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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > How common is wanting to sleep alone?      Home login  
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 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 51
How common is wanting to sleep alone? Page 3 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Hell for me it would be sleep togher. Nothing better then to have your girl fall asleep next to you or with her head on my arm. There is something about it that makes me feel ohhhhh so good. If later on she moves to the side of the bed its cool. But when we get in bed its nice to lay togher. Its one of the things i liked and miss about being in a relationship.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 52
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 9:04:11 AM
We sleep together, conjoined twins comes to mind, we are so intertwined it is hard to separate limbs.

If I am in Thailand and at her family, we all sleep together, usually my wife on one side and my nephew on the other, with everyone in the same room, on a very thin bed pad on the floor.

When we are together by ourselves we sleep naked, unless of course we are sleeping with a group, then bed clothes.

I have never been in a relationship of any kind that I slept in separate beds, even when I had a three bedroom house. I used to have a water bed because then your legs or arms won't go to sleep from the pressure.

I am not sure it would be a deal breaker to sleep in separate rooms / beds since I have never had that sort of relationship.

I sleep better together, I do snore, which she said took a few days to get used to, but now she sleeps like a log, only her cell phone ringing can wake her up.

Nearly all my life I have been in a relationship, but in the past only 13 years married, so I am also accustomed to sleeping alone 4 days out of 7. When alone, I sometime like to sleep on a leather sofa or easy chair as well as a bed. When I was younger I attached a hammock to the rafters on springs and slept there for a year, it's cool on the bottom and you can look out the window. I had a GF then also, that was a bit challenging, but I was more flexible then. Not long after that was when I got the water bed.
 Stubidooo
Joined: 12/30/2012
Msg: 53
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 9:18:23 AM

If that person has snored like a freight train

I don't snore .. if a woman snored like that, it would be a deal breaker but I've never run into it.

has morning breath etc...........

Keep mints on the night stand.. no idea what the "etc" would be...
 HelenBackAgain
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 54
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 9:28:32 AM

If I am in Thailand and at her family, we all sleep together, usually my wife on one side and my nephew on the other, with everyone in the same room, on a very thin bed pad on the floor.

No one can fault your adaptability, DragonBits! Many Americans would just insist on a hotel no matter how her family might feel about it, rather than deal with that. Well done.

I used to have a water bed because then your legs or arms won't go to sleep from the pressure.

Good idea. Though I have no interest in taking on the care and feeding of a waterbed. I wonder if a good-quality foam mattress will do the same thing... might get one just for myself anyway. The whole "no pressure points" thing is very appealing.
 Whisky_River
Joined: 9/12/2010
Msg: 55
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 10:05:37 AM
My grandparents did sleep in seperate rooms...from when I can recall.
I know of quite a few people who have seperate rooms or that admit to it.

I have never slept in my own bed but many nights with the snoring happening and not wanting to disturb him...by nudging...did end up grabbing my pillow and headed to the couch.
I like to cuddle but for a short time...then need my space...skin on skin can get too clammy...I may wake up and cuddle again.
I don't like to be too warm while I sleep...no heat in my bedroom and can be -10 and the window is cracked...seriously....as long as I am under the goose down comforter.
Since being on my own....I have also gotten into the habit of leaving the T.V. on low...all night.
I live in the country and it has eliminated any noises throughout the night...coyotes...creaks and groans of the house.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 56
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 10:07:30 AM
Here is a amusing web site that rates beds.

http://www.sleeplikethedead.com/mattress-sex.html


No one can fault your adaptability, DragonBits! Many Americans would just insist on a hotel no matter how her family might feel about it, rather than deal with that. Well done.


I was told they have a saying in Thailand, "That which you complain about you get more of."

I don't like hard beds, it seems like every stage the bed gets more hard. My ex had a bad back and she bought a hard mattress, I complained about that for a while, but it's nothing like sleeping on a 1 inch cloth blanket on a floor.

I also like a very hot shower, many places don't have heated water at all, even hotels are usually only warm water, not really hot.

I would like to see my wife try and take a cold shower in Chicago in winter.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 57
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 10:19:47 AM

My grandparents did sleep in seperate rooms...from when I can recall.
I know of quite a few people who have seperate rooms or that admit to it.


My parents slept in the same bed for maybe 35 years, but the last 17 they slept in seperate rooms. After my father had quadruple bypass surgery, he felt like sleeping alone, at first I think he worried about the stitches, then about his heart, and he did snore enough to wake the dead.

But it was always a bit hard for anyone to know what my father was thinking, if he spoke more than 3 sentences in a row it had to be a family emergency. We knew he had to be really upset about something.
 HelenBackAgain
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 58
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 11:06:45 AM
Oh I am so bookmarking that site for mattress shopping... funny AND useful! Thanks!

It looks like a lot of posters have difficulty with just plain not having enough room, which kinda baffles me... you need a king-size, buy a king-size! I realize price can pose a problem but it does not have to cost a king's ransom. As a struggling 20-something, I bought a king-size futon with a couple of layers of foam in it, just for myself (well, and I kinda figured I'd be sharing it at some point). Affordable, comfortable, plenty roomy enough for me and the oversized boyfriend later acquired, and because of the foam, it didn't start to compress for years. Held up really well.

Sure they're out of fashion now, but so what? Still a great option if on a budget. And if this is not a consideration, hey, go nuts, get the bed you've always wanted. Why wait 'til you really need it? The situation will arise eventually... In the meantime, it's fun to have a bed big enough to swim in all by yourself, too. Or, for taller people, just, big enough that you're not forever at the edges one way or another! Very peaceful, with or without a partner.

Along with Stubidooo, I too am considering starting to ask about sleep preferences (in my case, when I do date again)... eh, it may not be necessary though. Seems like the personalities I go for tend to like to sleep close.

Heh. Now I'm sleepy from all this talking about sleep.
 Perspektiv
Joined: 10/31/2012
Msg: 59
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 12:00:09 PM
For me, I love sleeping in the same bed as a partner, as it makes me feel close to them, but that's where it stops for me.

I hate having a partner draped over me all night, and need my own space in bed. I love having deep conversations in bed, cuddling, but when it's time to sleep, sleeping on my own side, and they sleep in theirs. I've never been able to have a partner sleeping on my body or anywhere draped onto me feel comfortable over the course of a night. I'd end up moving away from them during the night, as that's more comfortable to me. I used to think it was a medical issue, with the way I was made to feel like I had a cold heart for being this way, but am perfectly normal. I just love my own independence, even within a relationship.

I think I sleep in bed with a partner, the same way I like my relationships to go. Both are together, it's clear, but both are their own person, and co-exist independently.

I strongly feel, that one of the quickest ways most sabotage relationships while meaning well, is by trying to be too close too often with their partners. It's suffocating, and isn't healthy in the slightest way.

Let them breathe!
 brisco414
Joined: 4/20/2012
Msg: 60
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 6:52:29 PM
Wow -- a lot of preferred solo sleepers. Interesting.

I gotta admit, I don't like sleeping alone but have been doing it for quite a few years. I would much rather share a bed.
 SpanishhhSugarrrr
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 61
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How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 6:59:28 PM
keep ONE leg shaved? does that make u feel like ur sleeping w someone?
 MuskokaLake
Joined: 11/3/2012
Msg: 62
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 7:03:12 PM
well to tell you the truth,,, tell her right off the bat that you like to sleep alone,,, that doesn't mean you cat have fun first and cuddle,,, just be honest
 MuskokaLake
Joined: 11/3/2012
Msg: 63
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 7:06:17 PM
lol,,, not me,,, im with you,,, I hate to sleep alone,,, lol
 kjay41
Joined: 8/19/2012
Msg: 64
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 7:10:08 PM
Bring it up immediately! That needs to be put out there right away
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 65
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 7:12:23 PM
It looks like it's mostly women answering saying they don't want to share a bed with their partner. Here's a question for those women who want to sleep alone:
How do you handle sex with your partner? Does he hop into your bed, or you hop into his bed, go at it and get the deed done, then say to him: We're done, so go back to your bedroom/We're done, so I'm going back to my bedroom"? Do you also complain that men are not romantic and wish your guy would show more romance?
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 66
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How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 8:32:28 PM
"How do you handle sex with your partner? Does he hop into your bed, or you hop into his bed, go at it and get the deed done, then say to him: We're done, so go back to your bedroom/We're done, so I'm going back to my bedroom"? Do you also complain that men are not romantic and wish your guy would show more romance?"

Is that a serious question?

Do people really only have sex in the bedroom? Say it isn't so.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 67
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How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/22/2013 8:53:23 PM
Sleeping alone is all I have ever done as far back as I can remember.
 MsMaggieMay
Joined: 2/2/2013
Msg: 68
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/23/2013 11:59:56 AM
I hate having someone in the same bed with me. It drives me nuts. Sex is great but please go sleep at your own house.
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 69
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/23/2013 3:54:11 PM
Sleeping alone. YES I loved it while I was single, when I was married, I loved sleeping with my late wife. I so missed sleeping with the woman I loved. Now a days, I have fallen in love, and I so love sleeping next to her beautiful body,,
 Zephyr2553
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 70
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/23/2013 10:11:03 PM
Mailman, to answer your question, we would sleep in the same bed but just not joined at the hip...I'm an independent woman and like my space. AND love making love very much! Just because someone doesn't want their sig's legs wrapped around them like an orangatang and don't like the weight of someone's "dead" arm crushing them or doesn't like to feel imprisoned in a body lock doesn't mean they don't greatly enjoy being in the same bed with them.
I sleep with my own blanket wrapped around my body and my head covered up. That's just me. When my man falls asleep and I'm imprisoned in a body lock, I just lay there wide awake wishing I could escape but not wanting to wake them up. That's miserable! Doesn't mean we can't move back together during the night, early in the am or whatever, but my personal space is important to me.
 OC28AV99
Joined: 2/1/2013
Msg: 71
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/24/2013 12:38:21 AM
Personally I don't mind sharing a bed as long as it's a king size and we both have plenty of room. I literally can't sleep if he's touching me, the weight wakes me up. And I don't think it's that uncommon....I think that's why king size beds are so popular!
 Sophy10
Joined: 12/24/2012
Msg: 72
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/24/2013 5:29:35 AM
Absolutely not. Those are grounds for "find someone else" message.
 Sophy10
Joined: 12/24/2012
Msg: 73
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/24/2013 5:32:01 AM
I agree with Jeffrey65802!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 74
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/24/2013 6:37:57 AM
Long ago and far away, at a party, was introduced to this fella who just dazzled me. And vice versa. The chemistry was strong strong and stronger. We'd walled ourselves off from the rest and were literally discussing our far distant future. I happened to mention that I hated king sized beds because I disliked having to make an appointment to touch the person I was sleeping with. He returned the sally with a statement that beds were for forking or sleeping, NOT for cuddling. And with that statement every last drop of chemistry evaporated. Done. Fastest, hottestburning relationship I've ever been in: in/out four hours.
 juliettes7
Joined: 11/4/2012
Msg: 75
How common is wanting to sleep alone?
Posted: 2/24/2013 6:57:14 AM
I have no policy really--had bad sleep in blah relationships and effortless sleep in a good one. No snorers--that would likely kill it. But the space and blanket hog, bad cuddlers or our bodies weren't a comforting fit--seemed indicative of the situation between us. And the ones that can't sleep well-tense. groaning upon waking, irritable--I don't care for. If
it was a good relationship, I might adapt, but it never occurred that anyone had to get twin beds or leave the room. I used to want my own bedroom though just because the other person was messy. I do tend to see it as a gauge of compatibility.
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