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 AUTHOR
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 47
Learned my lesson dating a single parent Page 3 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)

(flyyinsolo87) Your life could have changed as drastically as her had if you had gotten pregnant that one time you had sex.


That still doesn't make her a hypocrite. She could reasonably be expected to wipe her brow, grin and say, "Phew, dodged a bullet *THERE*!!!", but that still is nothing remotely close to the definition of a "hypocrite".

We get it: you don't like her. You're allowed (really, you are!). But, you're calling her something she isn't, and you can't back it up when challenged on it.


Also, the judgement you place on others I believe to be a sin, and you are judging them for sinning.


And, I *DON'T* believe that judging is a sin. So there.
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 48
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/14/2013 12:04:07 PM
We get it you don't believe judging is a sin, but there others, like my self, who do. Good thing is you cannot dictate, or change, what I believe. So there. Now, being that you are so very smart, tell me what exactly is a hypocrite?


VVVV-- Newwave, my main problem is that you criticized others for not keeping it their pants, then you stated that 'you never said you were a virgin'. Which means, at one point you couldn't keep in your pants. Also, if it weren't for the fact that you referred to single parents as disgusting and you stated exactly what you did below, I would not have a problem.

You also couldn't pay me to put my child up for adoption regardless of whether his father is involved. Thank goodness, his father is there for him as much as I am and we have a very good working relationship.
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 50
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/14/2013 10:36:35 PM

I will quit judging when some of you stop having babies while on welfare that I pay for. Children deserve two parents and if the dad will not be around there is adoption. But nope, too many think nothing of having babies taxpayers support.


Stop pretending that you give a crap about what these children "deserve", when you couldn't care less. Stop pretending your judgment against single parents is all about having to pay taxes to support their children. That isn't your main beef with them. You resent single parents who support their own kids, too.

The truth is that you're jealous of single parents because they have children---while your window of opportunity to give birth has pretty much passed. In all likelihood, men that have never had any kids and want to start a family will pass you over in favor of younger women who are still in their prime child-bearing years. That's what really chaps your azz.
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 51
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/15/2013 6:12:47 AM
No you psycho, I don't care that men bypass me in their delusional of thinking they can get younger. I can still have a baby but unlike some of you I wouldn't just have kids with anyone. I don't want single dads to contact me because they aren't what I desire and I don't want to support their spawn or their ex.


You also pretend to be morally superior when you're not; you stoop to name-calling when you know you've been exposed and have no leg to stand on. I said nothing about single dads contacting you---what I said was that men who've never had kids wouldn't want you.

The very men that you would want to marry would not want to marry you. You might as well resign yourself to the fact that you'll have to either consider dating a man who's a single parent, or spend the rest of your days alone and childless. Your choice.
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 52
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/15/2013 6:21:05 AM
Newwave-- I want to ask you, do you really know what happens to children who are put up for adoption? For the majority of children put up for adoptions, they stay in the system till they turn 18. They are passed from family to family, some families are only in it for the stipend they receive. Some families are cruel. Many I know said that they were lucky when they went placed with a certain family because they were good unlike the rest. They don't know what real love is. They don't know their own worth as a human. Not to mention that unless you go through a private adoption, the process is long and grueling, and most of them are not adopted. There are people out there who would make great parents, but are denied because they fall short on some requirements that need to be met, like income. There is a lot to think about when deciding to put a child up for adoption.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 54
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/15/2013 1:16:24 PM

(flyyinsolo87) We get it you don't believe judging is a sin, but there others, like my self, who do. Good thing is you cannot dictate, or change, what I believe. So there. Now, being that you are so very smart, tell me what exactly is a hypocrite?


Glad to be of service, ma'am... (tips hat)

A hypocrite is someone who condemns something, but then behaves in a way that is in direct contradiction to what they have said they condemn.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 55
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/15/2013 1:22:40 PM

(halcyon_skies) (Msg. 68) Stop pretending that you give a crap about what these children "deserve", when you couldn't care less. Stop pretending your judgment against single parents is all about having to pay taxes to support their children. That isn't your main beef with them. You resent single parents who support their own kids, too.

The truth is that you're jealous of single parents because they have children---while your window of opportunity to give birth has pretty much passed. In all likelihood, men that have never had any kids and want to start a family will pass you over in favor of younger women who are still in their prime child-bearing years. That's what really chaps your azz.

(Msg. 70) You also pretend to be morally superior when you're not; you stoop to name-calling when you know you've been exposed and have no leg to stand on. I said nothing about single dads contacting you---what I said was that men who've never had kids wouldn't want you.

The very men that you would want to marry would not want to marry you. You might as well resign yourself to the fact that you'll have to either consider dating a man who's a single parent, or spend the rest of your days alone and childless. Your choice.


Now, this is what I like to see: unbridled, unpretentious hostility, without all the ****-footin'-around of calling her something that she's not! Plus, guys always like to see wimmin mixing it up!
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 56
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/15/2013 1:57:35 PM
So, how would you describe a woman who made the mistake of having sex once when she was not ready condemning a person who also made the same mistake but the only difference is a pregnancy resulted? Now that is just an assumptions seeing as how I could never truly know exactly how many times or with how many partners the woman had sex.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 57
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/16/2013 9:28:22 AM

(flyyinsolo87) So, how would you describe a woman who made the mistake of having sex once when she was not ready condemning a person who also made the same mistake but the only difference is a pregnancy resulted?


If she had had sex once when she wasn't ready, and never did so again (ie, have sex when she wasn't ready), I'd call her someone who had learned from her mistake. If she had had sex once when she wasn't ready, and CONTINUED to do so, I'd describe her as someone who HADN'T learned from her mistake; I'd probably call her a big dummy. I certainly wouldn't call her a hypocrite, because there's nothing hypocritical in there.

See, doing something stupid, then never doing it again because you realize it was stupid, and speaking out about it, isn't hypocritical. If she's trash-talking single parents, that makes her small-minded and mean-spirited, but it does *NOT* make her hypocritical. Words in English actually *MEAN* things; you can't just throw out any word, because it's big and scary-sounding, and hope like crazy that no one will notice...
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 58
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/16/2013 9:44:53 AM
I see where you are going Arlo. I guess I felt that she was hypocritical in her condemning people for not keeping in their pants when she wasn't a virgin because that's how I was taught the word to mean. But then again, I never said the people raising me were geniuses. By the way, thanks for adding me as a favorite.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 59
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/16/2013 12:58:44 PM

(flyyinsolo87) By the way, thanks for adding me as a favorite.


You're welcome. What can I say? I have a fondness for smart women.
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 60
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/16/2013 1:44:19 PM
You're so full of it.

Compliments I mean.
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 62
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/16/2013 4:36:42 PM
If she had had sex once when she wasn't ready, and never did so again (ie, have sex when she wasn't ready), I'd call her someone who had learned from her mistake. If she had had sex once when she wasn't ready, and CONTINUED to do so, I'd describe her as someone who HADN'T learned from her mistake; I'd probably call her a big dummy. I certainly wouldn't call her a hypocrite, because there's nothing hypocritical in there.

See, doing something stupid, then never doing it again because you realize it was stupid, and speaking out about it, isn't hypocritical. If she's trash-talking single parents, that makes her small-minded and mean-spirited, but it does *NOT* make her hypocritical. Words in English actually *MEAN* things; you can't just throw out any word, because it's big and scary-sounding, and hope like crazy that no one will notice...


I would say she was "self-righteous", since she was condemning people for having made the same "mistake". Just because pregnancy occurred in the others didn't mean they didn't learn from their "mistakes", too. It didn't make them "disgusting" or "trash", as she had referred to another single woman with a child in a different thread.
 GhostJaguar
Joined: 3/5/2013
Msg: 63
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/21/2013 6:43:18 PM
Best advice I ever read:

"Treat single mothers like Chernobyl; deadly to enter, and radioactive for miles around."

Also saw a great T-shirt: Not my sperm, not my problem.
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 65
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/22/2013 6:23:01 AM

Best advice I ever read:

"Treat single mothers like Chernobyl; deadly to enter, and radioactive for miles around."

Also saw a great T-shirt: Not my sperm, not my problem.


Technically, she's not a single mother. She's still married, and with as much info as the OP gave, for all we know, they could still be living together. Which again would negate her single mother status. I don't know for sure that they do, but I will bet money that they still live together considering how flighty she's portrayed to be.
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 66
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/28/2013 5:48:49 AM
^^^^^^ who was this directed at? I'm just wondering.
 buterfly1978
Joined: 4/23/2013
Msg: 67
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 5/28/2013 8:15:09 PM
Not all single moms are like that. You are also correct, when a person is truly interested they will find time for that someone special. Don't let a few bad apples spoil the whole bunch.
 Kigstar
Joined: 2/6/2013
Msg: 68
view profile
History
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 6/5/2013 10:47:15 AM
never ever date single parents if you dont have kids of your own! The Chernobyl advice is spot on, stay away for at least 20,000 years
 spilling_fire
Joined: 7/3/2011
Msg: 69
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 6/17/2013 1:53:29 PM

I don't neg on people; I correct the sloppy misusage of grammar. I feel like the solitary bastion of civil discourse, contending against the unwashed barbarian hordes who are trying to slaughter the English language... well, not on *MY* watch!



I thought I stood alone in my mission. Alas, I have a comrade!
 sparklingdiana
Joined: 2/3/2013
Msg: 70
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 6/25/2013 9:24:21 AM
RUN FOREST RUN!!!
 SwtCake
Joined: 6/1/2012
Msg: 71
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 6/28/2013 1:11:47 PM
Not all single parents are the same! Why I would even need to say that is like, really?!
 barnabyjames1
Joined: 1/11/2013
Msg: 72
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 6/28/2013 11:12:35 PM
^^^ So its not really, its "like" really? We're confused, please explain? Is it or is it not really?
 Madailein
Joined: 6/9/2012
Msg: 73
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 6/29/2013 2:15:29 PM
1960’s president Lyndon Johnson created the “Great Society”. This Federal program guaranteed that every degenerate or pregnant woman who refused to work for a living would be afforded adequate maintenance, inclusive of housing, food, medical care and expendable income by the working class.

Martin L. King advocated, at that time, that Negros have as many children as possible;
“By sheer numbers we shall overcome”, King stated. Perhaps why his records were ordered sealed for 75 years.

Most persons are not against “Unwed” parents.
Taxpayers are against unwed, or even wed, parents that demand support for themselves and the children they choose to bring into the world while totally capable of earning a living.

Since when is pregnancy a disabling disease?

Why, if you decide, to have a child did you not also plan to provide for it?

Why, if you have accepted welfare and then gone on to deem yourself as successful and not needy of welfare have you not reimbursed, every cent you were provided (including housing subsidies, food stamps, Aid to dependant children and more) to the American taxpayers who supported you on your ride to success? Had you secured a student loan you would have had to pay it back; so why not your welfare ride?

It is now a well known fact that welfare is an entitlement deemed generational by certain members of society.

President Obama has demonstrated that he is supportive of benefits to those unworthy of help while curtailing necessary benefits to those who desperately need help; i.e. wounded vets, seniors.

OP, why would you be drawn into a false situation?
Are you that desparate for attention? Walk into the party with what expectations?
 Madailein
Joined: 6/9/2012
Msg: 74
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 6/29/2013 5:31:57 PM
Obviously you lack comprehension as to my assertions. Or do you?
Seems that you should know better.

You do not make sense in response to my statements.

Persons who reimburse, to quote you, “A fire truck” contributed to their debts whereas the welfare freeloaders did not.

Thank you for helping me illustrate my position.
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 1/22/2013
Msg: 75
Learned my lesson dating a single parent
Posted: 6/30/2013 12:12:10 PM
^^(&I'm curious who's running from what too...)

There is a huge difference between a single parent, and a single parent newly broken up and on the rebound while reeling.

The one has different components of their life that make some things a little less flexible; but they also have more understanding for other people in the same condition; and they still do make time if they find value in it.

The other oftentimes think they're ready, they think they kno what they want, but they actually don't; and while they don't "intend" to hurt anyone while they try and get a little bit of self worth back or not be alone; they are thinking about their own hurts; their own transitions, their own kids; and they frequently do end up getting in too deep and then changing their mind (this is definitely not just women; this is anyone with kids or with no kids; going through a separation or divorce. You are there to make them feel better; they don't oftentimes have much to give back to you. Especially those with vulnerable kids; the kids take their emotional energy.

So while single parents are not someone that can be lumped in one category as there are a ton of different types of parenting (shared, co, sole custody, etc.) with different styles of dating and parenting and merging; there is a lot more commonality with people who are very beginning stages of separation or divorce. It is incredibly difficult to navigate a successful relationship while emotionally reeling and transitioning into a completely different part of life; without any of the fallout from the former getting dragged into the current. There is a reason there is such a high rate of fail for the rebound relationship. Some ork; most unfortunately don't.

Glad though you're not lumping all single parents together and are learning as you go; there are some incredible people ith kids. There are some great ones without. You'll find someone who clicks.

Good luck
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