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 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 22
Confessions of a Sociopath.Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Keep in mind, that in the course of your life you will face personal adversity & even tragedy (sickness, injury, etc)
It is not if; but rather it is when! It happens to everyone eventually.
Then you'll have to ask whether you prefer someone who is caring for you to have a conscience or not.

I survived 2 major vehicle accidents. One was on a motorbike... where Ambulance, Police and Fire Fighters came to the scene within 2 minutes and help came right away... but I walked away without a scratch. The 2nd time was... I driving through a mountain late at night... and I crashed into a guard rail. My phone had no service... so I decided to sleep in my car till help arrived. I was stranded for 6 hours before I was taken to a telephone in the nearest town. I also walked away without a scratch.

I personally believe I am capable of changing, but whether I can control the inner sociopath... that's a different story. It'll always be lurking around. It depends on my mood... literally, on how I would go about a situation where I'd need to take action.

But yes I appreciate your insight. I am happy with this label, but maybe I could get over it?... And soon want something else? Only time will tell. As I'm only 21 years old and still have a long way to go.


Then you'll have to ask whether you prefer someone who is caring for you to have a conscience or not.

I can honestly say I'm quite thankful for living in a country with so much freedom. I can honestly say if I was put in a 3rd world country... my way of thinking and actions wouldn't be accounted for.
 Double Cabin
Joined: 11/29/2004
Msg: 23
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Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/3/2014 10:19:54 AM
You chose the word "confession," not acknowledgement. That indicates guilt. As someone has already pointed out that just makes you a !@#k.

You're only 21. You have no idea what you are or what you can be. The choice to be an indefinite !@#k is certainly one you're capable of not making.
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 24
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/3/2014 12:22:11 PM
Even though you posted this ostensibly as a Public Service Announcement, it is obvious, by the way you offer up evidence as a counterpoint to other posters, that you are seeking validation for your theory.

That is completely contrary to sociopathic behavior, but narcissists and other attention seekers crave validation.
A sociopath doesn't give a sh!t what anyone else thinks.


I survived 2 major vehicle accidents. One was on a motorbike... but I walked away without a scratch. The 2nd time was... I crashed into a guard rail. ... I also walked away without a scratch.


That would feed a narcissistic personality, since they believe they control the world and outcomes of events. Also, Delusions of Immortality are not uncommon among teenagers. You are barely out of this phase, yourself, if you are being honest about your age.


So you can just imagine how committed I am to prescription pills right?


Get back on the meds. Then print out this thread and show it to your shrink (IF you want to get some help).



But yes I appreciate your insight. I am happy with this label, but maybe I could get over it?... And soon want something else?

Otherwise, just keep jumping around on the internet, filling in checklists until you find a diagnosis you are "happy" with.

Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/3/2014 1:46:59 PM
Oh god...even this conversation has so many holes in it already.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 26
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Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/3/2014 2:13:52 PM
You keep coming up with ideas to make you seem like someone with a sociopath disorder and really all it is, is some basic teenage angst of which many teens & young adults have, because like babies, the world revolves around them. Even if you never grow out of this limited mindset, and many never do, it's still not a case for you being a sociopath. You don't seem to get that the degree past normal one would have to be in to be a sociopath.
 Yule_liquor
Joined: 12/7/2011
Msg: 27
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/3/2014 6:46:45 PM

I survived 2 major vehicle accidents. ........ I also walked away without a scratch.


^ Although you came close, ^ this is not adversity, as the final outcome was a result of just plain dumb luck.
You'll know adversity when it befalls upon you, because it isn't something you can just walk away from without a scratch.


I personally believe I am capable of changing, but whether I can control the inner sociopath... that's a different story.


So in effect, you are NOT capable of changing if you are saying that you unsure about being able to control your "inner sociopath"

And then secondly, you just empowered your "inner sociopath" to have the final say on whether you can make a change or not; kinda like a servant deferring to his Master on whether or not he can have a day "off" once in a while (which will then depend upon the Master's mood, of course).


I am happy with this label,


No, your "inner sociopath" is happy with it; but not the part in you that wishes to get out!
 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 28
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/3/2014 10:36:34 PM
Such good insight. I'm starting to learn who I really am, and dwelling in the past on deep thoughts only continues to make me worse. I know I'm still young and I can admit, maturity is something I'm still working on. I really honestly do appreciate all your insights. Don't ask how I came to my senses and got my wake up call back on reality. But I look at this thread topic now... and I'm wondering what the **** did I just do. O_O
 bluemoon24_7
Joined: 4/18/2014
Msg: 29
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/4/2014 6:29:16 AM
I'm going with 21, going on 12. It's like a kid on a wharf about to jump in and he's yelling "look at me, look at me"

Attention seeking at it's lowest.
 gingerosity
Joined: 12/10/2011
Msg: 30
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History
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/4/2014 7:04:08 AM
If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart? - Alexander Solzhenitsyn

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. - Nelson Mandela

We are rarely proud when we are alone. - Voltaire

It is much more difficult to judge oneself than to judge others. If you succeed in judging yourself rightly, then you are indeed a man of true wisdom. - Antoine de Saint-Exupery.

He who knows much about others may be learned, but he who understands himself is more intelligent. He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still. - Lao Tsu

Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself. - Leo Tolstoy

It is never too late to be what you might have been. - George Eliot

Love not what you are but only what you may become. - Miguel de Cervantes

As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

This above all - to thine own self be true; And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man. - William Shakespeare

The shortest and surest way to live with honour in the world is to be in reality what we appear to be. - Socrates

It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of arts. - Henry David Thoreau

People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. - Maya Angelou

Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but manifestations of strength and resolution. - Kahlil Gibran

We will have been only half educated unless we have acquired survival techniques, a sense of human dignity and worth, an appreciation of life, the ability to give and receive love, the knowledge of how to use our limited time wisely, and the determination to leave the world a better place for having been in it. - Leo Buscaglia

To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 31
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/4/2014 10:47:22 AM
Those quotes................................. so much knowledge and insight just learnt. Much appreciated for your time and effort.




I'm going with 21, going on 12. It's like a kid on a wharf about to jump in and he's yelling "look at me, look at me"

You're pretty spot on. I enjoy what I do, I just need to find the perfect balance in order to gain a perfect result in what I'm trying to achieve.



Why not talk to your psych and see what they can do for you?, just tell them the truth instead of hiding things or only telling them what you think they want to hear.
You're incredibly young and have plenty of time to work things out.

Most definitely.
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 32
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/4/2014 11:42:20 AM
Alex,
If your parents are immigrants and have heavy expectations of their son, perhaps you are running to the refuge of these "diagnoses" to escape the pressure of living up to their ideal.

If you are the only child, things will be even more stressful. They will expect you to provide a comfortable existence in their old age.

You don't have to be declared crazy to come to terms with who you are and what you are capable of.

Don't look for excuses as to why you can't measure up. Their expectations may be unrealistic.

Read up on "Little Emperor Syndrome."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_Emperor_Syndrome


The combination of immense pressure to excel and extreme pampering is reported to have resulted in a stunting of social and emotional growth.


You are an admitted liar and maybe you are lying about your age, here. Regardless, you seem young enough to learn how to build a more fulfilling life for yourself, versus peering into your own bellybutton looking for "answers" to made-up problems.
 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 33
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/4/2014 9:33:59 PM

Alex,
If your parents are immigrants and have heavy expectations of their son, perhaps you are running to the refuge of these "diagnoses" to escape the pressure of living up to their ideal.

They pushed me into University after high school which I never wanted to do. They never helped me with homework... but they don't understand why I didn't get an A+ in my maths exam. Yet I get beat up when I come home with a bad report card. I speak two languages, I was brought up speaking Cantonese... and I continue to speak it with my parents. However, it gives me a slight migraine if I try to think in Cantonese. My parents lives are revolved around money... cause they both had very poor childhoods and I can imagine what China/Hong Kong was like back in the day. My sister however, who is 4 years older than me... is on the other side of the boat. She studied criminology... and now works under Corrections and Parole for the government with a successful career and stays out of trouble. However, my mum loves me to death... being the son and all. I was always spoiled too as a kid... but my sister never got anything equal.
 allthegoodnamesrtaken1
Joined: 1/12/2012
Msg: 34
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/5/2014 8:08:32 AM
Alex_O

Thank you for taking the time to share your private life with us. I appreciate your perspective and have a loved one with the same diagnosis. Some of my deepest, most illuminating conversations have been with this individual.

There isn't a single response in this thread that shows an educated background with Sociopathic individuals. I believe you knew this would be the case. Boredom and initiating a game of cat and mouse is fun. It's a typical behavior and what better place than here. You can stay somewhat anonymous, you knew the type of responses you would likely receive and already knew how to deflect them.

Had the responders in this thread taken the time to educate themselves on this topic before posting, it's likely they would have saved themselves the embarrassment of walking into your own game. One you orchestrated and played quite well.

I'm unsure whether to scold you or high 5 you

:-)

 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 35
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Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/5/2014 10:38:14 AM
OH we are all well aware that he's baiting us, it's pretty transparent stuff. I see you joined in too.
 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 36
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/5/2014 11:06:56 AM

Had the responders in this thread taken the time to educate themselves on this topic before posting, it's likely they would have saved themselves the embarrassment of walking into your own game. One you orchestrated and played quite well.

I'm unsure whether to scold you or high 5 you

It was all unintentional. There is honestly no game... because as you can see, I'm being quite literal. I know now I'm not a sociopath as to what I've learnt. Maybe I liked the idea of being one? Due to possibly being a narcissist? I don't know myself that well... and I've only recently started to learn. I honestly didn't know know what kind of responses I'd be receiving... but I'm helping myself discover as to who I am, and why I'm like this. It seems my life has had more negative outcomes than there was positive... and the corruption has gone into my head and I have trouble remembering what is positive anymore. However I am trying my best to battle this 'psychosis'... and change my personality for the greater good. Realizing I'm a****was the first step to changing to be a better person, and I don't wish to play a victim anymore. As I'm just spreading the 'virus' around and causing more people to worry.


OH we are all well aware that he's baiting us, it's pretty transparent stuff. I see you joined in too.

Baiting you all to help me discover who I am? Sounds beneficial to me. :)
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 37
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/8/2014 5:35:26 PM
alex 0- What I think is that you are is an intelligent young man with maybe a little too much time on his hands.
I read your profile, you ain't foolin' me Alex (with the whole sociopath thing), but nice try.
My daughter is 20 and majoring in graphic design, a tip or two for her would be very welcome.
Welcome to POF, have fun, we'll agree to forget this whole thread ever happened-Deal? ;)
 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 38
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/9/2014 5:56:29 PM


My daughter is 20 and majoring in graphic design, a tip or two for her would be very welcome.

I only just came out of a 7 year psychosis... but sure, I can definitely give a few tips.
Keep practicing is the key. Practice makes perfect. There's reasons why I'm so good with psychology and messing with people... if I survived hell for 7 years and came back kicking ass right? :)
And yes, this whole thread guided me... and pointed me in the right direction.
It's all about YOU and mindset. You can teach yourself to do well in things, if you know how to push yourself.
I survived 7 years of psychosis... which involved a lot of expensive life lessons and consequences during that episode period.
And I can tell you now... I'm writing a book about my life, and maybe one day... I hope it can change the world... and help people understand what psychosis can potentially do. And how it can occur at such a young age. (I developed it at 13-14)

I read your profile, you ain't foolin' me Alex (with the whole sociopath thing)

Believe it or not, I was fooling myself. It was a very sick fantasy I had whilst I was under psychosis. ;)
 Mentisnow
Joined: 6/29/2014
Msg: 39
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/11/2014 1:02:18 AM
Dear Alex, you are a novice. Nice try kid. I must say it was disappointing, I really thought you could be more creative.

Keep working on it though, you just might impress someone with your diatribe.
 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 40
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/13/2014 9:29:26 AM

Dear Alex, you are a novice. Nice try kid. I must say it was disappointing, I really thought you could be more creative.

Keep working on it though, you just might impress someone with your diatribe.

Lol.
 razors_edge55
Joined: 11/25/2013
Msg: 41
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Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/13/2014 12:46:04 PM
YEP ,thats my take , what you profess would never admit, NEVER , can you smell TROLL??????????????????????
 razors_edge55
Joined: 11/25/2013
Msg: 42
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Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/14/2014 12:55:03 PM
not sure what you mean but whats your point ?? russan brides ?? Is that the topic ??how would you even know that (if it was true ) ???? I know a sociopath I can tell you stories ,,what do you know ?? you don"t even have a photo, I don't relpy to people with no photo so fick offff
 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 43
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/15/2014 4:50:24 AM

YEP ,thats my take , what you profess would never admit, NEVER , can you smell TROLL??????????????????????

If it helps you sleep at night, then yes... I was trolling. Only towards you though sir.
^_^
 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 44
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/17/2014 8:38:19 AM

How are you doing now Alex?

Getting there. I discovered that, my moods influence my decisions. And I know my image too well, and what others can see from my image. I like to deceive people for the self enjoyment. But I was able to feel very confident and amazing when everyone looks at me from dressing smart and nice and putting on my best cologne. However I'm having a hard time meeting girls on POF. I'm still so immature in terms of what I say to them, although I can understand that online dating is a very dangerous place. And probably the fact is... they expect someone who hasn't been in a relationship to have no experience at all. I'm just really shy towards women, I can't sense when girls flirt with me. Seriously. I don't flirt. I've been hurt by two girls here myself. ;) But I don't blame them. I see it as life lessons, inexpensive ones and sometimes expensive.
I'm still a bit delusional from believing in opinions and beliefs as facts. I'm a bit fixated on what people close to me will tell me.
But I need to realize that, the people who know best... are the ones who have seen it all. I was in a car crash today, my mate was the driver. I saw him directly crash into a car when trying to merge into a lane that was already occupied by another car, but I trusted his control of the vehicle. But I felt guilty as **** cause I didn't say anything... It didn't feel real until it finally hit. Nobody was hurt, but I feel bad cause it was his pride and joy that got wrecked... and he has no insurance. He woke me up though... when he told me that he knew deep down, the reason why I was stuck on a mountain for a 6 hour car crash... was because he planted the idea in my head. Which was true, but he told me... he felt a lot of guilt by placing that idea in my head. I was very selfish and naive to not care about other people's feelings. I still have trouble recognizing people who are actually genuine from such bad experiences. But I can definitely tell you, if I crashed and died on that mountain... he would forever be feeling guilt and everyone that genuinely cares about me... would be a huge wreck.
 ClooneysTutor
Joined: 3/30/2014
Msg: 45
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/17/2014 12:36:17 PM
That about wraps it up.

I'm gonna grab some skittles and play World of Warcraft now.
 Alex_0_
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 46
Confessions of a Sociopath.
Posted: 9/17/2014 5:20:40 PM

That about wraps it up.

I'm gonna grab some skittles and play World of Warcraft now.

Not even interested. I played WoW for 4 years straight, and I have no interest for Draenor. Let alone video games anymore.
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