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 22ogot
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 141
Dating after 45...Page 4 of 12    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
well most that i have talk ed to want to go to a bengles game or two a red game . food and tickets there is over a 100. bucks , what ever happened to a cup of coffee , your just meeting her not taking to vegas , my last dinner was about 65 .00 i didnt get a pat on the head ? . sad !
 22ogot
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 142
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/6/2012 6:46:01 PM
haha ha i agree well hate to say this but 45 is just the beginning , try 65 or more . it is almost not going to happen . ad if you even get a reply it is some thing nasty or very angry . or insulting . i spend most of my time any more just browseing the sights looking for a lady in destress tha i might be able to help of course it is a bad habbit , ha ha ad ya have to be awful care ful . most are very rude and hateful ,
 22ogot
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 143
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/6/2012 7:01:57 PM
wow where have you been ? ha ha i wish the ones i have messaged to felt the same way , most of my messages are with ladies 41 or 45 ad i get accused of being older then there father , ha ha and the ones i really want to meet , block me if i try to return there mesage in a negitive tone , i feel they should at least gibve me the right ot answerthere smart remarks , heck im human and deserve the same ,
 22ogot
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 144
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/6/2012 7:08:16 PM
could ya send me some names and address ?
 kali2008
Joined: 7/31/2008
Msg: 145
view profile
History
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/8/2012 2:24:06 PM
It is all about personality. Serioulsy. After awhile we all have grey hair and glasses.....lol....looking forward to dating at the nursing home.
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 147
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/9/2012 1:04:30 PM

There is nothing tightwad about just going for a coffee. Have you seen the prices in Starbucks??! Plus meeting for coffee means you can easily end the meeting quite quickly if you don't like the other person. If you're stuck there for a four course meal with someone you really don't like, the food is likely to turn to ashes in your mouth!


Going for a coffee or a drink is okay for a first meet, kinda like "trying one another on" to see if there's a possibilty of a good fit. To be honest though, if someone wanted to meet at Starbucks, I would be quick to
suggest another coffeehouse...not a fan. Pricy too. In Canada it's Timmies (Aka Tim Hortons) ....great coffee

...mae
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 148
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/10/2012 1:38:58 PM

could have a different date every week of the year of women over 50 if i chose.

I'm not sure that bragging about how no woman will go out with you a 2nd time is really the way to go...as I understand it, most folks are looking for one of those people they could love and enjoy as a long-term partner,not to date a new person every week.
When the right match-up( or close to it!) occurs, just about anyone can be a "keeper". "Keeper" is a matter of mutual attraction and compatibility. You may be completely baffled by someone else's idea of a "keeper", but that doesn't make you right, and him(or her), wrong.
I will agree on one point-when we get to 45+, there is not such a large percentage of unattached people. Many of the people over 45 have spouses or SOs, more so than people under 25. Granted, not all attached people over age 45 are genuine "keepers"- there are relationships that remain in existence simply because the participants cannot think what else to do. Unfortunately some of these folks seem to find their way into online dating-because they want to have their relationship cake and eat their dating/(side piece) cake, too. Even though someone is hanging onto these persons, I' not call them "keepers", either.
Cindy O
 WS1254
Joined: 11/6/2012
Msg: 153
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/13/2012 8:39:29 PM
Mae,

How true, I made the mistake of dinner when I 1st goinged an on line dating site.
Stuck there for over 2hours with nothing in common.
Coffee or drink great for 1st meeting, both of you can access whether you have anything in common, if not drink it and leave.
PS we have starbucks in Australia and I don't like them either.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 154
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/14/2012 2:35:56 PM

IF it's a first MEET, I agree, coffee and it doesn't matter who pays. First DATE is different. I want a MEET before I got on a DATE.


Sounds too much like first MEAT, which makes me hungry, and reminds me of the days when... Never mind. To many one night stands.

I don't do coffee. I don't do fancy dinners. I do have a DATE. Drinks, tapas, laughs. If I don't like her bye bye. If she offers to pay half, I let her. If there's no kiss, I will simply take it that there was no attraction and we will not have a second date. If we kiss, it still does not mean anything, it simply means we now do the song and dance to set up the second date, which in my book is the SECOND date.

If she thinks I am a cheap skate because I said "sure" when she offered to pay half. Then she is more interested in meal tickets than really be with me. Bye bye.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 155
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History
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/15/2012 6:33:43 AM
Well said, ladyc4, well said....
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 157
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/15/2012 7:02:32 PM
Mae,

How true, I made the mistake of dinner when I 1st goinged an on line dating site.
Stuck there for over 2hours with nothing in common.
Coffee or drink great for 1st meeting, both of you can access whether you have anything in common, if not drink it and leave.
PS we have starbucks in Australia and I don't like them either.


So what are the popular coffee houses down under?

I've cut down on the amount of coffee I consume, and rarely do I endulge in the evening so for me, I would rather meet for a drink.... (a caesar) preferably.

I guess I've been lucky in that "most" of the dinner meets have turned out to be a pleasant enough experience even though we may not have been a match. I say "most" because I can remember one in particular that didn't. In fact it was excruciatingly painful, the conversation I mean...or lack thereof. And It wasn't from the lack of trying......believe me I tried, but it was exhausting, honest.

I finally just gave up and let him watch the hockey game (it came on shortly after we arrived) while I finished dinner....Hmmm, now that I think about it, that may have added to the problem...lol

He messaged me afterwards to tell me how much he enjoyed the evening. WTF?

The funny thing was, he was brilliant behind the computer screen....lol

...mae
 FoxyRon65
Joined: 4/23/2006
Msg: 159
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History
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/15/2012 7:46:30 PM
"Yes they exist but the problem is that they got burned by a woman who told them that they were exactly what they wanted and then turned around and hurt them and they are now guarded expecially if they are recently going through divorce or separation. They are fearful of showing that side or being genuinely who they are because some woman say that is what they want and then it is not really what they wanted and they leave them for someone else. The same is true for woman who were hurt by men who are looking for the same qualities in a counter part."


Boy... have to agree with this one. I'm definitely not fearful of falling again. I actually welcome it. But, I am a little more guarded these days. Oh... if a woman tells you she's all about money, or you sense it while not being a rich guy, I can assure you she will NOT give up her dreams of money to spend the rest of her life with your poor ass. LOL
 Sirenbliss
Joined: 3/13/2010
Msg: 162
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/17/2012 10:36:27 AM
Dont bash the gal too hard. I think I know what she means --- shes' burnt out on guys who dont want to do anything... I dont mind a casual date in the beginning, but if all I get are Mcdonalds hamburgers and stingy cheapskates who dont want to go out or plan something nice, I bolt for the door!

I've run into so many men ALSO who expect to be catered to.

Now if the guy is broke and upfront about it, and I'm into him, I can make allowances. I dont mind sharing the bill in a relationship, BUT there's something to be frowned upon about a guy who has lost his sense of chivalry.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 166
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History
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/19/2012 4:56:52 AM

The same goes for dating, we choose who we date, when we're wrong, look in the mirror for someone to blame.


WHAT!!!! Accept responsibility for our own actions and outcomes in life? What are you? Some kind of lunatic?

Its perfectly obvious that I am perfect in every way and that someone else is always to blame for my imperfect life.....

You must think we are mature adults or something!
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 167
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/19/2012 9:41:14 AM

."That god is a woman" seems an apt statement...

Did somebody call Me?
RTFLMAO.

OyVay, I hope this doesn't ruin your day, or mess up your fur, or anything-but I'm about 98% in agreement with your rant. I personally prefer that "first meets" be to do something fun/interesting(with minimal costs), so that there is a basis for conversation and activity other than the damn "job interview" date.
Cindy O
 WS1254
Joined: 11/6/2012
Msg: 169
Dating after 45...
Posted: 11/21/2012 7:05:06 PM
Mae,

I like the smaller local coffee shops rather than the chains. Much better.

If you ever come to Australia on Holidays I will buy you one.

Noticed you lived in Calgary been there once, while skiing in Banff.

Also am going to see one of your local bands this Saturday - Nickelback - there name come from Gloria Jeans I think - one of them worked there coffee was 1.95 patrons gave $2 and got a nickel back.
 allenb212
Joined: 11/30/2012
Msg: 171
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History
Dating after 45...
Posted: 12/6/2012 3:51:21 PM
We are out there but we have been through the same as you. i have been cheated and screwed over by being what u asked about.
 N2Life61
Joined: 10/24/2012
Msg: 174
Dating after 45...
Posted: 12/13/2012 3:14:41 PM
My definition of a good man is one that is confident, great sense of humor, spontaneous.... the last thing would be financial stability. As long as he has a job and can support himself, that's all good me. I'm independent in many ways, do not NEED a man, but sometimes WANT one.... sometimes u might have to kiss a few frogs to find the prince.
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 175
view profile
History
Dating after 45...
Posted: 12/13/2012 3:19:53 PM
And my definition of a good woman is one that is confident, great sense of humor, spontaneous, and financially independent......that and good looking with a great body and we are more than on the same page.....lmao

So, I guess while you are kissing all those frogs, we are having our backs repaired for all those glass slippers we have been trying on princesses!!.......Go figure!

Dating is dating, nothing changes but you, your attitude and ability to seek what you offer, and offer what you seek!

cd
 mellow63
Joined: 5/23/2011
Msg: 176
view profile
History
Dating after 45...
Posted: 12/14/2012 7:11:43 AM
yep, we do.... what does your checklist look like? Are you being realistic in your expectations?
 Teslar
Joined: 12/5/2011
Msg: 178
Dating after 45...
Posted: 12/14/2012 8:30:22 AM
A starting point would be to post a photo!
 UptownJimbo
Joined: 12/23/2009
Msg: 182
Dating after 45...
Posted: 12/15/2012 1:42:45 PM
Ah, you don't see our big picture. Man orders cheap date, if things are going well, it escalates into drinks and food, and lots of kino. If things aren't going well, he says "I hope you enjoyed the drink, it was nice meeting you." Personally, you sound high-maintenanced, and I avoid those types of women no matter how much money I have.
 dallasinohio
Joined: 12/16/2012
Msg: 185
Dating after 45...
Posted: 12/28/2012 8:30:20 AM
Dating at this age is so hard when you still like doing things that you did when you were younger but the ladies you meet want to stay home or hang at a bar.
 Moonchild51
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 186
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History
Dating after 45...
Posted: 12/28/2012 8:32:00 AM

Women are "players" too. Multiple daters. Just out for free meals, drinks and entertainment. Men here know it all too well.


^^Really? I find it is much less of a hassle to stay home, pour myself a glass o vino and enjoy something I have cooked as opposed to doing the meet/greet thingy! lol
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 188
Dating after 45...
Posted: 12/28/2012 10:53:00 AM
Well, consider this.. We have all had a rough ride in the past but this is the future your aiming for. Not all men and women are the same and its a bit unfair to class "everyone" as shady because there not. I am certainly not and am sure lots of people in here aren't either:)

My 10p worth


No...we are not all alike (thank god) and it just annoys me like he11 when we are all painted with the same brush. I am here to find the love of my life, nothing more...ok...maybe make a few friends along the way. No, not "those" kind of friends either.. hehe.
Oh cripes....when I first jumped back into the dating pool, no one told me how difficult dating at this age was going to be. I know that I am being very cautious, that's because I don't want to enter into something that I will regret down the road. Did that once. But the longer I remain single, the more I seem to enjoy my singleness...what's a girl to do?

Just my 2cents....Canadian...Lol


...mae


Women are "players" too. Multiple daters. Just out for free meals, drinks and entertainment. Men here know it all too well


Oh good grief. I'm thinking if a person wants to avoid situations like that, one has only to offer to meet for coffee or a drink. No meal, no entertainment, problem solved.


...mae
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