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 HeartOn64
Joined: 5/31/2012
Msg: 26
Women Confuse MePage 2 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

Just don't be surprised that a woman with more revealing pics and sexy poses will get more lewd comments.
It is wrong for guys to do that.


If it's wrong,why shouldn't women be surprised?


I am sure women do not like men that have no shirt on in some pics . It does go both ways.


I have no problem with men who do that either.


I will contact a woman with whatever pics. I read the whole profile. I am always a gentleman.


OK...now I get your point.YOU are a gentleman,but other men are "dogs".

Thanks for the clarification.
 Oncetwice57
Joined: 7/4/2012
Msg: 27
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 4:39:18 AM
Well...see the same scenarios and wonder the same also....lol....thing that really confuse me is woman laying on a bed....talking about a relationship.....and then as you say the provacativeness of their photos...lol
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 28
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 5:29:53 AM

.thing that really confuse me is woman laying on a bed....talking about a relationship..


yall are still confusing me..what is wrong with a woman laying on a bed ..even in a sexy pose ..and talking about a relationship??? does a relationship not usually involve a bed??
...does a relationship not usually involve sex ..hell I have laid on a bed with a woman way before sex came in the picture ..even if it is advertising sex ...can that not mean sex in a relationship???do we men want to not see what we may be getting???: are we suggesting the women wear a burka till after the wedding night????I personally like my woman to look sexy ..and that dont mean that any guy who sees her will be sampling the goods.....we claim to be enlightened .. this web site is I would say comprised of a more socially liberal constituency.yet we want to judge a woman by her profile pictures ..and i assure anything very risque ..wont last long on POF..why not read her profile and accept what she says she is looking for

we see a woman on the beach ..she is wearing a tinny little bikini ..its assured she is advertising her body ..thats what people do on the beach ..we go up and talk to her ..she verbally lets us know she is not trying to pick up a man ..but her clothes say something different ..so we press the issue ..and we cant understand why she gets pissed and kicks us in the balls ..is this not the same

we all come from different backgrounds ..what you see as advertising sex ..she may see as just trying to look nice ..to a point ..if i see a 20 year old in short shorts.. I think well thats the way she dresses ...if i see a 50 year old woman in short shorts ..i'm probably going to approach with caution ...but i will give her the benefit of the doubt ....hell her washer may have been broke down and thats all she had that was clean ...the short shorts may belong to her teenage daughter
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 29
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 8:31:52 AM

Women who post provocative pictures have nothing else to offer. They use their bodies because their brains don't tell they shouldn't do that.


And then there are some women that have neither bodies nor brains. I say if you've got it, flaunt it---within reason, of course. Just be aware that if you do choose to flaunt it, you need to be prepared to accept and deal with the bad responses that will invariably come along with the good ones.
 dartmouthjames
Joined: 1/16/2011
Msg: 30
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 11:48:20 AM
Family Guy put it best that I've seen: "50 no's and 1 yes is still a yes." Almost every woman I've ever met or read about or heard of or knew through someone else might of said no today, only to say yes tomorrow, or in 3 hours, or 1 minute. Most women sell themselves in one way or another, and you probably do too. Women who dress provocatively are more likely to get down to the business of selling themselves faster. A determined man can do anything, he can and will shape mountains, and leave you freshly fucked to cluck with your sewing circle of mother hens abou how "men are so confusing."
 HeartOn64
Joined: 5/31/2012
Msg: 31
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 11:59:22 AM
And then there are some women that have neither bodies nor brains.


So true.


I say if you've got it, flaunt it---within reason, of course. Just be aware that if you do choose to flaunt it, you need to be prepared to accept and deal with the bad responses that will invariably come along with the good ones.


I must say,your photo's are sexy 'within reason' and you seem to know how to flaunt it.

Naked arms,cleavage,long blonde flowing hair,nice clothes,make-up.....So....are you up for sex or what? lol

SHOW US SOME MORE SKIN SUPERMAN!

You got it!
 Athletic-Habitus
Joined: 9/12/2012
Msg: 32
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 12:09:55 PM
Well, I say this to ladies...this is just me. Please do not show me just a head shot. It implies that you are not confident in your body, or you are over weight. Show me what ever you can to give me an idea of what I am working with. It is to provoke an interest so I do not bypass your picture. I am a fit person, and am not interested in someone that is in the opposite shape as me. So let me see how confident you are...if you are fat then keep it real and show it in your pic. I will find out anyway in the long run, so why deceive? But if you got what I want, then let me see it in the magazine so I can go to the store to buy! :) I'm no window shopper with females, are they?
 Brandon2go
Joined: 9/21/2012
Msg: 33
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 4:12:55 PM
HeartOn64, you keep stressing that it's not the intent of women to give men a sexual impression of themselves and that it's only the men's perception of sexual intentions. Sexual harassment is not intent but perception. Anyone can feel sexually harassed whether or not someone is intentional in the harassment. So by your logic, sexual harassment is just a misunderstanding in most situations and the victim is just perceiving things wrong.

That's word play on my part but it's just to show you that your perception is a one sided argument that only factors in your perception. In a perfect world we would all think the same but of course we do not. If you post a picture of yourself half naked laying in your bed that picture sends all the signals that you favor sexual attention. If I wore a sports Jersey in my picture you would think I enjoy sports. You can't force the world to accept a perception that is not received by all.

Finally, yes some men will send sexual messages to every woman they meet but only because it works for what they are looking for. I had a friend that would go to clubs and literally walk around the entire establishment asking every woman he saw if they wanted to go back to his place. This guy had more sex than anyone I've ever known even though he may get rejected 99% of the time. So, as long as men find success in this tactic they will keep doing it. The world is never going to see a day where men do not seek sex and women do not fight off hordes of horny men.
 SunshineAngel99
Joined: 10/13/2010
Msg: 34
view profile
History
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 5:01:29 PM
"Dressing sexy" is too subjective.

In Florida, a woman wearing blue jean shorts is considered the norm year round. I don't make the assumption a woman is purposefully is trying to be sexy as a result. But I think most of the people we find attractive or sexy actually don't go out of their way to be sexy...it is that they simply are in subdued settings.
 15111958
Joined: 12/6/2011
Msg: 35
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 5:36:26 PM
Women don't confuse me. Disgust me yes confuse me no
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 36
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/3/2012 5:57:04 PM

Women don't confuse me. Disgust me yes confuse me no


Yeah, we women can be disgusting alright---especially when we're the same age as you, and we're blocked from contacting you. I guess that's one way to make sure you remain free of us old hags that show too much skin!
 lovableladywanted
Joined: 5/14/2006
Msg: 37
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/4/2012 3:37:01 AM
BRANDON POST 41
Excellent post. You said it better than I could. I will use myself as an example. I am about as socially liberal on issues, including female issues as one can be, yet many of these women have me labeled as some sort of misogynist. Honestly, I do not care and I know there is going to be naysayers . These women should not care what anyone thinks of their profile , as long as they are happy with who they are.
 HeartOn64
Joined: 5/31/2012
Msg: 38
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/4/2012 4:24:19 AM
HeartOn64, you keep stressing that it's not the intent of women to give men a sexual impression of themselves and that it's only the men's perception of sexual intentions. Sexual harassment is not intent but perception. Anyone can feel sexually harassed whether or not someone is intentional in the harassment. So by your logic, sexual harassment is just a misunderstanding in most situations and the victim is just perceiving things wrong.


First of all,I dont't see men as victims of women in sexy poses.
Secondly,sexual harrassment is defined by laws that are much more about intent,than perception.

http://www.eeoc.gov/laws/types/sexual_harassment.cfm

Sexual Harassment

It is unlawful to harass a person (an applicant or employee) because of that person’s sex. Harassment can include “sexual harassment” or unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical harassment of a sexual nature.

Harassment does not have to be of a sexual nature, however, and can include offensive remarks about a person’s sex. For example, it is illegal to harass a woman by making offensive comments about women in general.

Both victim and the harasser can be either a woman or a man, and the victim and harasser can be the same sex.

Although the law doesn’t prohibit simple teasing, offhand comments, or isolated incidents that are not very serious, harassment is illegal when it is so frequent or severe that it creates a hostile or offensive work environment or when it results in an adverse employment decision (such as the victim being fired or demoted).

The harasser can be the victim's supervisor, a supervisor in another area, a co-worker, or someone who is not an employee of the employer, such as a client or customer.


Believe me,men may think they have the right to sexually harrass women on POF because they percieve us as "asking for it" but in real life,if they said half of what they do to women who are and aren't dressed sexy,they would be slapped with lawsuits!


But,touche on your twisting of "intent and perception" to suit your rationalizations that women shouldn't confuse men with thier photo's or not be surprised when they do harrass them! That's just victim blaming if you ask me.

The real point is just because a woman dresses a certain way,doesn't automatically deem her solely sexual.


The world is never going to see a day where men do not seek sex and women do not fight off hordes of horny men.


I realize that.But that doesn't make it right.The fact is,it isn't a woman's fault if a man feels as though she is giving mixed messages just because she is dressed provacatively,but rejects him.And isn't that the real "issue"?



yet many of these women have me labeled as some sort of misogynist.


I never insinuated that.I did notice that you were trying to make yourself look "better" than the average "dog" though.

Believe me,when I came here I posted some very sexy photo's and got plenty of men hitting me up for sex.
It didn't matter to me as I knew it was up to me who I allowed into my realm and bed.Shoot...I am about a sexually liberated as they come,to the point that I didn't even mind getting c*ck shots and sending my own "nasty" pic's in return.;) Even that didn't mean they had an automatic key to my p*ssy.

In the end,I didn't give a rat's a$$ if I came off as a tease.I ultimately had the power of choice as to whom I would have sex with and having held out for a year after my divorce,I was damn horny when I finally chose a man who was into me based on my SEXY pic's and a few intense phone calls that had nothing to do with sex!

Incidentally,I gave him head on the first date because he was damn sexy and I was way into him,and he never left my home after than night. :)

We have been living together for the past 4 years because in truth,while I wanted hot and steamy sex...I wanted it within a monogamous relationship!!!!! And that's what I got because I didnt' settle for being some dudes fantasy f*ck.

As Deerdog said,why assume that because a woman is "selling herself" thru her pic's that all she's good for is sex,she's a tease,she's confusing men, when in reality,SEX is a HUGE part of any healthy relationship.

If you don't "approve" of women who dress provacatively to attract attention knowing that in truth,men WANT to see more than less,tough sh*t. Don't look then!!!

If men can't get past the PM stage and are frustrated because the woman he would love to have sex with doesn't want him...oh well.

But don't come here whinning about women confusing you,just because you can't get the sexy ones. :)


Someone grab the jello...I'm ready to roll!
 TheRealMackaay
Joined: 9/7/2012
Msg: 39
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/4/2012 8:37:07 AM
Not much confusing about this topic. Women and men have developed fairly well understood rules of engagement. Women are the ones who prefer to attract men to "win" their love, devotion, friendship, or whatever you call it. Men are expected to initiate the discussions with women about wanting a relationship. Sexual intimacy is something men tend to pursue too early and women usually want to know that we desire it but can be denied and remain interested. Women know we are easily led, manipulated and distracted by sexual invitation. Women, don't post pictures with their sexual characteristics slightly, or obviously revealed because they want to have sex. They want to attract men. Unfortunately, most men are going to respond as though a photo showing a woman's body, bustline, hips, etc. was posted to get quick sexual activity. Rather, I believe that women generally enjoy knowing that men desire sexual relations with them. However, many men just seem to forget the rules of courtship. If the woman was your sister, daughter, or a woman you really cared about, how would you expect one of your male friends to proceed? That ought to guide every relationship you pursue with women. It is not difficult when you take an honest look at yourself.

Sorry, I think it is really simple. remember when we were kids? Did you have any friends who were different gender at the age of 5 - 12 years old? Sexual desire was not as strong and certainly was not utilized to bond during those years. So, it was always about whether you enjoyed somebody's friendly nature, their looks also were relevant but not to have sex. If I don't like a woman, I will never even try to move a relationship to a physical intimacy because it does not make sense to share that with a person I do not see any future with. So, women are free to dress sexy; to act sexy; to post sexy photos because they will definitely attract men. You deserve to have men who are well mannered and who understand how to move through different levels of courtship before even trying to get you into bed. Delayed gratification can be very rewarding indeed. But, women also know that many of their interested men are going to move too quickly to the sexual decision tree because they have no idea how to make sure she is ready to say yes before they ask. That is just the way it is. It is fun and if you like a guy who is too quick to show his horny side, then just remind him that he has to earn it. If he doesn't recognize the validity, don't bother with him again, because he will break your heart if you give him sexual gratification and expect him to be worthy of a good relationship.

It is really simple. Treat every woman you desire the same way you would want a man to treat a family member who is female and you will have little trouble until they want to open joint checking accounts! Sorry, had to end with some irony!
 lovableladywanted
Joined: 5/14/2006
Msg: 40
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/4/2012 8:21:37 PM
Too much infomation from some of these women on here. I could not care at all how women behave. Everyone is different and I am far from a prude. I just submit my observations like others. Provacative or not; The best bait that a woman can use to attract me is wit, warmness and a winning smile. :)
 LG2727
Joined: 1/20/2010
Msg: 41
view profile
History
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/4/2012 9:21:12 PM
It's simple, those women have no self esteem, pride or class. They think they have to put it all out there to please men. Some maybe do because the have nothing else in the physical looks dept to offer, which is really sad that they don't understand what they are doing to themselves. I can see how it would be confusing, but, on that same note...why do men put they want long term and act like a total pig with a decent woman? people are messed up and strange, I just stay away from those types...guess that's why I'm alone, havent found to many normal or honest ones yet.
 Drawesome32
Joined: 6/26/2012
Msg: 42
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/4/2012 11:42:31 PM
hearton: its all about advertisement. its all around us if you look. many of the profiles i see online are women doing the very same thing the OP describes. im not going to say there is a problem with their pics, because there really isnt. however, if you advertise yourself with a bunch of over the head cleavage shots, turn around butt pics, duck faces, nightgowns, and bikini pics, how can you honestly expect men to be interested in anything else? im im scrolling through thumbnails and see some epic cleavage in the center of a photo, as i often do, im not thinking "i wonder if she likes sushi", im thinkin, "i wanna see those jugs!" if a woman wants men to really be interested in HER as a person, then she needs to advertise in such a way to promote that.

lg2727: good post. i think too many women try too hard to attract men with their physical assets, then wonder why we arent interested in anything else.
 itsallhappening50
Joined: 9/26/2012
Msg: 43
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/5/2012 2:29:38 AM
Well said queen saru I take my hat off to you
 lovableladywanted
Joined: 5/14/2006
Msg: 44
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/5/2012 3:51:34 AM

That is by far the most rediculous post I have seen thus far. That sounds like a very basic and may I add, grammatically incorrect reply.

You are criticizing other people's grammar and you can not spell ridiculous. How ridiculous.
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 45
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/5/2012 4:20:06 AM
God I just love these grammar police that seem to always make a grammar or spelling mistake in their post criticizing someone else ..lighten up people ...I know I make a lot of grammar mistakes ..its been a long time since school ...I do have a spell checker so the only time I make a spelling mistake is when the word I misspell is also a word ..but try as I may I am yet to find a grammar checker ..also I am a bit dyslexic so if I post in a hurry I may reverse letters or even words ..I also have a problem with capitalization and punctuation ...which i think is a product of my dyslexia also ... every one does not have the ability to have perfect grammar ...evidently the ones who criticize other peoples grammar either
 NCnavetG8r
Joined: 9/7/2012
Msg: 46
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Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/5/2012 4:14:21 PM
Wow, good points on both sides of about 5 different arguments going on in here. Women are confusing because what they do, and what they say they want, often do not correspond. It's indisputable that sex sells. Women know this, and many use it to their advantage. How men respond is what separates gentlemen from boys.

Woman in short mini-skirt, red blouse and black high heel pumps: I'm looking for a good man who treats me like a lady and doesn't play games. No hook-ups!!!

boy: Hey hot mamma, how 'bout a tumble in the back seat of my Camaro!

gentleman: Hello ma'am, I noticed you look simply radiant in that red blouse. Do you like red wine also? Would you care to meet me for a glass and talk for a while?

See the difference? I think we all do and we all know which is right and which is wrong. Or I should say, socially acceptable or not.
 Phil_an_derer
Joined: 5/30/2012
Msg: 47
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/5/2012 6:22:44 PM
These same women usually don't have an age preference either....enough said!
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 48
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History
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/5/2012 8:54:06 PM

Women Confuse Me

yeah? well men that can't look at a little bit of cleavage without turning into idiots confuse me......

so we're even!
 15111958
Joined: 12/6/2011
Msg: 49
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/5/2012 9:18:04 PM

Yeah, we women can be disgusting alright---especially when we're the same age as you, and we're blocked from contacting you. I guess that's one way to make sure you remain free of us old hags that show too much skin!


Somehow I don't think you would be contacting me whether I had you blocked or not.
 HeartOn64
Joined: 5/31/2012
Msg: 50
Women Confuse Me
Posted: 10/6/2012 2:53:50 AM
It's simple, those women have no self esteem, pride or class. They think they have to put it all out there to please men. Some maybe do because the have nothing else in the physical looks dept to offer, which is really sad that they don't understand what they are doing to themselves.


Asking to be disrespected? No one does that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Umm....I see some cleavage in one of your photo's...You might want to cover up as you are sending mixed messages and leading men on! NO CLEAVAGE! That is sexual in its own right!~ It makes you look like you have no self esteem,pride or class. :(


if you advertise yourself with a bunch of over the head cleavage shots, turn around butt pics, duck faces, nightgowns, and bikini pics, how can you honestly expect men to be interested in anything else?


Yes I can expect them to be interested in something else,but that doesn't mean they are or will be if they are ignorant the the fact that women can't control how YOU react to them and it's not solely due to what women are doing or wearing in thier pic's.


im im scrolling through thumbnails and see some epic cleavage in the center of a photo, as i often do, im not thinking "i wonder if she likes sushi", im thinkin, "i wanna see those jugs!"


Then OWN that you are just a horny man with a one track mind and stop blaming women for your choice to objectify them.We DO have lives and personalities,and feelings whether we have huge tits or not!~



if a woman wants men to really be interested in HER as a person, then she needs to advertise in such a way to promote that.


And pray tell.....how would you suggest women do that? Hide thier sexuality altogether as though it's not a part of her as a person?

I am finding this thread beyond ridiculous.
Thank GAWD for men like Deerdog.



yeah? well men that can't look at a little bit of cleavage without turning into idiots confuse me......

so we're even!


No sh*t!




How anyone dresses doesn't not give ANYONE the right to act like it's an 'open invitation' or that 'she deserved it'.

Also, it makes men look bad to think like this. You honestly like the implication that you are too fvcking stupid to think for yourselves? That you can't ~control yourself~ at the sight of a little skin?

Grow up and act like a normal human being and stop blaming how women do or don't dress for the fact that you can't censor your words or your actions when it's no one's fault but yourself. Plenty of men manage to be decent human beings even when faced with some nice cleavage, so it's not a biological imperative to be an ***hole.



Been said many many times.....they don't get it.Thier reaction and ASSUMPTIONS is a woman's fault.Period.
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