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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > For some reason I seem to have lost all of my female friends.      Home login  
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 deere_rancher
Joined: 4/4/2012
Msg: 12
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Being the same age as Michael Jackson ....He was great in the Jackson five,
and I was a big time fan when the Thriller album came out .

Not long after that , I decided he was just too d*mn weird,
and stopped buying his stuff ..

could perhaps your friends feel the same ?
Friends
Posted: 5/26/2013 3:14:00 PM

Making new friends isn't easy, but getting out and socializing is VERY easy and along with that comes new friends. - verygreeneyez

I wish that it was that easy, for some of us, it's not. I didn't see anything in your profile Kevin, that indicated if you were shy. You sure don't sound it. But since I am very shy, it occurred to me, that this might be an issue for you, in making new friends. And I know better than to make assumptions, as people will often say that I don't "look" shy.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 14
For some reason I seem to have lost all of my female friends.
Posted: 5/26/2013 5:04:45 PM
1) some people are just too flakey. the phrases, "bros before hos" and "chicks before d1cks" came about from "friends" who identify themselves by who they are dating. the ones who disappear when taken, reappear when broken up, claim to want to really re-connect with friends then disappear again when the partner who just broke up with them calls back.

the question then becomes, why be friends with people who have such little sense of identity? Solve this in yourself, and you will be attracted to better friends.

2)if you are too busy with friends, you will tend to gravitate towards people with the same work ethic...which means, of course...they are too busy, too.
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 15
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Posted: 5/26/2013 8:49:06 PM
I would tend to agree with Verygreen, it is probably related to your being different and also the comments about maybe these chicks are starting to feel their biological clocks and don't think that the type of men who want to settle down are going to be comfortable being around you. I agree that homophobia may be an issue even though it's completely inaccurate to your situation.

And here's the thing, friends come and go, it's just the way of things. Sometimes there is a reason, like Verygreen said I think it was probably too hard for those particular friends to stay around so instead of sucking it up and staying a good friend, they did the easy thing and bailed. I've seen the same thing happen when people split up and they don't know which person to hang around and in the women's places I think sometimes they are afraid to have the now newly single woman around.

Some of the females may wind up knocking on your door sometime down the road, if not, you didn't lose much and you just have to put yourself out there and meet people :)
 GJBrown
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 16
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Posted: 5/26/2013 9:31:26 PM
I think it may be hard for OP to keep old friends and make new friends cause "judging by this post and his profile" He is a cross dressing chatterbox! alot of people don't like that. ha
really dude why did you write a whole essay in your about me section!? Good luck to you sir. friendly people eventually make friends
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 17
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For some reason I seem to have lost all of my female friends.
Posted: 5/26/2013 10:47:16 PM
Perhaps it is something to do with the economy down, that most people can't afford to hangout in bars/club/restaurant. They just hangout at the POF forum, BSing ( bull shit ting) , or playing Dear Abby.. I could be wrong why your female friends don't hangout with you. But that is what I do now........... I decline invitation to parties and girls night out ..

edit:
Oops ! You are boy dressing like a woman, I know why your female friends don't want to hang with you, because you upstage them.. You 'll have more fun going out with BEKE boys like you..
 Hanoverfella
Joined: 2/14/2013
Msg: 18
For some reason I seem to have lost all of my female friends.
Posted: 5/27/2013 6:16:46 AM
I know if I was a woman clubbing, I wouldn't want some dude hanging around that was actually prettier than most of the women at the table...lol
Have you been hit on at bars by men? Is this your goal? It's probably awkward for the whole group when you have to explain to every horny gent you actually prefer women, and you just dress up in drag for the fun of it.
 jan1025
Joined: 3/23/2009
Msg: 19
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For some reason I seem to have lost all of my female friends.
Posted: 5/27/2013 7:21:11 AM
People can be fickle, especially straight people.

Honestly Kevin, maybe you need to figure out who you are.. I mean the cross dressing and being straight is confusing to straight people. You need to find friends that are as confused as you are (in a good way). I don’t mean to sound mean, but seriously are you straight, bi, or gay? Are you in the closet? Do you date Bi-sexually?

A straight woman isn’t going to want a man that dresses like a woman. Just like a straight man isn’t going to want to hang out with other straight male friends that dress like women or want to date them. I mean in percentages that is… I think you need to find more friends like you.

I am straight and there is no way I would date you even though you say you are straight, and if you were my friend and I liked you as a man, and you were dressing like a woman when we went out, I would probably have to stay away from you. If we were friends from the beginning as you crossed dressed, we would still be friends, but if you started this cross dressing way into our friendship, I would start thinking confused. I’m a different type of friend though, because I would be asking you questions WHY? WHY? And WHY NOW?

Maybe these friends of yours liked you for how Kevin dresses as the male Kevin and were having a hard time with you being straight but acting/dressing like a woman. I know I would, and I am just being honest with you. Why? Because you and I are wired differently that's why.

If you want to cross dress then you need to find people who also cross dress, this way you will have understanding, friendship and people who can understand how you feel about things.

My advice to you is this, turn the page in your life. Don’t try to figure out other people, and don’t take things personally, unless they are in your face. You can’t second guess people, because each person is wired differently. If you want to confront them, go to their houses knock on the door, and if they are real friends they will talk to you about why they are acting weird towards you. If they don't answer the door, walk away and don't look back. Don't call them, don't connect with them ever again. If they are your true friends they will come around eventually.

Lastly, find friends in the cross-dressing community that will support you, and understand your needs to dress as a woman. As I already said, and as far as your friends go, real friends stay even if you don’t hear from them all the time.

Hope this helped.
Take Care,
Jan
 lostnfoundluv
Joined: 1/10/2009
Msg: 20
For some reason I seem to have lost all of my female friends.
Posted: 5/30/2013 9:09:56 PM
friends who are intimidated with you are going to leave you alone and you dont want them anyway. have you tried to mingle with people who live life the way you do?
 LoneScottishBoy
Joined: 2/13/2012
Msg: 21
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Posted: 5/31/2013 9:49:28 AM
I can only offer an opinion, but here goes:

I think its a combination of the age group you are in and the perception they have of you...or what they think others may.
Mind you, it's probably NOT you, but what you represent in their minds.
I could be very wrong about this but I'll give it a shot.

Most of the gals around your age are beginning to have the thoughts about settling down.
In order to join the camps of the "settled", they have to be sure they arent hanging out with the "unsettled" or the "undecided". Cross dressing has a decided "undecided" feel to it. Just by it's very nature it suggest a duality that some may not feel comfortable with. They may think of you as a "fringe" person...IE not "in the norm"...therefore not part of the settled camp.

My dumbass theory is that because you represent something that may call odd attention to itself, they may be avoiding you in order to make themselves look more ready to join the settled camp.
Picture a potential boyfriend asking one of your gal pals what "your deal" is?
He may react in any number of ways from understanding to straight out homophobia, but one thing IS certain. It will single the gal out as someone who still sympathizes with the undecided camp.
Doubt will be cast.
Maybe it's attention she doesnt want.

Im not saying they do this on a CONSCIOUS level, but maybe unknown to them.
I have noticed a similar "stigma" after getting divorced. A lot of my married friends took a quiet backseat. Some changed attitudes entirely.
To put it lightly, it was "like divorce was contagious".
It may even be a little in a social kind of way.
Someone who wants to preserve their marriage may unknowingly take steps to avoid exposure to it or shield their mate from it.

MAYBE a similar thing is happening to you.
Then again, I could be dead wrong and I hope I havent offended you.
I just thought it might be a good thing to put it out there.

Good luck to you! :)
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > For some reason I seem to have lost all of my female friends.