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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?      Home login  
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 swm69
Joined: 2/7/2013
Msg: 51
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?Page 3 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Probably depends on where you live. I meet way more women in person than online.
 barnabyjames1
Joined: 1/11/2013
Msg: 52
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 4:02:00 AM
A few friends of mine have met their mates on Match. I find this place to he extremely tough to find good, quality women, most have a shit ton of baggage, and want the near impposible in a mate. Plus(& I cant speak for other parts of the country)but here in SoCal, ALOT of phoneys , gold diggers, and vindictive women. Alot of single moms too, holy jebus.

EH was/is crap. Women thought I was lying when I told them I'd never been married,nor had any kids....not everyone has done either. But they dont care, there's something wrong with me(as one woman put it) because Id never been married, nor had kids(and she contacted me). Plus, the layout was weird.

Zoosk I tried once and it sucked.




Abmccoy(or anyone): if you do the 1 month thing on match, do they keep charging your cc if you decide you dont like it and want to stop paying? are they tough about that, or do you have any issues with refunds should the month be over with, you want to cancel, and theyve charged your card again?
 curviest
Joined: 5/28/2010
Msg: 53
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Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 4:33:02 AM
I would HAPPILY pay if someone could point me to a website that has as members men in my area who want a relationship not a free whore service.
 abmccray
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 54
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Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 5:18:25 AM

Abmccoy(or anyone): if you do the 1 month thing on match, do they keep charging your cc if you decide you dont like it and want to stop paying? are they tough about that, or do you have any issues with refunds should the month be over with, you want to cancel, and theyve charged your card again?


Nope. They only charge your card if you don't cancel before the end of the month. If someone I find interesting (that's a real profile) contacts me, or my inbox backs up (you can't read emails until you subscribe), I typically subscribe for one month, then cancel my subscription the next day so that I don't forget later and get automatically charged for the next month.
 jimintoronto2
Joined: 11/8/2011
Msg: 55
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 8:06:48 AM
Lavalife has gotten to be the worst site in my experience, a lot of scammer/fake profiles, only keeping the profile open to use up my last credits, then will be closing my account.


Agree completely. I was on Lavalife for 6 months as a paid member, and it was totally useless. Nothing but 20 and 30 year olds contacting me endlessly (scammers, of course). The most interesting thing that happened after my paid membership expired, was that I got a smile from a lady who I had been interested in, but never heard from after contacting her. She was also online almost every time I was on the site. I think it was a fake profile just to draw guys in. I returned her smile, as it was the only thing I could do and, of course, never heard from her. I've since deleted everything and left Lavalife for good.
 spot4username
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 56
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 8:25:44 AM
I believe it is largely geographical. It seems that some sites are super popular is some areas and dead in others.

Where I am the majority of the men on Match are also here on POF. There is some crossover with OK but not very much. OK is pretty sparse in these parts. It has been many, many years since I was on Eharm but when I tried them out I got "matches" that were far beyond my location requirement and older than my age requirement. In other words, it was a total bust and waste of money.

The biggest problem I always had with any paid site was that you have no way of knowing if the profiles you are viewing are active or even real. I am dirt poor and not willing to spend money just to see if a profile is active or to read an email. Especially when that email could be just a rant about my profile. That has happened one too many times. I can't imagine paying for that sort of abuse.

I'll stick to the free sites with forums for me to muck around in and real life.
 Me_Me_Me_Pick_Me
Joined: 9/11/2012
Msg: 57
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 8:43:02 AM
The quality of human being seems to be better on Lava than here on average. However, it is a pay site.

There are no guarantees with whatever site you sign up with. It's just a tool to meet someone who you may not encounter normally; both good and bad.
 jimintoronto2
Joined: 11/8/2011
Msg: 58
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 8:48:52 AM

The quality of human being seems to be better on Lava Life than here on average. However, it is a pay site.


Good luck with that. Also, you don't have to pay to join LL, but you can't do anything without a paid membership, except send smiles. If the other person also hasn't paid, you can send endless smiles back and forth, but you can't do anything else. There's also no way to know if the person you're contacting is a paid member or not, so it's a crap shoot.
 Me_Me_Me_Pick_Me
Joined: 9/11/2012
Msg: 59
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 8:59:57 AM

Good luck with that. Also, you don't have to pay to join LL, but you can't do anything without a paid membership, except send smiles. If the other person also hasn't paid, you can send endless smiles back and forth, but you can't do anything else. There's also no way to know if the person you're contacting is a paid member or not, so it's a crap shoot.


I've been on and off of it. They've changed their formats over the years. The used to have a monthly feature where you could contact as many individuals as you wanted to. I know they switched to using a credit format, which I thought was a mistake. At one time you could respond to messages without paying or use their chat feature as long as someone else contacted you first. I know I'll get the occasional e-mail saying there is a "free weekend," but I haven't really used it in awhile. I don't even have an active profile on there because I've become jaded with online dating in general. But looking back, I'm talking about my experiences on Lava compared to POF and it has been over a period of years.
 jimintoronto2
Joined: 11/8/2011
Msg: 60
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 9:57:24 AM
I've been on and off of it. They've changed their formats over the years. The used to have a monthly feature where you could contact as many individuals as you wanted to. I know they switched to using a credit format, which I thought was a mistake. At one time you could respond to messages without paying or use their chat feature as long as someone else contacted you first. I know I'll get the occasional e-mail saying there is a "free weekend," but I haven't really used it in awhile. I don't even have an active profile on there because I've become jaded with online dating in general. But looking back, I'm talking about my experiences on Lava compared to POF and it has been over a period of years.


Yes, they have changed the way they operate over the years. I've also been on and off the site many times. At the moment, the way it works is how I posted above. From what I can tell, most dating sites use the free sign up gimmick to suck you in, then get you to pay, because you really can't do anything useful. POF is the best site overall. Just my opinion, of course.
 barnabyjames1
Joined: 1/11/2013
Msg: 61
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/12/2013 5:53:18 PM

That's pretty irrelevant on match. If you wink + message someone (as opposed to just messaging them), it often gets them to subscribe if they're really interested in you or vice versa (I've done the same thing - subscribed for a month just to respond to someone with a really good profile that showed interest in me). The only thing you have to check for on match is the activity date (to know if they're an active member), and the obvious spammer cues that are -really- easy to spot immediately (which is why spam profiles normally last for a matter of hours). Using "wink etiquette" means that you'll get a pretty good number of paying responses with little risk, -if- you have a good profile.


Thanks alot. So if you get the 1 month thing, it allows you to check your emails(messages) there if you have them, right? is it once, or as many times within the month, if you keep getting messages?
 jimintoronto2
Joined: 11/8/2011
Msg: 62
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/13/2013 7:57:28 AM

Thanks alot. So if you get the 1 month thing, it allows you to check your emails(messages) there if you have them, right? is it once, or as many times within the month, if you keep getting messages?


I have experience with a couple of other sites that let you pay monthly. During that month, you can do whatever you want because you're a paying member. When you don't renew your subscription, you revert back to non-paying member status. They both also default to an automatic renewal at the end of your 30 or so days, so you have to be aware of this if you want to unsubscribe, otherwise, a payment will go through for the next month.
 EmpireOfTheSun_
Joined: 2/10/2013
Msg: 63
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/13/2013 3:26:36 PM
O K Cupid has the best forums. OkC's forums are "hidden", so for new users the only way to find them is through Google. Plus, they are unmoderated as well.


POF has the most people, and I don't see that changing.
 soo-girl
Joined: 10/22/2011
Msg: 64
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/13/2013 6:26:13 PM

O K Cupid has the best forums.


I found the OKC forums to be kind of lame, but I haven't been there in a long time, so that may have changed. I do have to give the main site a thumbs up, though, because I met my sweetheart there.
 LathaMath
Joined: 1/2/2013
Msg: 65
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/13/2013 7:57:14 PM
To find out about dating websites you can search the Internet under "analysis of online dating" or "dating website analysis". One brings up a review popular websites ranked by users with statistcis on male/female ratio and so forth. The other brings academic studies. One which was mentioned in the book "Freakonomics" analysed one of the dating website databases. One of the things they did was to compare what a person's profile said they wanted with the people they contacted and found they were not the same. Either people lie in thier profiles about what they are looking for, or they don't know what they are looking for. Either is equally likely in my opinion. :)

Online dating, like social media, is subject to studies by sociologists, psychologists and the like. You should be able to find loads of reports about online dating.
 forum_moderator
Joined: 1/24/2003
Msg: 66
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Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/13/2013 9:31:26 PM



Have fun with this article, from an actual reputable publication:

The Scientific Flaws of Online Dating Sites



the other
Any site related question not answered via the HELP link, then email CSR@POF here || Site Rules Here || Posting Clarifications Here ||
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 67
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/13/2013 10:35:47 PM
MATCH Pros:
- Higher % of good looking women
- Lower % of single-moms
- Lower % of on-the-rebound
- Lower % of trashy/bad-quality picks
- Better response rate (due to it being a 'classier', paying site)
- More open to or looking for an LTR
- Less male competition

MATCH Cons:
- Fewer women than POF (which helps counter it's pros of better % picks)
- You have to pay to read/write
- The women have to pay to read your msg, and you don't know if they're paying or not

OKC Pros:
- Best knowledge about the personality of the users due to it's Q&As
- Lower % of single-moms
- Higher % of intelligent women
- Much Higher % of alternative/emo/veggie/hipster/nerd types (Also a Con)

OKC Cons:
- Fewer women than POF
- Lower % of attractive women than POF
- Much Higher % of alternative/emo/veggie/hipster/nerd types (Also a Pro)


<div class='quote'>Have fun with this article, from an actual reputable publication:
The Scientific Flaws of Online Dating Sites
I disagree with it's claim that one can't make a matching algorithm that's more than marginally better than random selection. Now, I've heard eHarmony's matching algorithm sucks balls and I believe it. Just the feeling of them handing you matches by 'science' with a romantic aura makes one look at the bright side more than red-flag-hunting.

But it's obvious you can do better than marginally better than random selection. Height, body type, racial, smoking, and drinking differences are much better + preferences marked on those and others like kid-related. Some may screw it up, but come on -- that's easy to make an algorithm based on one's stats & preferences matching up. I just think as far as true matchability, it can't really get much better than that.

Unless of course, if you go by OKC's Q&As, where you have preferences on how others answer the same question. It can be flawed, yes, but chances are if they're a 20% dating match & 10% friend match, they're not going to work out. I once saw the same profile on POF but after reading their OKC Q&A I realized there was no way. A matching algorithm can at least go based on the obvious things enough to make it much better than randomness.
 devolution_zone
Joined: 2/10/2013
Msg: 68
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/14/2013 1:37:19 AM
My experience with okc is that the women in general are more attractive, higher caliber, friendlier and reply WAY more often than here. OKC also has questions that you can use to see if someone is just not a match before ever writing them. No mail filters either, so if a woman has ages 38-45 and you're 46, you won't be f*cked. Basically, OKC gives you _access_ to more people. Access to datable members and number of members is nowhere near the same thing and what I want from from a dating site is access to women I can date, not some misguided exclusionary system designed to tell who I can and can't date built into the software.

"- Fewer women than POF"
Yes, but as I noted, the number of women and the number of women you have access to are not the same thing.

"- Lower % of attractive women than POF"
My experience has been the opposite.

 abmccray
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 69
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Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/14/2013 5:16:52 AM

- Lower % of attractive women than POF


No way this is true.

OKC has an algorithm (or at least -had- one) in that the higher you were rated, the higher rated women would show up in your searches on the site. The reasoning for this is so that the higher rated people wouldn't be spammed and flooded by the lower rated people on the site, as the equivalent happens on here and match. It can skew perception as well, since your search depends on what you are (and I believe new people get worse searches by default). So if you're judging this by being a -new- member, you might be auto-screened from this until you get sufficiently judged to be in a higher range.

Besides that, anecdotal, I just hit "online now" in my area, and there are only FOUR women I'd call anywhere NEAR attractive, and 2 of them have multiple kids (and the other two have no semblance of grammar and spelling in their profiles). 48309 is the location I'm searching from. I'm doing it on OKC now, and I get 10 in the first section of results, with well/decently written profiles and child-free. I don't know -what- area in which pof has "hotter" women, or what judgments you're using (my basic criteria is "fit" and doesn't look like they stepped out of the pages of "people of Walmart").
 NonamousDog
Joined: 4/20/2011
Msg: 70
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/14/2013 8:44:49 AM
@soo-girl,

"I found the OKC forums to be kind of lame,......"

I agree. There are only about a dozen OKC users who post in the OKC forums and too many threads degenerate way too quickly into either circle-jerks or petty arguments.

I don't know if devolution_zone is correct that women on OKC are friendlier, but they do seem to be more inclined to respond. Whether that's out of politeness or friendliness, I don't know.
 HelenBackAgain
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 71
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/14/2013 10:02:45 AM
Interesting study. So we really might as well just go to any random outdoor event, or bar, or what-have-you...

Another here who thought OKC forums were lame.

I resent paying when so many services are free so I'm only familiar with them and POF.

It was easier to find smarter men on OKC, and easier to find nicer ones on POF. I kinda want a fella to be both, soooo... on my return trip, I went with the one that has better forums.
 FitnessGuy33
Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 72
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Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/14/2013 10:27:55 AM
According to a website that I have found, the best one is Match.com.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 73
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/14/2013 1:50:26 PM
"- Fewer women than POF"
Yes, but as I noted, the number of women and the number of women you have access to are not the same thing.

Actually, on OKC they don't have filters, so you'd SEE more women who've been online recently on OKC than POF, by default if they had the same amount of people. But actually, on POF, even with filters, you see MORE.

"- Lower % of attractive women than POF"
My experience has been the opposite.

At least around here in the greater vacinity, it's staunchly a veggie/emo/yoga-Activia/alternative/nerd crowd. Which can be good or bad depending on how you are, since that's a type thing that overlaps into physical attraction too.

When it comes to baseline objective beauty, POF has a somewhat higher % of attractive women (Match being the best), as on OKC requires more scrolling to find. Areas vary of course. I'm sure in particular places it's roughly the same or perhaps a bit better.

OKC has an algorithm (or at least -had- one) in that the higher you were rated, the higher rated women would show up in your searches on the site.

What I'm referring to is a search, manually sorted by last-online. Shorter list than POF, and due to it not being super-duper long unlike POF's, it's easy to gauge. Algorithms have nothing to do with that. It's a search filter, not an algorithm. The algorithm cranks out the girls "like" the one you're viewing, suggestions, quiver matches, meet-me, etc.

So if you're judging this by being a -new- member, you might be auto-screened from this until you get sufficiently judged to be in a higher range.

As a practical joke on there I once made a new account of a crazy funny looking dude and made a really wacky/hilarious profile. The search results were exactly the same, as it's no surprise. Again, a manual search filter, ordered by online date has nothing to do with an algorithm, etc.

I'm doing it on OKC now, and I get 10 in the first section of results, with well/decently written profiles and child-free.

OKC has more intelligent, childless women than over here, yes. Doesn't mean they're (physically) attractive. And I agree, it changes area by area, so one's mileage may vary. But overall women attractive? Less. Not massively less, but a good solid notch down... with the # of active-users running short. Maybe POF with a higher amount of separated/recently-divorced women in their 30s brings more attractive types (which I wouldn't be filtered out of)?

Also as a side note: POF has more older users. OKC seems to have a younger crowd, %-wise.
 GingersnapWA2
Joined: 11/26/2009
Msg: 74
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/14/2013 1:55:05 PM
POF has probably been the most productive for me, as far as number of 'real' contacts made. As others have stated, most folks from other Paid web sites are also on POF.
OK Cupid- I really like the Q &A section of their profiles. It's very helpful for screening purposes. But, The "Quiver" matching feature is totally Useless - It appears the only criteria it uses is location and age.
Eharmony is very restrictive. For example, it doesn't let you lower the age setting; It kept matching me with men Much older than myself (Sorry, but I want someone in my same generation!) None of the men I wrote to responded. Total waste of the one-month fee.
Match.com - Had lots of scammers and inactive profiles.
Zoosk - Almost all of the men who contacted me had very limited English skills, so I assumed they were looking for an easy way to get a green card. Another waste of a one-month membership fee.
 Stubidooo
Joined: 12/30/2012
Msg: 75
Which Dating Websites Have Good Results?
Posted: 2/14/2013 2:06:30 PM
Like many people, I have made the rounds of the more popular dating sites and here I am on POF. Nuf said.
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