Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 126
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?Page 6 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
^^^so who are sarcastic idiots trying to educate??
 aj7125
Joined: 11/28/2014
Msg: 127
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/6/2015 5:01:10 PM
If women think sarcasm is a desirable trait then they are someone I won't be around. But I think people really have the wrong idea on the word. I think many people, men and women really enjoy a personality that is fun and humorous and awesome and they call it sarcasm. But it isn't sarcasm if you are funny, and have a great personality. Sarcasm is when you cut someone down with your "funny, snide remark" and then say you were "just kidding and having fun". That is demeaning and not funny. Huge difference. So for me, when people say they like sarcasm, I think many of them confuse the true definition of the word only.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 128
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/6/2015 5:07:34 PM
I think sarcasm is funny when it isn't directed at someone specifically( public figures and celebrities are excluded). Seinfeld , for example, is well known for making sarcastic remarks about events, experiences, famous people, etc. Those are funny! Just don't mock your present company.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 129
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/6/2015 5:22:47 PM
Oh geeze, yes there are people who use sarcastic comments as a way to slam people and then tell them they were just joking, and no they are not funny to me. There are people with genuine wit who can say things with an accuracy that is amazing, and damn funny. Humor is in the eyes of the beholder, telling other people that they are wrong because you don't like their humor is like telling people who to think is beautiful, if you don't agree, fine, you think you should control what others think, that's a whole didn't thing. If I like good sarcasm, I'm an awful person? LOL Get a grip.

It's funny when people bash and slam those who like one kind of humor, calling those people out and yet there they are, telling people off and calling them names and saying they have something wrong with them....LOL...that's pretty damn funny. If you do not like sarcasm that does not mean that those who do are wrong, and that you can say sarcastic things to them, please tell me you see the irony.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 130
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/6/2015 5:48:09 PM
People have begun to use the words 'sarcastic' or 'sarcasm' too broadly and incorrectly, as if it is just a form of "funny" or "smartazzness" or some employment of "oppositeness". There are 2 or 3 features of sarcasm, but only one thing which defines and differentiates 'sarcasm' from other forms of humor. That's what words are for, to differentiate a concept from other concepts. It doesn't matter what sarcasm may have in common with other forms of humor, and it doesn't matter what other forms it may include or employ...what matters is that the word 'sarcasm' definitively refers to that one quality which it does not share with other forms of humor - That one thing that makes it what it is, apart from the others. This is true with all of the other forms in turn, and it is true of all words...when people don't engage in linguistic abuse, that is, which causes our dictionaries to become too unreliable in some cases when people want to run to a dictionary when it might be a case when that doesn't help.

Sarcasm is specifically and definitively "an aggressive humor (demeaning), including prejudices of sexism and racism for example, among other undesirable things, and is related to higher levels of neuroticism and lower levels of conscientiousness." This is in contrast to, and differentiated from, others as follows -

- Exaggeration/Hyperbole
- Incongruity
- Slapstick
- Parody
- Satire
- Pun
- Irony
- Dry/Deadpan
- High brow/Witty
- Self-deprecation
- Farce
- Affiliative
- Self-enhancing

People who think of themselves as sarcastic...either don't know what they're talking about because the word is being used more and more incorrectly, and they're just referring to a certain "smartazzness" or general "funniness" that they indulge in, while not realizing what 'sarcasm' really means, or, they are indeed sarcastic while not realizing that it's a negative trait. Or maybe they do know that it's a negative, but they just don't care.

Also, making a sarcastic remark now and then is very different than having a personality which is defined by or ruled by being sarcastic. The latter should be considered very uncouth. It would get monotonous, boring, and obnoxious.
 aj7125
Joined: 11/28/2014
Msg: 131
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/6/2015 5:54:36 PM
^^^^^^ Sarcasm to a person is not being "damn funny". Humor and being "damn funny" is not sarcasm if you are not trying to demean a person. You may want to get a grip and understand what that means. If a person is demeaning you, that is sarcasm, they are trying to demean and then all of a sudden if "caught", they will say, "oh, I was just kidding". They weren't kidding, they weren't being damn funny, they were mocking you. If you like that, then that is your deal. Great banter is different then sarcasm.

^^^^^^^^^Msg 142...... That was a great post as far as breaking down the word sarcasm:
"People who think of themselves as sarcastic...either don't know what they're talking about because the word is being used more and more incorrectly, and they're just referring to a certain "smartazzness" or general "funniness" that they indulge in, while not realizing what 'sarcasm' really means, or, they are indeed sarcastic while not realizing that it's a negative trait. Or maybe they do know that it's a negative, but they just don't care."
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 132
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/6/2015 6:04:23 PM
Sarcasm is just a form of irony. I use self deprecating sarcasm often, and sometimes directed at others. It doesn't have to be mean. If you have a co-worker who is known for punctuality, a comment about him being always tardy is sarcasm, but understood to be a backhanded compliment.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 133
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/6/2015 6:36:35 PM

Sarcasm is just a form of irony

No. It isn't. Irony is irony, and sarcasm is sarcasm. Sarcasm can employ some irony, or not, but it is defined by something else.

It doesn't have to be mean

Yes, it does. If it's to be called 'sarcasm'. If it's not mean, then it's not sarcasm, and shouldn't be called 'sarcasm'. What you may be sometimes thinking about is a different kind of humor...and are mislabeling it as 'sarcasm'.

If you have a co-worker who is known for punctuality, a comment about him being always tardy is sarcasm

No. That's not sarcasm. And the problem is people thinking that almost anything is sarcasm or irony...irony, btw, having this same problem - people thinking that almost anything is "ironic".

If a co-worker was always late, and you made a backhanded critical comment about their constant lateness...THAT might be sarcasm. And again, if this is done only occasionally, and appropriately, that's one thing...but making truly sarcastic comments all the time, because it defines your personality, then that is from monotonous inappropriateness and it is obnoxious.
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 134
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/6/2015 8:17:31 PM
All sarcasm is irony; not all irony is sarcasm.

I've heard a lot of good natured sarcasm.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 135
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 12:11:49 AM
someone once said sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. That about says it.
 8inscrew
Joined: 11/17/2014
Msg: 136
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 1:28:55 AM
Sarcasm literally means to consume the flesh.
Holocaust jokes are the lowest form of wit.
Sources: nitwit old English definition.
 8inscrew
Joined: 11/17/2014
Msg: 137
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 2:00:42 AM
Islanders invented bbq.
Dont get me started on slav sout creme.
 Jo van
Joined: 5/23/2009
Msg: 138
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 3:17:40 AM
IMO., there are several 'correct' answers to this question, here are a few:

1/. Because women are just cleverer than men.

2/. Women think stuff????? Who knew..?

3/. When she told you that (your) sarcasm was such a "desirable trait", she was just being sarcastic.

4/. Everyone knows that women don't tell men what they really think.

5/. For the same reason that they think that a handbag being 'reduced' from £4,000 to "just" £3,500, was "a bargain".

6/. Oh 'sarcasm'...?
No, Sorry, I just hate that. I thought you said 'orgasm'.

7/. Why not tell me about ALL of the other things you dislike too..? That'll be fun.

8/. Some women seem to think that a photo of them cuddling a 200lb Rottweiler makes them look "desirable" too. There's no accounting for taste.

9/. So that they can claim that their listing of their body type as "athletic", was just 'sarcasm'.

and finally:
10/. Because making sweeping generalisations about 50% of the entire population, based entirely on gender, is bound to be accurate.
hth
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 139
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 9:37:59 AM
Despite my criticism of running to dictionaries all of the time, this should at least help -

From Wikipedia on Irony:


Verbal irony and sarcasm

A fair amount of confusion has surrounded the issue regarding the relationship between verbal irony and sarcasm.

Fowler's A Dictionary of Modern English Usage states:


Sarcasm does not necessarily involve irony and irony has often no touch of sarcasm.

This suggests that the two concepts are linked but may be considered separately. The OED entry for sarcasm does not mention irony, but the irony entry reads:


A figure of speech in which the intended meaning is the opposite of that expressed by the words used; usually taking the form of sarcasm or ridicule in which laudatory expressions are used to imply condemnation or contempt.

The Encyclopædia Britannica has "Non-literary irony is often called sarcasm"; while the Webster's Dictionary entry is:


Sarcasm: 1 : a sharp and often satirical or ironic utterance designed to cut or give pain. 2 a : a mode of satirical wit depending for its effect on bitter, caustic, and often ironic language that is usually directed against an individual.

Partridge in Usage and Abusage would separate the two forms of speech completely:


Irony must not be confused with sarcasm, which is direct: sarcasm means precisely what it says, but in a sharp, caustic, ... manner.

The psychologist Martin, in The psychology of humour, is quite clear that irony is where "the literal meaning is opposite to the intended"; and sarcasm is "aggressive humor that pokes fun".[14] He has the following examples: For irony he uses the statement "What a nice day" when it is raining. For sarcasm, he cites Winston Churchill, who is supposed to have said, when told by Bessie Braddock that he was drunk, "But I shall be sober in the morning, and you will still be ugly", as being sarcastic, while not saying the opposite of what is intended.

Psychology researchers Lee and Katz (1998) have addressed the issue directly. They found that ridicule is an important aspect of sarcasm, but not of verbal irony in general. By this account, sarcasm is a particular kind of personal criticism leveled against a person or group of persons that incorporates verbal irony. For example, a woman reports to her friend that rather than going to a medical doctor to treat her cancer, she has decided to see a spiritual healer instead. In response her friend says sarcastically, "Oh, brilliant, what an ingenious idea, that's really going to cure you." The friend could have also replied with any number of ironic expressions that should not be labeled as sarcasm exactly, but still have many shared elements with sarcasm.

Most instances of verbal irony are labeled by research subjects as sarcastic, suggesting that the term sarcasm is more widely used than its technical definition suggests it should be (Bryant & Fox Tree, 2002; Gibbs, 2000). Some psycholinguistic theorists (e.g., Gibbs, 2000) suggest that sarcasm ("Great idea!", "I hear they do fine work."), hyperbole ("That's the best idea I have heard in years!"), understatement ("Sure, what the hell, it's only cancer..."), rhetorical questions ("What, does your spirit have cancer?"), double entendre ("I'll bet if you do that, you'll be communing with spirits in no time...") and jocularity ("Get them to fix your bad back while you're at it.") should all be considered forms of verbal irony. The differences between these rhetorical devices (tropes) can be quite subtle and relate to typical emotional reactions of listeners, and the rhetorical goals of the speakers. Regardless of the various ways theorists categorize figurative language types, people in conversation who are attempting to interpret speaker intentions and discourse goals do not generally identify, by name, the kinds of tropes used (Leggitt & Gibbs, 2000).


Then look up wiki on Sarcasm:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarcasm
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 140
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 11:23:01 AM

Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?


We do?

I didn't know that!

When did that start?
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 141
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 3:44:44 PM
Something that is interesting though, btw, which is explained at the wikipedia link on sarcasm, is that in order to understand sarcasm your brain has to be able to do certain things. A particular ability which isn't gifted to everyone, such that one test for higher intelligence can be whether or not a person can consistently "get" true sarcasm.
 NJgirl116
Joined: 7/3/2015
Msg: 142
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 9:07:32 PM
Sarcasm is a nasty passive aggressive behavior. There is intelligent humor but that's a different thing.
 rhinestonesky
Joined: 6/9/2015
Msg: 143
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 9:58:02 PM
I hate sarcasm. I prefer people with no sense of humor or if it's unavoidable then people who tell jokes. I also hate irony. But physical comedy is just hilarious, people sliding, falling down and banging their heads, woohoo, can't beat that humor boy.
 NJgirl116
Joined: 7/3/2015
Msg: 144
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 10:06:35 PM
^^^You're being... sarcastic, right?

I absolutely love Seinfeld with the exception of Kramer. Don't relate to his physical comedy at all.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 145
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/7/2015 10:08:32 PM
And there you go, some of us like it, some of us don't, some of us get it, some of us don't, and some of us like all kinds of things that some of us don't. But it in no way means you are better or they are better, and this whole thing was started just to slam women who like wit, irony and/or sarcasm. That's it, it's just here so those who like to slam people who like something different than some others, can call them names, say they are mean, nasty, whatever makes them feel better about themselves. Otherwise this thread would be about how different humor is and etc., but no, it's about how awful some of us are, inferior, should be put down out of our misery. LOL
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 146
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/8/2015 10:35:20 AM
^ No, not quite...at least for my part. We're not talking about simply having a sense of humor, and we're not talking about having intelligence behind your wit. What we are talking about is the particular kind of "humor" that sarcasm is. As I've explained, whether people realize it or not, sarcasm is specifically about being demeaning and offensive, and disguising it as "humor".

We (or at least me) are talking about what sarcasm really is, not slamming people who like it just because we like different things...if you don't like people being passive aggressive or demeaning or offensive, that is not just a difference between different people's likes and dislikes.
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 147
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/8/2015 11:14:04 AM
Wit, irony, and sarcasm are not the same thing...
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 148
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/8/2015 2:37:46 PM
They are being used as the same, and as a measure of whether your are intelligent or stupid, as a measure of if you are good or awful, as a measure of if you are funny or not...and yes the OP was posting to bash women who don't find him funny. It doesn't matter if you think my humor sucks or I think yours sucks or if we both like each others, it makes nobody better than or less than, it's about not being with people you don't like. No one has to bash someone, just don't be with those people.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 149
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/8/2015 3:48:50 PM
I'm going to start posting that I think that eric summit and daynadaze are both ugly and I think that they're stupid. Always followed with a "giggle giggle". I'm going to post this a couple of times every day. Day after day after day.

Now...if someone "bashes" me for doing that, should that person be negatively criticized for bashing me?
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 150
view profile
History
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 7/8/2015 6:38:14 PM
^^^Do us a favor ... find someone other than "dayna" to put in the same category as "becky" ... she doesn't deserve it!

I would recommend etourdi and "becky" ... now that's a team!!

Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?