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 TuMuchFun
Joined: 9/29/2008
Msg: 351
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Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating Page 15 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
Eric,
My online dating email advice is as follows (when I was emailing chicks for dates that is.)

Send an email and immediately delete it...kind of like Ron Popeil, send it and forget (well delete) it. That way the only way you know if they read it was if you had a reply. Gets rid of all the feelings of seeing any deleted status on your precious words...it's rather refreshing and far less frustrating.


OK I have had one peeve...

Transvestites/mixed gender, god love you all but state it in the first sentence, not the last sentence of your profile. Just can't think what happens to the ones that don't read a profile...sex on the first date could be interesting.
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 352
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 1/29/2014 8:56:43 AM

Posted by TuMuchFun:
"Send an email and immediately delete it...kind of like Ron Popeil, send it and forget (well delete) it."

Absolutely. I have been a proponent of that technique and employ it whenever I am in dating mode. Concur 100%.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 353
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Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 1/29/2014 8:56:48 AM
I have noticed this one predominately in the younger crowd...multiple collage style pictures. Too much going on.

What's with the pictures of people in the driver's seat? I don't get it.

This one pertains to my area (Washington State)...All of the women who have pictures of the themselves in Seahawks shirts/jerseys. It's nice, but in my opinion, most of them are bandwagon fans. Dramatic increase in these types of pictures in the last month.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 354
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 1/29/2014 1:04:15 PM

Transvestites/mixed gender, god love you all but state it in the first sentence, not the last sentence of your profile. Just can't think what happens to the ones that don't read a profile...sex on the first date could be interesting.


This is too funny. And I agree. There was this one super hot lady in another side and I quickly read her profile and I found something interesting to comment on. So I sent her an email. NO problem. Well, she responds to my email and it's all good and dandy, until I go back to her profile to find other stuff that we may talk about. Then I noticed buried at the bottom that she was transgender. Ouch. No offense to him/her, but I prefer real women.
 BelleAtlantic
Joined: 11/7/2012
Msg: 355
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 1/29/2014 1:28:16 PM
^^^

Did you see that episode of Catfish: Kenyonnah & Bow Wow.

Recap: A young lady (who happened to be lesbian) impersonating Bow Wow to meet this other young lady (who is not lesbian or bi). Upon meeting, she insisted that she is just as good as a man (sexually as well) and all that, even sent her 10K prior to meeting and all that.

I get that some people really believe they are a specif gender when the outside looks different from it, but even they know there is a disconnect on how others regard such issues. For such, full disclosure is necessary.

new pet peeve: when I see women pop up on the ribbon of pictures in the app. I'm almost compelled to click just to let them know they clicked on the wrong gender when making their profile, but I realize it may have been on purpose, lol.
 slowitalldown
Joined: 1/25/2013
Msg: 356
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 1/29/2014 6:13:22 PM
There are many reasons a woman might look at another woman's profile. Perhaps to check out the person behind a forum post, or to see how other women are writing their profiles, etc. Im sure there are other reasons, just cannot think of any right now!
 SuzieQForForums
Joined: 8/5/2013
Msg: 357
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 1/29/2014 6:14:12 PM
Oh, yes, I know about that site. Off there now. Then a couple of weekends ago, I got sucked into a free weekend on a "harmonious" site. Was mid communicating when my 3 day free weekend was up. Sooo, being temporarily stupid, I paid for 6 months. Finished the communicating with one guy, we met, it went ok, but I don't think I'll ever hear from him again. Then after I paid, the quality of my matches took a real nose dive. Men too far away, in other states, and in Canada. The profiles were poorly completed, we had nothing in common. One guy mispelled his own name!!! Clearly they weren't doing any of their matching on any level. It just looked like, "let's throw her this guy, he's only 150 miles away, never mind that they have nothing in common." So I called their "cancel me" number, which was of course, difficult to find. The poor young woman was doing her job, trying to get me not to cancel. Hah, nope. I complained about getting guys from Ontario, she said we can tweak the mileage. I said no, if you lower the miles, I'LL GET FEWER MATCHES, and Ontario is really close, so that just won't work. Cancelled, got my refund.
Then, I found another site I was never on before. Free vs paid. Says you can receive emails, just not send. So, ok, I join for free. BUT I CAN'T READ ANY OF MY MESSAGES ??? So I send a message to customer support, Their reply, Yes, you can receive email as a free member. YOU JUST CAN'T READ IT, LOL. Misleading much?

Guess I need to close this Suzie account, and get busy creating a real profile here. SIGH.


On the paid sites one can receive a "wink" from someone, whom it shows as "currently" online.
A person can then respond to him or her with a pleasant note and may never receive a subsequent response.

The reason? Many paid dating websites do not DIFFERENTIATE between free members and paying ones.
Only the paying members can communicate. The lesson here is one should ONLY pay attention to his or her inbox.
 Nj2ut
Joined: 11/5/2012
Msg: 358
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 1/30/2014 1:29:52 PM
This technically isn't a pet peeve but I will add it to the list. I came across a new user who insists on persons sending her a message must have a pic. The grand irony is that she doesn't even gave a pic of her own up, just a image of a woman and a scorpion.
 Seki1949
Joined: 9/4/2013
Msg: 359
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Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 1/30/2014 11:56:50 PM
@ msg 420 (!)


What's with the pictures of people in the driver's seat? I don't get it.


Using the rear view mirror to make a selfie.
 SavoyFaire
Joined: 1/14/2011
Msg: 360
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 2/4/2014 7:22:08 PM
LOL @ 3 chins. That had me bursting out laughing. I totally agree......many people put very athletic activities in their profile and later admit, they have tried neither in over 10 yrs or not at all.
 nyceguy85
Joined: 1/11/2013
Msg: 361
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 2/4/2014 9:40:51 PM
My pet peeve with online dating is the concept of ignoring. A guy sends a girl a message, shes not necessarily interested in him, so instead of saying thanks but no thanks, she ignores him, making herself look like an even bigger egotistical b****. It is a pet peeve because such a thing rarely happens when a guy approaches a woman in a real life scenario. In person, if a woman isnt interested in a guy, she at least communicates her disinterest, whether it be in the form of straight talk, subtle hints, flat out lies or non verbal communication. With online dating, the assumption is always that if a woman does not respond in a timely manner, its not because of technical issues or a busy schedules: its because she doesnt have the maturity to openly communicate how she feels.
 chill78
Joined: 10/13/2013
Msg: 362
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 2/5/2014 7:01:37 AM

There are many reasons a woman might look at another woman's profile. Perhaps to check out the person behind a forum post, or to see how other women are writing their profiles, etc. Im sure there are other reasons, just cannot think of any right now!


I agree. I have looked at men's profiles to see the competition or because I knew some men that had profiles on a dating site. Doesn't mean that I'm gay. LOL.
 activemelaney
Joined: 9/8/2012
Msg: 363
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Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 2/5/2014 9:43:43 AM
^^Chilies...true. Also we women are curious creatures. Always have been.

^^^nyceguy
Your use of words is passive aggressive...exactly why women do not respond to many messages. We have no idea who we are responding to. No desire to have contact with a man who assumes a woman who doesnt respond is an egotistical....
 EricTheBrave
Joined: 12/31/2013
Msg: 364
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 2/5/2014 9:57:48 AM

its because she doesnt have the maturity to openly communicate how she feels.


Guy, you're kinda stretching it here. You approach a woman, unsolicited, and she therefore owes you at least a courtesy? Switch the scenario a bit and put yourself in a bar. The woman tells you to "get lost". This is a fair response. She doesn't owe you even a modicum of explanation why she's sending you back to the corner.

You're gonna need a thicker hide.
 nyceguy85
Joined: 1/11/2013
Msg: 365
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 2/5/2014 9:30:13 PM
@ Activemelaney

My pet peeve revolves around why its acceptable for women to ignore men on here but they wouldnt dare to it in person. I understand reasons why women may ignore men on here, but they dont have that luxury when they are face to face with someone trying to ask them out. Most women in that position will at the very least acknowledge a mans existence instead of co-warding out and run away from him
 abmccray
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 366
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Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 2/6/2014 7:27:25 AM
Nobody has time to answer hundreds of emails, nyceguy.

If you improve your profile enough so that you get a bunch of women you're not attracted to out of the blue, you'll start "ignoring" them as well, for multiple reasons. Half of the time, you just see that you get a message on your phone while out and then legitimately forget to respond at another time, just due to the lack of interest.
 motown_cowgirl
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 367
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 2/6/2014 7:39:25 AM
why its acceptable for women to ignore men on here but they wouldnt dare to it in person.

I'm pretty sure you throw your junk mail away without even bothering to open it, yet if somebody knocks on your door, or calls your phone number, what are the chances of you not responding? people are very reflexive about answering the phone or the door, to the point that it it's almost guaranteed they will do it. (not me, though; I feel just as free to ignore the phone or the doorbell as I do my unwanted emails.) but for most people, most of the time, it doesn't work that way online or with the stuff in their mail box and it never really has.

get over it.

or not.

nobody cares.

least of all, the women who aren't bothering to answer your emails.

but call them cowards if it helps get you through the day. you must find some solace in it, however temporary.
 nyceguy85
Joined: 1/11/2013
Msg: 368
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 2/6/2014 11:13:47 AM

I'm pretty sure you throw your junk mail away without even bothering to open it, yet if somebody knocks on your door, or calls your phone number, what are the chances of you not responding? people are very reflexive about answering the phone or the door, to the point that it it's almost guaranteed they will do it. (not me, though; I feel just as free to ignore the phone or the doorbell as I do my unwanted emails.) but for most people, most of the time, it doesn't work that way online or with the stuff in their mail box and it never really has.


Im glad you feel the need to claim that you know me personally, but allow me to provide a retort. I have caller ID on my phone for a reason. If I dont want to respond to someone I dont know and cant see, I dont have to. Same with someone ringing my door bell. If I am not expecting company or did not order a package, I wont answer the door for any other reason. Not a very good analogy to use when discussing the point I tried to convey. A more appropriate analogy would involve the way I communicate with someone online versus in person. In that situation, I am the same. When I am online, I dont feel empowered to act a certain way because I can hide behind a profile. The way I act on here is how I would act in person, plain and simple. It would be nice for more people to be the same on and off the internet, but the fantasy that social networking sites like this provide is one of the primary reasons shows like Catfish exist.
 sun_and_cinnamon
Joined: 1/19/2015
Msg: 369
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 8/23/2015 7:19:42 PM
"pet" names when I don't even know you.....gag!!! I'm to the point where I have completely lost interest when this happens.
 slothlover_007
Joined: 8/17/2015
Msg: 370
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 8/23/2015 7:36:52 PM
^ This. lol.

Not a fan of pet names either.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 371
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Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 8/23/2015 8:30:34 PM

"pet" names when I don't even know you.....gag!!! I'm to the point where I have completely lost interest when this happens.



Wait, are you saying you don't like anymore when I call you cinnamon and spice? :(
 sun_and_cinnamon
Joined: 1/19/2015
Msg: 372
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 8/23/2015 8:42:51 PM
Just call me hot_under_the _collar
 spot4username
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 373
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 8/24/2015 4:35:47 AM
Long ago I used to have a line in my profile that said something to the effect of:

Cheesy and/or too familiar endearments in a first message will get you blocked.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 374
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 8/24/2015 6:57:30 AM
Here are some of my mine.
Flakes - for example, they send me a text after a date saying they had a great time and want to go out on another date. But don't return my calls / texts when I tried to set up plans
People that are looking for an email / text buddy
Profiles that are too negative
Profiles with only face photos
People that claim to be interested in things that they have ( at best ) modest knowledge about.
 irishgirl772
Joined: 6/3/2013
Msg: 375
Biggest Pet Peeves for online dating
Posted: 8/24/2015 9:50:29 AM
Lying about your real age, marital status, smoking, actual height are a few that come to mind.
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