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 kate08690
Joined: 8/11/2016
Msg: 170
For the guys: Do girls message you first?Page 8 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
I've messaged maybe 10 guys first, most of them didn't reply. I think 2 added me to their favorites and I messaged them, only one replied, in the end I Wish he never responded. One viewed my profile and didn't message me, I found him attractive and messaged him.....I'm not good enough for you? He replied and we sent about 20-30 messages back and forth but he stopped replying so that was that.

I will say I was quite surprised not to hear back from some of them, thought to myself wtf does he think he is, then I thought OMG all the men who took a chance to write me (which is pretty high IMO) must be thinking....wtf does she think she is....hehe

So from my experience I don't plan to message men, I hate to sit back and wait for him to find me but I just know I'm not for everyone and I see so many complaints on here that the only chicks that write them are the fat girls, so I'll be one less fat girl sending unwanted messages :D
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 171
For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/12/2016 6:23:59 PM

I will say I was quite surprised not to hear back from some of them, thought to myself wtf does he think he is, then I thought OMG all the men who took a chance to write me (which is pretty high IMO) must be thinking....wtf does she think she is....hehe


See what happens when you walk a mile in someone else's shoes?
 Scaretale
Joined: 1/9/2016
Msg: 172
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 7:50:41 AM
I probably get 1 - 2 girls messaging me a week.

Pictures count for a lot, but so does the actual profile words - it is a glimpse into who you are.

If you stand out, and come across as someone trusting, honest, fun, and genuine...you're going to get action online...unless your pictures are just horrible.

From my experience, after the age of 30, a lot of girls change their priorities. They move appearance down from #1. Security, fun, and building a future together counts for a lot more.

If you are boring and blend into the sea of endless profiles...you're not going to get much attention. You must stand out.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 174
For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 11:36:12 AM

I think most people use looks as an excuse for their failure tbh


Is that because women have really been looking for "short, light, and ugly" all this time, and NOT "tall, dark, and handsome"?


If you are boring and blend into the sea of endless profiles...you're not going to get much attention. You must stand out.


If 99% of the profiles on a dating site have a picture, wouldn't a profile WITHOUT a picture stand out in the endless sea of pictures?
 JS3344
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 175
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 1:47:46 PM
my favorite message sequence ever;
She messaged me....."I like you!"
I checked her profile and wrote back "and I like you!"
her next message, her phone number
I called her right away, and as soon as I heard her voice I knew it was on. Met her the next day at the sushi bar, as I
walked in, she was at the bar, and 1000 times more beautiful than her pics......massive makeout sesh in the parking
lot, and sex on the 4th date, ya get lucky sometimes.
If I send a message my return rate is less than 1%, its always been that way.......so do what you gotta do to set fish traps.

I once did a study with a fake profile. I found a pic of a super good looking guy, and put all the right stuff in his
profile, successful, harley, dog lover etc. If I enable this guy, he gets 15 messages and 20 want to meets in 4 hours!
The suprising result was, alot of the women messaging him were 5's at most, not all beautiful women.........take what you want from that.........fish traps, yup.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 176
For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 1:59:43 PM
A study? LOL
Was the guy 1000 times better looking than other guys?
As for the first part.. cool story Bro :/
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 177
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 2:06:22 PM

I once did a study with a fake profile. I found a pic of a super good looking guy, and put all the right stuff in his
profile, successful, harley, dog lover etc. If I enable this guy, he gets 15 messages and 20 want to meets in 4 hours!
The suprising result was, alot of the women messaging him were 5's at most, not all beautiful women.........take what you want from that.........fish traps, yup.


When you make a new profile, it gets noticed way more than profiles that have been sitting there for a long time. It's at the top of the list and it's normal for people to notice a new face.
 JS3344
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 179
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 5:02:44 PM
Ouija - he was what I figured women like, square jaw, killer smile ect, I was dead on the money.....
Coma - wrong.....I can enable this guy anytime with the exact same results, its like flies on shit. Of course, I'm the one that needs to market myself, and I do......but every now and then if I'm bored I let him out of the cage, its really funny, the 5 that rejected me is all over him lol......
 kj521
Joined: 9/20/2015
Msg: 180
For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 5:10:33 PM
^^^^^ That's just wrong. :(
 JS3344
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 181
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 5:44:37 PM
you're right darlin, it was an awful thing to do, and I will punish myself, but sometimes its good to some wrong stuff :D
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 182
For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 7:53:58 PM

I once did a study with a fake profile. I found a pic of a super good looking guy, and put all the right stuff in his
profile, successful, harley, dog lover etc. If I enable this guy, he gets 15 messages and 20 want to meets in 4 hours!
The suprising result was, alot of the women messaging him were 5's at most, not all beautiful women...



he was what I figured women like, square jaw, killer smile ect, I was dead on the money.....



its really funny, the 5 that rejected me is all over him lol......



^^^^^ That's just wrong. :(


Without "studies" and "experiments" such as this, and Jon Millward's 2012 comprehensive experiment "Cupid on Trial"(Google it), men might actually believe the lie that women are more interested in what's on the inside than what's on the outside.
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 183
For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/13/2016 10:19:27 PM


and sex on the 4th date


Sounds expensive :(
 Scaretale
Joined: 1/9/2016
Msg: 184
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/14/2016 8:37:24 AM

every now and then if I'm bored I let him out of the cage, its really funny, the 5 that rejected me is all over him lol......


Uhh...and then what? Do you actually have conversations with these girls? Flirt with them? And then what do you do when they take it to the next level and meet?

Or do you just shoot them all down as a way to punish them for not being receptive to your real profile?

I don't get it.
 Whisky_River
Joined: 12/2/2015
Msg: 185
For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/14/2016 11:18:07 AM
^^^^^ Good question..then what?
Normally, I have found if it looks too good to be true....It's usually a fake profile with fake pics.
I'd be curious on what image you used, that you perceive as "hawt" to all women.
The dumb like a stick gals may fall for that...I use google image and report you.
Likewise with some women using phoney pics....what's the point?

Ouijia

cool story Bro

Funny gal.....big deal eh, he spent money and got laid but he's still on here...
 JS3344
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 186
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/14/2016 3:56:48 PM
fyi, I did not engage in any messaging with anybody, that would be effed up, I only put him out there 3 times. There have been many threads on here about the effect of looks, and people whining about messages not returned, so I did an experiment, big whoop. My own profile does good, I never message first, so no, I am not trying to punish someone for rejecting me, damn, that's absurd dude.
POF is a system, and dating is an environment, you can be passive or try to understand it, by experimenting, reading ect. Why are you even reading this thread, to learn something or just to throw rocks?
 zonavar68
Joined: 8/16/2015
Msg: 187
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 9/14/2016 10:13:00 PM
The only time I've had messages purporting to be from women as the initial step they've all been fakes, and it's not just this site where that happens. It occurs even on the fancy ones like Eharmony, etc.. Normally very easy to tell as being fakes because the profile looks wrong, the pics don't look right (or there aren't any), the text has lots of non-English style obvious grammatical errors, the profile is empty and none of the data is filled in, etc.

Or the big one - the person gives you an email and/or phone number straight off with a really cheesy 'you look sexy' line.

I can't recall a time in life ever (on a site like this or in real life) when a woman has approached me to make the initial contact/greeting! Sad but true fact for just about all guys I think.
 PopCultureGeek
Joined: 11/27/2016
Msg: 188
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 12/1/2016 7:51:54 PM
very rare, almost never happens
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 190
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 12/9/2016 12:48:15 AM
JS3344

Are you still seeing her??. Some guys wont hang around for the 4th date but you did and good for you. i dont see how someone can be a thousand times better than her pic but you sound as though you were smitten. You are tall and educated and so have more chance of getting positive responses than a lot of men on here.
 JS3344
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 191
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 12/9/2016 3:14:54 AM
to answer your question, no not still seeing her, she moved away. She was an actress, also hand and leg model, just really beautiful. I'll date a girl as long as its fun, sex is not the ultimate goal. Finally, being tall has never really been an advantage.......
 2016summer2016
Joined: 3/18/2016
Msg: 192
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 12/12/2016 4:37:58 PM
Only the fakes and the women that men would never message first. In other words, no.
 ebolakitty
Joined: 3/19/2016
Msg: 193
For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 12/12/2016 10:42:22 PM
Yes. Not anymore because my profile is hidden. Funny thing though is that the more noxious and frank I made my profile the more and better quality of traffic I got. After meeting these women, some thought it was a joke. Some just were tired of the beach walkers and couch cuddlers. Some didn't really know why me. I guess it takes all kinds. Still yes, women, including some really good ones, do message people first.

In a nutshell: Guys, just lay it out there. Good, bad and ugly. Let your type find you. If you are all fluff and cliches then she will never find you. Most women don't message men first but what about the ones that do? You don't want to give them a ton of BS.
 RuralRoadz
Joined: 7/12/2016
Msg: 194
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 12/13/2016 1:25:48 PM
Almost all of the women who message me seem to be ones who have just signed up, put up a profile and done an age + mileage search. My profile comes up in their search and they message me without reading my profile too closely. Most of them are looking for some kind of long-term relationship, which I'm not. The women looking for something more casual never message me.
 2ufo2
Joined: 8/29/2016
Msg: 195
For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 12/13/2016 4:15:30 PM

... and the women that men would never message first. In other words, no.


*Sigh* I hate being told I'm ugly. :-(

RuralRoadz - That could be the reason but your profile is also short. Perhaps if you explained more what you're looking for (someone to go to the movies with or simply a FWB) then you might get more nibbles.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 196
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For the guys: Do girls message you first?
Posted: 12/13/2016 7:51:58 PM

RuralRoadz - That could be the reason but your profile is also short. Perhaps if you explained more what you're looking for (someone to go to the movies with or simply a FWB) then you might get more nibbles.

That's true. And also, the motif of his profile, along with the headline looking for a Mature Friendship -- would make one think that he's looking for a wholesome Friends First sort of thing, which some people looking for LTRs can be keen on. It's not a profile to draw in those looking for casual flings -- as those aren't "Mature Friendships" where two people snuggle up by a fire after making birdhouses.
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