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Joined: 12/30/2012
Msg: 21
she says she's not always onlinePage 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Sun, this is true if the profile is HIDDEN. If not, then you do not need to be online to view.
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 22
view profile
she says she's not always online
Posted: 12/29/2013 1:13:07 PM
What possible difference would it make, if I understand what some are saying here, that he doesn't have to log in to check up on her being online? It's not whether or not he logged in or not, it's that he's checking to see if she's here online which means he's here, hidden or not, checking on her. And a few dates in 6 months, what the hell does that mean? How can you be in a relationship, be thinking about making it exclusive, if you've only gone on a few dates in 6 months? That's crazy, you don't know someone after a few dates, no matter how often you talk online.

If you don't trust someone and feel the need to spy on them, then go for it but what a waste of time. Don't keep dating someone you don't trust, don't pretend you have a relationship when all you are doing is dating once in a while, and don't act all holier-than-thou if you are spying on someone then call them out for being online. We are all capable of being online without looking to get some cheap sex with some stranger. Who in the world are some of you dating? When things get that bad in your own head that you think someone you planned on committing to, is cheating, you think so to the point of needing to spy on them, isn't that kind of a duh...why am I thinking of being with someone I think is cheating?
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 23
view profile
she says she's not always online
Posted: 12/29/2013 5:31:43 PM
"We have talked about starting a committed relationship and we are both in agreement that should be our next step."

Well since you've only TALKED ABOUT starting a committed relationship and that should be your next step, I assume you're not IN a committed relationship. Should you take that next step and START a committed relationship, then you should bring that up, because until you are you shouldn't be concerned about it. I think that you're not really secure about whatever it is you have with this person and are constantly checking on her (since you have to be on here YOURSELF to know if she is) it makes you appear paranoid. If I were you I wouldn't take that step, but NOT because of her being on here. It sounds like you need to fix yourself before you become involved with someone, you seem very insecure.
Joined: 6/3/2013
Msg: 24
she says she's not always online
Posted: 12/29/2013 5:57:07 PM
You met her 6 months ago but have only been out on a few dates? How are you ready to talk about being exclusive? Talking on the phone and texting doesn't make a relationship. Spending time together does.
Besides that, maybe she logs on all the time to post on forums and not search profiles?
Joined: 10/24/2010
Msg: 25
she says she's not always online
Posted: 12/29/2013 10:01:46 PM
Are you two official yet? Take that step and then you can start demanding she hop off of here.
Joined: 12/27/2013
Msg: 26
she says she's not always online
Posted: 12/30/2013 6:19:29 AM
My phone makes it look like I live on POF 24/7. Not sure why but it's so not true. But you must be logging on several times a day to notice that she's on here, right?
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 27
she says she's not always online
Posted: 12/30/2013 6:28:56 AM
Update: Take a look at the OP's profile headline in his profile. I do believe he and the lady friend of which he spoke are no longer thinking "exclusive" anymore. Just a guess. I'm thinking he's looking for a new job as a weight scale.
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 28
view profile
she says she's not always online
Posted: 12/30/2013 6:39:59 AM
I like his headline. My scale stops at 125...
Joined: 6/23/2013
Msg: 29
she says she's not always online
Posted: 12/30/2013 8:22:26 PM
Walts and ^^^^^^....interesting, I have received such an email just stating those very same that's what he meant.....he is looking for a job as a weight scale. Wow! I got it....I'll pass, I prefer the old-fashioned kind, sitting not needed.
Joined: 11/22/2013
Msg: 30
she says she's not always online
Posted: 1/3/2014 8:41:56 AM
I've often considered making a pic of my smartphone as my main profile pic. Too many misunderstandings about the online status thing. I forget to log out of the app and women think I'm online 24/7.

In 2012, a gal woke up all bit&hy and grouchy. She left in a huff and text me later she was disgusted that I was on PoF when I went to the bathroom. Huh? WTF?

My phone was being charged actually. She used her phone while I was in the bathroom to check my online status. Pathetic. She should have just asked and I would have calmly explained that my phone is logged in.

I decided not to see her again because of her poor conflict resolution skills.
Joined: 11/12/2013
Msg: 31
she says she's not always online
Posted: 1/7/2014 10:11:21 AM
I get messages from people I'm chatting with on here and they often complain that I'm online and hint that they are suspicious I'm already 'cheating' on them or multiple dating or even in some cases I've been accused of being a 'fake' because this site logs me on whenever I happen to use my phone near an internet connection area. These sites are NOT for the suspicious, I'll tell you that.
At least you're willing to look into it, op, before throwing stones at her.
Joined: 11/11/2013
Msg: 32
she says she's not always online
Posted: 1/8/2014 6:50:11 AM

If these guys you are CHATTING with are already being possessive, can you imagine what they will be like once you actually meet them? Plus, they have to be online to see that you are ... Tell them it's none of their business why you are or are not online .
Joined: 12/21/2013
Msg: 33
she says she's not always online
Posted: 1/8/2014 5:44:33 PM
mrsforums solved your problem quite clearly.

Pour two glasses of wine, sit down together and delete both of your accounts, and toast to a new beginning.

This way, there's no confusion about motive for EITHER of you having active profiles on a dating site.

If you both want to visit the forums, open a profile together that both of you can access.

Easy peasy.


Now, as for not always being on-line, I was quite surprised by this person's comment:

I work full time and am not on this site all day, mainly in the evenings for an hour or so. I do have a life! LOL

Well I am certainly not on this site all day, as I imagine the majority of POF members are not also.
What I did find funny was the comment about working full time.
I am sure it was not meant to be taken how I perceived it but I couldn't help wonder why quite a few people believe that "having a life" means you should be working full time?

Although I am by no means wealthy, I certainly am in a position to work when I want to or just work part-time, so that I can enjoy life.

It is unfortunate that there are not more people that refuse to work full time all their lives, so that they "can" have a life.
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 35
view profile
she says she's not always online
Posted: 10/29/2017 3:06:54 PM
OP's headline: "a sexy woman to sit on my face!!!" Times have changed in 4.5 years. :)

I met a great girl online 6 months ago. We talk/text everyday and have been out on a few dates.

A few dates over 6 months isn't dating. So I don't know why a committed relationship would be in the works. You guys were basically just friends where, if/when meeting, you'd be more than platonic. It's more like it has potential to start DATING -- which *then* turns into talk about a committed relationship After you Actually start dating for a little while and go with the flow of it. Until then, don't make things weird with a gal with talk about "committed relationship".

And yes, people will be online when they're not scouring online live. Maybe 4.5 years ago it was worse, I dunno. But if I check my POF, then close the app, it still says I'm online to other onlookers. From a non-phone (most people use their phone tho) -- you basically have to Log Out. Otherwise, it'll tick tock for a while saying you're online when you're not. Having your POF app in the background on your phone, even when not using it, will have you as online. So you have to Close the app, then wait a while.
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 36
she says she's not always online
Posted: 11/6/2017 2:14:05 AM
The problem is not that the online indicators say she is online - they are not accurate.

The real problem is you have been dating a woman for six months but do not have a serious relationship....... if it were ever going to happen with this woman, it would have happened months ago.
Joined: 5/30/2017
Msg: 37
she says she's not always online
Posted: 12/17/2017 4:16:32 PM
Well it might be logged in all time but that's not the point the point is if she wishes to go on it all day everyday it's her prerogative and it's not for you to bully her or decided whether she is telling you the truth or not! Because she is the woman and is entitled to get attention and offers right up till the best man has proved himself that he can make her happy and make it worthwhile to settle on one single dude! now seeing as men's success rate in this area is critically red alert bad your best bet is to work harder because you clearly are becoming as interesting as a pork pie left at back of the fridge material and better offers out there she wishes to keep track of
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