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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve      Home login  
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 Madailein
Joined: 6/9/2012
Msg: 24
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approvePage 2 of 2    (1, 2)

She is in the family business and they only want her to date certain types of men. So at 44 years old she has never been married and her last boyfriend was 5 years ago. Would any of you stop or have stopped dating someone because of your family?

Well if the business is worth millions and she stands to inherit it …may be reason enough to kowtow to her family. Also, if they are worth a great deal they may fear some guy, who is not as solvent as they would prefer, wants her for her money.


She was really upset about it and cried a little.

I’m not buying it. 44 and with money; she would have found a way to see you, unless she is mentally deficient, without anyone knowing.
 ShelbySask4friend1
Joined: 2/10/2005
Msg: 25
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 3/20/2013 10:43:57 PM

Perhaps she's just using that as an excuse? Because she didn't have the balls to tell you that you didn't measure up for her? I don't know, just a thought that crossed my mind.


I was considering the same thing....

though, again, families with expectations, and , uhm, money, lots of money, I have seen in different scenarios, and very similar to your predicament...

I could offer advice, but, if you want a happy ending, I would advise you to watch:
Meet the Parents
followed by
Meet the Fockers

for tips on how, everything works out in the end, of a very similar situation...
 buckmaker
Joined: 4/20/2009
Msg: 26
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History
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 3/21/2013 6:24:27 PM
Yo dude.
Women lie just like men do.
Sometimes they just dont like you but say something to help ease your pain.
Any woman who has not been married by the age of 44 probably looks like a lump of dump anyway.
Just sayin.
 ArtDeVivre777
Joined: 3/2/2013
Msg: 27
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 3/21/2013 8:44:22 PM
Well, it sounds like an excuse to me . Sometimes people don't want to tell us that they are not that into us and try to make it less painful. It's not you,it's me , in this case well, it's not you,it's my parents.

For example,last time the guy decided not to ask me out for the decent second date was like he said that he lives too far from me to build a LRT with me and take me out for dates, we lived only 20 minutes drive from each other lol, but he was willing to have something casual if I don't mind coming over to his place . :(

That was ridiculous of course,I didn't even answer. I laughed and moved on to the next guy who is a very decent n nice man,with whom I already had several nice dinner n movie type of dates and hope it will go well. Never settle for crumbs , try to get the whole pie as my grandma used to say.
 SimpleCltMan
Joined: 11/11/2011
Msg: 28
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 3/22/2013 8:10:15 AM

Well, it sounds like an excuse to me . Sometimes people don't want to tell us that they are not that into us and try to make it less painful. It's not you,it's me , in this case well, it's not you,it's my parents.


I wish it was that easy. Remember, we stayed friends and I see how manipulative her parents are. They control everything her life. They have money and influence. They own her car, her condo, and apparently her. They want someone that can take care of her and lavish gifts on her. That wasn't me. So I truly think it was her parents and it is sad to think that could happen, but it did.
 BabblingBrookes
Joined: 2/14/2013
Msg: 29
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 3/26/2013 5:54:56 AM
My mother is vocally against me dating white men. She's fine with any minority group, but throws a fit if I bring a white guy home. She was always polite to the guy, but she made it clear to me she didn't approve. I finally had to tell her to get over it, or forgo seeing me in the future. If she wants to be a bigot, she can do so on her own time.

She's FINALLY calmed down and told me, "there's just no changing you.". My mother is a stubborn woman who married a stubborn man...what did she think she'd get out of a child? Someone tell me who I can love and marry? Pshaw. Not going to happen.

As for your friend, she's a free woman if she chooses to be. She doesn't want to be free.
 Advwench
Joined: 12/29/2012
Msg: 30
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 4/4/2013 12:27:57 PM
I remember when I was 30, unmarried (but in a long-term relationship) and pregnant; a woman from work who was my age at the time said "OMG, my parents would kill me!" Really? At 30 years of age your parents have a say in your reproductive life?

I can't imagine being 44 and caring what my parents think of who I'm dating... granted, my family isn't even a little bit close so I doubt they'll even MEET anyone I date unless it's at our wedding ;)
 shine1274
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 31
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 4/4/2013 12:46:07 PM
I realized one day my parents were tumors, so I treated them as such.
 liftnw8z2
Joined: 11/12/2012
Msg: 32
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 4/4/2013 1:00:18 PM
^^ With both my parents passed away, I can't fathom the amount of disrespect that statement just screams at me.

To the subject - there comes a point where your parents need to care about, but not control, your life. It's hard to let go.
 Infinity256
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 33
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 4/4/2013 1:34:22 PM
I totally agree with you. I met a guy off of here two years ago. Fell in love with him. He broke me off with the same line. His family would never approve of me because of the color of my skin. I know that I am just not feeling for him. I really acted like a nut case when he broke it off. I knew he cared about me just as much as I him. Just wouldn't go for what makes him happy. I have recently observed him riding by my parents home. He is lonely no matter how many other women he dates because I fill the gap in his heart. His family can not fill his heart with the type of love, comfort and joy I brought to him. It's really sad. Most black people are accepting of whoever their children bring home and if not, they still manage to be cordial to satisfy that family member because they love them. It's not that way when your dealing with your American Caucasian. I have dated interracially all of my life. Mostly Russian,German,Italian... Never had any race issues, but American born its a whole different ballgame. I have also dated someone who came from a very well off Caucasian Republican family. Never had any problems with them. They didn't so much have an issue with my race. Were accepting of me because they looked at my families Land and Home as we were well to do well off people of color. I have attended events with this particular ex where I witnessed them (his family and friends)degrade poor whites to the extreme I had to excuse myself from the dinner table it was so bad. It was like they had a serious hate for poor whites. They talked about cutting their family members off if they mixed and mingled with such poor whites or anyone who didnt have the status they had. I mean you can't win for loosing...
 Daniel3098
Joined: 3/30/2013
Msg: 34
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I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 4/4/2013 3:07:10 PM
was she greek or italian? i notice women of them ethnicitys tend to be controlled by parents till death..like the girl in my big fat greek wedding! her parents were racist..dont want a ni88ER at the dinner table i guess..your better off my man ,find u a girl whos family will say hell yeah bring him on over or a girl who wont let parents rule her
 shine1274
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 35
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 4/4/2013 9:21:53 PM

With both my parents passed away, I can't fathom the amount of disrespect that statement just screams at me.


You also can't fathom the life I lived.
 oceandreamsnc
Joined: 2/24/2013
Msg: 36
I can't date you, my family wouldn't approve
Posted: 4/4/2013 9:45:05 PM
I have met 4 men in their 50's who have abnormal family attachment issues. I can't figure it out! If momma or daddy says no, they are gone. From now on, I'm only dating sterile orphans!!!
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