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 spirited-won
Joined: 1/6/2013
Msg: 44
Dating use to be fun...Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Yeah, it's pretty basic...if he texts/calls he's interested. If he doesn't or contact dies...he's just not that into you... Nothing to figure out there sweetheart.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 45
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/20/2013 7:17:53 PM
We can't act aggresive or we are labelled needy. We can't act passive or we are called flakes . We can't have "fun" with you, and then decided that the "fun" isn't enough, and stop what hasn't really started or we are labelled "players". And yeah, you had a very BIG part in the process of making the men that we are now.


You forgot to add in one of the cardinal sins of dating to some women: If a guy dare use a coupon on a date, he's a cheap SOB who will be blacklisted forever. Only cash and credit cards at full price are acceptable.
 slowitalldown
Joined: 1/25/2013
Msg: 46
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/20/2013 7:56:26 PM
Because some of the men I date tend to be shy, if a meet or date goes well, I'll send them a text to say I enjoyed meeting them, or I had a good time- just something to let them know I'm open to further contact.

But other than that- I don't need a guy to tell me he's not interested. If he doesn't contact me, I know. Just don't sit around waiting or worrying if he calls you and you wont be disturbed by this.

If a guy asks me out after we have met and I'm not interested, I'll straight out tell him I don't think we are a match. I won't call them or text after the date- I will say it was nice meeting them when we part and that's it. And I pay for myself.

If you have been seeing someone more than 3 dates- then they really should let you know they don't feel the connection or something, to be polite. If you have had sex, (unless it's first date sex because that should be obvious it may not go past there) then at the very least a phone call NOT text.

But that's my version of manners. Your results may vary.
 Bohica4u
Joined: 2/11/2013
Msg: 47
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/20/2013 8:23:29 PM
its about attitude have one that says lets have fun lets try new things lets try something we havent and if you step in a few potholes along the way no big deal..step over the next ones and keep moving forward...finding compatibility is not easy but the adventure to finding it can be....otherwise if it was easy it would not be treasured so
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 48
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/21/2013 8:57:00 AM
Meh..something shinier caught his attention and off he went in that direction.

Lots of folks treat online dating sites like they're candy stores - there's too much to choose from and they're constantly grabbing whatever they can off the shelf.
 JS3344
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 49
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History
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/21/2013 9:08:35 AM
Boy did I get burned last night......girl sent me a flirt, led to a phone call, everything was cool. I disreguarded the no dinner rule, because I liked her picture so much, and I had to drive 41 miles to an affluent area, so i didn't want to be a cheap ass, I thought magic might happen.
I show up and she looks nothing like her picture, not fat, but instead of shoulder length brunette, she had black hair to her knees, and it was obvious the profile pic was at least 20 years old....if it was her. She also lied about her occupation, said she was in health care...turns out she works in a dog kennel, slight difference. I'm livid she misrepresented herself, and pissed at myself for being an such an idiot, thats never happened before because I'm real careful at checking a profile...I am so pissed i need to break something.
 charliesmom21
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 50
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/21/2013 9:15:37 AM
^^^ thinking with the wrong head I would guess. LOL
 ThisIsExistence
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 51
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/21/2013 9:19:38 AM
^^^^^ So, did you walk out on her?
 JS3344
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 52
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History
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/21/2013 9:25:54 AM
yes i bought a drink then i split, never had to do that before. And you shouldn't assume I was thinking with the wrong head, it was the phone call that impressed me more than anything, some guys are mature and looking at a bigger picture if you didn't know.
 Amber_07
Joined: 3/8/2013
Msg: 53
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/21/2013 3:19:35 PM
Thanks everyone! Lot's of opinions given here. Low and behold after that one text I sent Tuesday morning, he contacted me last night. We will see what happens, I am not texting him first for a long time...only time will tell what happens.
 buckmaker
Joined: 4/20/2009
Msg: 54
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Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/21/2013 6:15:42 PM
I am gonna go out on a limb here and bet that the guy is married [i.e., family means wife].
From what I read from a lot of gals here, these free sites are perfect for that. Plus lots of smart guys
know that women who look good are highly intrigued by guys who do not go head over heals for them.
It is counterintuitive but true.
 CaptainTeebs
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 55
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/21/2013 7:01:58 PM

But why act like you are interested immediately after meeting. His text to me Friday night was "It was awesome meeting you today"...what's the point in saying that if you really aren't interested or if something else is going to sway you so easily and quickly.

Owell chalk another one up...



cause it probably was awesome meeting you,,,,,it also is just as likely the thought of dating you on a regular basis was not quite as awesome of an idea ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

it's called being polite,,what was he suppose to say "hey,,had a mediocre time and your an ok person"

seriously? it's all social training and saying what you think the other person wants to hear to avoid potential drama ,,and men,,,,,,,,,,,,,hate drama ,,,for the most part:)


Brilliantly put. This should answer, BMOE , 20% of the forum threads here; why people get confused over signals after meeting once, and the consequent interactions.
 twelfth_dimension
Joined: 7/23/2011
Msg: 56
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/21/2013 8:41:19 PM

Always baffling to me why females cannot interpret blatant behavior.
It is so simple.
If a male is into you, he makes that PLAIN. Men are not subtle creatures, when interested they DO NOT back off, drop contact or avoid you.
If he was as into you as you are him, HE would've been calling/texting/planning another outing posthaste.

I truly wonder if some of the females on here who ask these things have ever had a male REALLY into them.
Trust me, when they ARE, there is no mistaking it.
Fellows, please chime in here...is this not so? Or is my experience unique?


This is absolute gospel. I can back up your experience 100% -- when a man is truly interested he will pester you to no end -- until he gets a response or you basically just ignore him completely for days, sometimes weeks or the new Xbox 720 comes out. Uninterested males ... will let you pursue them to fluff their egos and nothing more.
 ReadBeforeWriting
Joined: 9/30/2012
Msg: 57
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/22/2013 5:01:41 AM
12th Dimension, you are scary beautiful so I can well imagine you've had similar experience. I truly wonder why many females on here have not? Some are very beautiful also but seem to be ill treated by men more often than not, used and one night stand type treatment and I cannot but shake my head when reading these threads of "is he into me? he doesn't call but is he into me?". Baffling.

OP, prepare to be second fiddle/back burner/whatever cliche you choose to call it because that is where you're headed with this one, I suspect.
Prediction: he shall get you to bed fairly quickly then vanish OR string along for easy sex. Many threads on that subject.
I hope it goes another way but I bet not.
You're an attractive girl, why settle for crumbs?
 charliesmom21
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 58
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/22/2013 6:06:50 AM
+1 12th dimension.. this is so true. Men sometimes treat women like they are less than or as objects.. its truly pathetic. You can not be used if you do not let them use you. Create positive boundaries and do not let anyone push you into doing something that is against your belief system. ( Keep it real)
 curviest
Joined: 5/28/2010
Msg: 59
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History
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/22/2013 3:40:00 PM
OP Amber -- I have the same experience time and again.

Currently bemused by a man I had dinner with 14 days ago, who emailed me the next day saying he had a great time, loved out conversation, loved my company, looks forward to many more, is "very keen" on me, "can't wait" to see me again.

I replied (email) saying that I would "love to" see him again, and I have heard absolutely not one word from him since. That is now 13 days that he has not made contact -- a total contradiction of all the things he said! Men are infuriating!

I actually don't know what to do on this occasion. I have his mobile phone number (and he has mine). Part of me says, dial the number and speak to him. Another says, send a text - maybe he didn't get my email? But 90% of me says, he just likes to say pretty things and has probably found someone else that he likes better.

As so many have said on here, if a man wants you, he'll get in touch. He has my phone and email, and he hasn't... so?
 Archangel_07
Joined: 6/21/2010
Msg: 60
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/22/2013 3:46:26 PM
Texting pisses me off and it should be left for teenie boppers to do that. But in this day and age when people can't call during work hours. I understand. I still text even tho I would prefer calling and talking. OP at least you know that he was not interested, it's better for them to show that they are not interested, rather than lead you on and find out it was a big lie.
 mmgt
Joined: 1/11/2013
Msg: 61
Dating use to be fun...
Posted: 3/22/2013 4:34:34 PM
Yea I don't think hes interested. I believe guys rarely play "games" so to speak, especially at your age, no offence implied. If a guy likes you he won't ignore your txts etc. Even though you had a nice date doesn't mean hes physically attracted to you either, again no offence intended. I had an ok date the other week, was pleasant etc. but we haven't msged eachother again. I didn't feel much attraction with the woman and neither did she I believe. Texting is ok but as others say it definately lacks any emotion or connection as do phone calls. Maintaining this connection after the date seems important in knowing where both sides stand and further developing that bond, something which electronic messages fail to do...
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