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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?      Home login  
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 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 26
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?Page 2 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
I started a Facebook account late 2009, but only update it once in a while. It just takes way too much time and I would want to really understand the software, and I know they are going to keep changing it for the next 5 years, so it would be a constant learning curve.

I am somewhat neutral on the site, use it sometimes, most the the friends my age don't use it at all, some younger friends in their 30s 40s use it so I can keep up with them.

It's nice to be able to keep track of friends that live and travel all over the world. And if I had the time, it would be nice to post timeline pics of travel, etc.

My mother is 86, she uses facebook to get in contract with me when I was traveling in Asia, oddly enough she finds it easier to do that than to figure out how to make international phone calls and doesn't realize the only way I know about FB updates is I get an email. She could send me an email directly,but using FB some other friend might see it and call me and let me know my mother wanted to get in touch with me.

I use Skype a lot, don't text much at all, but I would use whatever medium to keep in touch that worked the best for what I want to do, facebook doesn't fill any needs for me right now and takes up a lot of time.
 deere_rancher
Joined: 4/4/2012
Msg: 27
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Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 8:59:31 AM
Men of all ages use it far less than women. Facebook is a social tool and women have more refined social skills. Men use it and then fall off in numbers. Women use it and keep active with friends and family.


More refined social skills ..? Maybe so but, I find the entire FB format .. illogical and confusing, and thus better suited for women..Which is probably their targeted demographic
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 28
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 9:04:02 AM
According to several sources, there are currently about 165 to 170 Facebook users in the US. The mix is 45% male, 55% female. Age wise, the three largest groups are 25-34, 18-24, and 35-44. People over 55 only comprise about 10-15% of the users. This number has grown significantly, however. Just four years ago only 2% were over 55.
 mjinict
Joined: 8/13/2008
Msg: 29
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Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 9:11:26 AM
Ouch deere rancher, talk about your sweeping gender generalizations! Facebook, I think serves a nice purpouse, keeping in touch with people and posting newsworthy bits and entertaining cartoons/videos. Sometimes have to wade through a lot of crap, though. Like POF, it's something to do while watching tv.

I think as a rule, women get more use out of it. Men don't generally feel the need to post mundane family/friend issues.
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 30
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Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 9:26:17 AM
It is all about privacy, and has little to do with hate, or fear of others.

Do you realize how facebook and myspace are used by employers now? It becomes the norm to check up on employees, use it for evaluations, job advancement, and even more, hiring practices. Those that share their life and mix professional with private, even if careful, will have it viewed and evaluated by many not intended for that purpose.

I feel the same about tweeting and I am amazed as I do my work, how many will bring up potential information found on social networks, and tweeting. More people that I have been on interviews with, and even been interviewed by, have brought up social networks like facebook and how they use it many ways.

I am about being private and keeping my professional life in one place, and my private life in another, and if someone does not like that about me, move on to those that will let the world know everything about who and what they are, with whom they share with, why, and be judged for it!!

cd
 deere_rancher
Joined: 4/4/2012
Msg: 31
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Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 9:27:48 AM
@mjinict
Are men more logical thinking than women ?

On average, yes . The claim.. the male brain is more logical, their brains are polarized torwards the dominant-hemisphere and show greater development in areas involved with rational thinking, while women brains are less polarized and have greater development in areas involved in emotional life

Couple of examples..
Women participate in religion and astrology in higher numbers than men
Both religion and astrology are illogical

But it really comes down to how you define rational or logical thinking

But my point was .... I think FB is designed for women, just like ladies night ..
get the women there ...and the men will come
 mjinict
Joined: 8/13/2008
Msg: 32
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Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 9:36:17 AM
There are plenty of men both logical AND religious.

As far as privacy, as long as you don't post anything too controversial, threatening, or embarrasing such as porn, who cares?
 TheCoolGreenMoss
Joined: 9/13/2010
Msg: 33
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Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 10:40:08 AM
Don't hate it (FB) - thought it was pointless when I first signed up 4/5 years ago though.

I've come to embrace it as my own cyber-timeline; A place to keep track of things I enjoy - music I like, books/articles I read, etc. A kind of personal stamp (here I am, this is me) in the world.

It has also allowed me to keep-in/get-back-in touch with friends/family from long ago; and make a few new ones as well. (Not my primary means of communications - but for the everyday mundane life experiences - it's great.)

I use it for my work as well (a separate page), along with G+, Pinterest, Reddit, and a few others. (G+ is the new 'way to go' by the way.)

I think one has to give it a chance - get creative, and make it their own. It's clunky sometimes - has odd ways of controlling what you see and/or what others see (and seems to change every other day.) It doesn't actually 'do' anything - which is the hardest thing to explain to someone new to it (makes it seem even more pointless.)

I think it's OK and reasonably safe if you're mindful of what you post. The benefits (imo) outweigh any perceived risks.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 34
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 11:15:39 AM
When I tell people I don't have a Facebook profile, some would say "How are you going to keep in touch with friends and relatives? How are you going to find people you went to school with?" I would tell them that with the advances in technology, I have learned how how to use a telephone, and this can used for conversation purposes and can sometimes to lead to face-to-face meetings with conversation in person. People are given vocal cords for a reason. I have even learned how to use e-mail, so I can e-mail anyone in the world and I can even e-mail pictures if I wanted to, which I have done many times and received pictures as well. I can send the same e-mails and pictures to multiple people at the same time by creating a list.

As for as finding people I went to kindergarten with or elementary or high school with, I don't see the point if we haven't remained friends in adult life. I only vaguely recall some names of any former classmates from decades ago, so if I got a message saying: "Hi. This is Joe Smith. We were in grade 6 together. Remember me?" I would think it's a scammer looking to extract money from me and I would delete and block them if I didn't instantly recognize the name. They would be total strangers at this point. I don't understand the mentality of needing to find people who you crossed paths with decades ago for a short period of time who are not part of your current life.
 turnitover1959
Joined: 2/15/2013
Msg: 35
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 11:18:50 AM
We mock what we do not understand. Facebook does have a lot of crap on it but you have to learn how to use it.
You just don't post things or go on pages you know are nonsense. No different than anywhere else on the interrnet.
I keep in touch with my son and other loved ones who live far away. I love that I can get pictures from them rapidly and freely. A lot of men like Facebook . The ones that don't probably don't like computers in general. Many paranoid people out there.
 lostnfoundluv
Joined: 1/10/2009
Msg: 36
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 11:41:18 AM
I expect only men of certain age who hate facebook should answer her question !
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 37
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Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 12:37:26 PM
I do not hate facebook and answered the question.....;)

I am not one to text all the time either, but use texting as another tool for communicating, just like I use certain social sites like POF for specific tasks, but I do not have one general site that is a collecting garbage can for everything I have done or care to share with the world out there!

There are a number of friends of mine that have been insulted, hurt, left relationships and even marriage because of things said or seen on facebook, and I for one respect others' privacy and hope that they respect mine!!

Now, if you want to know me, pick up the phone and call me, email me, or set up a time to meet and talk!!

cd
 Tarnished_Knight
Joined: 3/5/2009
Msg: 38
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Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 1:32:35 PM
I debated about whether to wade into this roiling pool; yeah, I think I lost the debate.

Women are more relational; men, eh, perhaps not so much (or at least not in the same way).
FB, by its very nature appeals to that relational nature for a lot of people. Yes, it does have other uses, but its purpose from the git-go was to provide a conduit for connection.
I, being the curmudgeon that I am, do not need that conduit for connection.
I, being the paranoid sob that I am, have problems with their definition of privacy. For FB to survive, grow, and prosper in a manner that profits its investors, has to minimize, if not totally throw out, most elements of privacy that Men (folk) of a certain age are accustomed to. I have no desire for personal info about me to voluntarily appear on the net; I have no desire for my image, or any facsimile there of, to appear on the net; I am a private person who shares who I am pretty much only face to face. What little digital interaction I take part in here is about as much as I wish.

FB, rather than connecting people, encourages distance. In addition to at least one example provided earlier, I have this one. I have a sister who once she got on FB thinks that her sum total of her outreach to family must occur through FB. I do not have a recollection of any communication with this sister over the past five + years since she became acquainted with FB other than a brief face to face last year. Despite numerous cards, etc., over the years naught has been returned. I can provide other examples were I of a mind to do so.
Such behavior is akin to parents driving around town with their child(ren) who have the idiotic notion that the person on the other end of the cell is more important than interaction with their offspring next to them.

Technology has its uses and benefits, but not when it comes at the sacrifice of what is important and necessary.

TK
[Yes, I have a FB account, several if that's important. I don't remember the last time I visited, er, connected]
 Thornz2000
Joined: 1/2/2012
Msg: 39
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 2:34:35 PM
Facebook is designed for data mining is all.
All intel on everyone and who knows who and what is going on in all your lives.
Once you post anything on Facebook its stored in massive data centers.

This is mainly ran by CIA............................................

Enjoy................................................
 Sealady111
Joined: 4/1/2013
Msg: 40
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 4:47:47 PM
I have found the opposite.

So may I turn the question around?

Why do men of a certain age ... or anyone for that matter ...
want to publish every minor detail of their lives on the internet?

I have had men on meets and dates want to take photos of the 2 of us to put on Facebook.
I always say no.
Plus I have asked real friends to remove photos they have published of me without my permission.

Once it is published on the internet it is there forever.

The same goes for asking to be Facebook friends...
Why would you want to be Facebook friends with someone you see in real life?

And why do people try to invite me to a party via facebook?
Why not pick up the phone and call me, or tell me next time we see each other or send me an email or an invitation via snail mail or popped under my door or in my letterbox?

I do have Facebook mainly to stay in touch with overseas family and friends.
 Giggles10000
Joined: 2/17/2013
Msg: 41
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 5:38:55 PM
Why I love Facebook:

Lost my dogs--people shared a picture and a day later I had them back--they had traveled over 2 miles so the flyers I put up they would have never been found. Someone had taken them in so they weren't at the pound--Im 1005 confident without Facebook I never would have found them.

Found a dog and he was really old and need his medication, I posted his picture and ask my friends to share and two hours later he was home!

I can see what my kids are doing--(dang song lyrics they post get me everytime!) Not the yes mom I am fine but who they interact with and how they really are--where their head is. It's awesome!

Found out a whole group of POF men were married or living with someone by putting their email address into the search bar--it works better than google, when I asked them why they were on a dating site and it said they were in a relationship or married it was the same answer--things weren't working out --well doh you are on a dating site!

Some people from my hometown and I talk regularly on Facebook chat. Chat feature works better than this one.

Some of the forum posters are my friends--well about 40 of them! I love their up building positive energy--I know about their life and I have never met them. Once one had some financial difficult someone sent out a message and as a group we figured out a way to help them.

But the best thing for me, I am helping a group of artists, not your normal breed of artists but good people who have all had BAD, VERY VERY BAD things happen to them and the art is like therapy to them. We have a Gallery and the only way for the past 18 months we have advertised it was on Facebook. The event last Friday had over 7k people invited to it. These people have grown in love and spirit so much it is amazing to watch them develop and put the things in the past --in the past, and move their life forward. Also amazing is when someone else comes into the Gallery and sees some of their work and it validates them as well. We are now a non-profit and applying for our 501C so we can get tax-exempt donations. Most of the original artists I got off Facebook, where they would post something they had just made.

There are groups that sell things--I sold my old furniture on Facebook.

Meetup groups, events, and the City of Knoxville had an meeting last week about availability of internet access downtown--yep--Facebook was how it all started, local guy names all the key players and asked what they planned to do about the situation, he set up a meeting after the Mayor answered him on Facebook. Free internet coming soon to Downtown!!!! How awesome.

Did you hear how some countries in the Middle East had a revolution and it was basically because of Facebook allowing them to coordinate things?

We want as we age to limit ourselves but sometimes we need to open our eyes and see the POSITIVE possibilities vs just being to afraid to try something. The world is changing.

Companies are now hiring directly off Facebook, there are apps that you can go to their site from their Facebook page to apply for a job.

Companies give away free products to get you to try them.

Laughs, giggles, off beat humor, whatever you like in life there is something out there that someone else likes and has made and it is up to you to just enjoy it.

Personally interacting with others or watching Tv by myself--Ill take the interaction and it is better than soggy emails from dating sites for me atm.
 BLONDE_ANGEL845
Joined: 6/30/2012
Msg: 42
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 5:53:22 PM
^^^ Awesome post, Mark Zuckerberg should give u a million for it!
all nice positive things, if u live a clean life & only post decent stuff u will have nothing to hide...I found distant cousins on FB & people I knew from when I lived in NYC years ago...would never have done it any other way!
 Deepseaceecee
Joined: 1/29/2013
Msg: 43
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 5:59:27 PM
They dont hate it, just wary of it I guess. I also like it but you have to be smart and learn how to manage it. THese men may have things to hide, did you think of that? Work of the devil, is an over-reaction and have to wonder why lol! Why dont you ask them instead of us??
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 44
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 6:30:36 PM
giggles,
Why I love Facebook:

Lost my dogs--people shared a picture and a day later I had them back--they had traveled over 2 miles so the flyers I put up they would have never been found. Someone had taken them in so they weren't at the pound--Im 1005 confident without Facebook I never would have found them.


Good story, maybe I will put more effort into FB in the future, some friends I seldom see are on connected to me.
 Proteaus
Joined: 6/9/2009
Msg: 45
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 6:42:52 PM
Since I am not a trendy person ,I have absolutely no interest in face book . You do realize sites like that make money by selling your personal info ? My little sister had me make a acct which I try to check once every 2 weeks or so .
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 46
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 6:57:22 PM

^^^ Awesome post, Mark Zuckerberg should give u a million for it!


I agree... Giggles you mentioned so many positive aspects of using Facebook....things I hadn't even thought of, like advertising items for sale, lost and found...wow.

For me....I haven't used the site to look up whether or not someone was married, but it's a good idea just the same.


Some of the forum posters are my friends--well about 40 of them! I love their up building positive energy--I know about their life and I have never met them. Once one had some financial difficult someone sent out a message and as a group we figured out a way to help them.


Yes...I've gotten to know some of my forum friends a lot better through Facebook and I do love the chat feature over there as well.

And....as was mentioned, I can see what my kids are up to. A couple of years ago I was shocked to see a cigarette in my daughter's hands. I always thought she didn't smoke. The things a parent finds out about their kids hehe.

...mae
 afitdancer
Joined: 8/30/2012
Msg: 47
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/7/2013 8:10:20 PM
I have facebook....twitter....tumbler ....deviantart.....oh and I write letters...and I even pick up the phone.
 Verpflichtet
Joined: 2/10/2013
Msg: 48
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/8/2013 6:32:06 AM
Facebook is a soul sucker, but that being said I use it as my diary and so I can post pictures of the awesome burrito I am about to eat. Facebook and Icanhascheezburger.com are my favorite time waster sites.
 Verpflichtet
Joined: 2/10/2013
Msg: 49
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/8/2013 6:33:03 AM
oh and this site, apparently, when it comes to finding dates hahaha.
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 50
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/8/2013 7:27:28 AM
^^^^ Thanks for the morning chuckle.

My cousin and her sister have started a group for family members only. I like that because the stuff we share is keep private from the general public. I just found out that my cousin's husband is going through chemo and my niece who had so many problems growing up now has got her life back on track and has become LPN. So proud of her. I had kinda lost track of the family over the years....living so far away, we lose touch.

I've read about all the horror stories regarding Facebook but with anything you put out there, caution and care are paramount.

...mae
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