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 VolcanoKing
Joined: 8/6/2012
Msg: 77
Dating a guy who's far better lookingPage 4 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I have never seen a couple where a man is far better looking than the woman...not once. Water seeks its oen level, and the alphas seek out alphas. The rest of us find another average looking person to pair up with.

I have seen the ugly dude with the younger, prettier woman. There is always money involved. But I live in LA...so...
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 78
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/18/2012 10:16:53 AM

I have never seen a couple where a man is far better looking than the woman...not once.


I have, several times in several states.

Years ago my mom had her porch rebuilt and I’m telling you the foreman guy was a gorgeous, sexy HUNK…it was summer and he worked in cut off jean shorts and work boots and nothing else and women up and down our street were hanging out their windows and driving by slowly to gawk at him and drool. Of course I got to actually interact with him. ;) Holy hell.

Anyway. What were we talking about? Oh yeah….his wife was NOwhere near as hot as him. She was a very nice woman, but looks-wise, forget it. This guy was friggin EDIBLE.

There have been others but I can’t discuss them as I need to take a break right now. :)
 LibertyValance
Joined: 5/31/2010
Msg: 79
view profile
History
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/18/2012 10:43:43 AM
YOU HIT IT RIGHT ON THE NOSE BROTHER. ALOT OF OVERWEIGHT MOVIE STARS ON THIS LINE. LIBERTY
 looking4al8e
Joined: 9/14/2012
Msg: 80
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/18/2012 4:39:37 PM
I personally know of a couple where the guy is much more attractive than the woman. It's not too common, but obviously it happens. Not all of us guys are only targeting the hot looking girls. There's more to it than that...
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 81
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/18/2012 4:58:38 PM

Studies shows that most couples tend to be similarly rated in terms of looks.


Okay. Show me the money. Show me those studies. And I hope is something better than Cosmo.
 carora02
Joined: 10/5/2012
Msg: 82
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/18/2012 8:35:47 PM
n all reality we are all humans and some tend to judge. But, Think about it. You could meet the person of your dreams by looks. But if they are ugly inside why should we care about how hot they look. Everyone wants to date a super model, Weather M/F. Ok, With that said lets not pass up interior beauty with external features. Our vibrations attract what we want. If you are negative that's what you will attract . Positive people attract positive people. Unless you have very low self esteem, Rarely you see some holding on to beauty over a negative inside.
 Jadeite19
Joined: 11/16/2012
Msg: 83
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 11:57:56 AM
This is a very interesting conversation. A friend and I were just discussing it the other day. My response during the conversation was basically, if the guy is "too" good-looking, I'm suspicious of his intent from the get-go (especially if the profile says he only wants to date, nothing serious) and I am less likely to meet him because I've been there and done that - not looking for FWB which is what most of those men want IMHO. I don't want someone who is going to "better deal" me. I'm looking for a mutual relationship, not one where everything feels lopsided. Dating is hard enough!

The following probably sounds more complicated than it really is: For an initial date to happen, I prefer the men I meet to be somewhere between 4 and 8 in looks on my 1 - 10 scale (although I know my idea of an 8 is probably not someone else's idea of an 8). I want to find something attractive (to me) about the guy. However, the important thing is that whether or not he is a 4.5 or an 8, he must have a great personality going on, with almost stellar verbal skills. An 8 with no personality quickly becomes a 1-2. A 4 with a great personality can quickly rise to a 7 on first meeting. When I get an email, I look for intelligence, wit, is he funny, and did he say something relevant? Then I look at the picture and read the profile.

I went out with a guy earlier this year who, based on his pictures alone, was about a 3 before we met. But he was intelligent, could hold a conversation, and seemed to have plenty more going on for himself. When I met him, a first glance confirmed that physically, he was about a 4.5 (he had a really cute butt!) and he smelled really good, so he was bumped to a 5.5. As we spent more time together, he was easily a 7 (which is perfectly acceptable when being considered for a relationship). [A friend of mine (who enjoys living vicariously through my dating life) saw a picture of him and although she said nothing, her face said, "Ugh!" But then again, she and I have never found the same men good looking and she usually only goes for cowboy types.] When we decided to stop dating, it wasn't about looks but about essential differences in our drinking habits. He's a much bigger drinker than I am.

Men who are too good looking (or IMHO who THINK they are) are far less likely to say something I'm going to find witty and attractive (probably becuase I tend to set the bar impossibly high for these men and expect more). I WISH this wasn't true, but it is. In that vein, I'll take Big Bang Theory any day over Night Rider. And there are certain personality traits which push all my buttons and can shoot just about any rating straight to a 10 in 2-3 dates. Whether or not he remains a 10 in my book is how he handles himself moving forward. I've only met 2 of these in 2 years, so they're a rarity. Much to my dismay.

All that being said, I think that they way I view this is very much a woman's viewpoint. Men are much more visual and much less likely to consider even meeting someone they consider to be a 4.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 84
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 12:05:38 PM
This not only depends on how much hotter than her he is, but how hot they both THINK they are. I have always dated men I thought were hotter than me but they either had no idea or didn't agree with me that they were. I have also dated men who thought I was a big deal, and I don't share that opinion either...I think it's pretty obvious I'm not.

Granted neither one of us was actually down on ourselves or each other, but we didn't believe we were much better looking than each other or anyone else. It's all about your perception of yourself.

As far as what outsiders see - I have seen all kinds of combinations when it came to couples.
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 85
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 12:41:57 PM

I think some men feel less threatened by a woman who's less attractive than he is. It has a lot to do with insecurity and not wanting to compete with other guys hitting on his woman. If she doesn't have many other options, she's less likely to leave him, right?

You may have a point,, although my girl is so much better looking than me,,I love when guys check her out,, (as long as they are respectful). It's a wonderful feeling knowing my girl is with me,, so I say eat your heart out guys,, nothing you have or can do to take her away from me..am I confident YES,,but I earn that, many times my girl says,, I never see you checking out other women,, my response has always been,, Your the most best, your beautiful,,I love your personality,, I'd be a fool to look else where,,and I have no desire to..
 strawberryrippleicecream
Joined: 10/29/2012
Msg: 86
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 1:08:20 PM
Looks are important to us all - but more importantly being healthy - and fit - gives us confidence and self esteem - But After a few children - and a few years of marriage - both look equally as shot.

Then the man looks at his wife - and thinks - hmmm time for a new model.
- takes a new model and in a few years - same drama, tired and shot - will they ever learn.

Classic.
 Whisky_River
Joined: 9/12/2010
Msg: 87
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 1:35:42 PM
I actually know a guy who even calls his own girlfriend dumpy and knows he can do better. She's a bit of a pushover and completely dotes on him and smothers him with compliments 24/7

That's just sad!! The guys a jerk...she can always lose weight!!

Seriously...Do people actually search for someone less attractive than them???
Or as some have said "settle" because no one else will want them and they don't have to worry about jealousy or her/him leaving...I don't think so!

I seldom see a situation where I would consider one partner much better looking than another..imo.
Of all the couples I know...can't think of one.
There may be a few extremes..in hollywood.ie..like Anna Nicole and the old guy
In real life, partners seem to match each other and/or are together because they saw each others inner beings.
A good relationship is when both people think they are the luckiest of the two...
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 88
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 2:24:52 PM

@rdcnorm, love what you posted! Beautiful way to speak of your woman :) Yes, confidence is key!

Thank you,, warm hugs,,
Confidence is a good thing,,however,, It truly is the other person who gives us that confidence,,because you know they love you, trust you, respect you, then one is compelled do the same in return,, love them back,, and never become complacent with what is so very special.............life should be so simple,, right!!!!,, it is when your in love,, then looks mean nothing,, :).. but I am happy my girl is beautiful..
 kjay41
Joined: 8/19/2012
Msg: 89
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 3:00:29 PM
There's this thing called "confidence"........being confident brings your look points up a few notch! Not to mention the other things like PERSONALITY and oh wait INTELLIGENCE
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 90
view profile
History
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 3:03:58 PM
I think my guy is way hotter than me, and he seems to think the same thing about me.

Kind of an ideal situation.
 Confuzzled4ever
Joined: 6/9/2005
Msg: 91
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 4:23:01 PM
^^^
I second that.. LOL
 Rapunzel1964
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 92
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 5:15:39 PM
I have always thought that many men overestimate their own attractiveness- and science back this up (see peer reviewed journal article). I personally prefer men who are considered ordinary looking or even slightly unattractive.


"Both males and females overestimated their own intelligence, with males, but not females, also overestimating their attractiveness. Positive illusions for intelligence and attractiveness were correlated. Males showed greater positive illusions than females, with this effect at least partly attributable to observed gender differences in narcissism.”

http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1467-6494.1994.tb00798.x/abstract


....And ITA with Jadeite19's post, #86
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 93
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/19/2012 6:08:58 PM
not to be akilljoy, rdcnorm, but why does your profile state you're looking for someone when you're happy with whatcha got? :)

I don't agree with your sentiment exactly, that confidence comes from the other person in your life HOWEVER I'll agree that it helps to have someone see in you, what you already see in you. while our bodies will age and lose the physical beauty, the inner beauty gets better with age, as the maturity level increases...

and knowing how hot you are is easy--observe how others treat you, versus how they treat other people. Is there a difference? if you're outgoing and getting special treatment, then it could just be your outgoing nature. but if strangers come up to you or give you special breaks on things you don't deserve more than any other stranger in line or on things you know you did wrong..then you can guess honestly :)
 Conquistidor
Joined: 10/25/2007
Msg: 94
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/20/2012 12:50:03 AM
I like how you said "The less attractive half has to just get over their hangovers and focus on the strengths............"
And in your picture you're holding a bottle of champagne!!" I'm not insulting you btw, I'm just lol at that comment. It was cute.. But I just hope that you're not a real communist.
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 95
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/20/2012 12:53:42 AM
i date girls all the time who to many are ""better looking"" than me....


but my game and my sh1t is tight so they know I'm doin it right with them.



i would NEVER date a girl that I was better looking than...



cuz I'd neva respect her...


she ain't a challenge..


the challenge for me is dating the women I want to and then either bouncing on them or getting them to wash and iron my clothes...


its that simple...
 Conquistidor
Joined: 10/25/2007
Msg: 96
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/20/2012 12:55:55 AM
I wonder if I can tolerate you for 2 hours ? You make it sound like the woman is the selector? Lol just giving you a hard time you may exhale...... I do agree with the first statement though. I've dated some average looking girls in my time, and thought they were the most beautiful to me, even though some of my mates didn't agree.
 Conquistidor
Joined: 10/25/2007
Msg: 97
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/20/2012 1:13:17 AM
Dude!! Women are not into looks as much as you think. Walk up to a girl look at her in the eyes, project confidence and say something funny with a hint of arrogance to her, tease her a bit, and show her that you have no fear of her beauty. Women get excited when you do this to them. They will try to "test" you to see if you're "congruent", just have a better comeback, to her "test" thats all. It takes a bit of courage, but once you overcome the initial approach anxiety, and you have the correct body language, it's all good. But please do not make the mistake of feeling you have to "buy her a drink" the second you approach her, she's used to that, and dude, you do not need to give her any power.
It automatically turns women off, especially above average ones, if a strange guy offers to buy her a drink. If you get to know her and SHE IMPRESSES YOU, then by all means take her out for a drink or 3. It's about projecting confidence and not really caring about whether she likes you or not. some women will try to tell you the opposite, but it's not true. I mean look at POF for example. There really are plenty of fish out there. Just a few major changes and you will be the man who gets the ladies. I challenge anyone to argue with me about this. All the best!
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 98
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/20/2012 4:31:25 AM

not to be akilljoy, rdcnorm, but why does your profile state you're looking for someone when you're happy with whatcha got? :)

No problem bud,, you must have missed the martial status, {NOT SINGLE / NOT LOOKING} and this first line of my profile..
says,, not single my girl owns my heart.

I don't agree with your sentiment exactly, that confidence comes from the other person in your life HOWEVER I'll agree that it helps to have someone see in you, what you already see in you. while our bodies will age and lose the physical beauty, the inner beauty gets better with age, as the maturity level increases...


I wasn't speaking of what would normally be self confidence as that I have, rather when two people are involved you feed off each other knowing the other persons love is strong, therefore gaining security in a relationship, all the while NOT becoming complacent to where a self confidence takes over,,

As for inner beauty I would most certainly agree,, as for someones outer beauty fading with age, or sickness,, I would have to disagree,
 Tryns
Joined: 5/2/2011
Msg: 99
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 11/20/2012 5:33:12 AM
Funny story.

I met my GF on another site. She only had one picture up on that site and after noticing her pretty smile and eyes, then reading over her profile I decided to send her a message. We traded some messages back and forth and then progressed to the phone. When I first spoke w/her she said she doesn't look anything like her picture online. I'm thinking "oh my here we go". She then emailed me current pictures and.......she's an absolute bombshell. She was pretty in her profile picture online but she had changed her hair color and had lost some weight since that picture was taken.

The funny part of this story was if she had a current picture of herself up I would have probably thought "out of my league" and just moved on. I've never asked her why she didn't update her picture but my guess is she was tired of dudes chasing her for her looks and was hoping to find someone that was more interested in her as a person than just a pretty face. Lucky me I found someone who is not only educated, successful and driven but also and absolute knock out.
 ladysuccubus
Joined: 12/13/2012
Msg: 100
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 1/12/2013 6:24:30 AM
I'm not going to lie, makes me feel uneasy cause usually if the guy I am dating is better looking than me, he prolly has an ex girlfriend that is EXTREMELY better looking than me. I have low esteem as you can see.
 lauraly84
Joined: 3/20/2012
Msg: 101
Dating a guy who's far better looking
Posted: 1/12/2013 10:42:06 PM
I think there are a lot more pretty women than there are attractive men. So the odds of having a more attractive partner is higher with men. Also, I think women are more likely to date someone based on personality and the kind of man he is, where lots of men are more superficial. Sad to say, but that's the way it is. But don't forget beauty is in the eye of the beholder. One man's junk is another man's treasure.
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