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 RedDelPaPa
Joined: 5/21/2011
Msg: 51
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?Page 3 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
Enigma,

The only true honesty coming from women are the ones who say that they want that all important chemistry with a man. That part is very true. They crave it. But they're not honest with men about how they can achieve that.

They will never say, "Men, I want you to be just distant and mysterious enough that you're always on my mind wondering what you're doing, and thinking about whether I'm good enough for you or not. I want you to treat me like your bratty little sister."
 HappySingleSpirit
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 52
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 8:41:54 PM
If women can’t be trusted in their honesty even in this forum what’s the point in talking to them at all? And how ironic that comes from men who admit and almost find pride in their honest dishonesty as if they are doing us poor women (who are so misleading) a favor since we are so unaware and untruthful.
 Drawesome32
Joined: 6/26/2012
Msg: 53
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 8:45:48 PM
reddelpapa: haha funny post. i cant argue with it either. i dont think all women are this way of course. its just a trait ive noticed is shared by the type of woman who always says theyre looking for "mr right" or something. i know plenty of women that actually want a good guy that treats them well, but theyre almost always taken and happy. there is a reason for that im thinking.

happysingle: i never once said that a man should be dishonest in trying to get a woman, even though i do think it works better. this thread was just about getting a womans attention by ignoring her. thats not being dishonest. i am always absolutely honest when i approach women. they can take it or leave it.
 HappySingleSpirit
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 54
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 8:48:53 PM
Enigma, why are you repeating your exact same post all over again? I agree with OP and respect your point of view but there is more than one perspective. We don't have to agree, do we?

Edit: our posts crossed. No I wasn't directing anything at you. Just speaking my opinion. Obviously it works for some men to ignore women and I said it before, do your thing if it works for you.
 tgrlily3
Joined: 11/21/2011
Msg: 55
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 8:50:50 PM
I know, my head is spinning because I feel like I'm on here making up a bunch of lies to convince people that I really don't mean what I say.

Here's the thing, when I got treated poorly, I'm talking 25 years ago, it didn't last long. I'm never been into that kind of a thing BUT if you ask me what I was trying to prove, I would honestly say I DO NOT KNOW. It's not like a girl says to her girls , "yeah I'm going to wait for that guy to not call or to chat up other women, then it will look like he's treating me like shit and that's HOT, so once he does that I'll really want him". I mean that's crazy. 20 somethings just don't have that kind of insight. So maybe that's why we're all here spinning in circles and I really need a drink :)

What I do know is that, either done that way at all, knowingly or unknowingly, being treated poorly and wanting it or treating someone poorly as some type of manipulation to not appear interested is manipulation and it's the beginning of one unhealthy relationship and I want none of it. Cheers!
 RedDelPaPa
Joined: 5/21/2011
Msg: 56
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 8:51:56 PM


I hear men say that and I see some women (whom I don’t think very highly of) respond to it but it never made sense to me. The same with chasing games. I don’t think I know and understand others enough to say they are wrong in what they want, feel and think. It just rubs me the wrong way when complete strangers say they are sure of what I respond to or what I am not aware of.

Sure. That makes sense. I'll admit it is a bit arrogant for someone to tell you I know how to push your buttons without you knowing it. However, for a lot of women, if not most, it works. But the key is, the woman cannot know what it being practiced on her. She can suspect it, but she can never know for sure or it falls flat on its face. This is were the man cannot be completely honest with the woman or he loses her.
 HappySingleSpirit
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 57
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 8:57:10 PM
Cheers, my POF friends. I am having Vodka with fresh squeezed OJ and lemon. :)
 RedDelPaPa
Joined: 5/21/2011
Msg: 58
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 9:12:28 PM


If women can’t be trusted in their honesty even in this forum what’s the point in talking to them at all? And how ironic that comes from men who admit and almost find pride in their honest dishonesty as if they are doing us poor women (who are so misleading) a favor since we are so unaware and untruthful.


Well, when it comes to dating advice, women can't be trusted to give good and sound dating advice for men than works. Reason being is they would be giving advice that undermines their d-bag filters, and making it harder for them to tell if a man is really as cool as he seems. As I stated before, knowingly or unknowingly, women are constantly on the offensive trying to find a chink in a man's armor as a reason to send him to their friend zone. It persists the entire relationship. And the more attractive the women are, the more this is true. Women are simply not going to help men make a woman's job harder. Instead, women give dating advice for men that gets them caught in their 1st layer of filters.

Women are dog training men. Possibly without even knowing it. Men are simply trying new things to find out how to get the treat they want instead of being put out to pasture.
 LiterateHiker
Joined: 4/20/2009
Msg: 59
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 10:28:44 PM
Don't be silly. If you ignore a girl, how are you going to talk with her?
 newonthescene76
Joined: 2/24/2007
Msg: 60
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 11:22:43 PM

They will never say, "Men, I want you to be just distant and mysterious enough that you're always on my mind wondering what you're doing, and thinking about whether I'm good enough for you or not. I want you to treat me like your bratty little sister."


Why would any woman want to be in a relationship with someone where they are constantly feeling insecure? I know I don't. I prefer having an open and secure relationship where the man knows exactly how I feel about him and vice versa. These games are simply stupid.
 Drawesome32
Joined: 6/26/2012
Msg: 61
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/11/2012 11:30:20 PM
literatehiker: i dont think you quite understand. no one is here suggesting you ignore a woman totally, just dont pay much attention to her.

newonthescene76: i agree with you. that is a rare thing these days though.
 SunshineAngel99
Joined: 10/13/2010
Msg: 62
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/12/2012 7:43:22 AM

i dont think you quite understand. no one is here suggesting you ignore a woman totally, just dont pay much attention to her.


Or in other words, lead an independent, self sufficient life where you don't come off as clingy or trying too hard to impress a woman.

Women respect men that give them distance to lead their independent lives. A lot of women these days have careers, and many hobbies, so suffocating a woman with attention never works.
 RedDelPaPa
Joined: 5/21/2011
Msg: 63
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/12/2012 11:00:18 AM


Why would any woman want to be in a relationship with someone where they are constantly feeling insecure? I know I don't. I prefer having an open and secure relationship where the man knows exactly how I feel about him and vice versa. These games are simply stupid.


Good question. So why do you/they?

If women don't like it, the solution is really simple. Stop punishing men for revealing their true feelings and emotions, and stop rewarding them for holding it all back. It's simple dog training. Men are simply responding to the rejection by trying new things. And behold, some of us have found some things that work. It leaves us scratching our heads too, but it works. So we do it. :-)

Keeping a woman interested and attracted requires a little bit of insecurity/uncertainty in the way she feels about him. I'm sorry to say, but it's just the way it is.
 RedDelPaPa
Joined: 5/21/2011
Msg: 64
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/12/2012 11:21:06 AM
And here is another thing I forgot to include in my last, and this is key.

Men, you don't need to be an "A-hole" in the true sense. Mistreating women is not necessary or advised. All that is required for most women to label men as A-holes is simply not giving women what they want. That's really it. Most men who have been called A-holes by women have never actually done anything mean, degrading, or disrespectful to women.

Men, all you need to do is not be needy, clingy, and most importantly, be non committal. It's this non committal attitude that causes most women to question whether they're good enough for you or not. This is a key ingredient because as we all know, most people want what they think they can't have. When a woman thinks she might not be good enough for you, most women will want and try to prove that they are good enough. It's just a natural response.

If a woman is allowed to feel as though she's good enough for you, perhaps even too good, you already know what comes next. Next!
 MetalVixxn
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 65
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/12/2012 11:34:32 AM

When a woman thinks she might not be good enough for you, most women will want and try to prove that they are good enough. It's just a natural response.


Really.
Then either I'm not a woman or my natural response is broken.
I've never felt not good enough for a man. And there's nothing a man could do to make me feel not good enough.

Again, this is great advice if the kind of woman you're looking for is immature, insecure and messed up in the head.
 RedDelPaPa
Joined: 5/21/2011
Msg: 66
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/12/2012 1:05:19 PM


Really.
Then either I'm not a woman or my natural response is broken.
I've never felt not good enough for a man. And there's nothing a man could do to make me feel not good enough.

Again, this is great advice if the kind of woman you're looking for is immature, insecure and messed up in the head.


Of course virtually any woman that reads that is going to disagree with it, possibly even get angry. Men's dating advice really shouldn't be talked about with women.

Most immature, insecure women most certainly will not recognize themselves as such. No offense, but you and others could actually be one of them.

Bottom line, women will not help men get past their d-bag filters. And any advice that helps men do just that, will either confuse or anger women.
 RockyDakota
Joined: 5/16/2011
Msg: 67
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 8/12/2012 2:00:31 PM


Really.
Then either I'm not a woman or my natural response is broken.
I've never felt not good enough for a man. And there's nothing a man could do to make me feel not good enough.

Again, this is great advice if the kind of woman you're looking for is immature, insecure and messed up in the head.

So you want a man to fight for your attention?
 aguilayserpiente_1
Joined: 4/27/2014
Msg: 68
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 6/24/2014 7:30:16 PM
What you are describing is the booty Olympics, where the woman feels entitled to having you jump over one hurdle after another (i.e. financial), turning you into the court jester.

Sheesh, everyone in this thread should read books on the subjects of gender rituals and psychology. Women and men should both woo and be honest about what they want.

Ultimately, what brings a man and woman together is their primal sexual and emotional desire for one another. Even if people can cooperate, they will still be miserable if they do not have that primal desire for one another. Tell the woman that you desire her, why, and how you intend to act on it. If she gets hysterical when you tell her that want to grab her and kiss her, and threatens to call the police, good. She's done you a favor, because you will not waste another minute of your time in your search for the female for you. On the other hand, if she responds with seduction, she's being honest/responsible for her own sexuality, and it's on.

Anyone in this thread who judges people for being drawn to someone sexually is a prude who judges people as being bad because they have sex. Sex is the reason that humanity exists; we are sexual beings.

My message to you- conquer. Enjoy yourself. Be safe.
 TrustInKarma
Joined: 2/14/2014
Msg: 69
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 6/24/2014 9:40:16 PM

Anyone in this thread who judges people for being drawn to someone sexually is a prude who judges people as being bad because they have sex. Sex is the reason that humanity exists; we are sexual beings.


Amen.
 LanaTownsend
Joined: 5/27/2014
Msg: 70
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 6/24/2014 9:58:10 PM
ignoring a woman to get her interested only truly works when she is attracted to you.


True. I know this from personal experience. Men who seemed aloof and emotionally unavailable made me want him even more, ONLY WHEN I was actually interested and/or attracted to them. If I wasn't into him anyway, then ignoring me didn't matter.


if she doesnt think youre attractive, paying attention to her wont help either. at least by ignoring her somewhat, you will draw attention to yourself.


Wrong. People who I consider unattractive ignoring me is preferred. Who'd be intrigued by someone they perceive as unattractive ignoring them anyway? LOL.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 71
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 6/25/2014 5:26:26 AM
^^^I agree, LT. I can only hope that all the men out there I have no interest in ignore me. In fact I'd like to ask them to please do so. If I'm lucky someday they will. I prefer all men do - and then fro there I can pick and choose who I want to talk to, but I don't expect that to happen anytime soon.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 72
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You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 6/25/2014 6:29:43 AM
"I can only hope that all the men out there I have no interest in ignore me. In fact I'd like to ask them to please do so. If I'm lucky someday they will. I prefer all men do - and then fro there I can pick and choose who I want to talk to, but I don't expect that to happen anytime soon."

You're overlooking the obvious: because the vast majority of women (excluding you) do not approach men, most men in most situations cannot tell if a woman has no interest in him or finds him unattractive until he approaches her.

Quite frankly, I'd prefer a world in which women had to do all the approaching. I've been saying there should be a website like that for years.

On the general subject of this thread, I have to tell you, if a woman is ignoring me, I assume she has no interest in me and leave her alone. In fact, if a woman is NOT ignoring me, I assume she has no interest in me and leave her alone, because I've been wrong about a woman's not ignoring me meaning she has romantic interest in me almost every time.
 TrustInKarma
Joined: 2/14/2014
Msg: 73
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 6/25/2014 8:58:35 AM

Quite frankly, I'd prefer a world in which women had to do all the approaching. I've been saying there should be a website like that for years.


Never going to happen. Just like there are no prostitutes catering to women or brothels for women and no strip clubs for women. We women don't have to chase men, we sure as heck don't pay to see a naked man - it's ALWAYS been the other way around. Biology.
 Foodnmusicguy
Joined: 5/7/2014
Msg: 74
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 6/25/2014 9:09:03 AM

Quite frankly, I'd prefer a world in which women had to do all the approaching. I've been saying there should be a website like that for years.




Never going to happen. Just like there are no prostitutes catering to women or brothels for women and no strip clubs for women. We women don't have to chase men,


But wouldn't women prefer a site where men couldn't contact them since the result would be :

1 Never getting msgs from men they weren't interested in
2 Never receiving pervy msgs
3 Only contacting men THEY are interested in

?????
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 75
You have to ignore a girl to get her attention?
Posted: 6/25/2014 9:32:07 AM

You're overlooking the obvious: because the vast majority of women (excluding you) do not approach men, most men in most situations cannot tell if a woman has no interest in him or finds him unattractive until he approaches her.

I'm not overlooking that - I realize it, I just wish I didn't have to deal with the fallout from that. If I am out somewhere and don't talk to a guy - it's not because I'm shy...or I didn't see him behind something. I hate to point that out to a guy who asks those questions, but I realize I am part of a small minority.

Quite frankly, I'd prefer a world in which women had to do all the approaching. I've been saying there should be a website like that for years.

Had to meaning in order to date, or had to meaning care enough to want to date? Or be in the mood for it most of the time? Hmmm.

But wouldn't women prefer a site where men couldn't contact them since the result would be :
1 Never getting msgs from men they weren't interested in
2 Never receiving pervy msgs
3 Only contacting men THEY are interested in.

I would. I'm sure some others would.
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