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Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?      Home login  
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 Peppermint_Petunias
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 76
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?Page 4 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
It's all in the delivery and intent op.

I do not find the written word expresses/translates very well until you know someone and their writing style (orgasms organism sarcasm).

I am not attracted to those that brag about anything such as sarcasm/bluntness/sexual this and that either, BUT they can show a bit in a profile and you get it and like it or you don't.

If you dont like it..skee daddle and say next.



 pescando75
Joined: 3/23/2012
Msg: 77
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/1/2013 10:55:43 AM
ksayer1: if you ever say something to this forumite she doesn't like, prepare to have a "fan for life."
This elephant don't forget, apparently.
Good day to you.
 NonamousDog
Joined: 4/20/2011
Msg: 78
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/1/2013 11:49:37 AM
Odd that so many go to such length to defend sarcasticness. Must be important to their self image.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 79
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/1/2013 2:17:25 PM
Ha!
I had to check and see if I used "sarcastic" in my profile!!

Sarcasm is no different than "confidence" to me.....
both can be either a good thing........or a bad thing......depending on the attitude behind it.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 80
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/1/2013 5:52:05 PM
Ohhh noooo......you dident just go there!! :)
 RussArtLover
Joined: 5/13/2010
Msg: 81
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/1/2013 6:31:22 PM
Sarcasm is the lonely chicks way of faking surrender. She wants her white knight to take the plunge but she is still sleeping off the last black knight that played her. She can't really surrender, she isn't there yet. So if you are another black knight you just crush her some more. If you're a white knight get ready to sleigh one MF of a dragon.
 suzyqueii
Joined: 11/11/2012
Msg: 82
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/2/2013 5:29:53 AM
Words are very powerful and everyone needs to be aware of how we use them. I hate being sarcastic but I love being funny and I love laughing.... Maybe try overlooking the initial sarcasm and try to get the know the person?? Give it a go, just once, if they seem to be your type. Just my two cents.
 ksayer1
Joined: 1/1/2013
Msg: 83
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/2/2013 7:32:28 AM
I think maybe the people who ''hate'' sarcasim have been too subjected to it being poorly done.
Or maybe a good sarcastic comment is over their heads so they don't know there is a difference.
I honestly kind of forgot that it can be used to be really mean and hurtfull. I guess i just don't run into very many mean and hurtfull people IRL.
 NonamousDog
Joined: 4/20/2011
Msg: 84
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/4/2013 8:46:06 AM
@briancarnate:

"Odd that you don't have a photo, should we bring that up?"

You did bring it up. How is it relevant to sarcasm? And it being "odd" is strictly your opinion.

Maybe I could ask why you feel a need to have a flag in your photo. Would that be any more relevant to the subject at hand?
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 85
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/6/2013 12:11:46 PM
"Great Minds Discuss Ideas; Average Minds Discuss Events; Small Minds Discuss People."

Too often, Sarcasm is used as a tool for discussing people and their flaws. If a woman can be good at using sarcasm when talking about more abstract ideas, it can be hilarious - if it's used just to pick on other people, it's annoying.

A little sugar goes a lot further than a lot of vinegar, so keep that in mind when you feel sarcasm is the best way to deal with people.
 melodyof_k
Joined: 5/2/2012
Msg: 86
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/10/2013 9:51:14 PM
mainlythere


oh yes...
it would be great for men who resent women to say so upfront.
but they never will...
because they wont get any sex that way.
(is that sarcastic)
whatever...its true.

it would be great if women who held men in general contempt and condescension were not allowed online to give good women a bad name


what?
re read my words please,
it would be great for MEN WHO RESENT WOMEN to say so upfront./////
now.....did I say ALL men? i said those who resent woman.

and yes...i agree that it would also be great if women who hold men in general contempt and condescension would also put that on their profiles.

i hate sarcasm.
if used in moderation...once you know someone personally...and it joking...
its ok.
but on these forums it is used to put people down....
and I dont see it as intelligent...I see it as coming in general from angry and insecure people on forums.
 FatBottomGirI
Joined: 6/28/2011
Msg: 87
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 3/16/2013 11:01:43 PM
Some people are sarcastic naturally. There really isn't anything a person can do about it. Comes as natural as breathing. The other day I was making some pizzas at work and the maintenance director came into the kitchen. He asked "oh you're making pizza?" Without even a thought I replied with "no these are tacos" He busts out laughing of course. But I can't help myself . If sarcasm is not a trait you can enjoy (there are plenty of people that do), then someone like me would not be compatible with you. Not really then end of the world. Just be you and I will just be me. :)
 cammycollinz
Joined: 1/18/2013
Msg: 88
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/26/2013 8:28:15 PM
THIS. I've been wondering this for a long time now. It's so irritating when girls boast about how sarcastic they are. One profile I just read she said "sarcasm is the spice of life". No. It makes you come across very passive and bitter. Thanks so much for posting this.
 adventura
Joined: 7/14/2013
Msg: 89
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/23/2013 8:25:22 AM
Sarcasm is a form of rudeness. Only the person using sarcasm thinks what they say is funny.

The people I have met that are the most sarcastic usually, in the end, expose themselves as angry people. They are usually the ones that do not fight fair when there is a disagreement. Will cross the line quickly and take a small matter to level 10 argument.

I personally skip every profile that proudly states they are sarcastic because what I have learned from dating is people will only reveal a small part of themselves up front and I have to expect that any negative trait they put their profile is a big deal in their lives. So to me sarcastic = ****y.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 90
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/23/2013 11:57:42 AM
This is a great thread, a whole list for the those who enjoy the witty and those who spend a lot of time hating anything sarcastic! There's nothing wrong with being on one side or the other but boy is it a waste of time to try to mix the two. What's fun is that the sarcastic of the bunch get the joke, those who don't get it, never will, and will always be annoyed by it all. Never try to match up with someone who doesn't 'get' you, life is too short to not be loved for being yourself.
 Steam_Engenius
Joined: 8/20/2013
Msg: 91
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/23/2013 12:35:40 PM
One of my favorite movies, "Little Miss Sunshine", summed up sarcasm as the refuge of losers. What I think is that people are confusing wit and sarcasm. There is a difference. The other thing is that some people go too far in their sarcasm and hurt others feelings in the process. For me it's OK to point out life's little faux pas and ironies and have a good laugh, but taking it too far in a malicious way is where I draw the line.

Yes! I read it all the time in the profiles about how sarcastic and clever one is. What I think is all it is is a "monkey see, monkey do" thing on the profiles. If someone reads it on a handful of profiles then they think that's what people are looking for on other profiles, so they add it. Seeing is believing.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 92
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/23/2013 7:39:19 PM
LOL See, this is what I mean. Can't you just not care to be around people with sarcastic wit, no instead they must be losers and not know better LOL how about they just happen to have a much different sense of humor than you and let them be while they let you be? No, we must destroy them, hoping we hurt them with are nasty barbs in our posts because you know, they are mean and deserve it. LOL Truly funny, and eye opening to anyone paying attention.
 motown_cowgirl
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 93
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/24/2013 6:29:43 AM
It's so irritating when girls boast about how sarcastic they are

Almost as "irritating" as posers sneering like Abercrombie twats and taking themselves too seriously while getting all prissy about something they saw on a dating site.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 94
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/24/2013 7:54:42 AM
Sarcasm can work in the right environment... but online is NOT one of them. Sarcasm over the internet comes across as usually angry or bitter, not humorous -- including in these forums. You can 'advertise' sarcasm all you want in your profile, but demonstrating it is an entirely different matter. Save your sarcasm for the real-life date, and you'll be a helluva lot better off. Just because someone doesn't 'get' your joke online doesn't mean they have no sense of humor -- it's all in the delivery -- and delivering it through a text or e-mail is a ROTTEN way to do it.
 motown_cowgirl
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 95
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/24/2013 8:27:25 AM
Sarcasm can work in the right environment... but online is NOT one of them.

that's just your opinion about it, to which you are fully entitled. other people have different opinions, to which they are just as entitled if not more so, especially if it's *their* sarcastic profiles and/or points of view.

meanwhile, no one can force anyone else to pay attention to anything on the internet. so why do you think you're in a position to suggest how anyone should write in order to appeal to *your* sense of humor??? before we know it, i'd be duct taped into a lawn chair and ordered to watch jerry lewis movies because somebody who thinks they're better than me sees incredibly mind-numbing slapstick and forcing other people to do things their way is an object lesson in my own personal journey towards enlightenment.


Just because someone doesn't 'get' your joke online doesn't mean they have no sense of humor -- it's all in the delivery -- and delivering it through a text or e-mail is a ROTTEN way to do it.

this is essentially the same as trying to shame other people into not saying something in a certain way because you didn't appreciate their delivery. and if there's only one thing that's more insufferable than too much sarcasm, it's pushy, demanding nags. look at it this way though, you just found out all you needed to know to go look at another profile. how hard could that be? omg don't hurt yourself moving on to the next pretty face now.
 4ms4me
Joined: 4/24/2010
Msg: 96
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/24/2013 10:11:39 AM

Sarcasm can work in the right environment... but online is NOT one of them.

that's just your opinion about it, to which you are fully entitled. other people have different opinions, to which they are just as entitled if not more so, especially if it's *their* sarcastic profiles and/or points of view.

You are certainly entitled to your opinion, although experts in communication would agree with Danimal and not you. Misunderstandings are most common through text, because it's one-dimensional and people project the tone according to their own experience. Voice is better, because you get both the words and the tone. Best is face-to-face, of course, because you get words, tone and body language. Anything that requires the least bit of interpretation (humor, wit, sarcasm, anger, etc.) is more likely to misinterpreted on a computer screen than any other way.

Everybody probably knows by now I like links, so here's a few:

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/10/07/jobs/07pre.html?_r=2&ex=1349496000&en=f988d525510cf1e0&ei=5090&partner=rssuserland&emc=rss&oref=slogin&
http://www.colorado.edu/conflict/peace/problem/misinter.htm
http://kalimunro.com/wp/articles-info/relationships/article

And, I am witty, not sarcastic. My wit doesn't come across here very well, I'm sure, but I indulge myself anyway, since I find it amusing even if no-one else does.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 97
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/24/2013 10:24:07 AM

Just because someone doesn't 'get' your joke online doesn't mean they have no sense of humor -- it's all in the delivery -- and delivering it through a text or e-mail is a ROTTEN way to do it.


This is essentially the same as trying to shame other people into not saying something in a certain way because you didn't appreciate their delivery. and if there's only one thing that's more insufferable than too much sarcasm, it's pushy, demanding nags.

How people 'translate' humor and sarcasm delivered through ONLINE sources is going to be different for every person out there. People pull stuff out of context seven ways to Sunday. You can't stop it, you can't control it. Only the most arrogant of souls out there think the context the words were typed is the ONLY way it can be translated on the other side. It's not always about humor or sarcasm - it's about humility and the ability to realize people CAN understand words differently. Unless you type something with a (Sarcasm) disclaimer or "<---- that was a joke" kind of marker, people WILL mistake a little bit of online sarcasm as something a lot worse.

It may not happen ALL the time, but when it does - it's hardly the fault of the reader, because they have NO WAY of knowing what the original context was supposed to be - it's just typed words on a screen.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 98
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/24/2013 12:31:17 PM
There's not a damn thing you can do about how someone thinks you come across. On a dating site you are suppose to be yourself, you aren't suppose to fit some formula by someone who may not agree with your way of doing things, just so you can please that person. What good is that going to do you? Be yourself, if someone doesn't like you, doesn't like your profile, then you are doing your job of looking for a match, correctly. You aren't trying to please the masses or someone who wrote a book, you are trying to find a comparable date. A profile is no one's business but theirs and of course the owner of the site who makes the rules. Your personality and sense of humor is most diffidently your own and who in the world cares if some don't like it or you, you aren't trying to attract them. This is a dating site, not the UN.
 4ms4me
Joined: 4/24/2010
Msg: 99
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/24/2013 4:46:52 PM

There's not a damn thing you can do about how someone thinks you come across.

Of course there is. How you come across is all anyone knows about you, and you are entirely in control of that.

On a dating site you are suppose to be yourself, you aren't suppose to fit some formula by someone who may not agree with your way of doing things, just so you can please that person

I don't think that's the point. I think the point is recognizing and adjusting to the venue that one is communicating in so that the *real* person comes across, rather than some version that's been skewed because the writer doesn't understand that communicating in text is not the same as communicating in person. If someone's attempt at a witty profile actually comes across as bitter/angry/****y/whiny/wierd instead of amusing or honest, then they haven't actually presented who they are anyway.

Your personality and sense of humor is most diffidently your own and who in the world cares if some don't like it or you, you aren't trying to attract them.

I don't know about that; how about the girls who have pictures showing lots of skin, who talk about partying and then wonder why guys are hitting on them for NSA sex? Or guys who pose with their expensive toys and hobbies, write about their great job, and then complain that they keep finding golddiggers? I'm sure they think they're presenting their genuine selves, but are they attracting who they want as potential partners? In the same way, if one chooses to ignore the fact that it can be difficult to effectively use some forms of humor - especially sarcasm - in writing because they "want to be themselves", they might be getting people who miss the humor and focus on the wrong things.

Of course, only the profile writer knows if their profile is attracting who they want, and that would be my litmus test of whether the humor was working or not.
 motown_cowgirl
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 100
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 9/25/2013 6:09:41 AM
although experts in communication would agree with Danimal and not you.

"appeals to authority". but that's ok. i'm well aware of the basic foibles of human communication. i'm too lazy to get a link, but I remember something somewhere about another expert theory that says even up to 80% of *verbal* communication can be misunderstood (IME the percentage can be very high), which means that even words, tone & body language don't help some people, lots of times. but that wasn't really my point anyway.




Only the most arrogant of souls out there think the context the words were typed is the ONLY way it can be translated on the other side.

is that what I think???


Unless you type something with a (Sarcasm) disclaimer or "<---- that was a joke" kind of marker, people WILL mistake a little bit of online sarcasm as something a lot worse.

speaking of assuming, i'd probably just go ahead and assume that certain people were irredeemably stupid if they needed that much direction.

"some people will mistake a little bit of online sarcasm as something a lot worse".... alright, i don't really see it as a problem that needs to be solved by anyone else on behalf of the people who assumed a lot worse. on the other hand, maybe they didn't mistake anything but merely have a distaste for sarcasm. again, it's not a problem sarcastic people need to solve on their behalf. in other words, so what. the people who assumed a lot worse and/or who don't like sarcasm are free to leave.


It may not happen ALL the time, but when it does - it's hardly the fault of the reader, because they have NO WAY of knowing what the original context was supposed to be - it's just typed words on a screen.

here is a different kind of example. there was a little antique shop in Maryland that used to put a big sign out on the sidewalk on the weekends, "going all out for a business sale". clever. most people read it as, "going out of business sale".... whose fault was that??

of course it's the fault of the reader. they read the words and then they interpreted them in a certain way when clearly, other interpretations were also available. which one is it?? nobody knows for sure, but they just assumed the worst (although they could be right) and then decided they were mad about it.... two distinct decisions that were entirely theirs alone. "omg I read something sarcastic, now i'm annoyed!" really??? who the fuk cares.
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