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 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 182
What women really look at on your profile...Page 15 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)

I know some of you guys are high on these silly "profile experiments" that have revealed nothing most of us with an inkling of common sense didn't know already, but one thing you're not taking into consideration is the likelihood they had their fair share of women who ignored their douchebaggery, as well.


I do seriously wonder how many of these guys who claim to get XX messages a week are the same turkeys who tend to 'carpet-bomb' the entire cyber-universe with XXXX 'canned' messages a week. If it's 1% replies - it's still 1% - even if it includes the entire state of Alaska.
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 183
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 10/30/2012 9:00:31 PM
CaptainA.D MSG 368:
Playgirl is sold more thanplayboy.


Man, I thought you would have learned your lesson about making false claims like this in the "B!tches" thread.
You really have no credibility. Playgirl is out of publication because it couldn't build a female base. Gay guys subscribed and married guys who were in the closet bought it for their wives. Don't you remember the post from the other thread ?

Msg 473:
http://forums.plentyoffish.com/4786278datingPostpage19.aspx

CaptainA.D asserts (fallaciously): 

Playgirl is sold more than playboy is.
 

Oh, I so like facts and figures.
Playboy: current circulation ~ 1.5 million; online viewers unavailable.

Playgirl: current circulation ~ oh, that's right, there are no subscribers because the hard copy version of Playgirl was discontinued in or around 2009. 
But even at its peak Playgirl only had a circulation of ~1.5 million, where Playboy is now, more or less, your mileage may vary.

But, what makes this story even funnier, in light of the poster's assertion, is that years before the end, the editorial staff at Playgirl had already been changing the format of their skin-sheet to one that appealed more to homosexual males, which at that time (~2003-2006) made up ~50% of their readership, if we were to use that term loosely. Apparently, the homosexual crowd either doesn't like to or is incapable of reading, part of the revamp in format was to minimize words and maximize visual. Since 2009 Playgirl has been online only and pretty much visuals only as well with a not so subtle audience of homosexual males.

So, Captain L. D., next time you want to make assertions using facts and fiction made up out of whole cloth use something that cannot be verified - like sexual dimorphism and gender preferences on Venus or Beta Centauri.

TK
[facts and fiction is fun]


Get your phoney stories straight!
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 184
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 10/30/2012 9:26:28 PM
CaptainA.D MSG 368:
I love women belive me. I just don't understand why they won't give me a shot. And no its not my attitude. I don't say these things irl


Do you really think it matters if you convince yourself you love women?
Maybe you should worry more about what the women you meet think about your capacity for "loving" women.

Here's a tip: why not google yourself and see what the women you've met irl say about you on the review sites?
You may find it to be a bit of a reality check. You may not be coming off quite the way YOU would like to think you are irl!
 MotoGPatrick
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 185
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 10/30/2012 9:29:40 PM

Get your phoney stories straight!


Kind of ironic since the true story is not very straight. lol

Back on topic.

The format in and of it'self is partially to blame. Regardless of gender you look at matches presented as thumbnail photos with a bit of text. Also regardless of gender the ones with the look you like are the ones you click on to read.

I do not profess to know everything about women.. Anyone who can come remotely close to that could do well as a professor and as a best selling author..

I will stand by my opinion that online dating is flawed and actually more difficult even for men who have no problems picking up women in the real world.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 187
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 10/31/2012 12:27:21 PM

what they look at in profiles (assuming your picture is good looking enough to get you that far); A) income B) other pics


From toying with profile specs in Match, what I found made the most changes, as far as profile views -
1) Height
2) Changing / updating photos
3) Changing 'goal' from 'Long Term' to something else
4) Income

Income was almost a negligible difference - pretty much the same as saying pets/no pets. But, my 'market' is Minneapolis/St. Paul - Income may carry more weight in other markets. I think tall (6' plus) guys around here are kind of rare, thus the stronger 'need' to find one online.

If you think I was 'bad' to 'cheat' and change my profile, well, I did this after being active online for two years, so my profile was NOT anything 'new' to see - or deceive - and I wanted to quit, but Match wouldn't refund that six-month fee even though I wanted to drop it about three weeks after it was renewed. I didn't message or 'wink' anyone under false pretenses; just changed a setting and let it be for a few days to see what kind of attention it drew in. Seeing new faces in the 'viewed' column meant there was people searching for items OTHER than who I was, and by making those changes I popped up on their radar. Of course there is always a margin for error, but I can definitely say making myself 'taller' drew in more looks than changing out photos.
 e0wnzit31
Joined: 8/1/2010
Msg: 188
view profile
History
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 10/31/2012 12:59:23 PM
It is very true every female on here says one thing but is usually the opposite should not expect anything different. Just like guys base judgement off looks also just how humans are.
 MotoGPatrick
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 191
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/4/2012 2:27:24 AM

It's pretty pointless to sit here and argue which sex is more "forgiving" when it comes to looks.


To argue about it is pointless. From what I have read in actual scientific studies is that in a way women ARE more forgiving.

here is a snip


But with the basic ratings so out-of-whack, the two curves together suggest some strange possibilities for the female thought process, the most salient of which is that the average-looking woman has convinced herself that the vast majority of males aren’t good enough for her, but she then goes right out and messages them anyway.


^^^ women are more judgmental and even harsh online about looks but actually more forgiving in overlooking them.


Our chart shows how men have rated women, on a scale from 0 to 5. The curve is symmetric and surprisingly charitable: a woman is as likely to be considered extremely ugly as extremely beautiful, and the majority of women have been rated about “medium.” The chart looks normalized, even though it’s just the unfiltered opinions of our male users................When it comes down to actually choosing targets, men choose the modelesque................So basically, guys are fighting each other 2-for-1 for the absolute best-rated females, while plenty of potentially charming, even cute, girls go unwritten.


^^^Men actually asses looks more fairly and realistically but are not as forgiving as women when it comes time to message.
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 192
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/4/2012 4:04:26 AM
"Actual scientific studies?"
You mean like a blog on ok Cupid?
I find it humorous that you would quote a "study" that refers to "some strange possibilities for the female thought process," then purportedly goes on to interpret this mysterious thought process as "the most salient of which is that the average-looking woman has convinced herself that the vast majority of males aren’t good enough for her."


For real?
The ok Cupid "researcher" performing the study 1) admits that he doesn't comprehend the meaning of the data, yet 2) he goes on to give some specious explanation which is swallowed whole by the reader as a feasible interpretation for the data?

Wow! Just goes to show there IS a sooker born every minute!
I think the more likely explanation is that women have a hard time ranking men on an attractiveness scale objectively (i.e. displaying a man's photo out of context to a female member of a dating site is off putting, since a mans attractiveness for many women encompasses more than solely his appearance). In other words, this little "experiment" does not work the same for men as for women.
JMO.

Here's a link:
http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/your-looks-and-online-dating/

The "study" also states:

two-thirds of male messages go to the best-looking third of women. So basically, guys are fighting each other 2-for-1 for the absolute best-rated females, while plenty of potentially charming, even cute, girls go unwritten.

The medical term for this is male pattern madness.


Yes. That is a "scientifically" derived conclusion.

ETA: OMG, Dude! You have a four year degree and you're in Aerospace? Let's hope your previous post was tongue-in-cheek!
 MotoGPatrick
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 193
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/4/2012 5:19:36 AM
I am willing to admit that nearly every guy from a hunk to a short, fatty, balding virgin living in mommy's basement is primarily trying to pick up the most attractive women.

I think you are just pissed because it implies that women value looks more than you are willing to admit and it also implies that they are harsher critics online. Is it a feasible interpretation for the data? Hell Yes. Is it the only possible feasible interpretation for the data? No

Any study will never work the same for men as women since we are different.

I feel that you won't even consider any negative implication of any study scientific or otherwise in regards to how women value attractiveness.

In words that even the simpletons on POF can understand... You're pretending your sh*t don't stink.

Actually most guys here would have crossed up you're with your.

An actual controlled scientific study would be lost on 99.999% of POF users and compared to most of the posters such as octane rush the OKC bloggers might as well be Einstein.

The blog does make sense to me given my actual experiences. I have tried many different things online. It does not matter if I head out to the OC beach cities in the Italian sports car or sit shotgun in a friend's Camry. I do so much better with attractive women in the real world than online.

When an educated orange county bombshell is less stuck up than many of the girl next door types online it sure says something.

FYI My studies did not delve too far into the social sciences. Not a priority in my field.

What is the most intellectual way to prove a point... Oooh I know lots and lots of smilies! You must have a PH : D
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 194
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/4/2012 6:11:18 AM
^^^ Ooops! Hit a nerve.

Umm. Yeah. My studies did not focus on social sciences, either. I started work with BDM in the late 70s. I was in graduate school and teaching "Numerical Methods for Engineering" to undergraduates. I guess you may say that I thought people who supposedly have a technical background could discern the difference between an "actual scientific study" (which is what you seem to think it is ) and an infotainment blog.

But, hey, keep on bolstering up your own theories with a bunch of specious "data."
And, since you don't like "smilies," I'll just put it this way - Hahaha!
 MotoGPatrick
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 196
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/4/2012 7:33:08 AM
In this department my skin is way too thick for someone like you to have struck a nerve.


why you're still here after more than a year of not winning in a system that you claim is stacked against you.


I am deployed to Afghanistan and in forums only mode POF is reasonably entertaining. Yep I am off as part of a multinational coalition to keep a religious fundamentalist terror group from taking over an entire country. We are keeping misogynistic wack-jobs from taking over so they can do things like shoot teenage girls in the face for supporting equal education rights for women.

That is what I am up to..

What do you do with your time? Pretend all women are perfect and hate men?



in other words, men will only talk to the women they are self-assessing as suitably attractive to themselves yet likely, beyond their reach by their own definition. and what a shocker that isn't. wow we need a study to figure that one out.


I don't need to read a study that proves it to admit that this is a typical flaw in male behavior. Why is it that you are acting so pious about your own gender?

Even stating that I am deployed on another site I am doing quite well actually. The communications infrastructure is much better since my last trip and I can actually just call them on my cell or use a VOIP app over wifi when I get a number. It still is not as productive as offline and yes before I left the US I had some good dates via the site even being up front about deploying. For each date there were probably 20-30 that were all in until they learned about deploying. It's some work for sure.. Unlike my POF inbox at least not all spam, scam and BS.

Well now that it is morning back in the U.S. I will be done on the forums for a while. Women I have dated and keeping in touch with as well as those that want to go out when I get back are starting to contact me... Hasta!
 MotoGPatrick
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 198
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/4/2012 8:09:30 AM

>why did you think i was being pious?


Probably because I do not deny the short comings of most men where as you have yet to admit that women are capable of having short comings. My point was that women may have a higher standard of what is mega hot but it is not as mega important to them as for men.



> because that's the kind of behavior you have grown to expect from women based on your vastly unsatisfactory personal experience? or is it because all women on POF are spam, scam and BS??


No but your last post was a bunch of convoluted BS. Offline introductions have vastly been satisfactory experiences for me. The forums are fun but as compared to other sites the dating side was just not worth the effort.

I get one day off from 12 hour shifts and have little to all do all day apart from the gym.. That is until people back in the US I actually want to talk to wake up. A little banal banter on here to remind me just how much better the women I actually want to talk to and will soon are than those that are on here.. That is all. HA.
 Drawesome32
Joined: 6/26/2012
Msg: 199
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/4/2012 3:38:39 PM
moto: you hit the nail on the head man. one of the biggest reasons men are offended by all this nonsense is the fact that many of the women are still in denial about any faults they may have. the men just dont get it. we read all these profiles about a woman wanting a nice, funny guy, and when we know that we are nice, funny guys, we are confused when we are ignored. especially when the girl we are trying to contact is just some girl next door type, not a beauty queen.

keep on, keeping on, man. stay safe over there.
 Dare to
Joined: 2/11/2009
Msg: 200
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/4/2012 4:08:58 PM

Offline introductions have vastly been satisfactory experiences for me.
I'm not sure i understand why someone who has such vastly satifactory offline experiences is even online at all...



Even stating that I am deployed on another site I am doing quite well actually.
Women I have dated and keeping in touch with as well as those that want to go out when I get back are starting to contact me... Hasta!
Oh now i get it..... He's b1tching about women being soooo fussy online, but HE"S got them lined up at the door... Bit like a candy store hey!
 MotoGPatrick
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 203
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/4/2012 8:04:40 PM

I'm not sure i understand why someone who has such vastly satiSfactory offline experiences is even online at all...


I don't understand is the most common phrase I have heard from Harley/Cruiser riders since I got into bikes at 7. I am online since I am downrange in Afghanistan for a while. So my normal social life is on hold..


Oh now i get it..... He's b1tching about women being soooo fussy online, but HE"S got them lined up at the door... Bit like a candy store hey!


Online is more work due to all the static and head in the clouds expectations. I never said it was impossible. POF to me stands for Polluted Over Fished where dating is concerned and People On Forums when it comes for any redeeming aspects.

If they are "lined up at the door" or not remains to be seen when I get back to the states. In the mean time it does make for some intelligent and fun conversation with normal well adjusted women.
 MotoGPatrick
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 204
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 11/14/2012 1:21:46 PM
Not exactly an entertainment article... Dry but covers my points well.

www.psychologicalscience.org /pdf/PSPI-online_dating-proof.pdf



Despite the strength of people’s motivation to keep their options open, however, many studies have demonstrated that a large degree of choice can overwhelm people, undermining their ability to make good decisions and sometimes producing a state of choice overload, in which people simply avoid making any decision rather than exerting the mental effort required to compare and contrast so many options.


Basically they get overloaded by the available options and just don't make any decisions to actually pursue anyone or the quickest way to weed out the options is via being pickier and more judgmental. Since it is a quicker and less taxing way to pare down the suitors.

edition.cnn.com /2012/02/06/ health/online-dating-pitfalls/index.html



The abundance of profiles online also may make daters too picky and judgmental, the authors say. The sheer number of options can be overwhelming, and the ease with which people can sift through profiles -- and click on to the next one -- may lead them to "objectify" potential partners and compare them like so many pairs of shoes.


Which explains why men email objectify and email primarily the most attractive. As well as why those women on the receiving end either just don't reply at all out of option overload or get much pickier and judgmental than women of similar attributes in a non online dating situation.

 alex.e
Joined: 12/6/2012
Msg: 206
view profile
History
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 3/2/2013 12:53:50 PM
Hurrah! welcome to the real world bro, its a shallow place. but now that you know its weaknesses, exploit the shit out of it.
 alex.e
Joined: 12/6/2012
Msg: 207
view profile
History
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 3/2/2013 12:56:41 PM
I guarantee that you have compromised your principles in the past for shallow motives.
 alex.e
Joined: 12/6/2012
Msg: 208
view profile
History
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 3/2/2013 12:59:38 PM
So, you're a photographer arguing AGAINST aesthetics? You realize that your last paragraph basically reinforces many shallow beliefs? why do you think nice clothes and a clean kitchen are desirable?
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 209
view profile
History
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 3/3/2013 5:48:37 AM
(OP)

I eventually retroactively compiled all of the unsolicited first-messages I've gotten of a certain negative nature...and they are very entertaining and educational, in the context of what's in my profile. It's really weird that they would say the things they've said about my profile compared to what's in my profile. I always wonder how I can "legally" post this compilation of first-emails for others to see, but don't know how. (Can't put them in my profile...wouldn't be any room for the profile.)
 Casper66
Joined: 3/2/2007
Msg: 221
view profile
History
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 3/8/2013 12:40:34 AM
Of course you look at the picture first it is a dating site, why would you contact someone who you don't find attractive in some way and since we are individuals with our own preception of what we find attractive it could be anything from nice eyes to a great smile and yes hot too, I tend to pass on the shirtless pics I find them tacky. Then I read the profile if I think we have some common interests I'll send a message and see if the man replies, if not then I move on, it really is that simple. These so called experiments are a joke, of course you are going to get some men and women contacting you with a model pic up, but in reality are they the type of people you would want to associate with if thats all they care about, hell how do you know those profiles are even real could be some kid or teen just messing with you. This is not real life you don't have the advantage of body language, visual cues or getting to know the real person, with online all you have is a pic, sometimes, and words in a profile to go on, and then you have the flakes, fakes and players to weed thru, after all that then you have to try and meet in person, it is what it is.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 223
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 3/8/2013 11:32:59 AM

Maybe some men are confused because they try to fit themselves into what they believe “women” want...


I would add to that being totally vague about what women desire in their profiles does NOT help the situation. Having a three-sentence profile means there is a LOT left up to the imagination, and a LOT of room for miss-interpretation. I wish I could delete every profile that has the worthlessly generic 'Having Fun' in their list of 'interests', but there is just too many.
 forthewinwinwin
Joined: 5/21/2011
Msg: 226
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 3/9/2013 11:35:33 AM
Well, got to find the person attractive first to begin with... normal...

Actually, most young women just want a good looker. At most they'd consider your occupation (i.e. student or no-education?) to see what kind of guy you are.
 SunshineAngel99
Joined: 10/13/2010
Msg: 228
view profile
History
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 3/9/2013 4:09:17 PM
OP, interesting thing is, that guys who have looked at my profile believe I should be getting tons of messages from women. But I never do. Go figure


Unfortunately you may be a victim of your own success where women doubt that you are genuinely real haha. Many women have told me the same thing as they can't believe I am single or I am just playing games (lol?).

I have to admit I have had a handful of women comment on my profile, but most indeed ask me more questions about my picture. :)
 DomG79
Joined: 3/12/2011
Msg: 232
What women really look at on your profile...
Posted: 3/9/2013 11:47:56 PM
Some seem to appreciate my humor. The not so attractive ones tend to make the first move. When I make the first move, I am typically ignored. At least it's free though.
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