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Show ALL Forums  > Science/philosophy  > would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?      Home login  
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 _shakti_
Joined: 7/5/2011
Msg: 26
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?Page 2 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
^^ Yeah, I've been on that side of things too.
 skinnymom
Joined: 3/2/2013
Msg: 27
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/23/2013 5:23:50 PM
To me it is simple:
I believe what I believe & you believe what you believe.
Your beliefs do not alter mine & mine do not alter yours.

As long as the morals & ethics are similar ~ acceptance is possible.

I may not go to church or believe in the Christian faith, but if I met a man with strong religious beliefs I would support & encourage him in going to church, praying, or however he chose to worship. All I would ask in return would be the same respect to follow my religious beliefs as they best suite me.

When you are with someone you love & accept them for who they are & their beliefs are a part of that. Alter that & you alter the core of who you fell in love with.
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 28
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would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/23/2013 6:36:43 PM
Of course I wouldn't put off just by the fact a woman believed in God. If she were normal and reasonable--and if she was sure sexual naughtiness was just fine with God--I'd probably see her belief as a benefit. But the devil is in the details. I have run into women who had some pretty bizarre religious views and practices, and I couldn't imagine being in a close relationship with them.
 msitgal
Joined: 10/7/2012
Msg: 29
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would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/24/2013 9:01:45 PM
Which god? I am not being facetious here, I am being straight honest with the question.
 59thShadeofGrey
Joined: 9/25/2012
Msg: 30
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/25/2013 7:48:16 AM
Just notice how that as the God of the Bible is being replaced by the antichrists among us, how quickly they come up with principles to live by from some other source.


What a bunch of horseshit. The fact that the Reciprocal Altruism practiced by Atheists may be new to you based on your limited worldview, doesn't make it something new. It's been well-understood for centuries. You might try to stop constantly lying about things you are ignorant of. It would get you some credibility.
 jed456
Joined: 4/26/2005
Msg: 31
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would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/25/2013 12:45:53 PM
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?

No But if they are a proselytizer or every minute of the day is about Jesus,Mohammed etc then no thank you.If they want to go to church,temple etc feel free but I am not going.
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/25/2013 4:48:53 PM
(would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?)

...another example of how religion has drawn walls between people. Unity and peace my ass.
 Moochi19
Joined: 3/27/2010
Msg: 33
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would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/25/2013 11:15:16 PM
Amen, lol the truth. Everyone has their own god, they are all antichrist figures.
 ironwinecoffee
Joined: 9/4/2012
Msg: 34
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/30/2013 12:10:08 PM
It definitely influences me and I live in the South where religion/faith is a big deal. I ma a humanist/agnostic/salad bar spiritualist. My ex was more or less the same. I would hesitate to date somebody who put their faith front and center in their life only because I think it would end up being a relationship deal breaker later on. I have no intentions of mocking another's faith and I would expect the same, respect for my ambivalence. My ideal partner would have a similar orientation to religion that I do. I think most serious Christians would find it impossible to sustain a romantic relationship with somebody who was not.
 Double Cabin
Joined: 11/29/2004
Msg: 35
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would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/30/2013 1:58:44 PM
If I didn't I'd rarely get laid within 500 miles of here.

Christian mythology consumes a lot of folks, but lotsd of Christians ladies I've known measure a man more by his characterr than instutionalized convictions. Even the ones with magic underwear.
 Darrin_SM
Joined: 11/17/2013
Msg: 36
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 1:44:05 AM
After some thirty-odd years of living, I recently embraced atheism (Richard Dawkin's literature was a huge catalyst towards that end). Anyway, I've noticed lately that nearly every woman who lives around me is a believer in some form of Christianity. It was kind of dissapointing, because I knew that if I wanted to date a woman who shared my newfound attitude, I'd be far more likely to go dateless. Still, I'd date a theist. I just hope whatever theist woman I date doesn't hold it against me if I try to engage her in some friendly discourse in our opposing beliefs.
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 2:54:35 AM

Simply stated, a god is that which gives you your core values and defines right and wrong for you. Everyone believes in a god because everyone has those beliefs

No. Wrong. Your values and ideas about right and wrong are things that you have or choose for either good or dumb reasons, but it isn't a god that gives them to us or defines them for us. And, believing in god and having values or ideas about right and wrong don't go hand in hand. Everyone who believes in god doesn't do so because they have them, and everyone who has them doesn't do so because they believe in god. And, a distinction should be made between calling them "beliefs", or calling them values and ideas about right and wrong. And, it should be understood that some choose values and moralities for half-responsible reasons, but still need to associate those choices with a god-idea, which is a bad thing to do...or, they are not admitting to themselves that it is still them who make the choices, to whatever degree of responsible thoughtfulness, though they continue to believe that it's from some god-form.

Everyone has a god within their mind that defines right and wrong for them, that justifies them in what they do...

No. Wrong. This is true about many people, but also not true for many others. The people who scare me the least, and are the most reliable in the ways that matter, are those whose values, principles, and ideas about right and wrong are not derived via an idea of god or any kind of god-figure, but instead are derived via honest conscious objective reflection, and from a standpoint of intellectual, emotional, and social maturity and adjustment...instead of simply adopting beliefs about these things from some form of god-source.

All of these Biblical forms of worship are inborn in each one of us

No. Wrong. It's just that the religious-minded want to keep touting this false propoganda.

...He who created this universe and revealed Himself through Jesus...notice how that as the God of the Bible is being replaced by the antichrists among us...The real challenge is to find He who is the one and only true God and follow His precepts and teachings...

No. Wrong. The god of the bible is not being replaced by antichrists, and the phenomena of mythology, allegory, and metaphor to help us understand morality has existed long before, and independent of, the god of the bible. And, finding a one and true god-source for moralities is a dangerous lazy cop-out...the real challenge, which real men and women have the balls and guts to take on, is to reflect on and choose values, moralities, principles, and ideas about right and wrong via honest conscious objective reflection from a standpoint of intellectual, emotional, and social maturity and adjustment.

Religion does not have a patent on morality. A destructive element in society and people's psychology is the belief that it does. Your values and ideas about morality are at the core of who you are, and a woman who still confuses this with ideas about god, or needs a god for them, is someone who is not grown in a fundamental way and whose character will always be lacking in a fundamental way, no matter who she might happen to be in all other respects, which would undermine any good relationship that I could have with her.

"The greatest tragedy in mankind's history may be the hijacking of morality by religion."
- Arthur C. Clarke

"The real tragedy that may occur in any of our lives is not the losing of our faith...The real tragedy is to not lose our faith...to be satisfied, to be smug and content, to have arrived..."
- Bert C. Williams
 CureCurious
Joined: 2/22/2014
Msg: 38
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 7:37:15 AM
Frankly, I'd turn down a relationship with someone who rejects God hehehehehehehe.

and it's not simply because they don't believe in God.. it's because.. many atheists I have met, have an arrogance about them, and unreliability that doesn't click with me.. not saying they're arrogant or unreliable.. but in relation to someone respcting my beliefs.. I see them always trying to belittle or well... being to material... I can't talk philosophy or spirituality with them..
 Westernguy
Joined: 2/14/2014
Msg: 39
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 8:16:04 AM

If it is taken to mean the possibility a higher entity could have created the physical laws of the universe, then sure. No one knows, or can know what existed before...well...existence.

If it's one of several dozen human fantasies involving witchcraft, human resurrection, walking on water, or angry gods throwing lightning bolts....it would certainly be a turnoff, because it implies somewhat pre-operational logic.



+ 1

I wouldn't want to be with someone trying to convert me but at the same time would prefer someone open to the idea of something out there.



Westernguy
 Yule_liquor
Joined: 12/7/2011
Msg: 40
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 8:38:22 AM
msg 46 (curious) says:



many atheists I have met, have an arrogance about


I don't think this applies to all Atheists but this statement is not totally false or untrue; I believe that this stems largely from the cause or reason that drove them into being Atheist. If it was a reactionary or unterse reason (in defiance of organized religion) because they felt that "they" were not given life's due rewards (or any other form of imaginary entitlement); or even perhaps that such a 'God' has not offered them personal or empiric proof of his existence (as though they were worthy of it in some way) before they would acquiesce. Thus, I think that such an arrogance is more a reflection of that person's character or personality than anything else.



I see them always trying to belittle ...


To be fair, there is no shortage of arrogant religious (fundamentalists of all kinds) people who look down, disrespect, belittle, even do harm to others who they feel to be above because their "sky-creator" is better or more real than someone else's.
 ThatGirlNamedAlli
Joined: 12/28/2013
Msg: 41
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 8:54:24 AM
If it played a role in his life and families life. going to church, churchy things. I have no patience for that gibberish and chances are I'll offend his family eventually, so best to just avoid it.
 CureCurious
Joined: 2/22/2014
Msg: 42
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 10:23:36 AM
Yule Liquor,

Absolutely. My post was sort of a reversed response to the thread question - ie, it asks would u reject someone who believes in god... and I answered it the other way around. This does not mean I do not engage with atheists or agnostics. Hey, I'm here aren't I? I enjoy conversing with them. I like their style of friendships too. I was talking to anatheist friend the other day and she really just gave me a lot of oxygen. I never expected it from her since she's got ABI/acquired brain injury... and she can be very crass and socially demanding... but she's awesome. Anyway, the question was about relationships.... and relationships tend to work best when similar life outlooks, experiences, values etc are shared.. not identical... but... amenable to ech other. Likewise, I would run away from a super religious person as well....it's about finding that balance and connection. And frankly, I've experimented from the religious to the secular... i know why certain people become atheists, why certainbecome theists... i think listening to peoples life stories, and what led them to accept and reject certain things is an adventure in itself.
 ohwhynot46
Joined: 6/28/2009
Msg: 43
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would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 5:00:56 PM

I believe that this stems largely from the cause or reason that drove them into being Atheist. If it was a reactionary or unterse reason (in defiance of organized religion) because they felt that "they" were not given life's due rewards (or any other form of imaginary entitlement); or even perhaps that such a 'God' has not offered them personal or empiric proof of his existence (as though they were worthy of it in some way) before they would acquiesce. Thus, I think that such an arrogance is more a reflection of that person's character or personality than anything else.


Aren't your first & last statement contradictory? I completely agree that the arrogant would be so regardless of the presence or absence of theism, but one does not become arrogant based on their perception of the effects of either theism or atheism, rather based on their perception of self & others, no? One needn't be "driven" into atheism. Neither theist nor atheist corners the market on pomposity, as far as I can see (although I admit to finding within these forums the most pompous atheists, personifying zealotry, I have ever come across but I don't believe they reflect reality behind these [fire]walls, so to speak).


To be fair, there is no shortage of arrogant religious (fundamentalists of all kinds) people who look down, disrespect, belittle, even do harm to others who they feel to be above because their "sky-creator" is better or more real than someone else's.


I don't believe that those who do as you cite do so because of their feelings in regards to their "sky creator"; they do so because they have character flaws. For the most part, religion (no matter the religion) advocates tolerance & love of fellow man, at its' core. It is the misguided who use religion as an excuse to treat others poorly, who defend their actions in the name of religion when no such excuse exists in the larger picture painted by religion.
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 5:32:10 PM
...in this thread, at the present moment, there's already a movement towards being sucked and tricked into a discussion about the arrogance of some which cleverly ignores strong indications that the interpretation that says that some people are arrogant is quite inaccurate. But I didn't miss it. And my clarity is seldom clouded with smoke.
 nanshe1111
Joined: 2/7/2014
Msg: 45
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would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/5/2014 6:53:34 PM
As an Agnostic, I equally don't mind dating somebody who believes in God and those who do not believe in God. What matters to me is your reason for your belief or non-belief. In my opinion, an ignorant militant Atheist whose belief is based only on what he read on science magazines or wikipedia is as bad as a Theist whose belief is based on an ancient book. Both had to rely and have faith on what others told them. A person who claim to be an Atheist and have not even have a concrete definition of the God they don't believe in is ignorant. If someone told me that the Sun is God because their definition of God is an existence that gives light and sustain life, then I will say I agree, I am also a theist in that sense. If they said that God is an existence that is incomprehensible by our primitive brain, then I am also a theist in that sense that I believe there are things that are incomprehensible by our primitive brain. If they said God is the character in a book who supposedly caused a flood, killed a lot of people and hate gays, then I am an Atheist.

I will not date somebody who cannot philosophized their own belief. Doesn't matter how scientific they think they are. If you say you do not believe in God because of evolution, then you are ignorant because evolution only explains the diversity of life and not the origin of life.
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/6/2014 4:45:35 AM
This ^ is an example of what I meant with this v in another thread...not an obvious direct cause/effect, and seemingly not the same thing, but still the same dynamic and type of problem.

That happens way too much, in a lot of different ways...people's awareness or perspective of science or anything scientific is according to science writers and pop media, not science itself. You can see it in what people say, how they talk about science-stuff, what their opinions of science or scientific activities are, and how they argue for or against things. It does a lot of damage. A lot. You end up constantly with a very big part of the populace having strong opinions about important things, thinking that they are informed or read-up, but don't know what the hell they're talking about and have some very weird ideas about things. And then when us sciencey people try to fix that situation, we're just being know-it-alls, smarter-than-the-scientists, smug belittling condescending whatever-we-ares.
 April1963
Joined: 6/7/2013
Msg: 47
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/6/2014 11:37:10 AM

would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in [A God?


A GOD
This question seems to me very interesting, because I do believe in God,But if he does not believe in the same God, then I would turn down that relationship...for example, if the God He worships is a dragon...lol
 Yule_liquor
Joined: 12/7/2011
Msg: 48
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/6/2014 5:48:38 PM
@ msg 51


Aren't your first & last statement contradictory?



I don't believe that those who do as you cite do so because of their feelings in regards to their "sky creator";


Not when you have a large body(or a sizable society) of pple who express an arrogance stemming from their religious foundation. We cannot therefore say that because of this widespread arrogance within a given group of Theists is solely due to personality or character flaws. Rather in this case it would be due to the pre-programming laid upon a said society by their respective clergy/clerics, over and over about their religious superiority.

I know that there are Atheistic organizations that share their views and opinions among themselves but if I'm not mistaken, I don't think that there is any sizable organized body from which all Atheists draw their dogma from, that is analogous to say; the RCC, Hinduism, or Islam.
 Demigod1979
Joined: 12/4/2011
Msg: 49
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would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/6/2014 5:51:11 PM

and it's not simply because they don't believe in God.. it's because.. many atheists I have met, have an arrogance about them, and unreliability that doesn't click with me.. not saying they're arrogant or unreliable.. but in relation to someone respcting my beliefs.. I see them always trying to belittle or well... being to material... I can't talk philosophy or spirituality with them..

Perhaps so, but arrogance can work both ways. As you may know, every once in a while a theist comes along who insists that evolution (or radiometric dating, or any other proven scientific theory) is false. By taking the position that they do and refusing to budge from it, they are basically saying that they know more about science than actual scientists! Frankly, this is one of the most arrogant positions I can imagine (I may not be the dumbest person in the world, but I wouldn't even think of comparing my feeble level of knowledge to scientists). There's also a documentary by Richard Dawkins called 'Root of all evil' (not his personal choice for title), where the pastor, Ted Haggard, comes out as one of the most arrogant people that I've had the pleasure of not meeting.

It should also be noted that many atheists, if not most, have come out of (abusive) religious families and so are sensitive to theists and theism. Robert Price once mentioned this, saying that many atheists have a kind of Dracula-response to Jesus. Perhaps this causes them to overreact sometimes, and that may cause them to come out as argumentative and arrogant.

As for the topic, I wouldn't mind being friends with someone who believed in god(s), although I'm not sure about anything beyond that. I guess it depends on their level of religiosity (if they are sufficiently lax in their faith then I think I'd be fine with it). Although I'm an arrogant atheist type on internet forums, I rarely talk about such things in real life (prefer to focus on real life ;) ).
would you turn down a relationship with someone who believes in a God?
Posted: 3/7/2014 6:10:32 PM
We need to admit that we could probably cut out a significant majority percentage of the non-religious or atheist types who're accused of being arrogant or smug away from the group of candidates who might in fact be that way. One very big problem is the un-objective reaction to, and interpretation of, the non-religious by the religious...in other words, the religious (and in-betweeners, so-called agnostics) have a bad habit of labeling people as smug or arrogant just because they theirselves are wrong about something or when someone disagrees with them. The non-religious party very often isn't doing anything at all out of the ordinary, but simply disagreeing and trying to correct someone or conduct conversation in a manner that is much more productive than a typical religious person is used to, but the religious are notorious for having some kind of weird insecurity in this department and being so quick to call anyone smug or arrogant in these situations, just because they're trying to say "...now hold on...that's not entirely accurate..."
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