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Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?      Home login  
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 ShowboatSupreme
Joined: 11/10/2015
Msg: 164
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?Page 8 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
I don't like raising my voice, so sarcasm is indeed useful.
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 165
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 12/25/2015 3:44:56 PM
Why does anyone think that it is attractive as a constant state of communicating?

It is also a sign of weakness and fear combined.

Unkind in the guise of " can't you take a joke?"

Weak.

But a lot of people were raised in that environment so think that it is love displayed. Not compatible.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 166
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 12/25/2015 7:36:43 PM
Would that be anything like constant (nobody is constantly using sarcasm nor is it someone's form of communication), but anyway, what about constant hate spewing and nasty comments and out right lies and plagiarism and just general intolerance? Can you imagine having to put up with that? That wouldn't be compatible, and yet a lot of people were raised in that environment. Can you imagine. Do you suppose they are weak & fearful too? What should be done for people who are like this?
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 167
certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/25/2015 8:45:00 PM
I don't imagine many women find sarcasm desirable in unattractive men. Unless perhaps she's quite sarcastic herself, then she might enjoy a "partner in crime" but certainly not in the bedroom. its not what we can label a "panty-dropper".
But in an attractive fellow, especially one who takes her into his confidence, sarcasm can build an "us versus them" bond--we're the smart people, everyone else is the butt of our jokes. Mild teasing can be flirtatious, and some might mistake it for sarcasm when its really a test--can a fellow take a ribbing, or can't he? I had a woman try it years back, called her out on it, and she tapped my shoulder and said she only did it as a defense mechanism, that she only treated her friends with it, and just ignored everyone else rather than bother to even be sarcastic
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 168
certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/26/2015 5:13:42 AM
""Teasing: to laugh at and criticize (someone) in a way that is either friendly and playful or cruel and unkind""


Teasing, like sarcasm, can be a family way of interacting and seem like love or perfectly normal and expected to some people.

There is someone for everyone.
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 169
certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/26/2015 6:29:58 AM
I think we have people defining it differently for themselves and not really talking to each other.

Over in Profile Reviews, there was this great profile - don't know if the guy was great, but his profile gave that impression. My review was, "A successful, well rounded guy with a sense of humour? No woman is looking for that." I was being sarcastic, and it was obvious. I was using sarcasm in a complimentary way.

Sarcasm is just a form of irony - I know some disagree with me on this, but I can't think of a single example that isn't irony.
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 170
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Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 12/26/2015 8:46:30 AM
I don't consider sarcasm as a desirable trait ...

I think sarcasm can be fun when used in a witty way but so often that "fun" sarcasm shows up in arguments and that then becomes demeaning. I know, I've experienced it. When I first met the man I speak of, his wit and sarcasm was "cute" and even "fun", but when we disagreed on certain topics, his tone changed and the sarcasm took on a whole different meaning!

I can live without the sarcasm in good times if the trade off is demeaning and ugly when there is a disagreement ... and often, that is indeed the trade off. People who are sarcastic when they first meet someone and are trying to impress them in a good way don't tend to leave the sarcasm behind when there is an earnest disagreement. That sarcasm can then become very hurtful.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 171
certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/26/2015 8:53:24 AM
halftime, I think you're right. But the aim and energy is different. (Sez the daughter of a man who adored irony.) Irony seems to me to be aimed at the self, or the universe. Sarcasm, at another. And sarcasm is intended to hurt, or would if heard by the recipient, and there's more energy behind it. Irony, to me, is gentle, and often funny. Sarcasm is just mean.
 ShowboatSupreme
Joined: 11/10/2015
Msg: 172
Sardonic
Posted: 12/26/2015 9:25:24 AM
Now, sardonic is sarcasm on steroids.

disdainfully or skeptically humorous : derisively mocking
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 173
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certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/26/2015 1:58:16 PM
Really gto, now it's that women will put up with sarcasm if the man is attractive? Just how ridiculous are we women suppose to be.

It doesn't matter if you like or don't like sarcasm, the problem here is the need to bash and make fun of those who happen to be good with sarcasm, because you know, only one side can win. It's ridiculous. Just don't be with someone who acts in a way you don't like, the need to bash them says much more than someone having traits you don't happen to like.

It's like when people go off on those who have charm, as though charmers is only cons who are out to hurt you, use you, take from you, when in fact many charming people are perfecting nice and many people find them attractive (as in their personality, not referring to their looks) and yet some people just have to bash away at good people and tag them with insults.

Now there are those who are sarcastically mean, we see some of that here while they pretend to be saying they don't like sarcasm, but not all who use sarcasm are being mean. Again, it's just a word some have latched onto to insult others.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 174
certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/26/2015 2:49:06 PM
I think we all engage in sarcasm once or a few times in our entire life. but some like to engage in it often. it might even be a testing device--if someone gets a lot of people bothering them for favors and such, they may find repeated sarcasm tests who is really interested in being a friend and who just wants something. sort of like the "ice queen" test.

"Really gto, now it's that women will put up with sarcasm if the man is attractive? Just how ridiculous are we women suppose to be."

>>>well, according to what women post here about complaints in relationships, there's a bit of nonsense they will put up with :) and its not just women, there are guys who will overlook something in order to get what they want. No, not all humans are slaves to an attractive face, but a bunch of us will put up with bad characteristics we wouldn't stand in a friend...in order to get a pleasureable feeling in our "down unders".

after all, while does anyone complain about something they didn't like, that they saw in a profile? b/c the profile is unattractive? naw, they just skip right over that profile to check out the next one. does a woman really care an ugly fellow can't spell? does a man care an unattractive woman is sarcastic?

we get upset when what we want...has a cost we can't stand to pay.
 VeryHappyNewYear2016
Joined: 12/22/2015
Msg: 175
certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/26/2015 3:01:30 PM
I find people who "flirt" to be disingenuous and fake. Being oneself should be enough to be attractive.
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 176
certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/26/2015 4:01:35 PM
Again, I think it comes down to how you define "flirt."

Eye contact, touching an arm, bit of banter.....just don't see anything fake in that.
 VeryHappyNewYear2016
Joined: 12/22/2015
Msg: 177
certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/26/2015 4:56:52 PM

Again, I think it comes down to how you define "flirt."

Eye contact, touching an arm, bit of banter.....just don't see anything fake in that.


If a person is sincerely friendly how wonderful, but if they are merely playing a game, IMO not so wonderful.

We each get to define our own boundaries.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 178
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certainly not in ugly guys?
Posted: 12/26/2015 9:58:24 PM

I think we have people defining it differently for themselves and not really talking to each other.

Over in Profile Reviews, there was this great profile - don't know if the guy was great, but his profile gave that impression. My review was, "A successful, well rounded guy with a sense of humour? No woman is looking for that." I was being sarcastic, and it was obvious. I was using sarcasm in a complimentary way.

Sarcasm is just a form of irony - I know some disagree with me on this, but I can't think of a single example that isn't irony.

And here's a funny thing - that isn't the definition of sarcasm.
 MatrixUnplugging
Joined: 1/19/2016
Msg: 179
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 2/10/2016 1:10:02 PM

In every 3rd profile I look some girl is describing herself is sarcastic. I hope its not like that among older women because then I'd be really disappointed. That's not a good trait! It's annoying, petty, and even as a form of humor its pretty lazy. When someone says they are sarcastic are they expecting something like "Awesome another sarcastic woman! Boy I can't wait to have my every mistake repeated to me in an annoying tone and see other's receive the same treatment!" I guess on this website they will probably get 20 messages from lonely men anyway because of the ratio so I thought I would bring it up in a forum. Find a better way to describe yourself. I would just not write women that describe themselves that way except almost a majority of them do it. If that's something you do you should try to minimize it. It's rude and irritating not a selling point jeez. – anthonyalan


I believe it is the way younger people are brought up today. My mother, Jean, was a highly intelligent woman, insightful and wise, without a scrap of sarcasm in her. My grandmothers, Janet and Margaret, were also intelligent, insightful and wise – and I don’t ever recall a sarcastic remark passing their lips. They didn’t need it. It wasn't necessary for these attractive, feminine women. They had something called personalities. Remember those? They might ‘poke fun’ at you in a gentle, loving way, but there was nothing like what we see with women today.

I blame the totalitarian Left and the mainstream media for this, with their destructive, verbally violent and vicious TV shows, like The Simpsons, where even to watch such a show is like having an acid shower. I cannot believe that such things exist or that humanity allows them. But then again, I don’t do the sarcasm. Like my parents and their parents, I don’t need or want it.

I agree with you, my friend, it is not an attractive trait. It is a massive turn-off for me. I just . . . click and it’s gone.

Best wishes

- Peter
 caballerosiempre
Joined: 12/5/2015
Msg: 180
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 2/10/2016 2:04:57 PM
√√√^^

sure..ipso facto, YOU must be "highly intelligent, witty and wise".

AND, OF COURSE..completely " objective" in your assessment of yourself, of Mummy, and of Grandmummy.

Only someone with high inteligence, such as yourself would know all about the shape-shifting reptiles.. To name only ONE example..
 MatrixUnplugging
Joined: 1/19/2016
Msg: 181
Why do women think sarcasm is a desirable trait?
Posted: 2/10/2016 9:46:49 PM

Only someone with high inteligence [sic], such as yourself would know all about shape-shifting reptiles. -- caballerosiempre


Whatever you think. I won't attack you or throw sarcasm at you. I wish you well with your comments.

Best wishes

- Peter
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