLAFFA
Joined: 8/13/2007
Msg: 96
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/2/2015 8:53:43 AM
Golly, I'm starting to worry if I am the ONLY person who waters here that has no idea of all this Blocking business. I doubt if I would know if I WAS blocked. I should be glad that it's not listed in our profile somewhere as to how many people we have blocked? Does NONuse of that feature make me less dateable?

Apparently Big Fish does not [as yet] consider it important enough to be at the top of our profiles but has included it as a site feature. Obviously, it's a useful tool to many. Makes me wonder if other sites, Free or not offer something similar?
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 97
view profile
History
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/2/2015 4:45:23 PM

eternitygracesme wrote:

Why would I complain about any alleged lack of contact? if somebody wants to contact me, it's their decision to make? I take full responsibilities for my decisions and preferences. If I'm not receiving contact, I'll make the sincere changes in my profile and approach.


You have no cause to complain. You can afford to be selective. Some of us, can't. BTW, I notice you changed your handle. According to your new handle, you'd likely love the continuum....... ;-)
 Luz1147
Joined: 5/13/2015
Msg: 98
Long List of Requirements met in order to message
Posted: 6/2/2015 5:46:28 PM
I can relate to the age requirement because I have one. Here is some insight on it from my perspective. My age restriction says 29+ but my actual, true, preference is closer to 35+ Putting 29+ is already a stretch for me and it's my way of being open minded and flexible. I'm just not into guys who are younger than me. I've always been that way. I'm attracted to the masculinity of older men. So, instead of being rude and ignoring all the younger guys who message me, I put the restriction instead.
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