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 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 50
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Proper IDPage 4 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
I can understand, in this day and time, asking for identification, because there are so many "scammers" out there. We need ID to vote, to open credit accounts, to bank, to rent a house or apartment, etc.

A better suggestion is "vetting" the person before you even get involved with him or her. I don't think it's "paranoia", I think it is "watching one's own back." But that's just my opinion. I'm a bit of a skeptic when it comes to people telling the truth -- because I've caught many in so many lies, and exaggerations of the truth.
 Zuglo65
Joined: 4/19/2012
Msg: 51
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Posted: 8/23/2012 5:28:17 AM
Little off topic here, but it seems like everyone worries about identity theft, and I understand that part.
But..Do people realize how many times their hand over their license etc??
Giving out their SS# over the phone.. Banks have them, cable company have them, your employer have them.
It could go to the wrong hands. I just don't think anyone can do much with a DL.
On topic, if she asks I show. Why not? Cover my address maybe. But than I want to see hers.


Marital status, having children, employment... these things are actually more important to me, and none of these can be verified from a DL.

Well said.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 52
Proper ID
Posted: 8/23/2012 7:12:30 AM
But..Do people realize how many times their hand over their license etc??
Giving out their SS# over the phone.. Banks have them, cable company have them, your employer have them.
It could go to the wrong hands. I just don't think anyone can do much with a DL.
On topic, if she asks I show. Why not? Cover my address maybe. But than I want to see hers.


I do not hand over my license unless someone has a legitimate reason to request it. I do not give out personal information over the phone.

I trust my bank. My cable company does not have my SS# or my DL#.

A person with your full name and address can apply for credit in your name. The more information they have, the more likely they will succeed and the more difficulty you will have fighting it.

If a woman asked to see my DL on a first meet, I would laugh in her face, excuse myself, and leave. Or I might show her the birth date while covering up the number and address, and then walk out.
 mjseek
Joined: 8/23/2008
Msg: 53
Proper ID
Posted: 8/23/2012 11:17:21 AM

Thrust nowadays is dangerous, but misguided thrust is even more dangerous.

Agreed. Might I suggest condoms?


LOL! Did I say that!? A Freudian slip indeed, my subconscious mind must have gotten the better of me.
 mjseek
Joined: 8/23/2008
Msg: 54
Proper ID
Posted: 8/23/2012 11:23:50 AM

That's basically what I think this Poster did too


Your analytical skills are beyond reproach...let me be the first here to commend you!
 Zuglo65
Joined: 4/19/2012
Msg: 55
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Posted: 8/23/2012 4:59:26 PM

I trust my bank. My cable company does not have my SS# or my DL#.

Well I am just not paranoid. Doubt it that someone with just my full name , and address can do all that.
My landlord has those info. My employer does.
And your cable company does have your SS#.
 1388SmartBlonde
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 56
Proper ID
Posted: 8/23/2012 8:41:45 PM

OP: Is it okay to ask to see a current driver license on a first meet...I am running up agaisnt a lot of cyber-ages vs ones real-age and a bunch of excuses on why they can't show it to me.


There are a lot of reasons to fudge on age on a public dating site and I would never give out my driver's license or even my phone number until I am sure the other person is safe to give it to and that could be several dates in. Too many nuts out there.

But there is a definite distinction between fudging to prevent identity theft vs. out and out lying to conceal the fact you are older than dirt and hornier than a toad. A couple of years won't matter but 10, 15, 20...get real! If you get to the meet and it looks like the person is lying, ask them point blank if they would like to see the senior's menu or if they graduated high school with your mom.
 Buckets_of_Sky
Joined: 2/7/2010
Msg: 57
Proper ID
Posted: 8/23/2012 8:52:27 PM
I really think asking to see someones drivers license on the first date is quite intrusive and downright rude. One that has been on this planet as long as you (or me) should be able to figure out just by looking how old someone close to ones age should look. You should also know we don't all age the same. If you don't like the way someone looks, no matter what their age you don't have to date them, how very simple is that?
 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 58
Proper ID
Posted: 8/23/2012 9:02:31 PM
Wow. I cannot remotely comprehend as to why this has morphed into 4 pages. The lesson that I have learned here is that although people lie, it is insulting to ask for id.

Shaking head and leaving thread...
 Spring_weather
Joined: 5/20/2011
Msg: 59
Proper ID
Posted: 8/24/2012 11:51:44 AM
The only time I am interested in showing I D, is if I am applying for a job, and they ask for the information sometimes, or applying to other places; other than that , no , it is nobody's business!
 feelin_alright7777
Joined: 12/11/2010
Msg: 60
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Posted: 8/25/2012 1:29:25 PM
I love when I get carded. Its been such a long time !
 Wonder5750
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 61
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Posted: 8/25/2012 9:13:38 PM
hmm what difference does it make how old they are. If they don't trip your trigger does it really matter? Yes people do put up false information.. and I am willing to bet there isn't a profile on here that isn't written to make folks look as good as possible. even from .. to the point of neglecting to state something to total falsness. Ya pays your money and takes your chances.... lol
 masterotaku
Joined: 7/20/2012
Msg: 62
Proper ID
Posted: 8/26/2012 12:53:50 AM
It might be perfectly ok to ask...I just question why it's necessary.

I suppose I just don't get it. If someone you're trying to date is going to lie to you about important things, trust me if you're the least bit attentive you will discover this propensity. As to whether someones chronological age is an important thing....hard to say. I'm 45. My last girlfriend (an amicable breakup after nearly a year) was 27. I've dated as old as 56 in recent memory. I have been physically attracted to every woman I've ever dated regardless of age (isn't this a requirement?).

I've dated A LOT in the last 11 years of being non-married. I can't say I've ever encountered this as a real problem. If any of my dates ever lied about their age it never became an issue here to warrant caring about.
 Houston_Realtor
Joined: 5/24/2011
Msg: 63
Proper ID
Posted: 8/26/2012 5:51:38 PM
Wow, this has been some enlightening replies to the original poster!

I have never been id'd on a date but would have no problem showing my id. I have asked to see id a couple of times. Once the guy was 15 years younger than he had stated. The other time the guy lied about his name and age. For me it boils down to being honest. I don't know you, I'm trying to get to know you, I'm trusting but verifying what you tell me, why is that a problem?

Apparently a lot of you have not been out with big liars like some of us have.
 masterotaku
Joined: 7/20/2012
Msg: 64
Proper ID
Posted: 8/26/2012 11:44:13 PM
I suppose it's just about finding the proper balance between common sense risk avoidance and unnecessary paranoia.
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