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 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 86
dating a 10Page 5 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
well, when someone's a 10 on the inside as well as the outside...why are they single? wouldn't someone want to have babies and a family with someone who's an excellent catch? the OP does talk about "dating" not "socializing" :)

Heck, there's a poster here who claims she lives in a small town, gets brutally asked out by every jerk there...and yet still finds other guys worthy for her to date. Out where I live, never met a "goddess" who was alone...but I met some beeotches who were.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 87
dating a 10
Posted: 7/5/2014 11:25:26 AM

when someone's a 10 on the inside as well as the outside...why are they single?

No one's a 10 inside and out, as we all have our flaws. That said, why would anyone who's a 10 inside and out need to date anyone else?
 whippedboi
Joined: 3/12/2013
Msg: 88
dating a 10
Posted: 7/5/2014 11:49:11 AM

Heck, there's a poster here who claims she lives in a small town, gets brutally asked out by every jerk there.


I will bet, without any photos, some women's (and some men;s) opinion of their beauty is mostly in their own minds, vastly inflated

"every guy wants me, it's a curse, I can't walk down a street without them falling like flies to their knees and begging to date me.."

"It's such a curse" --notwithstanding that the majority who say these attention-seeking things have had cosmetic surgery to "enhance" their natural assets and spend hours daily with a'beauty routine' , cosmetics bills over $1000/month
would never dream of stepping out the door without careful makeup sessions, hair and revealing/sexy clothing
 BLoNDeANGeL845
Joined: 6/10/2014
Msg: 89
dating a 10
Posted: 7/5/2014 12:20:27 PM
"It's such a curse" --notwithstanding that the majority who say these attention-seeking things have had cosmetic surgery to "enhance" their natural assets and spend hours daily with a'beauty routine' , cosmetics bills over $1000/month
would never dream of stepping out the door without careful makeup sessions, hair and revealing/sexy clothing

I don't think I've seen one woman in the forums who appears to have had surgery (unless they had a breast enhancement) but the faces of POF IMO appear unaltered (it's a free site, do people who have $30,000 for a nip-N-tuck go on free sites?)

I don't see how any woman could spend hours, unless it was 1 hr at the gym, a shower, & blowing out her hair & 10-15 mins on makeup!

$1,000 a month? Maybe the ENTIRE cast of a DRAG QUEEN SHOW would spend $200-300 but $1,000??? NO phuking way!

Hair? If a woman has it, she should shampoo & style it, or at least shampoo, comb & air dry!

sexy/revealing clothing? Unless a woman is shopping at Aunt Bertha's Geriatric Mart, most women's clothing will be "stylish"...

Trying to make daily hygiene & grooming into a high-priced porno-drag queen get-up does not compute.
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 5/3/2014
Msg: 90
dating a 10
Posted: 7/5/2014 12:36:16 PM
It's funny, yesterday at Convergence, Mirina Sirtis (Deanna Troi) spoke and she was REALLY funny; but she was refreshing

She is almost 60 now and still absolutely drop dead beautiful; and she made a comment that she wished that she had appreciated how pretty she was back when she was young; at the time she was in her peak Twiggy was the norm and she was curvier than usual and just didn't get how pretty she was until now looking back, and then looked at everyone in the audience and said that people try and emulate people in magazines, and newsflash people, those pics are not REAL.

She said for everyone there to appreciate how beautiful they are now; not wait until way in teh future to get that trying to live up to an unrealistic societal norm when in fact, society is celebrated by unattainable, surgical and photoshopped.

It was funny, but it was true. She was STUNNING and I know a ton of guys who were totally into her but she had no idea at the time how beautiful she was, because she was not "conventionally" pretty by the accepted standards of her time. She was always trying to live up to looking like someone else, not getting how stunning she was.

My daughter is GORGEOUS and people would absolutely kill to look like her, and she is angry she doesn't look like me which blows my mind, because she is the personification of what people literally get sick trying to look like; but all she can see is what she does not have that she thinks I do. I want to shake her, because she is so flipping ridiculously pretty and perfect exactly as she is.

Everyone guy and gal, is a 10 in some way, they have SOMETHING in them that is perfection; so own that, be comfortable and don't worry about what anyone else is. It's all subjective anyways; everyone will be a perfect 10 to someone who "gets" them and appreciates them.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 91
notice, its
Posted: 7/5/2014 2:28:45 PM
"No one's a 10 inside and out, as we all have our flaws."

>>>this reminds me of what the nuns used to teach:

"there was only one perfect human, and look how the world treated Him."

Its too bad some (not the person I'm quoting, i never met her) people fear the idea of a 10. I've personally met 10's. they are the people who make you give up your cool attitude, make you lose your laid back style, your "can't be moved by anything" attitude. Then again, I was always the kid who wanted to see things and experience things that impressed him, moved him, stimulated him.

"That said, why would anyone who's a 10 inside and out need to date anyone else? "

>>>Exactly. they don't NEED to date anyone else. the healthiest relationships are when you aren't needy. those are about sharing what you have, not needing.

While I admire the people who claim, "everyone I dated was a 10 to me", I also have to point out...they ain't chopped liver themselves :) When you can attract attractive people, it's realistic to say the person you attracted...is attractive in general.

Its true, everyone has something in them that's perfect. And we usually try to make these people our friends...unless they're hot as well. then we wish they could be more. will they have an imperfection? sure. but as any lover of any subject can tell you, a beautiful version of what they enjoy may be made more so with an imperfection--for example, an old car or furniture or mechanical device with "patina" looks great, a newer car/furniture/mechanical device with the same patina (ie, surface rust, mild wear) looks like hell.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 92
notice, its
Posted: 7/15/2014 2:32:14 PM

Its true, everyone has something in them that's perfect.


I don't believe this one bit. We all have room for improvement. Women that are tens worked hard to look like a 10. It may be makeup, surgery, exercise, nutrition, even the hottest of hot, in the morning may not look that good. Also, these people can improve in their personalities, some needing to be less narcissistic, others be more sure of themselves.

So, I don't believe in perfect, particularly ALL the so called 10s.
 epz33
Joined: 5/20/2014
Msg: 93
notice, its
Posted: 7/15/2014 6:26:40 PM
I would like to date a((( seven))), but (((ten)))Spiritually.


Just saying.
 epz33
Joined: 5/20/2014
Msg: 94
notice, its
Posted: 7/15/2014 6:27:05 PM
I would like to date a((( seven))), but (((ten)))Spiritually.


Just saying.
 Debisue64
Joined: 1/19/2014
Msg: 95
view profile
History
notice, its
Posted: 7/15/2014 7:40:49 PM
lol.. im happy with a 6 ish.. he just has to be confident in his 6ishness..
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 96
dating a 10
Posted: 7/17/2014 6:40:47 AM

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.


You're wrong.




Beauty is in the eyes of the beer holder.



Hehehe
 BLoNDeANGeL845
Joined: 6/10/2014
Msg: 97
dating a 10
Posted: 7/18/2014 4:36:11 AM

Yes! I'm not anyone's "10" either but I've been on dates when the guys made it pretty clear that they just wanted to smash, or gotten leered at in public. I'm glad that I'm more on the "cute" side than 'HOT' because that must be annoying with the constant harassment, sexual advances and attention. Your post reminds me something my good friend told me. He said that he prefers NOT to date the "super beautiful" women because often times, they are the most damaged and insecure.

@msg 34-gosh, ur like a 20, girlfriend!

Unwanted advances must be uncomfortable to either gender!
 ClooneysTutor
Joined: 3/30/2014
Msg: 98
dating a 10
Posted: 7/19/2014 1:57:19 PM
Never experienced an unwanted advance offline.

An unwanted rejection? More common.
 ace41s
Joined: 2/19/2014
Msg: 99
dating a 10
Posted: 7/27/2014 5:37:02 PM
People (at least men) are slightly more nervous about conversing with a "10" because they view them as "high in status", therefore being rejected would be more of a blow to the pride.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 100
all my ex's once had something perfect in them :)
Posted: 7/28/2014 9:42:11 AM
^^^interestingly, there's a theory that someone who only gets about 75% of the room's attention (IE a 7 or an 8) gets hit on more often, b/c they are seen as more approachable, or a better risk.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 101
dating a 10
Posted: 7/31/2014 11:11:06 AM

Once had a relationship with a 9.5 (on the outside) but it turned out that she was a 3 max. on the inside. I try not to throw a whole lot on outside appearances (within reason) anymore.


I don't know, but some of the best women I've gone out with were "damaged" 9.5 women. They were not the "perfect mentality of those that claim and work at being a 10, but rather even when not dressing up are still hot, and are still damaged. I tend to attract this type of women, but I have to admit that I liked this type of women because together we then enjoy all our imperfections and accept all the bruises and wounds of loves past.
 easterparadehat
Joined: 4/14/2014
Msg: 102
dating a 10
Posted: 7/31/2014 9:51:39 PM
What is funny is how guys seem to rate women as 1 to 10. I've never heard a woman I've spoken with that this guy is an "8" or this one is a 3 or 5. They usually tell me he has a great personality and the biggest brown/blue/green eyes I've ever seen. This has to a man thing directed toward women.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 103
view profile
History
dating a 10
Posted: 8/1/2014 8:14:55 AM
“What is funny is how guys seem to rate women as 1 to 10. I've never heard a woman I've spoken with that this guy is an ‘8’ or this one is a 3 or 5. They usually tell me he has a great personality and the biggest brown/blue/green eyes I've ever seen. This has to a man thing directed toward women.”

I don’t know any men who do that in real life (then again, I have very few male friends). I don’t even do that and I’m a professional statistician who rates and ranks things for a living. The only time I think anyone does this is when somebody brings it up on dating website’s message board! That said, I agree with Birdman about “Saying that women want someone for their personality is like men wanting a woman for theirs” – most of my female friends just talk about how “hot” a guy is, just like most men do about women. No numbers – just “Oh my God, that guy is so hot I’m melting inside!”

The only time I usually hear personality come into play is if it’s a BAD personality, like a hot guy who ended up being lame or an ahole. Or if it’s a guy who’s NOT so hot and nobody wants to date him (“HawkingJr has a nice personality, don’t you think?”). The eyes thing, though, that I do hear a lot, along with many other body parts – I’ve even heard it multiple times about my own eyes (frankly, I’ve only met one female in my whole life whose eyes seemed remotely special to me – and her eyes were like beacons from outer space and EVERYBODY noticed it, including females that hated her).

I can’t recall hearing female friends “rank” guys – outside of celebrities, most of my female friends seem to only care about one guy at a time (regardless of whether they are actually dating or in a relationship with that guy) and all other guys could be doormats for all they care (unless they are trying to help out a friend [“oh, you could do so much better than that zero loser!”]). Guys, on the other hand, do seem to do some “ranking” every now and then (“yeah, Kim’s pretty hot but she’s no Pam!”) and maybe a “10” gets slung around in such situations, but nothing like “Lisa’s a 5, Tina’s a 7, Jen’s an 8” like we are doing here.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 104
dating a 10
Posted: 8/1/2014 8:47:06 AM
Every single male that I know rates women. Yet every single female that I know does not use a rating system, other than to rate a guy that is hot, hot.

And women do go for the man's personality as well. Some of my male friends are fat, bawl, not rich, and still are getting to sleep with strippers. They do have that NY abrasive personality.

Men that have balls, usually get the chics as well. Women are attracted to men that are not afraid of asking for what they want.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 105
view profile
History
dating a 10
Posted: 8/1/2014 10:49:08 AM
"Every single male that I know rates women. Yet every single female that I know does not use a rating system, other than to rate a guy that is hot, hot."

Really, you and your male friends sit around going "Kayla's a 4, Jenny's a 9 and Gabby's a 2"? I've never once seen that happen, at any age level. Do some men rate women in their heads? Probably, but none of them have ever publicly stated any numbers to me (other than "she's a perfect 10," which is just a compliment more than an actual well-thought out rating). Again, I have very few male friends and most of the few I do have are in long-established relationships, so my view on the matter is probably skewed. I also tend to hang out with a lot of artistic types who do not display a lot of typical frat boy-type behavior (ironically, most of my female friends are former sorority girls).

"And women do go for the man's personality as well. Some of my male friends are fat, bawl, not rich, and still are getting to sleep with strippers."

Yes, well, anyone with enough money can sleep with strippers. But don't misinterpret my last post: I wasn't saying women don't take personality into consideration when considering whether or not to date a guy, and certainly an ordinary-looking (or in my case, plain unattractive) man can succeed with some women by virtue of their personalities. But then that goes back to my original complaint in this thread: what makes someone a "10"? You're basically saying, a guy can be a 10 to a woman despite negative physical characteristics by virtue of his personality or other non-physical attributes.

But does make him a "10" in general? I would think you are not a "10" unless a significant number of members of the opposite sex are in agreement. Otherwise, as some have suggested, this thread is kinda stupid because many people think their significant others are "10s" even though hardly anyone else on earth would agree with them. I would think the point of the thread is, what is your experience dating someone for whom a substantial number of people think is a "10," and that would certainly exclude ordinary (or ugly) guys for whom only their dates think are "10s" due to impressive personality or other non-physical traits. Is a supermodel-type with a really bad personality a "10"? If you're talking about a woman, she probably still is to most men (I'd still date her!); if you're talking about a man, my guess would be the majority of women would think he was a zero (after getting to know him). Which I suppose supports whoever's theory it was that an unattractive man is in better dating shape than an unattractive woman (although the unattractive woman is in better shape to get free sex than the unattractive man).
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 106
dating a 10
Posted: 8/1/2014 2:30:07 PM

Yes, well, anyone with enough money can sleep with strippers.


Not really. When strippers discover your wallet, they use it as a wallet, so they don't sleep with you, they tease you.
The men that sleep with strippers do not pay them.

What makes a 10 a 10? That is as you said, relative. I have particular taste. For one, I like skinny women. Yeah, call me shallow and an SOB. I get away with it. But for instance the girls in a playboy magazine are not my type at all. To me, they would be considered 7 and 8s, not 10s.

And while I do not consider my own girlfriend a 10 (thank god), she is still, very skinny, has a great looking ass, is very tall, blond and a very attractive face with deep blue eyes. If she bothered to wear make up she could look like a ten. But because she is more of a geek, nature type that loves the outdoors, she doesn't.

I do believe that the criteria for men and women are totally different. What is relevant to a man, is not necessarily relevant to a woman, and vice-versa.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 107
dating a 10
Posted: 8/2/2014 8:11:36 AM

“What is funny is how guys seem to rate women as 1 to 10. I've never heard a woman I've spoken with that this guy is an ‘8’ or this one is a 3 or 5. They usually tell me he has a great personality and the biggest brown/blue/green eyes I've ever seen. This has to a man thing directed toward women.”


My friends and I will rate women. But we don't necessarily give them numbers. We might say "Amy is attractive" or "Beth is okay looking" or "Cathy is better looking than Debbie" etc.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 108
dating a 10
Posted: 8/2/2014 9:12:54 AM
generally, women will discuss how a situation makes them feel, men will discuss how the situation is.

hence, yes, men will rate to state a fact, women will talk about how hot a guy makes them feel.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 109
dating a 10
Posted: 8/4/2014 8:05:37 AM

I have been hit on by what I consider 10's in the past, truth be told? It's very intimidating, you don't ever expect stuff like that to happen to you, and when it does you're not ready for it, well, I wasn't anyway.


There's an easy solution to this problem. Become the friend of these women. Learn to act casual and normal around them. Learn to tease them and tread them like you don't give a fvck. The moment your fear and intimidation goes away, they will want your a ss even more.
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