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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Not making a good first impression?      Home login  
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 Blueline294
Joined: 3/28/2012
Msg: 26
Not making a good first impression?Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Yes mamm, one floor up from here.
 tera8
Joined: 12/30/2012
Msg: 27
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Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/24/2013 11:52:51 AM
Gotcha..thanks....am new to any forum..guess I shud have checked it out better...have a great day!
 Blueline294
Joined: 3/28/2012
Msg: 28
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/24/2013 11:54:27 AM
Your welcome. Good luck on the quest.:)
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 29
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/24/2013 1:54:23 PM

I can't imagine someone asking to meet you again without saying "remember me", or they have so many that they have done the "meet and greet" with that your new pictures does not ring a bell with them compared to your meeting?


It happens CD......I went on a meet with a guy and six months later he contacted me again wanting to meet me. Huh?
I guess I didn't make a very good first impression the first time we went out...lol


I don't like being put on the back burner, forgotten and then resurrected because they're all out of options.


Don't you just hate that? I made a date to meet someone and he cancelled that afternoon. He actually told me he was meeting someone else. He said she was giving off all these "signals". His exact words. Turns out he was receiving all the "wrong signals." *snickers*

Then he has the nerve to message me again apologising profusely for being such a jerk but he will make it up to me. What the hell!!!! Couldn't believe he even thought I would go out with him after that.

I can't tell you how angry I was when he blew me off ....but guess what? Karma feels damn good sometimes. *evil grin*

...mae
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 2/24/2012
Msg: 30
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/24/2013 5:14:38 PM
^^ Mae - that's outrageous!

There have been a few I corresponded with who disappeared and then returned many months later as if we'd never met before. But it's only happened once where someone I'd actually met in person came back (a few years later) and didn't remember we'd met. Not too surprising though. The meet wasn't anything special - I'd been up most of the night working so was exhausted and he was taking a break between something like his daughter's soccer game and his son's something-or-other. I probably should have given him a chance but I didn't feel like it so I just replied that we'd already met. Never heard from him again.
 pamioakley
Joined: 5/26/2013
Msg: 31
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Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/24/2013 7:23:26 PM

Then he has the nerve to message me again apologising profusely for being such a jerk but he will make it up to me. What the hell!!!! Couldn't believe he even thought I would go out with him after that.


I had that experience also. I was puzzled when I went home from the meet because he seemed rushed. I had an email waiting from him when I returned home saying he wasn't interested. The next morning he had changed his mind. Are you kidding me? It was the shortest meet I'd ever been on! Which beckons that question... I haven't been recontacted by anyone I've met already but I haven't met that many men from POF. Perhaps I need to move one floor up too and see what's going on in MY profile!
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 1/22/2013
Msg: 32
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/24/2013 8:39:20 PM
Your pic IS a really nice one OP...

And yes, there are some people who between several dating sites and groups from in real life go out with MANY people, so it's not necessarily a reflection on you that they don't remember you.

You are wise though; if someone isn't smart enough to see you the first time around, wait and find someone who does :) (be curious to see if your one response remembers your coffee scenario eventually LOL)
 zippytwo
Joined: 6/7/2006
Msg: 33
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/24/2013 10:52:29 PM
Who knows what people expect on a coffee meet...I wonder sometimes if after the first 5 minutes they're still listening while they eyeball other women walking by.

Early on in my POF-life, I met one guy for coffee and we talked for 3 hours...it was all good. I then received an email from him saying there was nothing "sexual" for him...said I was very nice and funny...blah, blah, blah...and here I thought we were meeting for coffee to find out if we wanted to see each other again!

Also met with another fella, another 3 hour talk...it was all good. I guess he got the vibe from me that I wasn't wanting to go back to my place for an afternoon delight...geez Louise! He then contacted a woman I knew who found out he went out with a friend of hers and got what he was after.

When I figure out how to make a 'good impression' on a coffee meet, first I'm gonna get off of POF and then I'm gonna write a book called, "Making a Good Impression on POF" and make a million dollars and retire.
 LiterateHiker
Joined: 11/30/2012
Msg: 34
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/24/2013 11:01:02 PM
A man flew his private plane to meet me for lunch. Turns out he worked for logging companies clear cutting Washington State and Oregon for 30 years. I'm an environmentalist. We had a big argument about environmental issues during lunch. THE END... or so I thought.

A year later a man with a plane contacted me. I didn't recognize him from his new (distant) photos. He flew to meet me. When he walked into the airport my heart sank. It was the same man! The funny part was he didn't remember meeting me before. I was too amused to feel insulted.

It had snowed in the mountains the night before and dawned a beautiful, sunny day in early February. I decided to make the best of a bad situation. "Will you take me for a short plane ride?" I asked. "Where to?" he replied. "Let's fly over the Enchantments," I said. "I want to see the frozen lakes where I love to hike." We flew around Mt. Stuart (9,300'). I took over 60 beautiful photos of the mountains from the air. A memorable plane ride.
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 1/22/2013
Msg: 35
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/25/2013 6:43:36 AM
^^^ wow... that's a first, BOTH people not remembering the first meet LOL

Sounds like an interesting (and really pretty) second meet. So did you guys have a second one the second time around?
 Peppermint_Petunias
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 36
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Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/25/2013 9:59:38 AM
Your new pic looks a LOT different to me at a glance and your user name has changed.. I just happen to know your face.

The pic is very flattering.
Your hair is much more shiny/the light seems to be radiating a halo off of it ( men love shiny things ).
Its styled much more sophisticated and feminine than before.

Don't you know the body and your hair are what the majority of what men are looking at FIRST?

Most forget the face unless its absolutely stunning or absolutely horrible and not many of us of us are Angelina Jolie or Anne Ramse aka (Momma) from Throw Momma From The Train in the face.

Throw in the ones with ADD, dementia and bad eyesight.

It happens if I change my main also.

One slight difference in an inch of length, a high light, low light, flip up or down, how the bags are cut that month. I will look different to MOST men.








Don't have any repeats out there I want to hear from.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 37
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/25/2013 10:18:37 AM

Will you take me for a short plane ride?" I asked. "Where to?" he replied. "Let's fly over the Enchantments,"


Should have asked him to fly ya over the moonscapes he creates. At least then, the two of you would remember each,,,,,,forever.
 LiterateHiker
Joined: 11/30/2012
Msg: 38
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/25/2013 1:20:01 PM
^^^ Very funny, Walts!

The last thing I want to see is clear cuts: miles and miles of dead stumps and piles of branches with the hillsides sliding into the rivers and ocean. Destroyed wildlife habitat, too. Very sad.

Biologists have learned that clear cutting changes the chemistry of the soil, so far fewer and lesser-quality trees can grow there.
 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 40
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/25/2013 2:55:31 PM
I received the same form letter within 3 days from the same guy. It could be possible that they are just skimming the profiles and looking for a bite.
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 41
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/25/2013 4:01:25 PM

^^ Mae - that's outrageous!



It was too :)
He had "more crust than a custard pie"....lol

Just think of the entertainment value though...if these sorts of things didn't happen, how would I keep my friends amused ?
Dating.........it is what it is. I've always maintained that one needs a good sense of humour to remain on a dating site.

...mae
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 2/24/2012
Msg: 42
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/25/2013 4:21:06 PM
^^ singing to the choir! Amen sister
 Like2dance
Joined: 4/13/2013
Msg: 43
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Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 9/25/2013 4:43:24 PM
When I figure out how to make a 'good impression' on a coffee meet, first I'm gonna get off of POF and then I'm gonna write a book called, "Making a Good Impression on POF" and make a million dollars and retire.


Are you going to recommend that it is best to state one's actual age in his/her profile so there are no unpleasant surprises at a first meet?

At present a woman I know who is in her fifties and quite good looking understates her age by six years in her profile. When she meets men and they find out her actual age they lose interest in her on account of her lying. Laughably, she states in her profile she is looking for a man having integrity! Where is hers?

Frankly, I find it best to be honest in my profile about my age, height and weight.
 kissodeath
Joined: 9/20/2013
Msg: 44
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 10/22/2013 5:57:42 PM
I get grossed out seeing the same dudes message me the same dumb messages every time I delete and open a new profile. They are still here, for years, with the same loser messages.

I have never been approached by anyone I had a date with who didn't recognize me. They always end badly. I have had people message me after first dates where I wasn't interested in them. A few, actually. Possibly because I was polite in getting away.

Chalk it up to dumb. Remind them of things that didn't even happen on the date, mixed with things that did. Have fun with it. Share with friends. Write a blog.
 SWEET_MAVERICK
Joined: 9/28/2013
Msg: 45
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 10/24/2013 6:43:21 AM
OP, maybe the time has come for you to fish in a different pond.

I see so much immature, gamey behavior from both genders.

People value something they had to pay for than something they got for free.
 forumfella
Joined: 10/18/2013
Msg: 46
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 10/24/2013 8:26:55 AM
Great topic!
Funny I've had a lot of this lately, one lady inparticular I messaged last year a few times, no replies, no acknowledgment at the time...fast forward a year after hitting the gym, eating in moderation, 40 pounds less and more confidence, this same lady checks out my profile, messages me to say " hello we seem to have a lot of the same interests" the smarta$$ in me wanted to reply, it's the exact same written profile I had a year ago, there's just 40 pounds less of me to love, ahhh life can be funny. :)
 SWEET_MAVERICK
Joined: 9/28/2013
Msg: 47
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 10/24/2013 8:49:01 AM

fast forward a year after hitting the gym, eating in moderation, 40 pounds less and more confidence, this same lady checks out my profile, messages me to say " hello we seem to have a lot of the same interests" the smarta$$ in me wanted to reply, it's the exact same written profile I had a year ago, there's just 40 pounds less of me to love, ahhh life can be funny. :)

This happens to both genders & IMO no one should take it personally. Attraction is attraction, I don't mind a few xtra lbs or a "skinny" person, as long as it is not EXTREME.

Let's face it, dating is all about CHEMISTRY, INITIALLY, so if you cannot bring your "A-game"...
 forumfella
Joined: 10/18/2013
Msg: 48
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 10/24/2013 9:44:53 AM
"IMO no one should take it personally!"
I agree, and I didn't. The first 3 criteria I look for in a profile before contact is attractive, location and no children under 12 years of age, after that sharing the same interests is just a bonus. After reading thread upon thread of how well written profiles matter more than pictures, it just struck me as funny.
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 49
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 10/25/2013 7:24:57 PM

I get grossed out seeing the same dudes message me the same dumb messages every time I delete and open a new profile. They are still here, for years, with the same loser messages.


Yet you keep reinventing yourself and you've been here for years, too...... Pot-Kettle?


People value something they had to pay for than something they got for free.


So the $5,000.00 a night Escort is Valued more than the Date you spent little or nothing on, but hit it off, as if you're Soul-mates?
 pageforyou
Joined: 7/1/2011
Msg: 50
Not making a good first impression?
Posted: 10/27/2013 9:43:05 AM
There are $5,000 a night escorts? Never heard of such a high price. But, then ... never hired one at any price. :P

I have contacted the same guy who left a poor impression the first time around, changed his profile and improved his appearance. But, I knew it was him and said so.
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