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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys look      Home login  
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 ForumFiona
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 101
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides Page 5 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
^^^ Just another combative flaming post, with flaming pants...and a flaming closet. If you hate women so much, just come out and admit it already. It's ok, most family and friends are very understanding....
 vibrantshe
Joined: 3/21/2011
Msg: 102
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/11/2013 8:52:37 AM
AnnieOchre - Don’t you understand? It’s a Feminist conspiracy. You see the Feminist sent out a memo to all the entitled American women to marry men they don’t love and then divorce them and take all their money.

Apparently the courts on in on it too.

The only way a man can find true love it to get a mail-order bride from a 3rd world country because women in third world countries know their place and don’t have any crazy idea’s about expectations in a relationship.

My only question is why are these guys bothering to be on a date website at all??? Don’t they know women in 3rd world countries don’t have access to the internet?
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 103
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/11/2013 9:41:57 AM
Clearly, there is one party that always comes out ahead in a divorce, it is the lawyer. Lawyers run the USA government, they create the laws, then they profit from the laws they create. They never lose no matter who wins.

But as to the men and women involved, USA laws I think favored women more the UK laws did, at least up to the recent past. Something about in the UK they paid according to the min need of the woman, vs the USA which is 50/50 split, and then you have to provide for children.

Women file from 60-90% of the time. Depending on their economic class.

Naturally since women usually file first, they usually get a lawyer, they are going to be looking to make sure they can survive financially after a divorce. My gut feeling is it is more often a fair settlement, but obviously in some situations the woman or the man will get gutted.

Stats seem to vary about whether either men or women are financially better off after a divorce, and children are a big factor in this. As well as who is making the income in the family. The only 2 women that I personally know, one the husband was a deadbeat loser, the other the woman was clearly at fault and it was very ugly, and not USA based divorce, so what does it really mean? I have two male friends that had gotten divorced, one his wife was a real loser and tried to suck as much money from him as possible, not sure how much she got, it was a long time ago. The other I have no idea, but he did eventually get sole custody of his daugher so there is that.

Lawyers will give advice like the following, which I am sure contributes to a feeling that the man has been played.

Think about the timing of the separation: Is your husband due a bonus or other windfall in the near future? Don’t separate until after it arrives, so it will be community property. Think about Social Security: If you’ve been married nine years, you might want to stick out the last year, so you can collect on your ex’s earnings record. Finally, don’t just pack your bags, load up the kids, and drive away in a car that needs four new tires. Before you separate, buy the clothes you’ll need, perform maintenance on the car, and fix the kids’ teeth.

Very amusing thread, started by a young Asian man, answered by an older Chinese man, with no one other than myself even having met a woman from China.

Second world and third world countries all have access to the Internet.

So far I am the only poster who has dated a Chinese woman from China. Though she lived in Hong Kong, which while Chinese and part of China, Hong Kong is hardly typical of mainland China. She owns her own business, has utube videos advertizing her business, and has a Chinese and USA passport, as well as she is 50 years old. Not really fitting the spirit of the thread.

SE Asia outside of tourist spots is not Westernized at all.
 Rapunzel1964
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 104
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/11/2013 10:17:30 AM
Proteus,

The unfaithful husband in my case certainly came out ahead due to no-fault divorce laws- and he got to the keep the PhD that I put him through school to get, plus all the income that comes with it.
No kids.
We had two houses, he got one and I got the other. I put more money in each than he did, but no-fault divorce does not take that into account. He got the nicer, and more valuable/more equity of the two, due to it's location being closer to his job.

I know that nothing will alter your beliefs.

I will never again marry without a pre-nup.
 timeforall
Joined: 8/26/2012
Msg: 105
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/11/2013 10:19:38 AM
You see the Feminist sent out a memo to all the entitled American women to marry men they don’t love and then divorce them and take all their money.


I don't think this at all. I do think many if not most women do not marry guys they love, but I don't think many of them think in terms of being married for a while, then divorcing the guy and taking his money. Of course that often ends up happening, but that was not the initial game plan. The initial game plan is more along the lines of I am going to be very happy because of type of life this guy is going to provide me. When it turns out that is not enough, that's when the woman starts thinking about divorce. And then a few years after this unhappiness caused by their own creation, they choose to divorce. Happens every day. Part of the problem of course is that many women can never be happy . . its not in their makeup. And then its the unrealized expectations that do them in, even if they started out happy.

^^^^Rapunzal. I am calling you out on this one. If you got nothing from the divorce, its likely because you chose to settle cheap just to get out of the marriage.
 Rapunzel1964
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 106
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/11/2013 10:28:16 AM
I fought very hard to get what I deserve- got a top rated VERY expensive attny.

No- fault divorce laws and community property laws screwed me.

My fault in the situation is not being aware of laws that give no monetary value to me putting another person through 11 years of college while he did not work- no monetary value for me leaving job after job to move for the advantage of his career opportunities and to the detriment of my own.
No value for my fidelity, no penalty for his infidelity.

My fault also lies in putting my efforts into someone else's aspirations, instead of my own. I have learned that lesson.

My spouse got to screw two women at the same time-

Doing the girlfriend while screwing me over- and laughing all the way to the bank. w/ PhD in hand.
 ForumFiona
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 107
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/11/2013 10:45:03 AM
Vibrantshe: Add to the conspiracy that they hate their country and blame it for their problems, so why bring a foreign bride to such a toxic country? Maybe they should stick to more other interesting conspiracies like the Illuminati or something.

Dragonbits: Thanks for your post, I found it interesting and I have a question: Is it the women from outside the tourist spots that want to leave?

There was nothing mentioned in the original post regarding mail order brides. Like, who the hell knows why senior guys are looking for younger chinese ladies? Maybe they like eyeballing them as they walk by because now all they can do is dream and fantasize....

The most common reason for divorce in my area is marrying way too young. Too immature to properly plan and too immature to problem solve - that goes for both genders. I feel for the kids mostly.

Edit for below: Thanks Dragonbits, it kinda answers my question.

I am still surprised this thread didn't get deleted.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 108
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/11/2013 10:47:03 AM
In the more than three decades since the fall of the Khmer Rouge, Cambodia's society has seen vast changes. In traditional Cambodian society, arranged marriages were the norm, divorce was taboo and international marriages were rare.

But attitudes among Cambodia's young are evolving quickly. The wife of bar owner Foucher, Men Soey Leap, says that she doesn't feel bound by Cambodia's male-dominated cultural traditions, and when she disagrees with her husband, she lets him know it.

"If my husband wants me to do this, do this, I say, 'OK, I can do for you,' " she says. "But sometimes, no. I think: some good, some not. I can decide."

Now, the rules say, foreign men who want to marry Cambodian women must be under 50 years old and make more than $2,550 a month.

The phenomenon of older foreign men with younger local women unsettles some Cambodians, including Mu Sochua, a liberal member of parliament, who happens to be married to an American.

"My gut feeling is when I see a difference in age — a very young woman, almost a child, with an older man — in this culture, if he is a foreigner, it's for sure: She is bought," Mu says.

That said, Mu opposes the new rule. She believes the best way to help Khmer women is to educate them and empower them to make more informed choices about marriage.

Critics say the new rule simply serves to reinforce women's traditional powerlessness in choosing a spouse. According to the 2005 Cambodia Demographic and Health Survey, which surveyed nearly 17,000 women across the country, 52 percent of Cambodian women said they did not participate at all in the choice of a husband; 27 percent married a man they had never seen before, or had just met within the past month.

Ou, the human rights activist, says the rule is inconsistent, because it doesn't apply to Cambodian men who can marry women of any nationality, age and income range they like.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Just some interesting notes on the question of getting married in Asia.
 Rapunzel1964
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 109
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/11/2013 10:51:42 AM
Dragonbits,

Very informative post.

Thanks.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 110
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/12/2013 11:00:22 AM

Dragonbits: Thanks for your post, I found it interesting and I have a question: Is it the women from outside the tourist spots that want to leave?


Every country in SE Asia is different. In Thailand they generally think it's the best place on earth to live. Many want to stay there, but if they are in love and their husband (wife) wants to relocate then they will follow him. Some want to leave for personal reasons, like they are tired of constantly feeling obligated to their family. Many just want to travel to other countries but not leave home.

When I was on a local dating site, Thailovelinks, I saw one small group of women, usually very pretty, they were located in foreign countries like say Belgium, wanted to meet men in Belgium, but were on a Thai dating site. This was so odd that I looked at a lot of their profiles, what I figured out was that these were women that went to various countries on a temporary Visa and broke up or were going to break up with their BF/Finance, and were looking for someone else in that country to sponsor their visa or to marry so they could stay.

Philippines I get the feeling many people want to leave, when I lived in WashDC I had dated women that were originally from the Philippines.

China I get the feeling women want to leave. Chinese families abort female fetuses so they can have more sons, the problem is so common there are 20% more male children born than female. There is a shortage of available females in China, and China also has a law that families in urban areas can only have 1 child. So if anyone wants more than 1 child, you almost have to leave. There are large financial penalties for having 2 children. It seems like Chinese culture does not value women highly, so highly educated women that are older than 35 want to leave, as most women get married early. Over 35 is an old maid. But I never dated a woman that lived in mainland China.

In every SE Asian country where I know about the laws, it is against the law for a foreigner to own property, like a home, land or a farm. In Thailand if I lived there with a Thai wife, and we bought a home, it would have to be titled in her name. Not only that, I would have to sign an affidavit that stated any money she used to buy the home has nothing to do with me and I have absolutely no claim to that money. If we are married and she dies, I would have to sell the home within 1 year. What men do in that situation is lease the home for 30 years from their wife, assuming she agrees with that. In the case of men that own a bar, the wife actually owns the bar and the man has supplied the money, they manage it together.

Talking to a British bar owner in Thailand that married a bar girl (loosely a prostitute, but she has a choice to sleep or not to sleep with a customer, and they are often looking for a husband / sponsor.) He was bragging about how he chose her after sleeping with a number of bargirls, she was the best of the lot. It was interesting, he said he keeps his pension out of her site, he wants to keep that money for himself. He resists putting more money into the house they own together, she keeps putting pressure on him to make more improvements. She would prop him up on a scooter and drive him from the bar to their home, he kind of looked like her muppet. Maybe just my view, he looked like about 30 years older than her.

Just guessing, but there are maybe about 30% of men married to women with a greater than 10 years difference in age, rarely at times 40 years. But there are a lot also married to similar aged women. Most work out OK and are happy, some don't work out. Many foreign men marry bargirls, so many that is it common when men talk about their wives, they feel the need to specify they didn't meet her in a bar. Just guessing again, maybe about 30% of marriages with a bargirl work out OK, most don't work out. Most tourist and first time visitors stay in tourist locations, so it's natural that they meet women that are in one way or another looking for a foreign man or selling products to tourists, so they usually speak some English. But the biggest percentage of tourists I see / talk to are older couples, backpackers, couples, etc.

A lot of men that live in a village seem to me to be desperate for conversation with other Western men/women. Often they don't know the local language and even if they do, the conversion is mostly gossip and all about farm issues. Not all the time, but it appears to be common. I see this because I am on a forum located in Thailand that is just about general issues and they spend all day talking about very trivial issues, and they often complain about the lack of intellectual stimulation around their wife’s farm.

In general, if one is a asshat in the USA, it won't work out very well for this person in a foreign country either. A man will likely be able to find a younger woman, if he is an asshat it usually ends up bad for him. Then even have a running joke about the Pattaya flying club, men that jump off of tall buildings in an attempt to fly. Not sure how common suicide really it, but it is a common topic.

My POV, dating in the USA Vs dating in SE Asia, I get 10 times more dates / requests for dates, both online and IRL. Like short men threads on PoF & complaints that women won't date men shorter than 5.xx, I can speculate why, but really, why do I care? Results are what counts.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 111
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/13/2013 9:37:12 AM
Mail order brides, I have no personal knowledge of how this works out as I never dated with an objective to get married, it just wanted to date because it is fun to date.

What I do know about these services is that the USA Gov Visa department requires a spouse to have actually met the person they are getting married to, and they ask questions about how you met. If you met on a mail order bride site, they vastly increase scrutiny that the visa undergoes.

I chatted with a PoF poster that in reality was getting paid to promote mail order brides. He looked like a person that should have had an easy time dating in the USA. He wasn't very successful with dating foreign women, with several failed relationships overseas. Not sure why, I am not sure why so many have trouble dating in the USA.

When I wanted to date someone in another country I got on a dating service that was located within that country and had a lot of local men and women on the site. (The lady in Hong Kong I met on eharmony in early 2010, in late 2010 there was also a sudden increase in Chinese mainland women on eharmony). I would not use a dating site that caters to foreign men looking for some specific nationality / age of woman, I would not use those services regardless of my objective in dating.
 ForumFiona
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 112
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/14/2013 8:54:55 AM
@ Dragonbits:
You have made some really good points, thank you for your posts. I learned quite abit from them, it sounds like you have a lot of experience with the region and culture. And your advice should be taken into consideration by the men who want a Asian bargirl to marry..lol.
 LucidTheory
Joined: 5/29/2012
Msg: 113
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so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/17/2013 8:27:33 PM
Is the other side of this post about why older women don't like or prefer younger Asian guys?
Or why younger Asian guys don't like and prefer older women?

Or do young asian men want young asian women and all the old men got them?
 house_full_of_bullets
Joined: 8/22/2011
Msg: 114
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/18/2013 6:56:04 AM
This thread is going precisely the way I thought it would. Battle lines are clearly drawn on both sides. Nice.

In my case, Asian women have an exotic look, which is appealing but it doesn't mean they're preferred. It just means they are one of the myriad types of women I find intriguing - along with Canadian, American or any other culture you wish to throw out there. And I'm certainly under no illusions that they are all geisha types who live to please their man.

It's pretty stupid to marginalize an entire group based on narrow misconceptions.
 lostsoultoo
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 115
 Bogie_Bacall474
Joined: 1/19/2013
Msg: 116
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/18/2013 7:59:40 AM
"In my case. Asian women have an exotic look..." That is fine, I get that. We're not really talking about one culture that finds another culture "attractive". We're talking about older guys going to other countries to find the young, less sophisticated and less "worldly". My 55 year old brother, for example, lives in Vancouver which is one of the most multi-cultural cities in Canada. He has a myriad of women to date of all cultures yet he chose to go to Manila and marry a 25 year old. While I support what he did even though the rest of my family is up in arms, I do shake my head and say "WTF were you thinking?". So, I will welcome my new sisterinlaw.
 soicat
Joined: 7/16/2012
Msg: 117
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 2/18/2013 10:08:04 AM
Bogie - your brother may as well be invisible at his age in Vancouver. He doesn't have a "myriad of women to date." A guy over 50 there could be forgiven for wondering whether he's a ghost.

But in the Philippines, it's a different story. I defy any unmarried man of any age to spend a month there and not fall in love.

Incidentally, although the Philippines is a poor country, it's never all about the money. There are other qualities some young women there prefer in Western men, everything from appearance to the perception of fidelity. And sometimes money doesn't enter into it at all. I dated a young woman in the Philippines whose family was wealthy, she was an only child, and she had dual citizenship in a country with a better passport than Canada's.

Your family may come around when they meet your brother's new wife. She may not be sophisticated, but she may have many other delightful attributes, including, but not restricted to, the ability to make your brother very happy.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 118
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so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 5/7/2014 11:23:00 AM
As it turns out, you don’t have to go on a “foreign mail order bride” web site to meet foreign women. I just received an initial message (over on OKC) from a 62 year old Chinese woman, who lives right here in my home town. The message was actually in Chinese, I had to translate it . Fairly innocuous, really. This is from her profile:


I am a happy single women. I enjoy every moment in life. I hope to find a kindhearted, responsible, love to travel, love chinese culture and love to teach me English gentleman for a last-long relationship, which will lead to the marriage. I can not speak English right now, but I will try my best to learn it.


And in case you didn’t think she was looking for a husband:


You should message me if
If you are looking for a good wife, please write to me.


What can I say, I really do attract the winners. (smile)
 Peppermint_Petunias
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 119
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so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 5/18/2014 4:45:56 AM

I would be happy with one that was honest and not over weight no matter what race!

Make sure you are what you ask for, first.

If young , slim, American woman went after a pudgy, older man, she would be called a gold-digger, so why think young, slim, Asian women that would want an older, pudgy American male is not?

Want what you want.
Go for what you want.

Good luck having one want you for you and not what you can give her,ESP online.
 ozsealady1
Joined: 6/13/2013
Msg: 120
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 5/19/2014 4:12:07 AM
It is true love.

I know a number of mature Aussie men who have gone to the Philippines, China, Vietnam, Indonesia as examples and within 2 weeks have met, fallen in love with and are arranging marriages with their true love.

As soon as the wedding certificate signatures are dry she is pregnant.
Again obviously true love.

Then sadly her family needs financial assistance, she is pregnant again, he is walking around with a grin from ear to ear.

Everyone is happy....
Then she gets her Australian citizenship and starts bringing her family out.

He is still walking around with a grin from ear to ear.
All true love and everybody happy.


Recently I read in the news a man in his 70's ( I think) was refused a visa to bring his 5th or so wife in from Asia.
The others had mysteriously divorced him once they got their citizenship.

That man has so many coincidences.....

Surely there could not be a pattern????? Or plan??? Could there?


p.s.
A friend of mine just got back from Cambodia.
Apparently there are lots of stunning young Cambodian women who adore American and German men who look and act like Jabba the Hut. Strange that these young women are all wearing the latest fashion, jewellery and use the current model mobile phone and tablet.

Again true love.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 121
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 5/19/2014 5:14:38 AM

I know a number of mature Aussie men who have gone to the Philippines, China, Vietnam, Indonesia as examples and within 2 weeks have met, fallen in love with and are arranging marriages with their true love.


Yet another example of life is not fair.

Aussie men are so lucky, flying to the Philippines is like flying from Washington Dc to SanFran, it's so close they can fly over in 6 hours. I used to see tons of Aussie men in asia.

The only place I can fly that is close and cheap is Mexico.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 122
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 5/19/2014 5:35:49 AM


A friend of mine just got back from Cambodia.
Apparently there are lots of stunning young Cambodian women who adore American and German men who look and act like Jabba the Hut.


Did you know that it's against the law for any foreign man over the age of 50 to marry a Cambodian women?

No exceptions even for Jabba.
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 123
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 5/19/2014 9:35:14 AM
Let me the devil advocate here. So that over the hill Jabba the hut goes to some Asian country to pick up some young hot woman to marry and keep him company.. So he pays for the ticket there and back brings her over and they live together for 5 years or so before she moves on.
If that same guy would like to meet a younger or just a good looking woman here in LA LA land. He would have to wine and dine her and take her places and buy her things. Which would cost four times as much as flying to Cambodia and back and bring someone. If he is lucky she agree to marry him if not he is back to wine and dine another woman.
If she does marry him there is just as good as a chance she would leave him in 5 years or so. So he is back to the same place. This way at list he gets to see another country. If anyone would take the time and look at the many profiles here in SO CALI they would notice that if a woman is even half way decent looking they are looking for guys much younger they are. Its very common to see a woman profile say she is looking for someone 5 years older and 12 years younger.
On ok-cupid its even more common to see that with many looking for 15 years younger with some much younger then 15 years. What is the difference between what men and what women want??? Youth sells and every one chases it. Be it men or women. Men always showed off with power be it hunting money or fame. Women showed off the physical attributes they had. Older men have the power that women want younger women have the physical attributes that men crave.. Now many older women start to get more power as well and guess what they are out looking for.....

Besides why so many women care that men look for younger women???
Are they looking for a chance to point a finger at someone??
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 124
so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 5/19/2014 10:12:04 AM
Looking at the big picture, I have to feel a little sorry for Chinese men. Where is the sympathy for them??

China's one child policy and the use of ultrasound caused many women to abort female babies.

The result has been a huge gender imbalance, with as many as 120-150 men per 100 women. They sometimes live in bachelor villages. You can google bachelor villages. No possible wife in sight.

Then they have to read about poaching of their available women by foreign men. Women likely want to leave because of China's one baby policy, China's lack of support for female advancement, a general lower esteem women are held in Asian societies.

So pity the young Chinese man, they really do have the odds against them.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 125
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so , I have this question all the time , why so many senior guys looking for younger Chinese laides
Posted: 5/19/2014 8:26:04 PM
I imagine a man just looking for younger and hot could for the same price get a call girl or hooker for the evening and not have to marry anyone from any country. Why would someone go to all that trouble of finding an expensive women overseas just to be divorced and paying child support in a few years? If you factor in the cost of even getting to look at them, then going there and getting one, paying all the costs, getting her home and all the paperwork and then getting married and finding she wants her family taken care of...you could pay for many nights with a lovely escort service employee. There is certainly no guarantee that just because you pay for a mail order bride that she's going to be submissive or compatible. A call girl, escort, hooker is paid to act in a way you order them, and no messy child support or family members to bother with.
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