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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to w      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 DameWrite
Joined: 2/27/2010
Msg: 58
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What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?Page 4 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
Abelian: It's not malarky. The OP asked a question, I gave her what I believe to be a true answer.

I don't have much respect for those who who want to marry. (it's that religious/society thing again).

This does not mean that I think guys need my help or that I'll agree to give them a boost (though I might). I may be careful with my wording but I won't tip toe about with my words as if I'm responsible for his reaction either, nor will I have lots and lots of great sex because it's expected, (though I like that part). I'm not a tool. (I'm also not the marrying kind).

I do believe that the marrying kind really do want what I posted because in my experience, that is what they claimed when proposing. Surprisingly I've had quite a few proposals. (so many I wrote a joke about it). Too bad you missed my earlier posts. (plural).

This is why I avoid the marrying type. I would fail to live up to their anticipated expectations.

If they didn't have expectations, then they probably wouldn't feel the need to marry.

I see others agree with the concept of what the marrying type might want, and think that it probably would work in real life if marrying or staying married was the goal.

You may have different needs and/or desire's before you propose, but I doubt that you would turn away what I posted the OP could offer if it came from an individual who had it together and you were O.K. with marriage.

I know I'd find it hard to turn down.

Oh, one other thing... there may be some truth in the primal where's the fem looks after the masculine so that that masculine can look after the fem.

Green eyes spoke (wrote) from experience as well as from not being needy when the need may have been there to be for her man.

This is not a perfect world where everyone related on the same level. Probably best to get used to it or stay single.








 chernika
Joined: 5/5/2010
Msg: 59
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 11/23/2012 5:36:32 PM
I have the same issues as you! I dont know if there is the One for me any more.I hope you feel better, knowing you are not alone!
 Confuzzled4ever
Joined: 6/9/2005
Msg: 60
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 11/23/2012 7:38:26 PM
Well.. i don't know a guys mind.. But I'd think it's be ya know.. him wanted to stay with you and wanting you around for the long haul.

Men are not "simpler' then woman. They are just different. They think different. We think hearing "i love you" is more important whereas they think doing all those little things they do for you says "i love you". You have to recognize that those little special things he does for you, are because he loves you. He will eventually articulate that sentiment, but women are not exactly known for our patience in that matter. I guess because i'm rather blunt and i'm gonna tell you what I think and feel and if you don't tell me i'm gonna eventually ask you what you think or feel about things. No guessing games. I don't lie and I expect the same in return. I actually listen and I expect him to as well. So if he's lying it's figured out pretty quickly. I guess because I do that and because I will tell a guy exactly what I expect and what I am looking for and what I want, that I don't have those issues with them. I do find that men are generally more tight lipped about stuff like that.. but it goes back to what I said. If you say "i'm out of wine" or "i lost my bottle opener" and he goes out to get it or shows up with it.. that's his way of showing you he cares.

And actually my boyfriend would make me eat those words. We have the best conversations. I feel like I know him better then I've known anyone in my past .It's amazing what open honest blunt conversation can lead too.
 dreaming2468
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 61
 ggpaws
Joined: 11/6/2012
Msg: 62
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 11/30/2012 10:50:00 AM
wow a lot of opinions. Mine, well one word "Love"
When a man is totally in love with a woman and wants to spend the rest of his life with her. Hold her through the night. Wake up beside her in the morning. Share the last chocolate chip pecan cookie with her. Sometimes we don't choose who we fall in love with, it just happens.That is when a girlfriend goes to wife.
 Confuzzled4ever
Joined: 6/9/2005
Msg: 63
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/1/2012 6:15:45 AM
~~~
Mine, well one word "Love"
~~~
Romantic.. :~)

But come on.. If all we needed was love we'd all be happily married already. Reality shows that it takes more then love to make a relationship work. I'd have been married twice already if all you need is love. (actually probably 3 times, but I can't decide if that 3rd one was real true love or just the honeymoon stuff) I was in love with my son's father, but knew it would never work. He was way to lazy and way to irresponsible for me. I was also in love with another ex, but he was afraid of commitment and pushed me away. I stayed with both of them way to long with the hopes that they would step-up and be the marriage material man I wanted. They both loved me, both talked about our long term futures together.. One included marriage the other did not. When you really start to think about it.. more then love matters. At least for the long term. I don't ever want to be in a marriage where we're both not happy.


~~
Share the last chocolate chip pecan cookie
~~
That is love.. I kinda resemble cookie monster at Christmas time.. if I share it with you.. I must love you.. LOL
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 64
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/1/2012 7:20:50 AM

What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?


Lots and lots of really good whiskey. And when I say lots, I mean,like 3 days worth, sipped in a 24 hour period,without the ice!!!!

And of course,,,,,


Oh, and lots and lots of great sex.


is a given.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 65
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/1/2012 7:57:58 AM
verygreeneyez says:


They just want to be loved, tended to, cared for and put first on our list of priorities.


Holly sh it, this is the jackpot.
 the_biggavell
Joined: 7/9/2012
Msg: 66
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/1/2012 11:18:38 AM
My attitude about is just fine, guys ask whether or not you are good enoigh, because we are attempting to get you.

For a woman to ask that question, would imply shes initially putting in effort to do something. See women feel they are on a pedestal, a high hose judging. And there are certainly s great deal of men out there that will allow you to feel that way.

They are deceiving you, and as a result, you join the game, when the lady asks, is he good enough, because you are only choosing, JUST because you have a vagina, that we want.
 the_biggavell
Joined: 7/9/2012
Msg: 67
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/1/2012 11:24:48 AM
http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/11/24/war-on-men/

If you wish, read the last paragraph.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 68
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What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/1/2012 11:58:34 AM
I read somewhere that one of the big differences between men and women and marriage is that, women tend to meet a guy, fall in love, decide they're ready to settle down and build a life around him. Men tend to build their lives around themselves, and when they decide they are ready to settle down, they fall in love and bring her into the life he's established.

I agree with the person who said to stop trying to "get a guy". Just be the person you are and the guy will hopefully come along who wants that person.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 69
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/1/2012 2:02:21 PM

Dating = works in a beer store
Girlfriend = manages a beer store
Wife = owns a beer store


Marriage starts going downhill = guy drinking all of the beer in the beer store

What makes a girl-or boy-go from dating material to marriage material is when the person feels they have the hottest looking guy/girl in their social circle. It's a competition to see who can snag the hottest one on the market. Look what happens when a woman gets an engagement ring. The first thing she does is show it off to her peers. The second thing that happens is every woman with an engagement ring compares hers to theirs, and the ones with the el cheapo rings get jealous and feel their guy doesn't love her because he didn't get her the crown jewels. It's the same idea when snagging a fiance-it's all about who can get the crown jewels of hotness in mating meat.
 AngelofHonesty
Joined: 1/4/2012
Msg: 70
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/5/2012 9:18:52 AM
Dating Material...."What he does for you" to make you girlfriend status

Girlfriend material...."What you do for him" to make you wife status

Wife material...."What yall do for each other" to keep marriage status..


Plain and Simple...Don't make it complicated, Genuine Love is easy, and status will come naturally!!!!
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 71
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/5/2012 10:45:05 AM
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?

Time.

Anything else is irrelevant. Time spent together means more than any accomplishments, events, or activities you've done. The fact that you are still together, through thick and thin, is what love is.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 72
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/5/2012 11:15:59 AM
When a woman's attitude goes from: "I like the fact that we don't share a home. I can't tolerate being with and seeing someone everyday. I need my alone time" to: "I would miss him if he didn't come home to me everyday".
 tussypop24
Joined: 10/20/2009
Msg: 73
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/9/2012 7:57:01 PM
Yeah thats a good question that I have been wanting to know?
 RandomFish123
Joined: 5/30/2012
Msg: 74
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/9/2012 10:39:25 PM

Just be the person you are and the guy will hopefully come along who wants that person.


^^^ Yep.

I don't think you can make yourself really anymore "marriage material" other than having your sh*t in order and hope that mr.marriage-minded will come along.

Well, to maximize your chances, of course try to stick to dating only men who make it clear from the get-go that they want to get hitched someday at some point. .. Whether or not you will be the one they want to get hitched to is no guarantee. .. Those are the kinks that no one can provide some magic formula for you to work out with since everyone's needs, wants and desires are as individual as they come.
 1cares
Joined: 8/23/2009
Msg: 75
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/10/2012 3:18:42 AM
First of all, if a guy is sending you messages of his genitals, you shouldn't date him. That is disturbing to receive during your first communications. I have received that many times and just ignored the person. There are also those creepers that try to talk a lot about sex before you even meet. Ignore. You need to learn the right type of person to date first because it sounds like you are dating a bunch of creepy guys.

You should have enough respect for yourself to not jump at the first sign of attention someone gives you. There are lots of good guys out there that are not all about sex. I am not saying sex is not important in a relationship because it is, however in the beginning you need someone who will woo you, and invest his time in you. There are many guys out there that will wait for sex.

I have always stood by Patti Stanger's (Million Dollar Matchmaker) philosophy that sex should go hand in hand with monogamy. There are too many diseases floating around, and not only that, but women (well most women) need to feel comfortable with a man before they open up to sex. I prefer to wait until I trust my partner.

I think if you date guys who show respect towards you in the beginning, that is a good start. Once you meet a really great guy, it will be so much easier to spot the bad ones. :) Good Luck!
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 76
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/10/2012 1:13:09 PM
Its about what feelings the woman brings out in the man when ever he sees her or when he is away from her.
Same goes the other way...

Like I told my ex gf before we moved in togher. Don't make me not to want to come home, Or that would happen. When I relized that I'm staying at work longer after everyone left to read a book or a magazine. I left her a short time after that.
 AusteniticSteelMan
Joined: 12/7/2012
Msg: 77
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/10/2012 4:44:53 PM
"What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?"

Yeah this is pretty much decided after the first few dates.

I can tell right away when a girl lies to me (books on interviewing skills are so cool....that is if you don't turn completely cynical.) or if we're going to go somewhere other than just one date. Mind you I'm not wishy washy and indecisive. Most guys are not sure what they want, and are pretty wishy washy. *shrug*

I'm also not the kind of guy who'll string a woman along, if she's looking to get married and I don't see her in my wedding pictures, I'll stop things right there. Other guys? Well..what do you think?

You should try to recognize the signs of this behavior so you can nip it in the bud. It sounds like you have experience with it, why not try to learn from it?

I'm not really sure how you think it's an 'evolution'. I believe it's more how you guys click and if you keep clicking as you go. And then if enough clicking and time passes, and you're both good to go, then it'll go.

But a wise man in trailerpark boys once said, 'sometimes she goes, sometimes she don't go...that's just the way she goes.'

Basically, if a guy is looking at you like an object, you're sure bass ackwards about how you select your men, pumpkin, sorry.

Nothing is ever easy. Finding your life partner should be one of the hardest struggles of your life, which will probably result in the sweetest reward of your life as well.

Keep fighting onward, you'll get it one day.
 natgoat227
Joined: 6/10/2012
Msg: 78
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What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/12/2012 12:05:29 PM
Dating material : Someone you wouldn't be embarrassed to be seen in public with....that is attractive and friendly.

Girlfriend material: Developing a relationship that is more-or-less exclusive.

Wife material: exploring each others personal habits
(Everything from cooking / cleaning after cooking to bathroom habits and cleanliness...on a daily basis)
...adding how sexually compatible you are and maintaining a good amount of time admiring, appreciating and
actively stimulating each other.
It helps if you just can't keep your hands off each other!!!
 pmannn
Joined: 3/17/2004
Msg: 79
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What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/12/2012 1:17:02 PM
What makes a woman desireable at all is what she can bring to the table besides sex. When a man and a woman have sex they are both having sex so why should that be the sole thing a woman should have in order to qualify?

I like a woman that is secure. I mean financially, mentally and emotionally. There are women out here that date men because of material things and all they have to offer is some stinky puss. I cannot do for a woman what she is cannot do for me. That goes for money and sex. We should be able to mentally and emotionally stimulate each other as well as help each other financially.

But it seems like your question is how do you get a keep a man. So I will give you the magic formula that will make a man NEVER leave you. Give him good food and good head. 9 times out of 10 thats all a man square man wants.

Everything else is hear-say.
 strawberryrippleicecream
Joined: 10/29/2012
Msg: 80
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/12/2012 1:27:34 PM
I'm suprised this question needs to be asked.
Maybe others feel the same way, but It's impossible for me,to force myself,to love someone ,or be with them intimately, if I dont adore, the very ground they walk on, also friends are just friends, and they are clearely defined, as are family.
If we didnt have boundries, then any and all people, would be potential prospects, its how you are brought up, in many ways, defines, how you rationalsie, the decision.
 BostonTerrierx2
Joined: 12/7/2012
Msg: 81
What makes a girl go from dating material to girlfriend material to wife material?
Posted: 12/12/2012 1:37:37 PM
When I was young, sure... Sex was on everybody's mind. It was the nineties, before we all became idiotic Puritans. But I digress.

Beauty is often a motivator for dating but that wears off quickly. There's an old saying. "Show me a hot chic and I;ll show you a guy who's sick of her shit." If someone's stunning but at teh same time a ratchet jawed twit, uneducated, under read and ignorant of the art of conversation, then no, I can't date her. On the flipside though, the woman that can walk into a situation and hold her own when left to her own devices, discuss politics, religion and the weather without offending anyone is a great start.

For me, when I can leave someone alone in a new group of people and she handles it, that's pretty much the time I fall in love. Relationships are supposed to be about complimenting one another, being in synch as more than just romantic partners. I get turned on by the mind.

BUT, but, BUT!!! Make no mistake, a woman that good is often a scary prospect because men, traditionally, don't know what's best for them and do something stupid like take a pass on what could be the perfect mate because she's better at all the same things he's good at. Ego, crusher. It hapens.
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