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 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 42
or just a grey area?Page 4 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
creepy behavior existed before the Internet made it easier. I'm not sure the word is "normal", so much as, "accepted". Certainly, society has "prefered" the younger look since the Kennedys took office. If the photos were semi-nude or bikini shots and the women obviously child-like, that would be an obvious red flag. If its just "duck face" close ups....the case could get argued either way. In the old days, older nobility taking younger wives was acceptable, heck, no one thought Princess Diana's wedding to an older Prince Charles was creepy, most thought it was highly romantic and watched it on TV.

Were I in the OP's shoes, yes, I would use it as a reason to look closer, see if there's any other examples where he crosses that line. It may be a sign of "something", or it may be just that he never got to date at that age, and the Internet allows him to pretend in his head, or....who knows. If the OP is creeped out by this one thing, she's welcome to her feelings and welcome to act upon them. There are, apparently, other women who wouldn't be so quick to dump him. Everyone is looking for different things in a relationship, let him go to someone who accepts him.
 Bebedeleau
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 43
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Creepy behavior or normal in a world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 8:06:54 AM

My daughter shows me the "pervy old creepers" (her words) that try to follow her and her friends.


Yep, my daughter calls them "creepers" too. She hasn't mentioned any on instigram, but she'll say to me that "some creeper" was looking at her. Thank goodness she picks that up.

For all the older guys that think some teen girl is desirable, just try asking her if they think YOU are and watch the look of revulsion on their faces or the rounds of laughter you will get. They don't want you like you like to fantasize (eg., porn) that they might. For a relatively normal, healthy girl it's just "EW".

Daddy issues, molested, willing to trade sex for a daddy hugs? Yah, only if you want to be the predator who victimizes them over and over again.





About Tracy Lords (Nora), who appeared in her first porn at age 16 (not 15).


She was raped at the age of ten.[4] At 12, she fled from her abusive, alcoholic father to Lawndale, California, with her mother and three sisters. Her mother's new boyfriend, Roger, was a cocaine dealer who molested her.[5] In 1983, she began attending Redondo Union High School in Redondo Beach, California.

At age 15, Nora dropped out of high school and was living with her mother's ex-boyfriend, Roger. Posing as her stepfather, he helped her respond to classified ads requesting models. Using a false driver's license ID provided by Roger's girlfriend that stated she was 20 rather than 15,[6] she started in the porn industry.

So yeah ...

And Polanski? Nothing but rape:

Roman Polanski's rape victim describes sex attack in graphic detail for the first time
Samantha Geimer's tell-all book, The Girl, offers disturbing insight into assault
Describes feeling 'complete and utter emptiness' as he raped her
Details of how he plied her with champagne and sleeping pills before raping and sodomizing her in Jack Nicholson's jacuzzi

Speaking at an event last week to promote her book, Geimer asked for 'justice' for her rapist and urged that the judge who presided over the case be investigated to show that he acted improperly in seeking a longer prison term for Polanski, now 80, after the film-maker had served just 42 days in a state jail.






 RedrockJen
Joined: 3/27/2014
Msg: 44
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 8:54:13 AM
Looking at the images is one thing. We are inundated with images of beautiful young people everywhere we go. The problem is when he liked the images and started following these minors. That was crossing the line, imo. Because it is setting up a type of relationship. Connecting and interacting with a child in an inappropriate manner. Grown men should have no such type of interactions with 14 year old girls. Just as grown women should not be setting up cyber connections/relationships with young boys. What is next? Chatting? Emailing? Meeting? Look, but don't like.

As to the OP, I would NOT date a man that spends his free time scrolling through Instagram pics and liking them. I prefer men with more intellectual pursuits.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 45
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 9:17:58 AM
I am not familiar with Instagram-so would he have to be doing a search-similar to googling-to find these girls? How did he find these girls, and did he specify an age range? And if he knows the OP can check to see what he's looking at, why would he take that chance to begin with?
 oceanstorms
Joined: 4/10/2014
Msg: 46
Creepy behavior or normal in a world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 9:43:51 AM
Just because in olden times child brides were part of our social fabric does not mean it would be/is acceptable in today’s world. My youngest daughter, I have three, recently turned 14. She is my height, 5’8”, with curves in all the right places and is a very beautiful GIRL. When I am out with her I want to hang a sign on her back that reads, “I’m 14 years old!” She is constantly ogled by men of all ages…which is in itself bad enough but lucky for me she does not have Instagram. I’m sure if the parents of those young girls on this fellow’s Instagram knew they were being followed by a mature man in his 30’s they would have something to say about it.
It’s certainly inappropriate weird behavior. But as others have alluded to it would seem as if the lines of acceptable/unacceptable behavior have been blurred. For example, a good friend of mine (she’s my age) recently answered her husband’s (of 21 years) phone to find he was “sexting” a female “friend” …with pictures and everything. She was devastated. His explanation? I’m not cheating because we are “only sexting” and he fully expected her to believe him. Crossed a line? I would SAY SO! But in his mind…no line was crossed!
What we appear to have now is a society where in the past religion set the behavioral boundaries. When I was growing up most people were members of some kind of faith based community where the boundaries of acceptable/unacceptable behavior were written in black and white. I think these days these people are a minority. So what takes the place of behavioral boundaries when religion is no longer there? Absolutely Nothing. It is left up to each individual to decide for themselves what is and what is not appropriate…if they even think about it at all. Consequently we see more and more diverse interpretations of old societal norms.
Last year in the community I was living in there was a huge RCMP (Canadian police) investigation into child pornography. The culprits? Teenage boys getting their underage girlfriends to text nude pictures of themselves to them. These pictures were then all shared amongst the boys. In Canada it IS against the law for underage children to post/view what the police called, “child pornography” and there were actual charges laid against some of the teenagers.
Just because the fellow the OP was posting about is open about his behavior does not mean it’s acceptable. It’s up to each of us to decide what behaviors are acceptable to US. If I decide it’s not acceptable end of story. Move on and consider it a lesson learned.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 47
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Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 9:46:48 AM
I'm totally disgusted by any man looking at any female who is young enough to be his daughter with lust.


I've been to the strip club and they're 18 and older. What's the big deal?
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 48
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Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 10:44:19 AM

I've been to the strip club and they're 18 and older. What's the big deal?


We only have one strip club in town so you can literally get into a cab and say: "Take me to planet big titties!" and he or she will drive you there. The club is called Centerfolds though.
 BLoNDeANGeL845
Joined: 6/10/2014
Msg: 49
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 11:01:08 AM
Roman Polanski got suckered by a mother-daughter tag team. I saw them on TV recently, interviewed, smirking & laughing. They went from being a broke welfare family to being wealthy landowners/homeowners in Hawaii on Roman's dime...The Mom pimped her daughter out & he was not the 1st...

Tracy was smart as a whip & nobody's fool.

These little girls playing grown-up- where are their Mom's? Who gives them the $$$, clothing, the makeup, the acoutrements, the phones, etc.?

Does Mommy think no one is gonna look? IMO many Mommies are pimps too!

The man in OP's story sounds like a dolt, but to paint him as a pedophile???

I would love to follow his account
since op did not tell us what SOME vs MANY means...
did he click like on 2 under 18 girls? & like on 107 18+ women?
or did he like 107 14 year olds + 3 18+ Russian women?

OMG what a sicko, a YOUNG man who likes looking at pretty young women...

I would never date anyone like him either...you know why? Cuz a young guy like that wouldn't WANT an old bag like me!
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 51
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Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 11:22:46 AM
OP, you know what to do.

I remember you from when you had your pictures up. You're a very pretty woman. Why waste your time on a man who spends all his on OTHER women. Find somebody who is crazy about you. The teenage thing is just an added concern.
 BLoNDeANGeL845
Joined: 6/10/2014
Msg: 52
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 11:56:23 AM
DUMP HIM, BUT don't suggest he is a pedo- TY for the more accurate info...also understand a teen is 13-19...

Me at 19 was not me at 13 & I am sure most women can say the same.

Even at 15-16 some girls are very PRECOCIOUS
And their Mom/parents should monitor them as well as possible...

My 22 yr old niece doesn't look sexy.

I've seen 13-14 year olds look/act 25. I woudn't blame a man 4 looking at them.
 RedrockJen
Joined: 3/27/2014
Msg: 53
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 9:43:02 PM

Well here's the information you want: He recently started following about 60 random women/girls... 17 accounts are from teenagers. But he mainly likes pictures of teenagers. For example yesterday he liked about every picture of one teenager on her account. Some pictures were posted months ago.


This is beyond disturbing.
 jpwrnglrwmn
Joined: 10/21/2013
Msg: 54
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/9/2014 10:39:28 PM
I don't use instagram or any social media (no twitter, facebook, etc),but this just sounds plain creepy. I mean, you guys have been together for 4-5 months,so I'm assuming you are exclusive? Yep, it sounds like he really has nothing better to do than look for random pictures of women. . . and added to that is that these girls are underage. Yech.. You deserve someone much better , one whose focus is on you and not random strangers.
 RedrockJen
Joined: 3/27/2014
Msg: 56
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/10/2014 8:11:50 AM
I'd put your profile back up. Get some great pics. Start fresh. Leave that loser behind. Regardless if they are minors or not, he is a scumbag for openly, conspicuously lusting over the images of a great number of women while in a committed relationship with you. Even if he were not a creep or a borderline pedophile, he's still been disrespectful to you. You deserve better.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 57
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/10/2014 8:38:06 AM

Not provocative, just an innocent looking girl, properly dressed, ... but with a duckface and big sad eyes... going for a fashion, model look or something. She looks around 15 years old.

I'm just answering questions now. For the record I'm done. Will meet him tomorrow. I'll keep you updated.


My question is: If he was liking and tagging pictures of 25-35 year old women on social media, are you OK with that?
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 58
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/10/2014 8:43:17 AM
If that 32 yr old had a 14-15 yr old daughter who's selfie was ogled by a man his age, he wouldn't stand for it yet he'll do himself. Some men just don't get it.
No... it's not normal but it's normal to men like him.

This is the kind of stuff separates the good from the bad
I love the male body and have gone out with younger men but I sure as hell won't ogle under aged boys.
Common sense people... common sense


'And it bothers me. But I'm not really sure what to think about all this..' - As we always say, follow your gut feeling
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 59
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/10/2014 9:08:33 AM

If that 32 yr old had a 14-15 yr old daughter who's selfie was ogled by a man his age, he wouldn't stand for it yet he'll do himself. Some men just don't get it.


I think bringing children into the equation to prove something is always foolish.

Men are very often protective of their daughters no matter who they date even if they are of similar age.

Would most brothers and sisters have sex even if they are a similar age? The taboo against sex with close relatives is one of the strongest in society.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 61
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/10/2014 9:34:32 AM

But making it a daily hobby, and trying to get a random womans attention by following and liking every picture they post... I am not okay with that.


I think it's normal not to like that sort of behavior, and creepy that someone in a relationship likes so many pictures of random women. More creepy that they are immature women. I don't often like pictures of women that appear immature. Even when I know they are over 18, many Asian women up to age 28 look like younger than 18, the look doesn't appeal to me.

One of my bigger problems with this is the following: What does he do when he does get their attention? Because someone will like the attention, so I am sure that someone will have responded by now, so what does he do when they do respond?

I would ask him why he does this, what happens when they do respond to the attention. But no matter his answers, I would likely dump him, but I would be curious as to his response.
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 62
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/10/2014 9:56:13 AM
'I think bringing children into the equation to prove something is always foolish.'

Foolish? Those girls that 32 yr old are "admiring" are someone's daughter. Think about that for a second.


'Would most brothers and sisters have sex even if they are a similar age? The taboo against sex with close relatives is one of the strongest in society.'

How the hell do you bring incest into this picture?! Are you from the south?





I hear banjos playing


*edit..... The word is underaged, not immature. Girls can be mature and grown women can be immature.
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 64
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/10/2014 10:43:22 AM
Tomorrow I'm meeting him and I'm going to ask about his intentions. And set him free.



Sweetie.... I wouldn't even bother asking unless you want to, for kicks, listen to what he will come up with to justify his behaviour. The real funny thing is he will actually believe whatever yarn he spins.
I guarantee it
I know you don't want to come across as a biotch crossing him off, out of your life, but it's important to surround yourself with people you can respect.
Do you respect this guy and what he does?
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 65
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/10/2014 12:21:05 PM

'Would most brothers and sisters have sex even if they are a similar age? The taboo against sex with close relatives is one of the strongest in society.'

How the hell do you bring incest into this picture?! Are you from the south?
I hear banjos playing

*edit..... The word is underaged, not immature. Girls can be mature and grown women can be immature.


I thought about what I posted and was going to edit it, but my Internet had an interruption before I could. I was thinking that using one's own biological children as an example of how someone would feel about other children isn't a good way of showing how one would feel.

So sorry, shouldn't have posted this in the way I did and you are right about the incest part.

But as to underaged Vs immature APPEARANCE, I meant what I posted, and what I said was implied. I was thinking of Asian women on a dating site that listed their ages at 25 and higher but looked like Barbie dolls age maybe 14. The pictures of Asian women over about 28 most often appeal to me as they appear more mature.

Without knowing someone's age, a women that was underage would appeal to be if she appeared to look more like 25+.

I was talking only about appearance.

Young women on a site like POF often look older even when they list their ages at 18-25. For whatever reason, women in the USA age 30-55 look their age, while many USA women past 55 look younger than their posted age.

Western people often say Asians look younger. But past a certain age, they seem to catch up in appearance and start to look older. I don't see many healthy 65 year old Asians in most of Asia outside of Japan.
 Ed Bear
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 66
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Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/11/2014 12:26:07 AM
To PollyGraf, I want to say that looking at (or even collecting) publicly posted non-indecent photos of young women is not illegal in the UK, or anywhere else I know, unless there is evidence of stalking such as contact attempts or harassment. We are NOT talking porn or abuse photos here, as far as three pages of posts tell us.

Many people would be disgusted that someone they don't know or dislike would fantasize about them, but it's not illegal. Anyone is free do decide they don't want to go out with a person who looks at others, but it's not illegal. Anyone is free to decide they don't want to date a whanker, but all they're doing is cutting themselves off from most dateable humans.

Keep in mind that within my lifetime, the average age of first marriage or pregnancy has risen from 17 to 27 in Canada, and even higher elsewhere. Women in their late teens - high-school graduation age - were generally considered at their most marriageable age.

Our society has come around to the idea of more women being allowed to plan their own lives, and a far greater proportion of young people of all genders attend post-secondary education these days. The age of marriage was still 14 until not that long ago here in British Columbia. The cultural hangover is that women are ready to be "married off" as soon after puberty as possible, before they "go past their prime."

There are plenty of old folks and conservatives, not to mention religious believers in life-long marriage, for whom this is STILL both normal and ideal.

On the other extreme, let's note that Japan passed its first law making porn involving youngsters LAST MONTH. And they did it only because of pressure from international law-enforcement agencies. The Japanese have never socially considered pre-pubescents to be sexual beings or shameful, despite their country harbouring plenty of old pervs going to young-looking hookers in school sailor-suit uniforms.

And let's note that they also didn't touch the manga, anime or literature involving young children.
ED BEAR

Glad to see women having more choice than selling themselves off to the first bidder.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 67
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/12/2014 1:42:46 PM
haven't read the entire thread-but my question is...shouldn't somebody 32 yrs old have BETTER things to do with his time?
Cindy O
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 68
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Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/12/2014 2:42:26 PM
Some random bits that I notice have not been mentioned or addressed yet:

* Biggest problem, Op didn't provide enough information to do more than make snap judgments, which lots of people have done. Also no indication that the OP actually ASKED the guy about this, she just spied on him and started jumping.

* The fact that modern electronics and "social media" allow for new variations on all the same old concerns and mistakes that people have or make, doesn't magically cause any of them to be different. What this means, is that the Op's question of whether her worries should not exist, due to her relative lack of understanding of new technologies, is invalid. Crappy behavior is crappy behavior, whether it's done using flashing lights and bright screens or not. As well, however, innocent behavior is also not made suspicious, just because IT is conducted electronically.

* I have a question about the details, since almost none were provided. I have witnessed, and myself become caught up in a few habit-forming behaviors that might look nutty to some. One of the things that this very site at least used to have, was a "rate photos" page. It could get to be an addictive habit to visit it each day, and click yeah or nay on pix of all sorts of people, and half-way think that you are helping other people, or just getting caught up in the game-like sensation of clicking stuff. This could be the equivalent to him of looking at cute cat pictures when he's bored.

Need more detail.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 69
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/12/2014 3:33:01 PM
so, some of the teenage girls he's following, follow him back? I remember someone posting here earlier about asking those girls if they'd think he was creepy and gross. I suppose these girls have spoken.

some people like attention. so much, they don't consider there are different types of attention. of course, if the youngster never gets to meet the attention giver, then one can argue about the harm done. versus what harm was done previously to make someone want attention so much.

the moral of the story:one tool for safety on the Internet, is to learn the different types of attention one can get, and that they aren't all favorable. and its not just children who need to figure this out.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 70
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Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/12/2014 4:52:14 PM
So, is he purposely seeking out photos of attractive teenagers or do they just appear at random and he "likes" them in the spirit of the moment and then forgets about them? When he "likes" them, are they readily accessible where he can repeatedly go back and look at them, and/or can he save them to a file to return to at will? Or do they just get a "like" tally and disappear? (I don't have an Instagram account, no idea how it works in there.)

I suppose there's no harm in him "just looking" and admiring, but if it seems obsessive, or if he's saving hundreds or thousands of photos of attractive teenagers that he doesn't even know in a file to go back and look all the time, I think that's a little weird.

Best case scenario, he's just got the 'kid in a candy store' mentality and is getting a few jollies from looking at all the pretty pictures.
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