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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > A School Girl Crush at 60?      Home login  
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 Whisky_River
Joined: 9/12/2010
Msg: 102
A School Girl Crush at 60?Page 5 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
Lots of us older guys are simply not attracted to women our age but those women are the only ones available to us.

Speaking for yourself....I gather.
I thought, guys your age that had it going on were...getting all the hot young girls...lol??
Sorry...But there are many men...your age and younger... that find women over 45 attractive and quite desirable....
 Pinky127
Joined: 1/7/2012
Msg: 103
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 7:49:50 AM

However he said it never went anywhere with any of the women he dated in the last 10 years. He said those relationships never went anywhere and he has been celibate for 10 years now .


Native ,*I* dont understand that if he is indeed afflicted with this terrible condition - Sexual Anorexia - why he's not doing anything about it??????
He's already got a track record of women leaving him in droves over the past decade so why isnt he seeking professional/medical help??
And,if he didn't want to be friends with you,what did he want????
Im really sorry it didnt work out as you'd hoped : (
HUGS
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 104
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 8:55:16 AM

Native ,*I* dont understand that if he is indeed afflicted with this terrible condition - Sexual Anorexia - why he's not doing anything about it??????
He's already got a track record of women leaving him in droves over the past decade so why isnt he seeking professional/medical help??
And,if he didn't want to be friends with you,what did he want????
Im really sorry it didnt work out as you'd hoped : (
HUGS


Unfortunately he just thinks he is very shy..However me being shy and having dated a host of other shy men I see the difference between the two of us.. When your shy you do not act one way in public and a totally different way in private. Also even a shy person will be romantic and try and kiss you after a few dates.. They are much more affectionate in private then in public and are the complete opposite of what he is.

I do not think he is covered for this medically since he has no additional insurance.. As for what he wanted since he did not wish to be friends? It was for me to work on this problem with him.. I do not have the expertise to do this, nor the desire to put myself in a relationship where I believe this will be an ongoing problem..Also I never felt so unattractive in my entire life and found his depression was affecting my own self esteem..

I hope he does purchase additional insurance and get the help he needs. He will need ongoing treatment done in stages.. If he was perhaps younger my prognosis might be better but alas he is in his 60's not sure how much progress he will make over the course of time.. I wish him well and feel sorry he did not want to become just a friend.. I was not about to tie myself into any other relationship with him knowing and understanding his problem..

Yeah I am feeling down about it, after all it is very very rare I am attracted to man around my own age. However that attraction slowly fading out for me when the fire was simply not being stoked..

However still glad to have had a fire in my furnace so I embrace that and know I am still very much alive and well..

namaste
funnershine
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 105
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 9:36:28 AM

This is what you THINK he has...geez, so did you get a medical degree while you were away? Or a psychiatric degree? You're guessing, taking a big flying leap. You don't know what the hell he has...if he has anything. Did you prescibe treatment too - eat raw and drink lot's of green tea?


No do not have the expertise to prescribe treatment.. Your right I cannot be sure what the hell he has but have never seen it before.. Doubt eating raw and drinking lots of green tea would help this condition though..


There are a host of reasons why he may be the way he is, and it's only your interpretation that there was something indeed "wrong" with him. It didn't work out...move on. Why put some big fancy label on it to justify why it didn't work out. You're guessing, plain and simple.


Yep I am guessing what it comes down to is someone that is not very affectionate and that was simply enough for me..Whatever the term used it really makes no difference since it amounts to the same results.
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 106
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 10:22:48 AM

At least you admit that you don't KNOW what was wrong with him, you guessed or assumed or made it something that sounded fancy and dire - two pages of "poor me" and some dude with Sexual Anorexia when in fact he might just not have been that into you.


Yes I researched if afterwards because something I knew this to not be "normal".. Well I hope the finds someone he is into in the next 10 years, because in the past 10 years he has not into anyone.. I really do think he really needs professional help and that is my opinion of the matter..However that is up to him.

namaste
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 107
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 10:26:40 AM

At least you admit that you don't KNOW what was wrong with him, you guessed or assumed or made it something that sounded fancy and dire - two pages of "poor me" and some dude with Sexual Anorexia when in fact he might just not have been that into you.


You know I think it is rather crazy to want to stay in a relationship when you are not into this person.. but then again that is my opinion..and I tend to think logically..

namaste
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 108
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 10:44:37 AM
The only other alternative I thought of is that he is not attracted to women.. But prefer to think he was in fact honest and not trying to masquerade..
namaste
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 109
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 11:37:33 AM
think it's more a case of you posted a thread about being all giddy with a school girl crush, you had a following of folks (me included) rooting for you, cheering you on, etc. and then it didn't happen so we add a twist, a bit of drama, add a "symptom" or preceived "illness" to the mix instead of walking away and saying "it didn't happen".

I could have said that with no explanation.. however felt people would want to know why.. So shall we leave it as we were not compatible would that make you happier? I think there is something to be learned from every experience so shared mine with like minded people..

I have well moved I was just replying to comments...
 freespiritxoxx
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 110
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 11:44:13 AM
I've been following your post hoping for the best. Thank you for sharing.... the important thing to me is that no matter the age it's the anticapation of those feelings of love.............. the best to you........... xoxxx
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 111
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 2:14:11 PM

I've been following your post hoping for the best. Thank you for sharing.... the important thing to me is that no matter the age it's the anticapation of those feelings of love.............. the best to you........... xoxxx


That is what you can all take away from this.. We maybe older but butterflies can still happen no matter what age you are..
I know one lady that posted found the love of her life on here and he was all the way from Australia and she in the U.S. They are now married and living happily ever after, living in Washington now I believe.. I am thrilled for her she really had that storybook romance..

namaste
funnershine
 Pinky127
Joined: 1/7/2012
Msg: 112
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 6:49:19 PM

We maybe older but butterflies can still happen no matter what age you are.


Native,i said this to you way back (msg 3) vvv

There's one thing ive learnt and that's the butterflies in our stomach we experience when we're younger stay with us,ie: its exactly the same when we're older.

Ps.I also know and met the gawjuss woman you're referring to when i met her when she was here(in Australia)and i had drinks with her and her aussie fiance!
Thanks for sharing your Story - i know a lot of us were wondering!
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 113
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History
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/15/2012 8:45:15 PM

Yes you can google the term sexual anorexia.

Good read. I also googled "opposite of annorexia" and got the following:

Muscle dysmorphia (bigorexia) is a subtype of body dysmorphic disorder, which in itself is a variant of obsessive-compulsive disorder. Sometimes called bigorexia, muscle dysmorphia is the opposite of anorexia nervosa. People with this disorder obsess about being too small and frail and undeveloped. Even if they have good muscle mass, they believe their muscles are inadequate. Usually, about half of people with this problem are so convinced of their perceived smallness.

One would deduce that the sexual bigorexia refers just to one or two selected muscles.
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 114
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/16/2012 5:25:54 AM

Muscle dysmorphia (bigorexia) is a subtype of body dysmorphic disorder, which in itself is a variant of obsessive-compulsive disorder. Sometimes called bigorexia, muscle dysmorphia is the opposite of anorexia nervosa. People with this disorder obsess about being too small and frail and undeveloped. Even if they have good muscle mass, they believe their muscles are inadequate. Usually, about half of people with this problem are so convinced of their perceived smallness.

One would deduce that the sexual bigorexia refers just to one or two selected muscles.


Why would you think just one or two selected muscles? lol
 _babblefish
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 115
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/16/2012 7:14:34 AM

Muscle dysmorphia (bigorexia) is a subtype of body dysmorphic disorder, which in itself is a variant of obsessive-compulsive disorder. Sometimes called bigorexia, muscle dysmorphia is the opposite of anorexia nervosa. People with this disorder obsess about being too small and frail and undeveloped. Even if they have good muscle mass, they believe their muscles are inadequate. Usually, about half of people with this problem are so convinced of their perceived smallness.

One would deduce that the sexual bigorexia refers just to one or two selected muscles.




Why would you think just one or two selected muscles? lol


*passes out graphic tees to selected posters: "anxiety girl - able to jump to the worst conclusion in a single
bound"

you may as well throw in a scarred up torso from a sword fight
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 116
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/16/2012 8:50:28 AM
Weebitrusty said:

What I liked about this whole story was the "school girl crush" attitude - I loved it. I've had crushes, I'm sure we all have. What a great feeling.


That's what I liked as well. I met a great guy down south a few years back and developed an enormous crush on him...we were inseparable all the time I was out there. Unfortunately things didn't work out. But I never forgot the feelings, the giddiness. I want that again.



Pinky said:

We maybe older but butterflies can still happen no matter what age you are.


I am so hoping that is true.

...mae
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 117
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A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/16/2012 9:07:22 AM
Well Mae.....Those butterflies may exist still, but flying may need a little time and assistance as we age, and know that once up in the air, one must land sooner or later......;)

I guess for me, being attracted to someone enough to move me is a great feeling, and rushes blood to all parts of my body and mind, but having a crush is soooooooo temporary, and past history will tell me that they will not last, but while they do......the experience with that person is worth the short term time that will eventually hit one or the both of us!!

I say go for it, and enjoy who you are with, for as long as you care to be there, and understand that tomorrow will never happen if you do not experience today......:)

cd
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 118
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/16/2012 11:13:02 AM

Well Mae.....Those butterflies may exist still, but flying may need a little time and assistance as we age, and know that once up in the air, one must land sooner or later......;)


Although I came in for a crash landing and almost broke the sound barrier doing it, I am still convinced it is highly possible to keep orbiting for at least the first year or two..Then one might experience a ever so slow float down to embrace the earth once again..


I guess for me, being attracted to someone enough to move me is a great feeling, and rushes blood to all parts of my body and mind, but having a crush is soooooooo temporary, and past history will tell me that they will not last, but while they do......the experience with that person is worth the short term time that will eventually hit one or the both of us!!


At this age really do we really now long term from short term.. The important thing is the experience of having a term..Just hoping another term comes around before my clock runs out.. I think really the important thing to have it last is to share similar values with regards to money, sex and kids.. The top three that disagreements can normally stem from..

We did not have the top 3.. not a single one of them.. but still the heart can pitter but it patters out..ggg

Namaste
funnershine
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 119
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/17/2012 8:46:03 AM

Well Mae.....Those butterflies may exist still, but flying may need a little time and assistance as we age, and know that once up in the air, one must land sooner or later......;)


I'll take flying lessons and worry about the landing if and when it happens. Who knows... it may not result in a crash landing. Wanna come flying with me? *grins*

...mae
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 120
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A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/17/2012 8:59:26 AM
Your plane or mine Mae??.....lol

OT......The faster one takes off, can mean the faster they land, crash or not, so the key here is to know yourself and how you fly, and then understand the other and how they fly......and then enjoy the results with that knowledge so that neither of you get more than you bargained for, or hurt when not intended.

cd
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 121
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/17/2012 10:05:30 AM

Your plane or mine Mae??.....lol
OT......The faster one takes off, can mean the faster they land, crash or not, so the key here is to know yourself and how you fly, and then understand the other and how they fly......and then enjoy the results with that knowledge so that neither of you get more than you bargained for, or hurt when not intended.


I'll take you for a ride in my plane and show you what it feels like to travel in warp drive *wink*

But seriously...as short lived as it might be...I would still want to feel that wild and crazy feeling again. Just once.

...mae
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 122
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/17/2012 10:54:31 AM

But seriously...as short lived as it might be...I would still want to feel that wild and crazy feeling again. Just once.


Seriously Mae take up dog walking.. I honestly meet at least 15 new men a week walking my puppy. Make sure the dogs you are walking love people though.. lol

I never knew owning a dog was such a drawing card..
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 123
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A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/17/2012 12:53:11 PM
Like pushing a baby in a baby carriage.....you will get so many that want to talk to you....and more.

I guess I need to get rid of the doll now....it surprises so many!!.....lmao

OT.....Come on may.....Walk up to one you see that you want and take him for a ride.......life is far to short not to!!

cd
 funnershine
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 124
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/17/2012 2:36:08 PM

Like pushing a baby in a baby carriage.....you will get so many that want to talk to you....and more.

I think a baby may draw more women then men... Now a dog draws the more men than women..
So you stick with the doll.. lol
 Wonder5750
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 125
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A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/19/2012 10:06:55 AM
Native, your post makes me smile. Of course you can have a crush...at any age. We associate age with "maturity".... . Hell with that! lol Have fun, chemistry is an awesome thing!
 ForumFilly
Joined: 6/28/2010
Msg: 126
A School Girl Crush at 60?
Posted: 10/28/2012 12:09:37 PM
Native, even though it didn't work out with this man, at least you know those feelings are still possible. Such a shame that he is willing to tolerate living such an empty life when there might be something that can be done to help him. You're a smart woman to realize that you can't 'fix' him and there are other men available, physically and emotionally. Best of luck to you! BTW, I was 20 days shy of 60 when Dave & I started communicating and now, almost 2 yrs later, we are very happily married. Best of luck to you!
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