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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on      Home login  
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 Seeyousmile383
Joined: 11/6/2012
Msg: 51
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!Page 3 of 17    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17)
Danm capnsteve you hit it right on the money!!!Thats what they are doing,,wanting perfect,big money,things! Yet they are still looking 6 months down the road!!They might have missed out on the best match if they would only try!
 JGirlSD
Joined: 1/25/2013
Msg: 52
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 8:59:17 AM

Danm capnsteve you hit it right on the money!!!Thats what they are doing,,wanting perfect,big money,things! Yet they are still looking 6 months down the road!!They might have missed out on the best match if they would only try!


Generalize much? Negative enough? What about those women who are over a certain age? Or perhaps not model types? Or not ready to jump into bed on the first date? Who are NOT PERFECT? We get left out and ignored just as much as the average guy.

Don't lump all women into the same category! There are many women out there that are just like you, looking for a date, relationship or whatever. There are those who are starting to get judgmental, frustrated and angry...like you...and there are those who just let it go and move on.

The reason I stopped dating was I got tired of being stood up and lied to...but .. I'll be back after a while. It is easier for me to take a break and do good things for me...than to belittle the exact people who I am looking to attract. If I start to feel negativity..I will back off.

Remember Seekinghim316..that for every woman (or man for that matter) who 'plays' hard to get or rejects you or any of the common buzz phrases....there are hundreds more that will respond and will give you the time of day. Just brush off and move on...

also .. women can see your forum posts and most likely will get turned off by your negative and generalizing comments.
 John255317
Joined: 12/28/2012
Msg: 53
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 9:18:05 AM
Our brains here about online dating and think: "wow, this is going to be great, I can look at profiles and read them and I will be able to get exactly what I want!" And then reality sinks in, the brain knows what it wants but just because it does, it isn't automatic as far as finding that one that you are attracted to! Real life meeting someone instead of online is the best way to eliminate all this BS. But like myself and my work, I am not around that environment a lot so online dating it is. I don't think online dating is where men and women are playing hard to get, I think it is just natural that when you don't really know or have met someone yet, it is difficult to figure it all out. And then with that comes accusations from men and women that get pissed when you aren't interested etc etc. Yes, you may be a great person and maybe the perfect match as far as perfect can be but all we have is what is on here. No ones fault other then even though online dating is fairly new, it is kind of archaic in a way. That damn brain of ours!!!
 HelenBackAgain
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 54
why do women play hard to get in online dating? it's a reason you're on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 9:28:17 AM

And then with that comes accusations from men and women that get pissed when you aren't interested etc etc.

This is something I see again and again but never understand.

I have never been angry with someone for somehow mysteriously failing to be interested in the wonder that is me.

Disappointed that my interest wasn't returned, naturally, maybe even sad, but angry? Angry is for when people screw up in ways that affect us, or do bad things... not finding me romantically appealing is not an act of aggression.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 55
why do women play hard to get in online dating? it's a reason you're on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 10:11:20 AM
I hear this a lot, from women especially ones that get a large amount of messages. I know this is online and this is a numbers game,etc but when you get away from the traditional polite way, to approach a women, to me it rubs me the wrong way. Your telling me if a hey says, 'Hey how are you'. Its a automatic delete? You don't see if your physically attracted? Or what his profile says?


Who says you have to be an a ss ho le? Or nasty or mean. Nope. Just different. Also, here's a little secret. Start the conversation in the middle, like you have already been talking to her. Stop the Hi I am Pedro, I live in blah, and like your profile. That stuff gets deleted faster than flushing a dingle berry.

If you start in the middle you hit right on something that they are proud of in their profile that connects to you. A girl I dated, I asked her this. Spain or South America. Which one did she liked better? She had lived in both and was ready to talk. Another one, I didn't ask her anything, but described a date with her in the South of France going from town to town on bicycles. She had recently done that around Lake Como in Italy. I did not say hi, or check my profile, or we may have something in common.
 roadrunner2525
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 56
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 10:27:42 AM
I know that they do play hard to get or as one post said that they aren't playing. They are hard to get. I don't know why they do it though. If I could find the answer to that I would spend four hours of my day pushing vagina's off my face. I would go home at night wanting to read books instead of looking for sex. I would be a very happy man and would be down at the med center every week complaining that they don't cure diseases fast enough to fit my living standards.
 DontAskMe2CarryUrPurse
Joined: 1/22/2013
Msg: 57
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 10:38:30 AM
Some are just "rules girls", use the rules of dating books (including the newer rules of on-line dating) and use them to manipulate men into chasing them. I state in my profile, I don't date those types. CUAO is the first rule, they will know that acronym. Be a Creature Unlike Any Other. But usually their profiles are easy to spot. One smiling photo and a light and airy profile description. Then they do all the typical things, like waiting 24 hours to respond to emails, not communicating on the weekends to appear "busy", not answering their phones, not returning phone calls, etc., etc. So much fun messing with them but it all becomes a silly cat/mouse game and who's playing who and what at that point? Not worth it, in my opinion, no matter how hot or cool they might seem. Hard to establish trust with those types.
 bjkort
Joined: 1/17/2013
Msg: 58
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 11:00:16 AM
Sorry there guy but like one of the girls have already said its not all of us who play hard to get... Know I will tell you that its pretty scary to go on dates. We are trusting someone on a websight....ya dig...lol hope you have better luck.
 sweetblue62
Joined: 2/23/2013
Msg: 59
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 11:21:43 AM
I don't play hard. I have been played by many men on here talking to me for at least two weeks, then arrange a meeting, never show and never talk to me again! So irritating! I hate it, so I deleted my account, stayed away for a while, came back and have NO intentions of meeting anyone, just talk to them and read forums!
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 60
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 11:37:51 AM

Be a Creature Unlike Any Other. But usually their profiles are easy to spot. One smiling photo and a light and airy profile description. Then they do all the typical things, like waiting 24 hours to respond to emails,


Hmm. I know the type. I used to simply call them barbie dolls. They appear and disappear out of Match or even this site. They say things like they want a man that "knows what he wants in life and is financially independent." In other words, they are loaded. Sometimes they would put something in their profiles that was interesting and I send them a message. Sometimes they responded. I didn't care about their games, because I was emailing a ton of women, and if they didn't respond fine, if they did, fine as well. I went out with several and they were just too fvcking shallow to even maintain a conversation. It's like I would be happy to be seen with such goddess.

Give me a roady girl any time. They are as attractive, can carry an awesome conversation, appreciates a good sufferfest on the bike and don't mind getting naked in a parking lot. Hehehe.
 Archangel_07
Joined: 6/21/2010
Msg: 61
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 12:32:06 PM
Don't waste your time with people that play games or hard to get. In other words

Hard to get = Not interested

Making a conversation and good communication skills = Interested

The person that likes you will let you know from jump off
 Shirleynotyou
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 62
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/2/2013 12:55:28 PM
If you are beautiful like me I can do what I want.
 lilui
Joined: 6/28/2012
Msg: 63
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/10/2013 12:28:07 PM
they think that if they are too easy you will move on.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 64
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why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 3/10/2013 12:58:15 PM
lilui,

You mistake being "too easy" with being passionate and showing you are actually alive. No one likes head games. Most of the women on here have said that they don't like head games, so don't play them yourselves. Playing hard to get is a head game.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 66
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why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/17/2013 7:09:49 PM
"Playing hard to get" is a head game. Yet most women will put in their profile that they don't like head games and don't want to play head games, yet they turn right around and do the exact thing they SAY they don't want. No different than most women saying they want a nice guy, but when the nice guy comes calling, they consign him to the friends zone, and go chasing after Mr. Badass. I suppose men just have to remember that whatever a woman says, take it with a grain of salt, and assume she really means the opposite.
 GJBrown
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 67
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/17/2013 9:22:07 PM
^^^^
like when she says No! Stop! it Hurts!
she really means Don't Stop, Faster, Harder!'
haha jk
 WHITEROSEFOREVER
Joined: 3/18/2013
Msg: 68
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/17/2013 9:45:24 PM
sometimes they are no longer interested in a guy they have been to getting to know, but instead of saying, " we are not compatible", they will continue to talk a little longer hoping the guy will get the hint and move on, (some men do not get the hint ...sort of letting them down easy. and sometimes they will string a guy along just in case it does not work out with the one they are starting to get interested in, ( some of you men do the second one also, not just the women)
personally i think, if you do not have any interest in someone, you should tell them as soon as you know...and you always know when you have lost interest
 Anonymous.one
Joined: 1/29/2013
Msg: 69
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/18/2013 5:17:17 PM
Facts: Women have more dangers and concerns than a guy has. Women in general are in more danger to be physically hurt. Online is truly a 'stranger'. There are no connections with family, friends, co-works or anyone. So it is especially dangerous. Everyone warns women to never give out much information, but get a lot from the guy.
I do not know of ONE man killed, raped or harmed by online meetings. But hundreds of women have been. Two last year murdered in this town alone. So, yes, women must be careful. There are many that people simply lie about who they are online. They must be able to be checked out. I you can't see that and understand it I am afraid you will continue to be disappointed.

I have chatted online a few times with someone they seem nice then out of the blue they are horrible., scary, nasty, hateful, vulgar and so forth so, takes time. Takes patience and takes caution.

Has nothing to do with being chased or hard to get.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 70
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/18/2013 5:32:44 PM
I won't dispute that women take more risk in online dating, but there are a number of famous internet murders in which men were the victims.

If they don't allow me to post this link, just go to wikipedia and search on internet homicide.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_homicide
 psytle
Joined: 3/7/2011
Msg: 71
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why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/18/2013 5:46:54 PM

Facts: Women have more dangers and concerns than a guy has. Women in general are in more danger to be physically hurt. Online is truly a 'stranger'. There are no connections with family, friends, co-works or anyone. So it is especially dangerous. Everyone warns women to never give out much information, but get a lot from the guy.
I do not know of ONE man killed, raped or harmed by online meetings. But hundreds of women have been. Two last year murdered in this town alone. So, yes, women must be careful. There are many that people simply lie about who they are online. They must be able to be checked out. I you can't see that and understand it I am afraid you will continue to be disappointed.

I have chatted online a few times with someone they seem nice then out of the blue they are horrible., scary, nasty, hateful, vulgar and so forth so, takes time. Takes patience and takes caution.

Has nothing to do with being chased or hard to get.


I'm not a woman, but I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that the most likely reason a woman ignores a message is because she isn't attracted to the individual sending it, not because she's concerned for her own safety.

I mean, if it were the case that she ignores messages because she's concerned for her own safety, she may as well just not have an online dating profile at all.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 72
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why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/18/2013 8:41:21 PM
GJBrown wrote:


^^^^
like when she says No! Stop! it Hurts!
she really means Don't Stop, Faster, Harder!'
haha jk


The Marquis DeSade would agree whole heartedly with this statement.
 quarked
Joined: 5/23/2008
Msg: 73
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why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/18/2013 11:01:44 PM
Not being interested is not equal to "play[ing] hard to get," OP.
 dahlingdarling
Joined: 5/11/2012
Msg: 74
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why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/18/2013 11:52:48 PM

The Marquis DeSade would agree whole heartedly with this statement.

Likely because he was a sadist so hurting his partner would benefit his sexual inclination. Quite telling it's a male agreement then again it seems when it comes to gals that guys are almost always telling gals what they are (really) saying/doing/thinking/meaning.
 NDTfan
Joined: 6/5/2012
Msg: 75
why do women play hard to get in online dating? its a reason your on here!
Posted: 4/19/2013 5:51:04 AM
I don't understand why so many people jump to conclusions so easily... you really can't win if you're a female on a dating site ( and I say woman because I don't know the man's perspective). Also, I know that not all men are "hims".

If you put up a profile it seems like you:
1. Should be open to "him" or you shouldn't be on the site at all.
2. Shouldn't have anything in the profile that pertains to "him" even if in the next paragraph there's something that disqualifies him, because he'll assume the "looking for male" part is enough for you to have made an unspoken promise to "him".
3. Should message "him" the minute you log on, or you're being a message s***, which makes you the same as a real life s***
4. Should talk to "him" and not the guy with more going for him or you're shallow.
5. Should either pick "him" or you're holding out for perfection
6. Shouldn't ignore "him" or he's going to think you're playing hard to get.

This is all true no matter how many "hims" there are interested in you at the same time. It's IMPOSSIBLE to keep that many "hims" happy. Also, they believe that if you don't do what the "hims" want then it's YOU being selfish for offering something to "him", as if you put your profile up specifically to attract this particular him

It seems like there are more than a few men out there who believe that dating site/women are there for them to pick and choose from... as if it's a catalog and women are obligated to put themselves out there for "him". I'm very wary of men who think like this (because not only are they egocentric) , but they also seem to see women as objects .... here only for "him" and what he wants from her.

The "hims" are the reason why so many women stop replying, and why the block button is used so often. Nobody wants to be dictated to and have the character questioned by perfect strangers.
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