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 NDTfan
Joined: 6/5/2012
Msg: 297
Using big words ...Page 13 of 14    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)
I understand what you're saying.

I have an extensive vocabulary and I'm quick to learn or teach (coming back to that in a minute*) if I see someone is genuinely struggling or needs help.

Some people are grateful and realize that it's just the way I am; and others take it personally and get butthurt. Usually the ones getting butt hurt are the sincerely dumb.. the others just haven't been exposed to whatever it is yet. It's ignorance in the purest definition of the word. I'm ignorant when it comes to college football, for example. If someone were to take the time to explain it I'd see it as a learning opportunity and not a sermon.

I was a peer tutor all through school and university. I had a lot of practice with people who learned in different ways. One girl started grade 7 with a 14% average. I spent a lot of weekends with her helping her out and by the time the end of the year rolled around she had passed with a 54%. Not good enough for some, but her dad cried like a baby when he came to thank me. She improved every year and now works as a biologist. When the only industry in town closed down, the government offered college training programs to those affected. Most of the men there were functionally illiterate because they dropped out of school to work on the plant. They didn't feel like I talked down to them, even when I used the big words. They simply asked what the words meant and paid attention. We got 34 men in their 40s and 50s into college; between all the volunteers.

I get that I come across as an egghead sometimes (I've gotten comparisons to Spock, Data, Temperance Brennan, Spencer Reid or Sheldon Cooper,etc. (I know they're not real but some people aren't exposed to real life examples), but I've never acted that way to intentionally make someone else feel bad.

One of the biggest compliments I ever got was from a friend who said. "I love talking to you, I learn something new every time. "

I've never dumbed down what I've said, because I would be really offended if someone did that to me. The only people who have ever thought that I was showing off were people were so dumb that they would rather remain in that state than try to improve
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 298
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Using big words ...
Posted: 10/21/2014 11:03:29 PM
I think we dumb things down all the time, maybe without realizing it. It's an intelligent thing to do. A person that is socially calibrated will do it naturally. It's a lack of socialization and reference experiences that prevent a person from knowing when to "dumb things down" and say things in a way the other person will understand and get the most out of it. If I'm telling a friend about a symphony I went to, I'm going to express my ideas a lot differently than when I'm telling another musician my thoughts. They're not going to get anything out of the conversation if you use jargon instead of ideas they can quickly understand and relate to. I don't know a lot about cars, but my best friend fixes cars as a hobby. When I see him, he doesn't tell me about all the different parts of the car, he says: "The car wasn't turning on, so I fixed it." It's dishonest to say we don't dumb things down because it's something socialized people do constantly.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 299
Using big words ...
Posted: 10/22/2014 12:47:58 PM

I think we dumb things down all the time, maybe without realizing it. It's an intelligent thing to do. A person that is socially calibrated will do it naturally. It's a lack of socialization and reference experiences that prevent a person from knowing when to "dumb things down" and say things in a way the other person will understand and get the most out of it. If I'm telling a friend about a symphony I went to, I'm going to express my ideas a lot differently than when I'm telling another musician my thoughts. They're not going to get anything out of the conversation if you use jargon instead of ideas they can quickly understand and relate to. I don't know a lot about cars, but my best friend fixes cars as a hobby. When I see him, he doesn't tell me about all the different parts of the car, he says: "The car wasn't turning on, so I fixed it." It's dishonest to say we don't dumb things down because it's something socialized people do constantly.


This ^^

Just because you're having a conversation with someone and you're not using all your big words and all the information
you have in your head, doesn't mean you are dumbing down.

It means you are having a conversation with someone. It means sometimes you say things in a different way so they
can understand you and you don't have to explain what you are already explaining.

Seems a simple concept to me.

Now if your intent is to teach someone something, that's something else entirely.
 trinity818
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 300
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Using big words ...
Posted: 10/22/2014 4:04:38 PM

A person that is socially calibrated will do it naturally


This is true. Unfortunately I've encountered a huge number of people who aren't.

Too often my encounters were with gear heads or techies deliberately using jargon that would obviously be unfamiliar to anyone who wasn't in the "business". They weren't concerned with being understood or sharing knowledge. They wanted the appearance of having "special" knowledge that whomever they were conversing with did not.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 301
Using big words ...
Posted: 11/23/2014 5:58:37 PM
I can alter my vocabulary if its evident that I'm making someone uncomfortable. The question here for me is if I want to do that with a mate. Do it for 20 or 30 years? And examining my conscience, I find, for me, the answer is no.

When I taught in China, my first year I taught experienced college English professors; the second, college juniors; and the last, scientists who had Fulbrights. They all pegged on the fear scale because they believed they'd never understand me. Having had a French world history teacher in high school who had a very heavy accent, I understood their fear. And was able to reassure them that in a month, they wouldn't even notice, and they didn't. Only the juniors, some of them, had problems with vocabulary. I had one canary in a coalmine sentinel student. If her eyes didn't light up, I brought it down a level. If still not, down again. Sometimes the class got as many as four or five retries. But if *she* got it, I knew everyone did.

Seems easier to me if the one with difficulty simply asked when a world came up. Worked fine in my marriage (he was Chinese). (No, he was a physicist, and never my student.)
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 302
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Using big words ...
Posted: 11/23/2014 6:36:25 PM
^^^^Sounds a lot like my situation. My ex-husband is German and was living here in the US when we met ... boy did he have a heavy accent. The longer we knew each other, I found myself teaching him English.

After we moved to Germany, it was through him (actually quite inadvertently) that I learned German ... no I "learned" the German because I discovered he was speaking the area dialect with me and that was not "high German" which is what I needed to learn first, then the dialect. The whole town had an even different dialect that most outsiders could not understand and so it was like learning 3 different languages at the same time.

I was expected to use the formal high German when conducting business (at a board meeting) and speaking with the higher-ups of the business he was working. I was expected to use the informal German with customers that were friends ... and his family had lots of friends because they were pretty high-profile in the little town we lived in. Then there were the really close family friends and that's when the dialect and local dialect came in. I was able to understand it, but never really thoroughly learned to speak the "town" dialect ... I was just happy to be able to understand it.

My children grew up speaking and understanding it all ... until we left to move back to the US.

I can alter my vocabulary if its evident that I'm making someone uncomfortable. The question here for me is if I want to do that with a mate. Do it for 20 or 30 years? And examining my conscience, I find, for me, the answer is no.
I'm with "Wooby" on that one ... even if I don't have 20 or 30 years left ... not going to alter my vocabulary and dumb down for someone.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 303
Using big words ...
Posted: 11/24/2014 6:45:53 PM
cotter, lol! After two years, my 14 year old son and I came home for six weeks of home leave. While we were at the Beijing airport, my son was over watching the baggage handlers while I checked our arrival time in Baltimore. He was chatting with them, and they were nearly doubled over in laughter. So as we were going to the plane, I asked him what was making the baggage handlers laugh? Oh, they thought it was funny that a foreigner would speak Tianjin Hua!. Sorta like a Baltimore or Brooklyn dialect would be here. For a kid who knew not one word of Chinese two years before, he was reading and writing at grade level when he left. He also had great (beautiful) handwriting.

Ad for my hubby and I, we pretty much developed a language about half English and half Chinese for home. But more Chinese until we left, and more English after we got here.
 AlienHumanHybrid
Joined: 10/31/2014
Msg: 304
Using big words ...
Posted: 11/26/2014 7:15:14 AM
I like learning big words -but I try not to use them.

Using big words doesn't mean one is more intelligent than someone who does not use big words.
A person can understand the meaning of a big word, but have difficulty defining it/breaking it down into smaller words -which is a useful skill in communicating concepts to those who do not share one's background.
One can also understand the definition of/concept behind a large word, but may never have heard the word.
Someone might very well need a dictionary to talk to another -and one might feel very uncomfortable when English isn't spoken properly -and another might feel that as long as you get the point, the words were effective enough.

If it's that much of an issue, just find someone of a similar background or mindset.
It's a good idea to choose one's words based on the background of the other -especially at work -but, in other situations, it might prove to be too much work.
 ClooneysTutor
Joined: 3/30/2014
Msg: 305
Using big words ...
Posted: 11/26/2014 9:28:22 AM
Amidst the sweet reverberations caused by the melodiously composed musical milieu, descended on the dais, his would-be soul mate for the rest of the journey called ‘life’, attired in snowy-white costumes and her tearful eyes stole a glance of his countenance from behind the veil of modesty and grace.
 bluemoon24_7
Joined: 4/18/2014
Msg: 306
Using big words ...
Posted: 11/26/2014 9:57:39 AM
Clooney - too many big words but somehow....they made warm just reading them. :-)
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 5/3/2014
Msg: 307
Using big words ...
Posted: 11/26/2014 10:00:46 AM
My issue is that I don't know they are big words until I get the confused look. To me they are just plain old words. I don't mind if someone asks me to rephrase though; it means they want to understand and are at least listening. I just change it up then... but when a person CONSTANTLY asks me to rephrase... I can't help but wonder if it is more frustrating for them or for me. Probably them LOL.


Amidst the sweet reverberations caused by the melodiously composed musical milieu, descended on the dais, his would-be soul mate for the rest of the journey called ‘life’, attired in snowy-white costumes and her tearful eyes stole a glance of his countenance from behind the veil of modesty and grace.


Ok... are these things you are borrowing or are you actually writing this stuff? You have an amazing way with words if it is coming from you directly.

That was gorgeously put.
 HFX_RGB
Joined: 7/26/2014
Msg: 308
Using big words ...
Posted: 11/26/2014 10:23:53 AM

Ok... are these things you are borrowing or are you actually writing this stuff? You have an amazing way with words if it is coming from you directly.

That was gorgeously put.



When ever you are wondering if someone words are their own or not, just copy and paste them into a search engine.

Enjoy examples of verbosity in writing
RAJESH CHANDRA PANDEY

3. Amidst the sweet reverberations caused by the melodiously composed musical milieu, descended on the dais, his would-be soul mate for the rest of the journey called ‘life’, attired in snowy-white costumes and her tearful eyes stole a glance of his countenance from behind the veil of modesty and grace.

http://rajeshcpandey.hubpages.com/hub/Try-your-hand-at-verbose-style-of-writing
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 309
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Using big words ...
Posted: 11/27/2014 2:25:32 AM
I've never felt like I was dumbing myself down when I spoke to anyone. It's really not hard to have a conversation like: "Hey, how's it going? Did you check out the concert last night? Was it good?"

That doesn't mean that you can't have an extended vocabulary or an appreciation for literature and languages. You just appreciate things on a different level. For example, one person might read a passage from Shakepeare like: "And so, from hour to hour, we ripe and ripe, And then, from hour to hour, we rot and rot;" and miss the joke because they're not aware that they used to pronounce the "h" in the word "hour". Someone could be listening to a band like Cradle of Filth that uses a lot of Old English vocabulary and miss the meaning of a verse because they're unfamiliar with the words. A person that knows has a better knowledge of history and English will get more out of it, but both people can still enjoy it.
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 3/29/2014
Msg: 310
Using big words ...
Posted: 11/27/2014 9:55:28 AM
I think that referring to COmmunication as "dumbing it down" is the root of the issue for OP.

That's all I have to say about that.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 311
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
Posted: 11/27/2014 1:16:20 PM
screw it...drop the F-bomb a lot. It HAS to be the most versitile word in the english language (you've likely seen the comedy routine about it). EVERYONE understands it when you use it often in a sentence. erases all problems.

sometimes, the secret to great communication is...picking only those who would want to listen :)
 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 312
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Posted: 11/27/2014 2:06:15 PM
Here gie this a wee listen to. Tis the F word explained.
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Xt8_HybhM5Q

Saying that one time in stirling (thats in scotland all you geography starved shermans)
i was visiting a mate with a skelp from canada.
I went to get the beers in and as i sat down scotty said to her
'See that c**t there? He's a good c**t that c**t"

Could have been worse he might have said
"See that c**t there? Hes a c**t that c**t

But hey yous are shermans

Messages this short etc
Scottish insults
Bawbag
Fannybaws
Daftie
Schemie
Ned (non educated delinquent)
Smelly weegie (from glasgow)
Mutton molestor (aberdeen)
Pot noodle (dundonian)
 bluemoon24_7
Joined: 4/18/2014
Msg: 313
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
Posted: 11/27/2014 3:05:02 PM
Vlad, I've been to Wales, England, parts of France, Mexico, all of Canada and half the U.S. and ...fvck is universal. And it only has four letters so its not a big word...unless you add another appropriate word on the end. It is a good word. Now the c-word...it has its place.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 314
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
Posted: 11/27/2014 3:23:02 PM
HFX--too funny! I could have sworn I saw Bulwer-Lytton somewhere recently!

A gift: http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-6-most-terrifying-examples-rule-34_p2/

***
My Chinese students wanted to know about the uses/meanings/etc. of the word "fawk"--I told them it was an intensifier.

They also wanted to know about "sh|t" --couldn't understand why it was a swearword at all: Why not yell "EAT" when you're angry? Told them that a culture's swearwords tell you every thing you need to know about a culture. Chinese biggest swearword is Tamada. (his mother's)(stinking c**t-- which is hardly ever said, but always implied.)
 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 315
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Posted: 11/27/2014 3:27:17 PM
Now moony you read wrong when you thought i insulted you. It was meant for HFB_TWT because i always insult him if i can.
But you are correct regarding berkeley hunt. Did you know calling someone a berk down sahf means berkeley hunt?
But we scots say it with venom.

Our city footballing rivals the merricks are berkeley hunts.
As are the plastic paddys in the weege. Berkely hunts.
The huns in the weege? Berkeley hunts.
Liberal types? Some berkely (how ironic after the uni lol) hunts.
Politicians? Berks with added hate.

English is a great language. Why do scots and shermans abuse it?

Probably cause we can.

Did you know edinburgh is the home of penicillin?
So you crazy yanks next time at the clap clinic or gonnareaha gulch
its us brilliant scots who made yous viable on pof again.

True
Hope to die
(Or sober up)

Vlad (penicillin free) Dracul
 Countryheart1967
Joined: 5/19/2014
Msg: 316
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Posted: 11/29/2014 11:04:25 PM
How many "big words" can can one possibly use in an ordinary conversation? O_o
 usernonymous
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 317
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
Posted: 11/30/2014 5:58:28 AM
^ true. Also curious to know what some of these "big words" are just to see if I would pass the test myself.
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 5/3/2014
Msg: 318
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
Posted: 11/30/2014 11:18:55 AM

^ true. Also curious to know what some of these "big words" are just to see if I would pass the test myself.


well, my most recent hand slap was the word ostentatious. I honestly did not know that was a big word. Isn't it common? To be honest it was hard to not replace it with other words that were also considered big (pretentious? showboaty maybe?) What IS a normal word for ostentatious anyways? I suppose I could walk around with a thesaurus but who wants to do that?


To be honest, when I speak I don't choose every word; I just talk, and when you have to constantly paraphrase in your head before speaking and find a half dozen synonyms every other sentence... it can be a little frustrating. I guess that's the curse of reading a lot; you grow up with a ton of words that are as familiar as your own breathing; that you think nothing of whatsoever, that are latin to a few other people.

Ah well...
 Cognoscenti214
Joined: 9/10/2014
Msg: 319
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
Posted: 11/30/2014 12:57:38 PM
I'd be delighted just to have people use words correctly, whether big or small. If I hear one more person tell me "it doesn't matter now as the point is mute..." - I'm gonna frickin lose it. :(
 bluemoon24_7
Joined: 4/18/2014
Msg: 320
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
Posted: 11/30/2014 1:30:41 PM
^^^^ I feel the same way. The same applies to conversations with the younger folks that say the word "like". Every second or third word is "like". Another favorite is using "regards" instead of "regard" or my other favorite "irregardless".

Are we word or grammar snobs? I don't know. I just know that at times its akin to fingernails on a chalkboard. I should drink more wine and relax. :)
 Eternityboresme
Joined: 8/20/2014
Msg: 321
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
Posted: 12/1/2014 3:39:24 PM

How many "big words" can can one possibly use in an ordinary conversation? O_o


Indeed.
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