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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse      Home login  
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 secret_fun669
Joined: 9/11/2012
Msg: 38
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercoursePage 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)

hes not a virgin we've had sex once and it lasted 37 seconds lol


You've had sex once with a boyfriend you already knew was a virgin and are coming to complain already? Give the poor guy a break. Just be patient with him and tell him what you want him to do. Guide him and let him know what feels good for you and what doesn't.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 39
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 11/28/2012 4:04:57 PM
I have intellectually curiousity, so it just makes sense to me that if you are the least bit interested in something...grab a book and learn more about how to do it well. then grab another book, see if there's something new or something contradictory, and if the latter...figure out why its contradictory. can there be multiple ways of doing something right, and if so, why, or is there one way only? wherever you can find material, do what comes natural and get interested in it to want to read about it, ego be damned. that was before the internet existed :) now you don't have to hunt down "special" bookstores :) lol

how did I learn I was good? well, I paid attention to how others defined what good was, and said, "gee, do I do that?" then there was simply watching the reaction of my partner. if the sheets are sticking to her legs from all the fluids yet I'm wearing the condom, then I must have accomplished something. If we're still going at it at 3am, that could mean something good. if her friends come to visit for no reason a month after we've broken up, that could be a sign :)

a good lover is the one who pays attention to the other person--in that way alone, yes, its instinctual. women are different (I love love love the foreplay, but met a woman who was ready to go from the kiss, so all the foreplay did nothing but oversensitive her.oops), but generally speaking, many like to be brought to a slow boil--i'm thinking that song from the Pointer Sisters--and then they'll keep that passionate heat all night in the hands of a lover who simply pays attention to reaction and wants to be good at it, not just wants to get his gun off.

in the end, he may learn by you telling him what you like. tell it to him not as a lecture, but as a discussion of what you fantasize about. he may get turned on by it enough to try it, or he may get the point of , "oh, that's what I should be doing." either way, you could get the benefit of teaching him. and boy will you stick in his head as a result :)

luckily, you're halfway there, according to msg 27. wanting to be there, makes sex less mechanical. nothing wrong with wanting to raise the bar, if its possible to do so. and I think there's room to do so. like i said, communicate correctly about it. share it, don't teach it.
 playfulpete
Joined: 2/23/2007
Msg: 40
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 11/28/2012 7:57:30 PM
It was the summer of 69
 freshstartbraveheart
Joined: 11/9/2012
Msg: 41
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 11/28/2012 11:27:44 PM
How do you know it was only 37 seconds? My goodness, did you time it? I'm sorry OP, but I can see you holding a stopwatch in hand during the act.... Either that or counting, "One-Mississippi... Two-Mississippi..." in your head. :P

I suggest you Google the Coolidge Effect. Virgin or not, a man will probably not last that long his first time having sex with you as he will after you've had sex several times. The more you have sex together, the less anxious/excited he'll be at the start of sex and the longer he'll be able to last.

What's "good" is also subjective. I saw a few guys mention learning how to be good in bed from porn. As a woman, that's a little disheartening. I'm not here to bash porn. It has it's place but the moves/techniques you see on screen don't necessarily equate to good sex anymore than does a romance movies translate to love in real life. There are things in those movies that would make my blood turn cold if someone touched me that way. Anyway, what feels good to you will not necessarily feel good to another woman so it's up to you to know what works for you and then help teach your man what works for YOU.
 Cavano
Joined: 11/5/2012
Msg: 42
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So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 11/28/2012 11:33:19 PM
ok i learned to "fuqq well" from a relationship with an older woman . Instead of just ramming in and out , u could tell him to add some "swings & sways" .
You have to tell him when he is hitting the rights spots from the right angles of swinging.
In the missionary position he could try driving it in all the way while pressing his body down towards the bed, when deep enough press his body upwards ,bring it back to the edge and then repeat.
(That's one technique i learned and it works pretty much on anyone i used it on , u can go fast or slow however just remember the angle come from how his body is positioned )

Hope that helps.
 wildlifelover79
Joined: 8/15/2012
Msg: 43
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 11/29/2012 6:56:41 AM
I learned it from Quagmire in Family Guy TV series!
 benjameson68
Joined: 9/7/2012
Msg: 44
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 11/29/2012 11:42:32 AM
I first had sex at the age of 12 and continuously kept having sex all the way through high school so I learned by doing it often and with some women i did it with were experienced so I also learned some from them
 salty_blumist
Joined: 11/26/2012
Msg: 45
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So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 11/30/2012 12:08:15 AM
Wow, after reading some of these replies and other similar posts over the years, I must have been a natural when it came to sex...lol. I love how the op states how we have a hard job...lol. I never try to look at it like a job. I prefer to think of the thrusting and so on more as an effort. Otherwise, if it were a job that means, the whole time the women should have been paying us! Not us paying them! The thrusting and different positions I've always thought of as very basic. But, you can learn variations sometimes from watching porn or reading up. Anyone here ever hear of the "Bad Girls Bible"?
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 46
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 11/30/2012 7:02:46 AM
I was lucky that my indoctrination into sex and intimacy started at the age of 13. But it did not evolve into some great sex god, but rather one that was scared of what needed to be done. This actually worked incredibly well, because she was also very scared (she was 15) so we took it very slow and explored a lot.

After our split and for the majority of late teens and early twenties, sex was rather clumsy, more about scoring and giving a good bang, than taking time and enjoy the woman. It wasn't until I met the woman that became my wife that we explored again and took it to another level.

If I knew then what I know now, I would have been a much better lover, but that experience only comes with time, with having great partners, having so so partners and trying to understand the different people that you are with. I recently dated a woman that was horrible in bed. Nothing seemed to work, everything was a struggle. Then I met another woman that was so incredible, the communication between us was unequalled, and the sex borders into spirituality. Well, still is.

So, instead of getting hung up on what you know, think of it as a journey that you share. If you get too hung up on technique, you loose the opportunity to understand the other person emotionally. And always remember that the most important sexual organ that you have is not between your legs, but between your ears. Use it.
 smileitsrteal
Joined: 11/19/2012
Msg: 47
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 12/5/2012 7:37:42 PM
I learned how to have the best sex by being ceative and having an active imagination... what would she like and how can i do it to where we both are excited and climax together? not bragging but i have mastered the art. i had an implant called a pearl put in my junk which goes behind the vaginal bone and massages the g spot. i went out of my way to perfect pleasure, and i haven't regretted it in the least.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 48
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 12/5/2012 7:53:04 PM
Baby you are it.

My first sexual experience was strange because I was scared of all the things doctors talk about. since my dad was a doctor. So we would hang out in my room and push the envelope until we were naked. But we didn't do it right away. It took weeks before we actually did it. Each day we would push it a little further. Letting the anticipation grow, letting our feelings grow. But the time that we actually did it, it felt... well, strange. Good, but not what it was cracked up to be. Awesome sex, takes years to get there. Through a process of learning and balancing wanting to be pleased, and please the other person. If I knew then what I know now.

So, teach him. Go slow. Be gentle. Men have glass castles for egos. They break easily.
 tremble4u2
Joined: 10/21/2008
Msg: 49
So guys when and how did you learn how to have intercourse
Posted: 12/6/2012 12:07:47 AM
your right hell im 48 and still learning haha
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