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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.      Home login  
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 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 2
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when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
As always, the important thing for you to do is, to take the reins yourself. That is, there are no "rules,"even general ones. And if you try to behave as though there are, the rules you accept will be the ones decided by your date.

But I very much sympathize with your question about where to smooch at the beginning. I would suggest that you choose as I have, to recognize more than one or two levels of intimate activity. That is, a first kiss should not be a huge production, leading directly to fondling and fumbling for fasteners. It should be an initial breaking of the private-space limits only. If things are going well, and you want to go further, then you can discuss taking things to a more private local, such as one of your domiciles.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 3
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 8/5/2012 8:01:44 AM

Where do I go from here? Where can one realistically make out with out having sex.



Why, as we age, do we come to believe we can't act like we did when we were younger???? Are ya gonna use the reasoning of "maturity"???? I could give ya a list of "places" I would "make out" but I'm pretty sure you would find them inappropriate. I could also give a list of the spots I kiss,but, you guessed it, inappropriate for sure.
 Zuglo65
Joined: 4/19/2012
Msg: 4
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when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 8/5/2012 8:29:26 AM
I just had to see how old are you..Hm..OK than..

trying to figure out generally online dating rules

There are no rules!

first kiss happen after the first date to see if there is attraction.

Really? I though the kiss happens IF there is attraction.
Kissing in the car is not appropriate? Who knew? Wonder why do you feel like that?
Stopping buy his house doesn't automatically means sex, but don't be surprised if he tries. I would.
 FairOaksChick
Joined: 11/7/2011
Msg: 5
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 8/5/2012 9:03:22 AM
^^^Agree. Save the making out for either your place or his.
 LGG62
Joined: 9/9/2007
Msg: 6
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 8/5/2012 11:19:16 AM
If you do see him at your house or his, and you are not ready to have sex with him, just tell him up front that you are not ready to take that step yet. If he's a d-bag, he'll keep pushing you, and you don't want someone who won't respect what you do and don't want anyway. If he's a good guy, and he likes you, he'll respect that you're not ready and won't push for it. Just don't come across as a tease, because that's not cool, either.
 tinsleyhut
Joined: 12/6/2009
Msg: 7
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 8/5/2012 12:22:43 PM
Thanks everyone for sharing, I'm not sure what I will be doing. He has not invited me over to dinner or for any purpose other than to "stop by".
 AwesomeKisser
Joined: 11/1/2010
Msg: 8
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when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 8/5/2012 3:04:18 PM
Kiss wherever and whenever you want to. What's wrong with two people showing affection for each other? If others are offended that's their problem.
 tinsleyhut
Joined: 12/6/2009
Msg: 9
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 8/5/2012 8:44:54 PM
That's true at least it looks like he's not dating anyone else. We haven't been to each others houses because we live a ways away from each other and have met in the middle for dates. He is a good kisser and I'm sure if given the luxury of an empty house I would not be able to abstain. I think it's the old idea that if we have sex already I may be considered either loose or expendable. I suppose either could be true without a big problem. It sounds like most of you have dates that start or end up at each other's houses, so that's helpful to know.
 abmccray
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 10
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when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 9/25/2012 7:13:02 AM

So, you'd really want to date someone who would think that about you for having sex with him? I just really find it hard to believe that women will date guys who think like that. It's like having no self-esteem.


Agreed. I don't get this at all. For any woman that is scared of being thought of as loose or a slut because they dared to have sex with someone (!), why the heck are they going out with people with sexist viewpoints in the first place?!
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 11
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 9/25/2012 9:07:29 AM
I have been reading these forums trying to figure out generally online dating rules. Many people agree that a first kiss happen after the first date to see if there is attraction. Ok now I have had the third date and we are kissing at our cars in a parking lot of a public place. After age 20 I don't think this is too appropriate. Where do I go from here? Where can one realistically make out with out having sex.


Making out is for high school kids. If you're not yet ready for sex, don't fondle him, and limit your physical contact to kissing only until you ARE ready for sex.

Meet your date in public places where the two of you won't be alone---don't go to his house or invite him to yours, unless you intend to follow through---otherwise he could label you as a tease.
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 12
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 9/25/2012 6:28:10 PM
Use protection and at least you wont fall pregnant if yuo decide to go ahead.


At age 52, I seriously doubt the OP would need to concern herself with pregnancy. Condoms are a good idea, though---to help protect against STDs. Always keep a couple of them with you, just in case.
 H0wAboutIt
Joined: 9/9/2012
Msg: 13
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 9/25/2012 7:16:44 PM


I have been reading these forums trying to figure out generally online dating rules. Many people agree that a first kiss happen after the first date to see if there is attraction. Ok now I have had the third date and we are kissing at our cars in a parking lot of a public place. After age 20 I don't think this is too appropriate. Where do I go from here? Where can one realistically make out with out having sex. Also he has now given me his home address and said I could stop by anytime. Does that mean if I casually stopped by his house he would be expecting sex? Just looking for opinions, advice, or what has happened to others.


Remember: you are in control of your body and can always say "no." Take him up on his offer. It can be awkward just saying "I think I'll take you up on that offer to come over for a hot make out session." Instead, maybe he has a baseball card collection, a vase, some object (whatever), and just say "I remember you telling me about (insert here). I'd love to see it on Thursday at 8." <--- Takes the pressure off -- after all you only came by to see the vase.
 Peppermint_Petunias
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 14
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when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 9/26/2012 2:45:21 AM

Also he has now given me his home address and said I could stop by anytime. Does that mean if I casually stopped by his house he would be expecting sex

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
OR he could just want some gardening tips or help rebuilding his old mustangs carburetor.
 grove_22
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 15
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 9/26/2012 6:29:07 AM
Where can one realistically make out with out having sex


Pretty much anywhere. Just tell him that you aren't ready for sex yet if he wants more than just making out.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 16
when and where appropriate to kiss after first few dates.
Posted: 9/26/2012 4:35:06 PM
After age 20 I don't think this is too appropriate.


After 20, since you are an adult, anything you do with a consenting adult IS appropriate. So if you want to kiss in public, by all means. If you want to park somewhere, please do.

Now if the guy is simply telling you to drop by anytime without making plans, it's a little tacky. But there's nothing wrong with inviting you to come over and watch a movie. I am an excellent cook, so I usually invite them for dinner if the relationship has evolve to a place where we may seek some intimacy. Now, those invitations should not imply sex, yet a lot of times they end that way. However, the secret, at least for the guy, is to not expect anything, just go with the flow, enjoy the company of the lady, do a little kissing and see what is the comfort factor with the lady. Sometimes, the lady will be the one tearing the clothes off the guy, other times leads to heavy petting.

Realize that if you are seeking a relationship, at some point clothes are going to have to come off. If that is not what you seek, then do not mislead this guy or yourself.
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