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 Strings6
Joined: 7/14/2007
Msg: 26
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Men who have no childern after 50Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
As a 52 year old man with no children i get the attitude that something is wrong with me all the time...but thats ok,my weekeneds are not spent traveling to the ex's house to get my kids to spend a few hours with them.I'm not pulling my hair out trying to figure out how i'm going to pay my child support for the child i only spend weekends with.I'm not faced with the fact that another man is spending more time with the children i only see on weekends and can barely afford child support for. I'm not wondering how i am going to deal with the endless drama that comes with broken homes....i'm ok with the attitudes and judgements from the people involved in these things,my calm,easy going,relatively drama free life allows me to tolerate it just fine.I saw the wreckage all around me and decided it wasn't for me.
 Pangaean
Joined: 1/9/2013
Msg: 27
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/5/2013 4:05:55 PM

Pangaean ... what else do I have to go on besides my personal experience? ~ phoenix_55


There's much that you can 'go on' beyond your own personal experience. I mean, come on.

charliesmom21 seems to conveniently provide an example concerning their own apparent interpretation, belief or projection about my internal emotional state.
In other words, 'personal experiences' can be limited, imaginary, self-delusional, biased, myth-based, and otherwise false, etc..

A 7+ billion-and-counting human population is a red flag. We are in overshoot.

Solidarity with the childless men and women.
 charliesmom21
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 28
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/5/2013 4:15:29 PM
This had nothing what so ever to do with you personally. My statements were about the men I personally dated and we both found it difficult to date because of our vastly different life experiences. I think it must be nice to have all that freedom and no responsibility to anyone but yourself. It also creates vastly different life experiences. I can just drop everything and fly to Europe as I did before having kids. My money is spent mainly of them, not me or vacations etc. It was for those reasons I found it difficult to date men without children. They were great men, in fact one is still one of my closest friends. He is 55 now, never married, no kiddos. So no offense towards you or any man who is child free..
 rgvmale
Joined: 7/29/2007
Msg: 29
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/5/2013 4:57:47 PM
Lol, I best all of you will be singing a different tune when all your kids are grown up and have more free time, who knows?

I don't think any of the ladies have an issue with "being 50 and no kids" but more of an issue with the other person not having kids themselves and knowing what it is like. Can happen at any age group really..Either way I imagine at 50 a man could have a lot of options of women where the kids are out of the nest.
 charliesmom21
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 30
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/5/2013 5:08:07 PM
And that is exactly the point^^^ They have choices so do we.. That is why I addressed Pagaean.. he has a right to pick and choose to date whom ever he chooses or does not choose. The OP posed a question and many of us answered with our personal preferences. As for your remark, even after the children are grown and out of the house, they still come home from time to time, maybe to visit, sometime to live after college so parenting never truly ends and it does make a difference. I am not saying its impossible, but since we all have choices, mine would be to try and find someone with a more similar understanding and experience. Again, no offense to the single childless man.
 Happy_gal2013
Joined: 12/30/2012
Msg: 31
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/5/2013 5:58:32 PM
I know a guy that is 64 years old with a 4 year old. He can't get a date because the kid clings to her dad. Know one wants to watch the kid so he can even go on a date. The kid screams her head off when dads not around. He's a good guy, but he has a lot of responsibilities. I have no interest in raising another kid that young.
 1388SmartBlonde
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 32
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/5/2013 6:07:18 PM
I look more at how long their relationship was than whether or not they have children. Under 10 years at our age is a red flag to me. If a man has lost a child, I would want to know what he means by that...having one die of illness or accident is entirely different than one who died of abuse or neglect or was taken away by the courts.
 Hogtownboy
Joined: 2/2/2008
Msg: 33
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/5/2013 11:48:01 PM
[having one die of illness or accident is entirely different than one who died of abuse or neglect or was taken away by the courts.]

I am more concern about how to talk about child who have died. When to reveal and other issues.

I doubt guys that have had children removed by the courts called it lost.

How course I may be wrong as many of the post have surprised me
 Giggles10000
Joined: 2/17/2013
Msg: 34
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/6/2013 1:16:51 AM
OP, sorry for the way some are approaching this--I know your pain--you want to tell about your child but you know --you can almost see it in their eyes when you do--while you might view their life as wonderful and a triumph most people equate it back to how they would deal with it and want to play 20 questions about who, what, when, and how vs just accepting the fact that the child is not longer there.

If you burden someone with all the details it is to much and not enough makes you seem cold or hiding something.

I am very sorry for your loss; however, lets back up a moment. It doesn't matter what most or almost all women care about men with no children after 50--it only matters what the one person you find you want in your life, so stop trying to *FIT the mold of what the majority want in life--enjoy being an individual with a unique life that hopefully has made you a better person with more depth and meaning for the path you have walked, I know it has me and so I don't look to maximize my online experience --what good would a bunch of people liking me do--when I only want one.
 Blah_User_Name
Joined: 8/27/2011
Msg: 35
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/8/2013 9:29:45 AM

As a 52 year old man with no children i get the attitude that something is wrong with me all the time...but thats ok,my weekeneds are not spent traveling to the ex's house to get my kids to spend a few hours with them.I'm not pulling my hair out trying to figure out how i'm going to pay my child support for the child i only spend weekends with.I'm not faced with the fact that another man is spending more time with the children i only see on weekends and can barely afford child support for. I'm not wondering how i am going to deal with the endless drama that comes with broken homes....i'm ok with the attitudes and judgements from the people involved in these things,my calm,easy going,relatively drama free life allows me to tolerate it just fine.I saw the wreckage all around me and decided it wasn't for me.


Odd and ironic that one who comments about the judgement of others, makes vast sweeping judgement of his own about those with children. My life is calm, easy going, and relatively drama free too - and has none of the issues you were mentioning despite me being a sole parent.
 knightofhonour
Joined: 3/4/2013
Msg: 36
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/8/2013 4:44:00 PM
How about the simple fact that my short marriage never brought children , and although i have always wanted them i ended up in a very long relationship with someone who couldn't have any more .

when i ended that relationship i felt too old to have children.
 charliesmom21
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 37
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/8/2013 4:58:41 PM
Import.. I agree.. my life has little to no drama in spite of being a single parent for many years. Mine are teenagers now and my house is quiet most of the time these days. I usually prefer to date men with similar life experiences. I have made exceptions to that rule and the relationships did not work out well. Sometimes its easier to date other single parents when the children are young. As they grow its becomes less important, however, they will be part of my life forever and any man I might be involved with for the long term would have to accept that, as I would accept his children being important in his life. I raised my alone and don't want to raise anymore now. I am in a good stage now and do not want to go back so dating a man with very young children is not something I would be interested in doing now either.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 38
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Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/9/2013 12:36:30 AM
I had a relationship with an older, childless man and he HATED the fact that I loved my only child. He had to go....for that and a few other reasons......
 Strings6
Joined: 7/14/2007
Msg: 39
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Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/9/2013 5:02:35 PM
Import from the UK,you are criticising my personal experience with your personal experience....how much sense does that make ? I never knew you existed until now so how was your personal situation supposed to affect what i said ?

The title of the thread is not men and women with no children after 50,but men without children after 50 and should they be veiwed with suspician..with this built in judgement in the title is it not expected that some men will disagree and provide personal evidence as well ?
 Hogtownboy
Joined: 2/2/2008
Msg: 40
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/10/2013 6:32:57 AM
Thanks, you got it, so few do.
Just wish they was a radio button that allows the option. As you can see from some of the responses many women do see it as a negitive
 vibrantshe
Joined: 3/21/2011
Msg: 41
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/10/2013 2:25:25 PM
My experience with dating men who haven’t had any children is that I just don’t seem to be able to relate to them. Sorry, but they just don’t seem somehow, grown up not have that (parenthood) experience. At least the men I have met seem to be very fearful of women with children. As if we are looking for a “Daddy” for our kids. Personally, all the single parents I know (both single moms and single dads) are perfectly able and content raising their kids. We are complete families even if we are doing it on our own or share with an ex. I’m sure many men without children are fine people but just not for me. I guess I don’t “get “them and they don’t “get” me.
 Bogie_Bacall474
Joined: 1/19/2013
Msg: 42
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/10/2013 2:55:16 PM
I just don't know why this is an issue, the majority of those over 50 have children that are adults, many have grandchildren. I have a grown son and grandchildren so to me it makes no difference if my date has never had children. I don't particularly want to date someone with children at home, my preference. So someone who never had children would be fine by me and I would think fine by most who have adult children. We are more than just a parent so what is so hard to "get".

Totally different maybe if you still have kids at home.
 DivineBovine
Joined: 5/13/2005
Msg: 43
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Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/10/2013 3:31:46 PM

We are more than just a parent so what is so hard to "get".


this! exactly this... i am NOT just my broken uterus and i don't think a functioning one would make me any better, or less, of a partner to a man with a child.

just as a man with a child who died, or one that lived to give him grandchildren, is so much more than just a parent.

we are the sum of all our parts, thoughts, and actions of which being - or not being - a parent, is one.
 Jennywillwin
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 44
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Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 3/10/2013 4:21:11 PM
As someone else previously stated, there isn't a size fits all answer.


I prefer someone who doesn't have kids but if they do have them, the older they are, the better. I had one child, she's married and has her own life. I don't believe it's a Red Flag if they are fatherless. If they have never had a relationship, now that would definitely be a Red Flag.


A girlfriend of mine who is in her 40's is looking for a family man with young kids, she has 2 young boys of her own. She doesn't want to date a man with no children.


Two very different examples.
 Dinno76
Joined: 10/28/2015
Msg: 45
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 11/24/2015 10:22:14 AM
There is nothing wrong with a man not wanting to ever get married or have children.
 Iredurbio2
Joined: 4/18/2013
Msg: 46
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Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 11/25/2015 12:03:49 AM
These heavily critical and extremely judgmental people were kicking
these guys around a couple of years ago.
 TrvstInKarma
Joined: 9/1/2015
Msg: 47
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 11/25/2015 6:53:45 AM
I prefer men who already have kids and already had he marriage experience, because I don't want either one again. Marriage maybe, but certainly no more kids. If a guy my age or older has never been married, I'd be very wary about that. Fair or not, it just feels to me like something is off.
 Rapunzel2016
Joined: 11/22/2015
Msg: 48
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 11/25/2015 2:39:37 PM

If a guy my age or older has never been married, I'd be very wary about that. Fair or not, it just feels to me like something is off.


If a (wo)man is a certain age & has never lived w/ a romantic partner OR married them, they would hardly be serious relationship material.

They may be a great person, a kind person, a loyal friend, but just not LONG TERM relationship material.
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 49
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 11/25/2015 6:22:35 PM
I am rapidly approaching 50 y.o. and will very likely still be childless when I reach that cool milestone.
My technique to console myself has primarily been exotic custom bicycles, a sweet townhouse, and fast German cars.
It is just weighing so darn heavily upon me that my life choices are sending up so many red flags. Oh, noes!

 castlehillsmile
Joined: 11/4/2015
Msg: 50
Men who have no childern after 50
Posted: 11/25/2015 6:25:44 PM
^^^^^^ Yet another tantalising reason to love you Eric.

Especially if you are a woman over 50 who also has no children.
A big bonus for me.
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