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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...      Home login  
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 DevilfromToronto
Joined: 9/23/2012
Msg: 117
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...Page 6 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

Once you realize that non whites are generally the same as whites, once you learn how to discount their skin colour, then you will not be so frequently approached by non-whites, but only by men who want you and who are all men... human men.


I found this statement sooo funny....
when I want to eat only watermelon, how can you ask me to discount lemon's taste and eat it instead ???

will you discount women's ages (even much older than yours), looks, weights...etc because they want you ??
 DevilfromToronto
Joined: 9/23/2012
Msg: 118
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/25/2013 7:30:19 PM
^^^^^
let me tell you....
not all people have the same preferences, just like some people are meat eaters while some vegetarians !!

physical attraction, education, financial background.. etc are important to you, but some people may not consider these as important, they may focus on people's skin colors,
some people may dislike a specific skin color, nothing wrong with that, thats their preferences, their rights !!
LET ME TELL YOU AGAIN.... we all have our own tastes, why not !!???
 GJBrown
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 119
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/25/2013 7:43:10 PM
its not hard for a woman to meet any kind of guy! online or off.
Don't be so picky!
 DevilfromToronto
Joined: 9/23/2012
Msg: 120
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/25/2013 10:39:39 PM
@vashti65


ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL, if you have an attractive, well educated, financially responsible, sane man or woman with strong character and integrity of your ethnicity and an attractive, well educated, financially responsible, sane man or woman with strong character and integrity of a different ethnicity and both were interested in dating you…what would be the deciding factor? Remember, ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL


if "ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL" as specified in your statement, then why did you separate people by their physical attraction, education and financial background ?? since you specified your attractive type by these elements !!

what about those who were born unfortunately without an average face, too poor or not talented enough to finish post secondary school, financially unstable.. etc ?? It doesn't seem you included this type of people as an attractive type !! WHAT DID YOU MEAN BY "ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL" ??!!


Remember, ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL. I venture that some of your responses may be viable reasons as to why the OP is finding it hard to meet white guys.


may I say.... your discrimination on people's poor physical looks, education, finance background... etc makes you hard to leave this pond ??!!
 AquaLinda
Joined: 12/12/2012
Msg: 121
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/25/2013 11:13:01 PM
its not hard for a woman to meet any kind of guy! online or off.
Don't be so picky!

---------------

GJBrown, I beg to differ. When I go out, I never get approached by guys, at least not by the ones I'm interested in. It's funny how guys seem to think that women have such an easy time to meet guys offline. Or is there a man store that I don't know about.
 GJBrown
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 122
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/25/2013 11:16:46 PM
at least not by the ones I'm interested in

like i said
Don't be so picky!
 AquaLinda
Joined: 12/12/2012
Msg: 123
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/25/2013 11:27:01 PM
I'm not that picky GJBrown. I don't need a rich guy, just a guy I'm ATTRACTED to and who is somewhat intelligent. No movie star looks needed at all, just be in shape at the bare minimum.
 Reach_er
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 124
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/25/2013 11:59:52 PM
Hi my name is Wayne and I'm white.There you go, you just met a white guy :)
 DevilfromToronto
Joined: 9/23/2012
Msg: 125
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/26/2013 9:01:05 AM
^^^^ please read back your own msg#135, Vash

when people are having their rights of their preferences, including you (since you had specified yours to be physical attraction, education and financial background, IT SHOWS PEOPLE ARE NOT ALL EQUAL IN YOU, no matter how you defended in your above post), why did you criticize other people but not to yourself (for discrimination)??!!
 ravenhair4u
Joined: 8/13/2011
Msg: 126
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/26/2013 9:52:36 AM
I think a lot of it depends on the area where you are living. Believe it or not, even in this day & age, in some places, interracial dating between white/black is still not accepted.
Families & friends frown on it, & some will be disowned by them if they participate in it. If you're in a more liberal area I think it would be easier, than in a more conservative area. Where that area is, I'm not sure. I didn't read your profile so I don't know where you live, but I have a friend from Detoit & she told me interracial dating is common there.
 DevilfromToronto
Joined: 9/23/2012
Msg: 127
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/26/2013 12:05:22 PM
by the way....


Clearly, I appear to have struck a nerve with you since you felt the need to respond TWICE in separate posts. It was not my intent to offend you, and if I did, I apologize.


you didn't offend me at all, I just felt the need to clarify to you that we are all different and no doubt have our own preferences. Just like me, I have been looking for someone of GREEN skin color, thats my preference, at the same time, I do understand that I am facing the risk that I will end up getting nothing and stay alone in rest of my life
 DevilfromToronto
Joined: 9/23/2012
Msg: 128
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/26/2013 12:30:40 PM

I did not specify MY preferences in the post


look at what you wrote :
ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL, if you have an attractive, well educated, financially responsible, sane man or woman with strong character and integrity of your ethnicity and an attractive, well educated, financially responsible, sane man or woman with strong character and integrity of a different ethnicity and both were interested in dating you…what would be the deciding factor? Remember, ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL


you did clearly describe your desirable type ^^^^, and

you did criticize other's preferences of basing on someone's skin colors, you emphasized twice that "ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL"
 JGirlSD
Joined: 1/25/2013
Msg: 129
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/28/2013 6:27:09 AM

Bottom line, black women who are a good catch and happen to be open to dating white men or any other type of guy does NOT need to change anything about them (whether appearance or personality)...it's more about being in environments that would allow you to encounter whatever type of man you are seeking.


This statement says it all! NO woman or man for that matter, should have to change themselves to attract a date. They just need to be open to dating, not be critical and put themselves in situations where they would be most likely to meet the type of man they are looking for.

Funny...I can't seem to attract white guys either. My philosophy is...THEIR LOSS..
 sphstctedgntlmn
Joined: 7/19/2012
Msg: 130
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/28/2013 10:20:26 AM
It's hard because everyone else wants white men and I don't mean that in a bad way, but every ethnicity of woman could conceivably date a white guy, because that is the most well represented group in Western society. You're attactive and you'll find what you are looking for, just be patient and don't settle.
 SexyKG74
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 131
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Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/29/2013 7:32:29 AM
(Yeah, I kindof have no clue why you'd want to date a white guy simply on race, wouldn't latino or asian be close enough?)

Yes, you are correct...you have no clue...and there really isn't any "reasoning" to your statement.

Different people will be interested in dating people for different reasons...

Now by no means am I saying there are not certain black women who are SO desperate to date a white guy...I've seen some black women who will just be besides themselves if ANY white guy gives them even a little attention...years ago, even had a black female friend who would "drop her panties" for any white guy, even if he treated her for granted and acted as if he only knew her existence when the guy wanted sex. Also know of black women who only want mixed race children and are unmarried with a few kids by different white men who they were WELL aware the man only wanted them for sex. I am NOT that type of woman! While I am attracted to white men, I am not physically attracted to ALL white men...I do not think they are gold...I am not a white man's c*m bucket...or any other man, for that matter. Over the years, I've had 2 white men ask me to have their child...if I was THAT obsessed with a white man/white skin, I would have said yes. I've been in situations where a white guy somehow found out through someone that I had dated white men before...and they thought all they had to do was "show up being a white man"...and I would automatically want to date them...NOT the case. Sorry, "white is not THAT right!"

My situation: While I am CLEARLY a black woman, I come from a very mixed family in terms of ethnic background. Some of my grandparents (I'm NOT talking about great or great-great grandparents) were mixed race. I have many cousins, nieces and nephews who are 1/2 asian, 1/2 hispanic, or 1/2 white as a result of marriages. I did NOT come from a family which dictated "you must date/marry black," nor did they say "black men are bad, stay away from them." I had a very strong, positive father. When it came time for dating, his main concern was did the guy respect me, was the guy articulate, and did he have positive goals in life...skin color and ethnic background was never brought up. Now mind you, my father never dated or married other than a black female. Mom mother has dated white men. I've brought home both white and black men.

I've always been approached by guys of different backgrounds. Even in my youth, my first "real" kiss was from a guy who was Italian-American. I went out on dates with guys of all backgrounds. I dated guys because I found them attractive, had common interests, and they treated me with respect.

Was a late bloomer...lost my virginity when I was of adult age, yet before 21 y/o...to a white guy (Italian/Irish-American) who I was in a relationship with. Never at that time did I say "oh, I can't do this because he's white," nor did I think "YES, YES I'm losing my virginity to someone with white skin!" He was someone I loved at the time, and wanted to share something special with him.

I almost got engaged to a black man around 2002...he was everything I desired in a man. Kind, funny, educated, articulate, didn't believe in having kids out of wedlock, and very goal-oriented/results-driven when it came to his career...and I was able to offer these qualities in return. We picked our rings and had narrowed down our choices for various wedding-related things...but in the end, he wanted a life that I didn't. He wanted to have 6 kids (literally) with the woman staying home. I only wanted 1 or 2 kids and wanted a career (but was very flexible in modifying my career at certain times of my would be children's life). We ended things. When I had the time to step back and really look at the situation, I realized I loved him because we had a history (we attended middle school and high school together...due to our last names, we were always in the same homeroom from the 7th-12th grade). I even realized I was in love with his qualities (for whatever reason, it was rare for me to cross paths with a black man who had ALL of these qualities)...but I actually wasn't in love with HIM. I am so glad we did not marry, as it would have been a major mistake. You want to know the ironic thing about our relationship? I am the only serious relationship he has had with a black woman (about 3 or 4 years after we broke up, he married a white woman)...and he is mine...I haven't had a relationship with a black man since.
 SexyKG74
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 132
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Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/29/2013 3:45:27 PM
(...but I do find even if I go out, white guys are always more afraid to approach black girl)

Hey Kandi in London! It's been a long time since I've been there...

I'm not quite sure how black women are viewed by white men over there, especially since the black people tend to be from different cultural backgrounds...I'm sure mostly not black American women.
The reason why I'm saying this is I've encountered white American men who have dated black women and they actually prefer black women from other countries, as opposed to black American women.

I've also had many white male friends tell me they are least likely to approach a black woman if she is with a large group of black women...this is in a social situation where he doesn't know anyone in the woman's group. Putting race aside, it is intimidating for many guys to approach a particular woman if she's out with all of her girls. So when you add the equation of the fact that he doesn't even know if you would be open to white guys...it makes them hesitate.

I often get approached by white guys when:

-I'm alone

-I'm with a small group of women that includes white women

-I'm with a small group that consists of both men and women, white and black

I've even found when I'm in a social setting especially with white guys where you can totally tell we are just friends yet we are laughing, having a good time...a white guy sitting near our table or near us at the bar is more likely to try to make small talk & flirt with me as well. Often times, black women are stereotyped as an ill-tempered, neck twitching, finger snapping "oh no you didn't type of attitude" hard acting women...white men I know avoid that type of woman like the plague! So when they see you socializing in a mixed crowd, you are viewed as "open-minded" and an "all-around fun type of person." Oh, the negative stereotypes us decent black women experience :(

I'm the type of person who notices every little thing. So if I'm out somewhere, I'm often quick to notice if someone across a crowded room is staring my way. Whenever I've experienced this with a guy and if I think he is attractive, I'll take the initiative to introduce myself. The guy is pleasantly surprised, as I took the load off of him having to approach me...and if I did, it's obvious that I find him attractive...
 spartysbabie
Joined: 11/19/2012
Msg: 133
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/30/2013 7:03:18 AM
I prefer to date white men as well. However my problem is different. Most of the ones i meet have never been with one so they try to have relations with me. You know just to see what it will be like. Its just something you're going to have to deal with unfortunately. You'll meet the right guy eventually .
 SexyKG74
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 134
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Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/30/2013 7:50:03 AM
(Most of the ones i meet have never been with one so they try to have relations with me. You know just to see what it will be like. Its just something you're going to have to deal with unfortunately. You'll meet the right guy eventually.)

To be honest, I think your age has a lot to do with it as well. Unless you encounter a guy in his early 20s who is really mature for his age, many people are still trying to find themselves, figure things out... many people still do things based upon what others think...including their parents. I've even found if a guy in his 20s is still somehow financially dependent upon his parents, it's even more so. I moved to NYC in my mid 20s. I met a white guy in his late 20s who worked on Wall Street...financially, he was doing well for himself. He told me his parents would prefer if he only dated white...but he said he honestly preferred black and latina women. And he specifically said "he pays his bills/owns his apartment/doesn't depend on anyone...so no one has the right to speak for him or dictate who he should like.


If I told you I didn't encounter guys white guys who just wanted to have sex back in my early 20s and unfortunately sometimes now, I wouldn't be telling the truth...I can smell it, and I avoid those guys like the plague! I think EVERYONE should be able to pick out red flags, whether they are dating interracial or not...but I think it's even more important when it comes to black women and white men. We are sometimes looked upon in society as nothing more than a sex object or as some have said "do-able, but not dateable."

I think when it comes to sex with white men, we often have to wait a little longer in comparison to other types of relationships...let them get to know us. It also gives you an opportunity to get to know him and to determine if he is someone who can handle IR dating. As I've said before, I don't feel everyone can handle it or should be in one. Every black female that I have known where she met a white guy and slept with him too soon, it did NOT last...yet I have plenty of white female friends who met a white guy, slept with him by the 3rd or 4th date...and they ended up dating for a year or two...
 TuMuchFun
Joined: 9/29/2008
Msg: 135
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Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/30/2013 8:04:49 AM
I think its hard to find white guys because they (along with the lady's looking for them) are sitting in their offices, homes in front of their computer posting on threads about how hard it is to find each other.
 SexyKG74
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 136
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Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/30/2013 8:15:59 AM
Not all of us..."some of us" are also sending and receiving messages from men who we are actually meeting ;)

If a man really catches my eye and if time permits, I have had initial meets during my lunch break...
 TuMuchFun
Joined: 9/29/2008
Msg: 137
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Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 1/30/2013 8:25:24 AM
^^^ well then it's not hard at all...see
 GJBrown
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 138
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 2/5/2013 6:02:12 PM
Hard to meet white guys? It's not hard for a woman to meet Any kind of guy!
but if all the men that approach you aren't good enough or not the Race you prefer, Just do the approaching yourself!
fot white men try a golf course, Metal concert, or i don't know! anywhere in America!
 CouldBWow
Joined: 11/26/2012
Msg: 139
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 2/5/2013 8:52:07 PM

I was just wondering why it's so hard to meet white guys. White guys is what I happen to prefer and I tried the interracial dating site but black men kept approaching me...(I didn't get that...considering the title of the site and all)....but do anyone know where I'm coming from?


How is anyone supposed to know you are interested in inter-racial dating if you don't mention it in your profile?
 The_Big_Slim
Joined: 5/11/2011
Msg: 140
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 2/5/2013 8:59:52 PM

Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...


Sorry about that, didn't know I was supposed to be meeting you.... let's reschedule ^___^

Seriously though, if you're finding it hard to meet white guys then I'd say try looking elsewhere. Could always be possible where you are, the pickings aren't as good as other places.
 BrownSugar1224
Joined: 2/11/2013
Msg: 141
Why Is It So Hard To Meet White Guys...
Posted: 3/3/2013 2:36:33 PM
Dear Sexi Poet,

I really hope you having more success getting what you want from here. I looked at your profile and it doesn't specify your preference for white men, however mine does not either. I for some reason don't have a problem meeting white men or getting them to respond to my profile, I don't quite know why that is exactly, but in your case you should express your desires. I hope this will help assist you in your search. But be advised that you might get a lot of responses from guys that are looking for only one thing even though their profiles suggest otherwise.

Sincerely,
BrownSugar1224
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