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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > It's been a year, he won't give me oral!      Home login  
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 Hamilton12345
Joined: 3/29/2012
Msg: 76
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!Page 4 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
larissan04, obviously you missed the part where she said that is not all that good. Why can;t they just have intercourse, well he seems to be enjoying his share of oral and getting off, but according to the OP, he doesn't even do enough for her to be ready.


That's another issue is he does not finger me at all either. He rubs my clit but it gets so sensitive I can't even get wet properly. He is very well endowed and I am sort of beginning to hate his big****because its bringing me more pain than pleasure. He won't finger me, he won't eat me out, he rubs my clit and then sticks it in and since I'm not even wet it hurts like hell. I now use lube every time we have sex because I can't stand him getting in me before I even have a chance to warm up.


OP, based on the post I am quoting, the guy is selfish pig who doesn't seem to care about you. Time to drop him and go find someone that does.
 ManOfAdventure28
Joined: 3/8/2013
Msg: 77
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It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/20/2013 11:39:25 AM
OP....have you tried drawing smiley faces and hearts around your vagina. Perhaps, hang an air freshner off your clit....you know, like the ones for cars.....
 jan1025
Joined: 3/23/2009
Msg: 78
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It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/20/2013 1:24:24 PM
OP,
You will never make him want to do something he doesn't enjoy doing, period.

As others mentioned here, some people like oral sex and other people don't. In your case you have a man that doesn't like to do it even if you hung air fresheners (had to laugh over that one), ribbons and bows he will still never do the act.

This is a great tragedy because this is some thing you desperately want and have thoughts about breaking up with him

I am not sure if I agree with the other posters on breaking up with him because of this... there are a lot of people who are addicted to sex and aren't even aware of it. It's called sex addiction, just like a drug addict, etc.

Now, maybe you should seek some counseling over this issue. Maybe, you will figure out if this is his problem or your problem and if you are justified by dumping him over it.

If I was you and I'm not, I would clearly see someone over this, maybe a sex therapist you both can see?

Jan
 cajuncooker
Joined: 3/3/2013
Msg: 79
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/21/2013 5:54:09 AM
boy meets girl. girl and boy fall in love. boy and girl date. boy and girl have monogomous ltr. boy and girl move in together. boy and girl should get married.
A long term living together situation is one step from marriage. Just like it without the paper.
ergo married to some degree
 ManOfAdventure28
Joined: 3/8/2013
Msg: 80
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It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/21/2013 5:56:37 AM

boy meets girl. girl and boy fall in love. boy and girl date. boy and girl have monogomous ltr. boy and girl move in together. boy and girl should get married.
A long term living together situation is one step from marriage. Just like it without the paper.
ergo married to some degree


Even Jerry Springer occassionally gives advice that is related to the topic.....
 csamcsog
Joined: 4/8/2013
Msg: 81
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/21/2013 6:01:41 AM
Well, if he don't give you oral, then give it yourself to yourself. If it's that big an issue. If it is, then you can do it if you put your mind to it. (Mind over matter.) If you don't want to do it, then it's obviously not that big of an issue. And if it's not that big of an issue, then suck it up and resing to it, or bite the bullet each time you suck one.

If the mountain won't go to Mohammed, then Mohammed must go to the mountain, as they say.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 82
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/21/2013 8:11:22 AM
I'm assuming you two have conversations and he talks to you. That's his version of giving you oral.
 aremeself
Joined: 12/31/2008
Msg: 83
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It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/21/2013 11:26:50 PM
reason number 247 to break up.
 GreenThumbz18
Joined: 4/25/2012
Msg: 84
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/21/2013 11:51:17 PM
Something smells fishy here, , ,
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 85
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 5:14:18 AM

And also I give him head for hours and frankly I'm tired of him not reciprocating.
\
Why the hell would you do THAT when he's such a selfish douche nozzle? Jesus.
 hounddoug
Joined: 3/21/2013
Msg: 86
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 6:08:01 AM

I love giving oral and she hates getting it. Some women are just like that I suppose


Well, now I can die happy knowing I've seen and heard it all. Really? I've never met one of those before. Hope I never do.

This entire thread reminds of of the story of Li'l Red Riding Hood. She was on her way to grandma's when out from behind a tree jumped the Big Bad Wolf. "Ha ha, Li'l Red Riding Hood!" he said. "I'm going to eat you up!" She threw her basket on the ground and said, "Eat, eat, eat! Doesn't anybody f*ck anymore?"

And to the following post:

You know now, the big penis thing is a myth and the best lover is a skilful, experienced generous,adventurous one


As the old saying goes, "It's not the size of the wand, but the magic in it."
 Paddy_o_Lantern
Joined: 5/24/2012
Msg: 87
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 7:06:56 AM

and the best lover is a skilful, experienced generous,adventurous one or if not a willing, enthusiastic learner who listens to your needs


Yes but if he does all that and he does not have a small penis I am sure he has a leg up on those who are not so well endowed - there is still alot to be said for having a good fit and that involves more than just personalities and lifestyles.
 justlookinflorida
Joined: 4/2/2013
Msg: 88
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 7:34:41 AM
I wouldn't have gone this long. I certainly would not have been giving it to him. I have always had the mindset you can't make a person enjoy what you enjoy. Regardless of how many times you ask him, if he's not comfortable doing it how much gratification would you get out of that anyway. I make it an absolute point to NEVER go into a sexual relationship with someone that does not enjoy what I most definately must have to fulfill me. You don't do it. You can't make them like it if they don't. If you are going to be sexually frustrated and if it has gotten to that point, move on.
 cajuncooker
Joined: 3/3/2013
Msg: 89
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 8:15:23 AM
Sex should not be what the relationship is based on and yes there is a good point about the wam bam thank you ma'am attiude. Sex is not supposed to be what drives our emotional and intmacey with someone. Sex is to be the outward greatness of an awsome relationship and love and closeness.
I know for me I dont care if a woman gives oral or not. I dont care if she is the worst in bed. If there is love and tenderness and the emotional is right then that comes out in great sex.
Not weather the person does oral or has a big pipe or has melons instead of fried eggs. Its not what that is about its about the love the closeness and the intimacey that is non sexual.
I am very leary when someone tells me they have a great sex life but cannot tell me what their signifigant other held a converstion about last night or the color of their spouses eyes. why because it shows there is no love
 Stubidooo
Joined: 12/30/2012
Msg: 90
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 11:07:05 AM

I know for me I dont care if a woman gives oral or not. I dont care if she is the worst in bed

The only guys who say crap like this are guys who aren't getting any
 hounddoug
Joined: 3/21/2013
Msg: 91
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 1:39:54 PM

I am very leary when someone tells me they have a great sex life


I don't ever remember telling others that I had a great sex life; I don't kiss-and-tell and it's none of their business.
 NinerV
Joined: 4/16/2012
Msg: 92
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 1:50:20 PM
OP, make a video of you fingering yourself to climax, maybe it will show him how much you can "get off" without him actually using his member.
 BabblingBrookes
Joined: 2/14/2013
Msg: 93
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 1:58:36 PM
You yourself said this is a big issue in your eyes. If it's bothering you now, it's going to bother you more later.

This is a toughie. On one hand, you don't want a guy to do something sexually he's not into...on the other hand, oral sex is a big part of intimacy for some people. Oral sex is a "take or leave it" for some of us...and an absolute necessity for others.

It sounds like you two just aren't sexually compatible. Oral sex isn't a sexual practice like dirty talking that a person can fake well even if they aren't into it. Who wants to feel like they taste disgusting? It's a total mood killer and hellish on the self esteem.

You need to have a sit down conversation with him outside of the bedroom about your needs. If you're open to compromising in this area of your life, then think of a compromise that will work for you. 1 minute of licking per sex session or something like that. It's your call to decide if you want to live your life without oral sex. If you can live your life without it, then great. You've already got a head start.
 aremeself
Joined: 12/31/2008
Msg: 94
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It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/22/2013 7:18:07 PM
no secrets about myself, but, some guys just don't like to do that!

put it in the wedding vows.
 Itsabigbadworldbaby
Joined: 4/18/2013
Msg: 95
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/23/2013 7:36:54 PM
Sweetie no ifs ands or buts, this man is taking advantage of you. I am in shock that you would allow him to just stick it in you when you aren't even wet and he has taken no time to even ensure you are aroused. I personally think it would serve him right if you bend him over and jam a broom handle up his ass with no lube. But I digress, sorry...

A good friend of mine used to say "We teach others how to treat us" Such is very much the case with this guy you have latched onto. The fact that you are even still with him really says more about you than him. Obviously your self esteem is low and on some level you feel like you don't deserve better treatment. But everyone deserves a partner who cares about them getting off. He sounds like a lousy lay and a worse person frankly and I hazard to guess that this innate narcissism of his is also affecting other areas of your relationship too if you really look objectively.

It is not really the lack of oral that makes you want to leave this guy. It is the fact that he just so clearly doesn't give a fiddler's f8ck if you are enjoying the intimacy or not. He just wants to nail you and get his own rocks off. He is a disgusting pig and you should run, NOT WALK, to your telephone, call him up and tell him it is over. Burn bridges to make sure you never go back with him.

Any guy who would do what you have described obviously has no empathy for you as a woman and not one unselfish bone in his body. And by the way, to the posters who claim you must smell or be unattractive in your private area, that is just so unfair and nasty. You already said you make sure to shower before the two of you go to bed, so what the hell is the problem? I am sure his sweaty balls as you go down on him don't exactly smell like roses, right? Two adults who care about each other can endure a little bit of a funky smell at times for their partner's pleasure. He is no adult, he is a little boy who thinks sex is just inserting A into B.

You already wasted too much time unfulfilled and now you know perfectly well what to do, that is why you posted here, but your self esteem is in such tatters due to how this animal has been using you like a c8m dump that you honestly feel like it's what you deserve. The hell with that! Kick his butt to the curb and don't ever look back.
 Cat*Eyes
Joined: 9/13/2006
Msg: 96
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It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/23/2013 7:51:25 PM
Doing Oral should not be a must do. Ask him and verbally inform him how to to use his fingers to please you in that right place. You just might find that a man who uses his fingers in that private place, is much more exciting than a boring random tongue activity. Everyone on pof and the forums. know, I am anti oral. A man's fingers touch is much more stimunating than a boring tongue. Either way you have to tell the man where you hot spot is and how you want it stimulated. There are some people as myself, who will NOT engaged in any oral activity. Sex is still exciting if you girls just show a man where and tell how to stroke your hot place and how you want that done. Most men do not know anything about stroking and touching or where that place is . We all must istruct them what we like.
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 97
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It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/24/2013 12:47:15 PM
^^^^^

Or the hot dog stand, if you're a guy ...
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 98
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It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/24/2013 1:35:47 PM
Have the man install a "bidet" in each and every bathroom you have and use it.......makes significant difference over just wiping, and much cleaner.....for both genders, and guess what.......the side benefit makes oral sex oh so much better!!

cd
 gentleplus
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 99
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It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/24/2013 3:52:03 PM
^^^^ did the bidet thing and yes what a difference for both genders... wow!!
 cherryyblossom
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 100
It's been a year, he won't give me oral!
Posted: 4/25/2013 5:58:28 AM
hehe, i wouldn't hesitate to give oral to a woman even though i have never done it yet
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