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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 theritefoot
Joined: 3/30/2013
Msg: 101
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?Page 5 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
I hate FB, and closed my account.
You have to be a geek to take pics of what you're doing every five minutes and post it for the world to see.
It's NUTS.
 brisco414
Joined: 4/20/2012
Msg: 102
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/12/2013 6:12:54 AM
FB is severely flawed. I have an account but only to keep up (photos) with my kids and extended family.
 classicwalnut
Joined: 11/30/2011
Msg: 103
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/12/2013 4:17:02 PM
Agree, I gain my satisfaction by what I do. My ex prefers to talk to everyone via facebook. I don't understand why someone can spend 12 hours writing on other people's wall. I don't write on other's wall in facebook, something not right about it to me.
 Giggles10000
Joined: 2/17/2013
Msg: 104
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/12/2013 6:38:49 PM
Oh snap--I just made $100 selling stuff I don't want any more from one of the Facebook Groups--and because it is Fecebook--unlike Craigslist I know who I was meeting before I met them!

Another time one of the ladies that use to post alot on Facebook visited the USA--she had an issue with a product and went back to where she purchased them. The store gave her no satisfaction--she went to another branch of the same store and they also refused to help her. She made a status update and tagged the store in it, of course her friends commented on the bad treatment she received and the stores corporate office literately wrote on her wall to apologize and give her satisfaction in the terms of $$$--so yea--you can do lots of wonderful things!
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 105
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/12/2013 7:36:52 PM

--and because it is Fecebook--


Heehee ... You said Fecebook ...

$100 is not enough for me to risk my privacy on such sites.
I'd rather donate my old stuff to Goodwill or ARC.

People just have to decide if the risk is worth it.
For some people the risk is negligible.
For others, not so much.
 deere_rancher
Joined: 4/4/2012
Msg: 106
view profile
History
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/12/2013 7:45:17 PM
People just have to decide if the risk is worth it


Exactly .!
I have had a risk assessment with professionals regarding FB
For me , The benefits are not worth the risks

And I enjoy the peace of mind , knowing, since there's nothing
on FB , there's nothing to ever come back on me .

 Giggles10000
Joined: 2/17/2013
Msg: 107
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/13/2013 4:50:39 PM


Exactly .!
I have had a risk assessment with professionals regarding FB
For me , The benefits are not worth the risks [/quote

So exactly how is Facebook more risky than PlentyofFish?

Again you control every bit of it--what and who sees anything--the people fired over what they posted had to post it for others to see... You post pictures of yourself and your family on here >< You height, body type, education, city and state where you live, marital status, a whole wealth of information that ANYONE--not just those with a pof account can see--atleast with Facebook the only thing people can determine about you are things you have allow thru your security settings...

See this is what bothers me that those who dont like something want to make up these excuses about Privacy and yet here they are with all this information on a dating site for anyone to see...when I hear things like this makes my trust issue go all BINGO--dude is either a player and has too many involved with him that he don't want them to find out about each other, has a signifcant other, or something else is going on but don't say you are trying to protect your privacy when you are on an online dating site!
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 108
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/13/2013 5:25:23 PM
facebook is a far more appealing target than Pof (though Pof was hacked a few years back). The scary part of Fb is the "affinity " relationship you have with your "friends." Hackers love that sh!t.
"In the '90s, scammers used e-mail," says Michael Argast, a security analyst at Sophos, an antivirus software company. "Today, it's social networking." Argast explains that although people have been trained not to click on suspicious e-mails, they don't operate with the same sense of caution when presented with a link on Facebook or Twitter. Maybe that's why the number of phishing attacks on these kinds of sites — in which people are fishing for account information, as opposed to infecting your computer with a virus — has skyrocketed recently, from 4,600 attacks in 2007 to 11,000 in 2008. This year doesn't look any better, with 6,400 attacks in the first three months of 2009. (Read "How Not to Be Hated on Facebook: 10 More Rules.")

Like anything on the Internet, Facebook has never been completely scam-free, but its privacy settings may create a false sense of security: most users can't interact with one another unless they are "friends" or belong to the same general network. The site at first glance would also seem less of a gold mine for swindlers since unlike financial websites, which offer access to victims' bank accounts, there is no direct financial gain from hacking into a Facebook account. But the bad guys know that many of us are lazy or forgetful and use the same password on multiple sites. In early 2008, Facebook noticed a marked increase in the number of scams. "We're the most effective distribution platform on the Internet," says Ryan McGeehan, the company's incidence-response manager. "The level of person-to-person connection doesn't exist anywhere else. And as we get bigger, we become a bigger target."

http://www.time.com/time/business/article/0,8599,1895740,00.html


atleast with Facebook the only thing people can determine about you are things you have allow thru your security settings...
Then rest easy. Some of us would find it deficient, because a hacker can find your Friends (schools/ year of graduation), co-workers (place of employment) and other tasty info because YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER OTHERS' CONTENT OR SETTINGS.

I did set up an account (using someone else's email) for our high school reunion a few years back and was appalled at the lack of understanding many people had re: their settings and invitations they accepted (and forwarded).

See this is what bothers me that those who dont like something want to make up these excuses about Privacy and yet here they are with all this information on a dating site for anyone to see.


Seriously? Why would you expect a person who is concerned with privacy to confirm or deny their info?
The only reason I can imagine to participate in fb would be as who I am, so that I can connect with those I actually know.

There are now new privacy concerns with the recent Droid Fb "home."

http://m.techradar.com/news/software/applications/facebook-looks-to-calm-facebook-home-privacy-concerns-1143013

You are welcome to believe that people are "making up" things because they don't want to use Fb (they don't like it), but I don't like it BECAUSE of some of the holes. The history is well known, and hacking will be a problem with any website. The popularity of a site and the juicy info it offers, determines its attractiveness to hackers.
People can take whatever precautions with their privacy with which they are comfortable. I do.
 forums1
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 109
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/13/2013 5:38:05 PM

The only men I have met on pof who don't care for FB (and communicate that rather severely) are not great at navigating online and/or a little (to a lot) rough around the edges in person too.


That one just makes me laugh, what a horrible generalization. FYI, I work in IT and support fairly large websites (although I'm sure not as large in terms of 'user base' as Facebook)... yet I have a very basic cell phone (no 'smart' phone like android, iphone, etc - no, I don't need to carry the internet with me 24/7), and I don't use "fakebook" very often. I'd rather go for a walk or something, and be 'out of touch' with the world for a while, than have it strapped to my hip and be posting my every action/feeling on it. I 'navigate' just fine online though - my job rather requires it.
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 110
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/13/2013 5:46:56 PM
^^^ Yes. People in the IT world who may be involved in very large and very complex systems often need respite from the stress of dealing with the mental demands of trouble shooting and hyper-vigilance for the performance of systems for which they bear responsibility.

Many such people become Luddites in their personal lives.
 deere_rancher
Joined: 4/4/2012
Msg: 111
view profile
History
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/13/2013 6:44:13 PM
@ Giggles



<div class='quote'>So exactly how is Facebook more risky than PlentyofFish?
Its Obivious your not an expert , so pay for a session with security experts
I did .!




Again you control every bit of it--what and who sees anything

You have no control over what those people decide to do with the written manuscript you just provided them, or who they share it with




the people fired over what they posted had to post it for others to see

see above




when I hear things like this makes my trust issue go all BINGO--dude is either a player and has too many involved with him that he don't want them to find out about each other


This is because you have issues and preconceived ideals
and does no tnecessarily reflect the reality of the situation
 Giggles10000
Joined: 2/17/2013
Msg: 112
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/13/2013 11:44:18 PM
@ Deer Rancher

I am not the one who is assuming I don't know about facebook security and I am not the one making up things--I do not need a session with security experts--if there really are any REAL issues why not share it with everyone--(forums posts should be for the whole group of us not just me personally --I don't need your attention). Sorry if me calling you out about downing Facebook as a security risk while you are on a dating site makes you mad, but I feel you are wrong to try and make it be something it isnt--if you don't enjoy yourself on there --maybe you should examine why--poor choice of friends can be a big reason, I delete people who post constant negative things. I have found it to be a very positive experience and it has added so much to my life. I would hate for someone else who could enjoy it not to try it cause you feel you need to make up bad things about it. Just so you know you can set the security or privacy on a post so that only certain people see it...you can have Friends and then acquaintances and the acquaintances can be excluded from your posts. You can make groups of people, some are premade--ie family, so you could have 100's of pictures and have it set so that no one but you sees them--again you have complete control. If Im reading something online on my phone while waiting for an appointment and don't finish I post it on my page with the setting "Only Me" --no one else knows it is there and then I can read it later at my leisure and then delete it.

Again, you do have control --your settings can be set that no one other than your friends can see it and they can not share it with anyone else. I have people who share things on my wall for me to see that I can't reshare--so again --you are in complete control.

But lets think about those who got fired or had issues in custody--again if they didn't do anything they wouldn't get busted--ie you are blaming facebook for their actions when they have to actually do something WRONG to be fired or have a custody issue! How is that Facebook's fault and just so you know they don't have to have a Facebook--someone else could video it with their phone and put it on You Tube and they could still get in trouble.

The reality of the situation is you at one time had an issue with something online and now you think that anything you don't personally want to be involved with you can skate under this one time at band camp something bad happened--which isnt the case. .

Having pictures of infants on a dating site to me is a much more risky things, again your information you have posted on your POF account has more personal information than you have to use on Facebook, you can put as much or as little as you want. They don't even ask for height!!! But those who post older pictures are outed --those who are involved with someone else are outed--it is an excellent reference guide..a tool to use to see what type of person someone is.

Facebook can be a good experience for anyone who wants to spend a bit of time getting familiar with it and learning how it operates. I am taking classes at ETSU and media is a big part of all of these classes--ie meaning it is here to stay, it wont be going away so why not learn to use it now versus being handicapped by it at an older age.

For those who personally don't like it --just say hey I don't like it but quit trying to make up scary things to make yourself feel better.

I have good people who I follow on Facebook, every day I get to hear positive things about the good things happening in their lives, one lady today found a home for a rescue dog--it means the world to her. When a bad storm came thru and my power was off--I had a smart phone and could get updates from Facebook about what was going on. I follow the news on there. Stuck in traffic, one of the local guys will tell you on Facebook where the wrecks are and how to avoid them...right there when you can get off at that exit vs having just creep past it while waiting on the radio to say where the accident was.
 forums1
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 113
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/14/2013 2:50:06 AM

For those who personally don't like it --just say hey I don't like it but quit trying to make up scary things to make yourself feel better.


Actually, nothing either DS or DR said really was "made up". I personally don't like it that much, but then as DS said, I'm rather a Luddite (heh, not really, hey - I still use tech at home!) when the day is over and I'm not dealing with work (apps broken, security issues, etc), but nothing either of them said is "made up" or technically false.
 TheCoolGreenMoss
Joined: 9/13/2010
Msg: 114
view profile
History
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/14/2013 7:37:50 AM
For educational purposes only. I found it interesting, and thought others might as well.




Paranoid Personality Disorder
By Psych Central Staff

People with paranoid personality disorder are generally characterized by having a long-standing pattern of pervasive distrust and suspiciousness of others. A person with paranoid personality disorder will nearly always believe that other people's motives are suspect or even malevolent.

Individuals with this disorder assume that other people will exploit, harm, or deceive them, even if no evidence exists to support this expectation. While it is fairly normal for everyone to have some degree of paranoia about certain situations in their lives (such as worry about an impending set of layoffs at work), people with paranoid personality disorder take this to an extreme -- it pervades virtually every professional and personal relationship they have.

Individuals with Paranoid Personality Disorder are generally difficult to get along with and often have problems with close relationships. Their excessive suspiciousness and hostility may be expressed in overt argumentativeness, in recurrent complaining, or by quiet, apparently hostile aloofness.

Because they are hypervigilant for potential threats, they may act in a guarded, secretive, or devious manner and appear to be "cold" and lacking in tender feelings. Although they may appear to be objective, rational, and unemotional, they more often display a labile range of affect, with hostile, stubborn, and sarcastic expressions predominating. Their combative and suspicious nature may elicit a hostile response in others, which then serves to confirm their original expectations.

Because individuals with Paranoid Personality Disorder lack trust in others, they have an excessive need to be self-sufficient and a strong sense of autonomy. They also need to have a high degree of control over those around them. They are often rigid, critical of others, and unable to collaborate, and they have great difficulty accepting criticism [...]


Source: http://psychcentral.com/disorders/sx37.htm
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 115
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/14/2013 8:59:46 AM
While paranoia may or may not be an impetus for decision making, it does not make the reality of software security any less real. Also, being paranoid does not infringe on the right of an individual to assess risk and make decisions based on their own personal circumstances.

However, it may make others more comfortable in discounting the opinions of those thus labeled. I think the shrill reactions of people attempting to cope with some of the information posted in this thread speaks for itself.

Social networking presents a level of risk. That is a fact. Some people have more or less at "risk" in certain environments.

I actually find the people who respond by claiming those who simply point out the risks are claiming the applications are "bad" to be the ones who seem to have an over-reaction that appears to not be grounded in reality. Why people feel that, because others are free to make a choice about their Internet presence, makes them worthy of being accused of calling sites "bad" and, further, calling such people names is odd.

I don't see anyone here saying that others aren't free to make their own decisions. No one is trying to enlist others in their belief system (except, perhaps, for those who are attempting to deny the risks). Those who eschew fb are simply giving the reasons why. It's the people who disagree with them that are lashing out with putting words in others' mouths and calling names (even though it's done with a "disclaimer" ).

ETA: wouldn't you find those who make negative assumptions about others based on their (lack of) facebook activity to be the ones who exhibit paranoia?
 deere_rancher
Joined: 4/4/2012
Msg: 116
view profile
History
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/14/2013 9:49:34 AM

if there really are any REAL issues why not share it with everyone

Because thats what the experts are for . Every individual's situation is different ,
and so are the risks & liabilities


they have to actually do something WRONG to be fired or have a custody issue!

NO they don't..! They just have to put something in writting , that can be used against them


Sorry if me calling you out about downing Facebook as a security risk

Not only are there security risk ,but liabilities as well , and those greatly increase for someone as myself , who has employees


Again, you do have control --your settings can be set that no one other than your friends can see it and they can not share it with anyone else

Do you not understand that you only have control over your settings , the people who see your post, are free to copy and share your post or other info it with anyone they want(no control)


Facebook can be a good experience for anyone who wants to spend a bit of time getting familiar with it and learning how it operates.

Again with your "one size fits all" mentality


For those who personally don't like it --just say hey I don't like it but quit trying to make up scary things to make yourself feel better

All of the listed ARE scary things to me , all have happened , none are made up

facebook postings have been used against men in the following
To file divorce procedings, In divorce settlements , In criminal cases
in custody battles, In civil cases, terminating a relationship, proof of infidelity
child support payments increases, reason for terminating employment ,
reason not hired ......and on and on
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 117
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/14/2013 10:33:00 AM

they have to actually do something WRONG to be fired or have a custody issue!

NO they don't..! They just have to put something in writting , that can be used against them


If you live in a state that has "Right to Work" labor laws, you can be fired from your job for no reason at all, and you have no recourse to fight it. The Right to Work laws should have been called "Right to Be a Slave With No Civil Rights", but that's another story. What seems to be very popular among the late teens and 20-something crowd is posting pictures on FB where the person is at a bar or party and very drunk and acting and looking like an a-hole. The younger people are very proud of these pictures and show it off like a badge of honor. If a boss or HR person gets a hold of these pictures, it could mean the end of a job or job interview. Like was said earlier, anything you put into cyber space is fair game for the rest of the world to see, no matter how private you think it is. A person interviewing you can ask to have access to your FB account to see what type of stuff is on there, and if you refuse, then no job .
 Giggles10000
Joined: 2/17/2013
Msg: 118
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/14/2013 12:48:59 PM
We are talking apples and oranges-- It is not the posting ...it is what is posted... you can post whatever you want on facebook--the posting will never get you in trouble UNLESS what you are posting is wrong to start with...ie you have to be doing something wrong--so back to facebook being a great guide to the character of a person. No one has ever been fired for posting they found a lost dog, have a good day, pictures of their flowers, kids, pets, funny (not off colored) menes, events, but for maybe calling in sick and then some place tagging them in an event--love the kid who said his grandmother died to get the weekend off and then when to Boonooro and posted pictures. Now while Facebook was mentioned there would have been other reasons, who gets a tan at their grandmother's funeral? Someone else he works with could have saw him there...but having a picture is more solid evidence and that is why people say Facebook got them in trouble--no it didn't ...they got themselves in trouble.

At no time have I ever said there is not risks being online--there is ...just like there is to go to the store and buy milk...car accident or being robbed...there is always a risk...I asked how is Facebook more of a security risk than being on POF with an infant---that was never answered other than ask an expert...but you admitted you asked an expert but won't back it up with what was said about why facebook is different than a dating site, cause I would bet the dating site was also included in what the expert told you and that was simply my point--how is the risk greater for facebook than a dating site? What exactly did the expert say the different is?

I stated that you had to do something WRONG to be fired or have a custody issue--you said NO they don't and then you list this proof of infidelity so I guess you do not think infidelity is wrong? Profiles on dating sites have also been used in court in divorce. Again if you aren't engaging in illegal or otherwise wrong activities then there is no harm that can be done posting on facebook.

Unless you are breaking the law you can not be liable for anything --there has to be a basis for legal action --posting on facebook will not make you liable unless what you are posting makes you liable--so again it is your actions and not facebook that is the issue.

Again you are wrong there are setting where others can not copy your post -- they simply can not hit "share" cause the option is not there. They can like it and they can comment on it but they can not share it with anyone else. Lots of new privacy settings have recently been installed.

I live in a "right to work state" and yes a company can let you go cause they don't like how you hold your mouth when you said good morning. Yes, it sucks but the times facebook has been mentioned as a reason is not cause the person was positive or happy but was saying things they shouldn't about who employed them or engaging in activities that a hiring manager or employer would question and more is about illegal drug activities that most here realize. Again all things I would want to know before getting involved with someone.

But off all the things you said ...there is one line that speaks loudly facebook postings have been used against men in the following--not against people but men.....

Oh yea I forgot if someone lies about their age--it shows up on Facebook ...again something wrong--lying ...

Now for the over 90 people here on POF that are my friends on Facebook--most will tell you that if it is off the wall questionable humor Ill post and share it...I don't care, so yea I have more freedom as a college student than most I can pretty much get away with what I want without negative feedback...so when I met someone online I do direct them to my facebook to make sure they understand who I am and any preconceived notions they might have of me will simply disappear...that is another reason I like Facebook...I can be myself and have someone like me for who I am...not what they imagine me to be...it is very freeing.
 forums1
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 119
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/14/2013 12:57:13 PM

For educational purposes only. I found it interesting, and thought others might as well.

Paranoid Personality Disorder
By Psych Central Staff

People with paranoid personality disorder are generally characterized by having a long-standing pattern of pervasive distrust and suspiciousness of others. A person with paranoid personality disorder will nearly always believe that other people's motives are suspect or even malevolent.

...


So I guess it would be Paranoid of me to suggest that someone who thinks they are an armchair psychiatrist, could be:


Grandiosity is chiefly associated with narcissistic personality disorder, but also commonly features in manic or hypomanic episodes of bipolar disorder.

It refers to an unrealistic sense of superiority, a sustained view of oneself as better than others that causes the narcissist to view others with disdain or as inferior. It also refers to a sense of uniqueness, the belief that few others have anything in common with oneself and that one can only be understood by a few or very special people.


But hey, maybe its just my paranoia. I'm not really a psychiatrist - I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express a few times though.
 deere_rancher
Joined: 4/4/2012
Msg: 120
view profile
History
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/14/2013 2:25:14 PM

posting will never get you in trouble UNLESS what you are posting is wrong to start with...ie you have to be doing something wrong


Guilty No !... All you have to do , is post or upload a pic , that can be used against you ,
There's no shortage of vindictive people , lawyers and profiteers,
who will twist the meaning to exaggerate reality
 forums1
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 121
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/14/2013 5:52:37 PM
posting will never get you in trouble UNLESS what you are posting is wrong to start with...ie you have to be doing something wrong


Senator Joe McCarthy? Is that you? I hope that's just a disguise, otherwise you might be exhibiting some communist leanings with those dresses and such. And obviously everyone you accused back in the 50's was guilty of doing something wrong... nobody in all of history has ever been accused of wrongdoing unjustly.
 ladywilltravel
Joined: 8/25/2012
Msg: 122
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/17/2013 11:06:30 AM
I have to agree with post #134. Some women don't like Facebook, either. Anything posted on the world wide web is out in the world permanently. It's pretty simple to find info on the internet. Our private lives are no longer as private as they once were; why make it easy for those with questionable motives.
 theritefoot
Joined: 3/30/2013
Msg: 123
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/17/2013 9:32:05 PM
I don't know how old you are OP< but I hate FB. I tried to like it, but it's BS.
Frankly, as much as I care for some of the folks who were my FB friends, I don't WANNA know
where they're having dinner, i don't WANNA see the plate of food....good grief.

It's just SILLY.

If you're a born attention whore you'll love FB. But even then it must occur to the most seasoned attention whore
that FB is taking up almost ALL OF YOUR TIME!

I was on FB for a few years, and i don't miss it at all. Now, I contact the people who really matter and i spend time with them.

EASY!
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 124
view profile
History
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/19/2013 11:48:41 PM
Someone I know and care for very much was just robbed....and I attribute it to "twitter" and "Facebook." I never thought it was smart to post photos of your expensive items on Facebook for the world to see, and then "tweet" your whereabouts. And I think I might be right, for once!
 csamcsog
Joined: 4/8/2013
Msg: 125
Why do Men of a Certain Age HATE Facebook?
Posted: 4/20/2013 1:00:12 AM
I think I dislike faithbook because it steals my identity, it looks into my soul deep down, then rummages aroun inside and pulls out the more valuable memories and runs away with it.

i don't like face book because I don't like people. I have become the moody, humourless cynic I knew I would never become, and I now hate people. I hate men, I hate women, I hate my old one-time friends, I hate my class mates, I hate my children, my exes, my old lovers, my youth, my ideals, my dreams. I hate god most of all, and the Internet is our new god. It has successfully superseded scientists and physicians, and stock borkers as a brand new god of a braver, faster-moving, hatful world. Yes, full of hats.

I don't like faithbook because I am a huge giant of a failure. I don't want to be reminded of this by my friends, lovers, and my brother, who all have gone on to great success in their lives and I am left behind to sit in the stinking dirt.

So... that's why I dislike faithbook.
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