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 AUTHOR
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 61
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Online dating is there a chance?Page 3 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
KatarzynaLuiza wrote:


Ok I don't a see nothin wrong with me not wanting to date twenty some yr old bc it's a kid to me. They still onto sex parting drinking etc I'm past that stage someone who is 40 some to old to have kids with enough said. Unfortunally I'm 5'7 so yeah I need bi taller person I fell very uncomfortable datin person shorter than me just preferences. And yes refuse to drive hr one every weekend winter can get bad in buffalo n if u get into fight n stuff it's not so easy to meet n fix it n u end up going to lot of functions urself or have to cut it short bc he or u have long way home. I just want to see guy bc. For no reason so yeah I am looking for man in my or surrounded counties noting to crazy just preferences n nothing wrong with it


No, nothing wrong with "preferences" unless they start getting in the way of actually finding someone. Just something to think about.
 lilui
Joined: 6/28/2012
Msg: 62
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 3/22/2013 9:26:57 AM
Men in general have no patience to let a relationship grow, other things grow first and they want to get going. I think another reason why things here do not work out well is that people start talking to someone they have never seen, they make a mental image of this person and frequently it is not like that, no matter if the person is beautiful, interesting, charming,the fact is IT IS NOT THAT PERSON YOU HAVE IMAGINED and then things go pear shapped. If you meet someone ina bar, you see him or her before you talk to this person and Im not only talking about looks, but about all the non verbal signs that you get when talking to someone, all this is missing online and when you meet frequently is a let down.
What would work would probably be start from the begining with that real person, accepting her or him as they really are and see if there is a possibility of love growing, as it is known, love will make anybody acceptable, beautiful, unique. But most people do not give a chance when there is a possibility, ( im talking of having a possibility in the first place, a spark, something between them), they just think- ah, there is plenty of fish (kkkkk) and i dont like something about this person, the hair colour, the way he walks, the lack of hair or too much hair,this has nothing to do with shared values. Certainly I knew when there was NO possibilities between a man and me and said so, but most of the time there is something about someone who would appeal to you.
 charliesmom21
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 63
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 3/22/2013 12:20:19 PM
+1 Lilui.. i agree.. let a relationship grow.. stop pushing!!and the mental image is also a great point, Some many men get a visual of the perfect woman in their mind and every meeting or most of them will be a huge let down because no one can live up to that kind of perfection,. Well written!!
 monocryl
Joined: 3/4/2013
Msg: 64
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 3/22/2013 2:13:19 PM
The short answer is yes, there is a chance.

Maybe this site really is for hookups, but there are enough naive people on here who do think it's for dating. All the men I've met from this site are under the illusion that it's a dating site :-) Sometimes you can't tell from a profile - a lot of players present themselves as "hopeless romantics" - but after a few messages it's pretty easy to tell.
 onebadmomma
Joined: 3/9/2013
Msg: 65
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 3/22/2013 2:43:04 PM
Def agree with the post above all these men claim to be hopeless romantics..yeah right just chop that romantic part right off and their just plain old hopeless. No its not every guy on here, I don't want anyone being offended. But from what I have heard some of these woman are worse.
 ryuoki
Joined: 3/13/2013
Msg: 66
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 3/22/2013 3:37:07 PM
Stop the feminism. Not all men are here for hook ups (saying it because people may not have read the other 70 some odd posts). And women can be just as guilty as men for the same thing. The first date can usually tell you that, in how eager they are to start touching. I for one show plenty of patience. Sometimes to a fault. Sometimes it is the women who are impatient. So many of you women loosely throw around

( im talking of having a possibility in the first place, a spark, something between them)
. You cannot seriously tell these things from a profile. This is the internet and digital age. Pictures can be altered, facts can be stretched or falsified. You also should not set such impossibly high standards for what you are looking for then basically claim you cannot find what you are looking for.

Stop imagining a perfect man and find a good enough man (same goes for the men). In the end all we do is settle. It is after all called 'settling down' for a reason. Drop your walls and defenses and start looking for what is really there. I know I am not the best looking guy, always been this way. This is why I am practically capable of doing anything. I had the time to learn and gain the experience. I have a lot to bring into a relationship but most ladies on this site are too stuck on looks. I doubt seriously one hot lady or guy has actually dated someone that would be rated 'beneath' them from this site. The 'out of league' people in a relationship met in person and grew the relationship. Stop looking for sparks and fireworks and you will find a decent person that will make you happy. Happiness is what we make it, not what the other person makes for us. I am not going to pander to anyone, just stating where everyone is going wrong in their search for the perfect fish. Lower your standards a bit or compromise somehow.

Also ladies, don't even begin to imagine exclusivity after a few dates. If the guy doesn't contact you anymore he may have lost interest. Maybe he was just looking to get laid and played you all this time and feels he wasted his time. Good for you for not putting out. Those guys deserve the blue balls. Just stop putting all your eggs in one basket and do like the momma from the song says "you better shop around". You can sort of window shop here but you will not know of a good fit till you take them off the site.

Also,

All the men I've met from this site are under the illusion that it's a dating site
. Are you just here to hook up?
 monocryl
Joined: 3/4/2013
Msg: 67
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 3/22/2013 4:02:24 PM
Are you just here to hook up?


ryuoki,

It's called a joke. Some of us use them to lighten up the ever so serious atmosphere. My point was that if you want to find people who are sincerely interested in dating with the possibility of a relationship, you will find them (I have). What I'm here for is beside the point, although I thought it would be clear it's *not* a hookup.
 ryuoki
Joined: 3/13/2013
Msg: 68
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 3/22/2013 4:12:51 PM
Sorry I apparently misinterpreted the tone of text. I will listen better next time.
 onebadmomma
Joined: 3/9/2013
Msg: 69
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 3/23/2013 5:59:11 PM
Point in case chatting with this guy for a couple days his profile says single and then he tells me he is in the process of a divorce....hello really!?! No where in his profile did it say anything like that..I guess I should be happy he was finally honest
 lilui
Joined: 6/28/2012
Msg: 70
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/5/2013 12:31:01 PM
It has just happened again. It goes like that- guy sees my pics, gets interested, emails me,says he loved my pics, I answer that I saw his profile, we could talk. He then asks for my phone, I wait a bit to give my phone, so we continue to talk, befriend each other on Facebook, to send pics to each other, to get to know each other. This one told me I was the woman he was looking for, he wanted to meet me immediately but as Im away from my country I could not. However, he told me he would wait, we talked on cam , we send each other emails, pics and songs. Easter time he said he was busy in work and disappeared. I went to his page in Facebook and discovered a woman saying to him that she was counting the days...for what? and only 5 days were left. I realized he was going to meet her in other state. Well, of course there was no word from him for three or four days, after that an email saying he was looking forward to seeing me and after that another bout of silence. I then wrote to the woman and it seems that yes, he was deceiveing us both. Now I got a friend and he lost both women, me and the other.
 jlynn1955
Joined: 8/24/2012
Msg: 72
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History
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/6/2013 3:20:46 PM
My brother met a woman online (I dont know what site). They have been together over 2 years now. She is very very wonderful. Attractive, slim and trim, active, intelligent, and so much more. We all love her to death. In fact I told my brother if they ever break up he's out of the family and she is in. Can't tell you how much my whole family loves her. They got engaged a couple of months ago. My brother is an attractive man. He is intelligent. has a good job, etc.. so yes, there is a chance....

My (then) husband went online when he decided he was not happy. He also found someone, which is why he is now my ex. They are engaged though she lives hundreds of miles away and they have only been face to face twice. She is moving here in a few months to marry my ex. Of course, in this case she is an embicile because she only knows what he's told her..and he doesn't have a close relationship with honesty. I'm pretty sure he has not told her about the times he has given me "booty calls", with the last call being last week. But hey, not my prob. Hmmm, maybe this one wasn't a good example.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 73
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Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/6/2013 3:35:14 PM
^^^Is your brother Brad Pitt? BC for all us normal guys, the women won't give us the time of day online.
 wolftxusa66
Joined: 3/13/2013
Msg: 74
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/6/2013 3:50:05 PM
You don't have to be Brad, just say
What gives a girl delight.
I may not get the time of day,
Instead get time of night.

If you ignite some passion here
The girl might be enchanted.
You meet her for a glass of beer
Or some red wine decanted.

Be funny, witty, be yourself.
Unless she is a nun,
She might just pick you off the shelf.
Yes, dating can be fun.
 HelenBackAgain
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 75
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/6/2013 3:54:41 PM

Hmmm, maybe this one wasn't a good example.



My ex did the same thing. We don't have ties - weren't married, no kids, so there's no need for contact - thus, I don't know if the woman's still seeing him, and I sure wish he'd bothered to break up with me first.

But he did succeed in online dating!
 jlynn1955
Joined: 8/24/2012
Msg: 76
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History
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/6/2013 4:44:55 PM
LOL-no..he is not Brad Pitt. He is an attractive guy but I'm not sure he's more than "normally" attractive. He's tall, intelligent, usually keeps himself in good shape physically. He can be funny (well not to me..but maybe to others). He has lots of self-confidence. Lots of varied interests. Personally, I think he's a PITA-but that's probably just me.

Helen-LOL. We don't really have ties either. No kids. Just pets, but that doesn't really tie us together. We live in the same very small town so hard to totally avoid him. We both work on the same campus too. But he's determined to be "friends" although he doesnt usually mean FWB. LOL-yeah he succeeded in online dating. I wouldnt say the same for her though. I think that even if he wasnt like what I know he's like, I wonder who in their right mind gets engaged to a guy you've seen twice. You give up family, friends etc to move hundreds of miles away to a completely different kind of place to be the 4th wife of this man you really do not know at all?
I call her #4.--I'm just evil that way.
 Schatzi2015
Joined: 3/3/2013
Msg: 77
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/6/2013 5:16:37 PM
online dating is HARD. Its like going to a disco, someone always likes you...but you have to be noticed by him first.
There are tons of women and men on here competing for the attention of the same person.
You must upload pictures and be detailed in what you want. Men can't guess what you want.
Don't talk or text to much endlessly on the telephone, before meeting... that gets boring fast and you will end up in the friend zone.
I had 2 relationships from POF and quite a few interesting meet ups/ dates.
It can work, but you have to have some patience. Rome wasn't built in one day or even 3 months.... It takes time.
 Purple_wings
Joined: 1/13/2012
Msg: 78
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/6/2013 10:10:41 PM
I guess I am not alone here.. Everyone experienced the same :(
 Imagineour
Joined: 1/6/2013
Msg: 79
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/7/2013 8:17:22 AM
Exactly stop the feminism. Men are the go getters and provide the desired reality of women. They typically wait for a suitable mate to share the rest of their lives with.
When men or a man steps up and is willing to provide that for them and starts taking the steps the women say oh you are rushing! I need my space, I am not ready to settle down yet when they state or even state they are tired of games and want to settle down. Seriously saying its men being to pushy is not sensible. Ok in uncommon cases
Men might go straight for marriage...guess what women too. The difference is the man will actually follow through and women won't.

Oh and saying men want a "perfect woman" all I see on here from men is I am a nice guy and just want someone. To see that and give me a chance.
Let me direct you to a lot of profiles of your sisters with a staunch list of demands "I will not settle for less" must be taller than me in heels,
Have his that "be a true gentlemen". There is a term for this because it is so frequent. It is called "Princess syndrome."
Trying to flip it and saying it is the men who are like this is wrong. The men want hookups dating and NSA. The women play the hopeless romantic role
And feel every little accolade from a man will be met.
 MarkKCurry
Joined: 12/21/2008
Msg: 80
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/7/2013 8:56:23 AM
online dating is for crazy people.. its for people who want to cheat.. try dating in real life.. see wha you want with your eyes.. and go for it.. NOW!
 MS.ICENI
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 81
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/8/2013 12:47:10 PM
@MarkKCurry
If online dating is for "crazy" people (your word) then why are you on here looking for a relationship? "try dating in real life.. see wha you want with your eyes.. and go for it.. NOW!"
 MarkKCurry
Joined: 12/21/2008
Msg: 82
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/8/2013 6:20:43 PM
I am looking for a relationship.. thing is.. its hard to find real women..
 GJBrown
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 83
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/8/2013 6:56:39 PM
"Online dating is there a chance?"
Yes there is a big chance for Frustration!
 BrookeAda
Joined: 1/11/2013
Msg: 84
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/10/2013 6:32:09 AM

"Online dating is there a chance?"
Yes there is a big chance for Frustration!


Halleluiah . A precise summation of my experiences. Online dating equates to disposable relationships. Both sexes using the others for what they need at the moment , dumping them without a word the next moment.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 85
Online dating is there a chance?
Posted: 4/10/2013 6:36:55 AM

online dating is for crazy people..


Really? I must be then crazy. Actually the lady I have been going out for 7 months I met over here. I wasn't even using this site. Send a message to one, one responded. Isn't that crazy!!
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