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 DietFree
Joined: 11/1/2012
Msg: 135
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Has anyone had success on here?Page 6 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
I'd like to respond by kicking your vagina, but I'm afraid I'd lose my shoe! ; )

Wow...the guy who can't afford a coffee date doesn't even have a pair of shoes that fit him...
I had success....and it didn't even cost me a shoe.
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 136
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/13/2014 8:12:36 PM

I don't attract anyone at all......... So what does that make me? A desert with no water at all?


Sigungq, I can't believe no woman has ever given you a chance. Your approach seems normal enough to me, and you're not a bad-looking guy. Do you possess a high-pitched campy-sounding voice, or something else we're not seeing?
 forumfellathesequel
Joined: 7/28/2014
Msg: 137
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/13/2014 8:24:26 PM
I wish one of you ladies would take one for the forum team and date him once, it would stop the endless " I've never ever ever ever never ever had a date in my life "posts... And plus we would know what exactly it is that repels women from him.

So draw straws or something :D
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 138
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Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/13/2014 9:02:53 PM


I wish one of you ladies would take one for the forum team and date him once, it would stop the endless " I've never ever ever ever never ever had a date in my life "posts... And plus we would know what exactly it is that repels women from him.

So draw straws or something :D


Maybe we could all pitch in, and "hire" him a date.
 ClooneysTutor
Joined: 3/30/2014
Msg: 139
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/13/2014 9:14:17 PM
^^^
Or cut to the chase and send him a doll:)
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 140
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Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/15/2014 8:45:17 PM
Now to be fair, some areas in this country can be considered slim pickings. In particular, my state ranks in the bottom fifth, in overweight women. I didn't have to read a statistic article to know that. I could see that just going out to any local public place, and see that. Knowing that it wasn't just my imagination. doesn't make it any better. Oh sure, I could relocate. That isn't possible because I own my business. Re-locating isn't an option. I just decided to put up with it all, cut bait, and pursue other interests.
 hemicharger4403
Joined: 4/8/2014
Msg: 141
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 2:11:06 AM
Hmmm..... well I can assure you that I am 38. Without putting a picture of my DL or birth certificate on here, I guess there is no way to "prove" it but why would I lie?? It's not like someone isn't going to find out once they meet me anyhow. And it's not just the 25 year olds not contacting me, I've had no better luck with 40 year olds I've messaged. As for the age range trending younger, I'm not going to lie; I do prefer(and I say prefer not require) someone my age or younger. I've never been married, have no children, etc. and would prefer someone else who is in a similar situation in life. Additionally, I would like to have a family of my own someday so this is why I have the age range that I do. Not saying those things aren't possible with someone older than 40, but chances are much smaller. Anyhow, the appearing "way older than 38" is the first time I've actually heard someone say something like this so I appreciate the feedback.
 nhtds231
Joined: 11/26/2014
Msg: 142
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 5:18:51 AM
I don't understand all the negative comments from the men on POF. There is nothing special about me or my geographic region and yet I have dated many women from this site. No one should have a problem with meeting one or two new women per week. With that said, I did have difficulty finding someone that I was attracted to and who was seeking a relationship. I originally joined the site because I was tired of party girls, the club scene and drunken weekend sex. I thought POF would be a great way to find that special LTR. I was wrong about that one, mainly found the same type of women I was meeting on the weekend. Just a lot more of them with the addition of many in their late 40's. So if success is measured in dates, meeting new people, going out having fun and enjoying life, yes I have been successful. If it is measured in finding a potential soulmate, LTR that would lead to marriage, then no. But until that person comes along nothing wrong with having fun. To the guy from Wilmington NC, everything you said about your city is wrong. The club scene is active and fun. Who cares if the men outnumber the women, that is every club. I have met a few women from your area on POF. I no longer do the online dating thing, found it can become addictive, confusing and leads to serial dating and sport f***king. Which is counter productive to the reason I joined.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 143
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 6:13:55 AM
I don't understand all the negative comments from the men on POF. There is nothing special about me or my geographic region and yet I have dated many women from this site. No one should have a problem with meeting one or two new women per week.


There are exceptions. But it can be tough to consistently have dates with 2 different women a week when a man gets relatively few responses on POF. When a man gets responses, some women will agree to a date and do the disappearing act when a man tries to finalize plans. I had more success on Match in terms of getting dates. But that came in stretches. I could not have any dates for a month. Then have dates with 3-4 different women within 2 weeks. BTW I realize some men can be flakes as well.
 Ainen
Joined: 6/27/2013
Msg: 144
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 7:07:45 AM

...yet I have dated many women from this site. No one should have a problem with meeting one or two new women per week.


The above is completely illogical. "I had success, therefore everybody should be able to".

I've heard people with jobs say similar things about people who don't have jobs. At my last job, they hired a terrible (IMO) candidate who said he'd also gotten a job offer from another employer. He said anyone can get a job because he got the two offers, that anyone who didn't have a job didn't want to work. I told him he sounded like Rush Limbaugh. Millions of qualified people apply to every job ad for which they qualify and cannot get hired, and are usually not even contacted for an interview.

There are countless reasons someone might not meet one or two new people from here every week. An individual might not be into the bar scene. Someone in his area might not go to clubs. A non smoker might not find many matches in an area where many people smoke.
 mike11091
Joined: 8/25/2013
Msg: 145
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 9:03:57 AM

With that said, I did have difficulty finding someone that I was attracted to and who was seeking a relationship. I originally joined the site because I was tired of party girls, the club scene and drunken weekend sex. I thought POF would be a great way to find that special LTR. I was wrong about that one, mainly found the same type of women I was meeting on the weekend.


I came here with similar reasoning. My instinct for finding women that only wanted something physical from me was ridiculous. I wanted more, but realized that my lifestyle is too independent.

As to meeting one or two new people every week, there's too many factors involved to count that as accurate. Maybe on a monthly basis...


I've heard people with jobs say similar things about people who don't have jobs.


The reason people say that is because, generally, people that complain about not being able to find work aren't going out to find it. Jobs are out there. I can count 12 factories in my area, off the top of my head, that are always looking for people. No, they're not the most glamorous jobs in the world, but they pay greater than $10 bucks an hour and normally have decent benefits. Not to mention, they will literally hire anyone. What people normally mean when they say "I can't find a job" is that "I can't find a job that I like."

That's also not counting the temp services or the agencies that hire workers on a daily basis.

Also, forgive me for sounding indignant, but if one is truly desperate, I hear standing in front of a local Home Depot is something immigrants do to find work.
 AwesomeKisser
Joined: 11/1/2010
Msg: 146
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Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 9:19:21 AM
It depends on your definition of success. I have had plenty of meets and dates. Made a few friends. Had a few relationships lasting anywhere from 3 to 8 months. But still looking for the "one" if you want to call it that. So I suppose I have had success in many ways.

Invariably I find that the people complaining about a lack of success are doing something wrong. Most have bad pictures. And likely a boring or generic write up.

I've said it a million times now. Online dating is not like the real world. It is a sales and marketing exercise. It is catalog shopping. It is two dimensional. All that anyone has to go by here are some pictures and some written words. And they have hundreds of advertisements to look at and choose from.

Now the first thing we see are pictures. Almost everyone will make an initial judgement based on the pictures. If the person looks attractive or appealing in their picture then you are more likely to read what they've written. If the write up is boring or generic then you might not be particularly motivated to contact that person or reply to a message. You need to have an interesting and well written profile that intrigues and interests someone and makes them want to find out more about you. It's as simple as that.

@sigugq: Your pictures are ok but you should try to have a better main profile pic. I recommend (for anyone) to have a professional do a headshot for you. Something that shows you at your very best with good composition, lighting and angle etc. Your write up is fairly good but perhaps you come across as too high energy and maybe that may put women off or make them feel they can't keep up with you or that you may not wish to give them your full attention.

@hemicharger4403: You do look older in your pictures. And there is a proliferation of dishonesty about age on POF. The last two women I met were at least 10 years older than their listed age on their profiles. Also, your write up is fairly generic and makes several common mistakes. And your last paragraph comes across as initially quite negative.

@ Ainen: Your pictures are bad and there are too many with your dogs. And then they are the first thing you mention. You come across as a loner with no friends who spends all his time with his dogs. Your first date suggestion involves your dogs. Not good. You want it to be about the person you are meeting. I don't see anything you've written that would intrigue a lady.

That's just a couple examples. Sorry if it comes across as picking on you guys. take it as constructive feedback.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 147
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 10:47:47 AM

that intrigues and interests someone and makes them want to find out more about you. It's as simple as that.


In my a ss ho le way of expressing myself this is what I call, "differentiate or die." Which was originally said by Dole Burmback back in the days of Mad Men and advertising was king. So yeah. If you understand the medium, you realize that it's not about being great looking, it's about looking interesting. You want a woman to say, "Wow, I want to spend time with that guy. I bet he's a lot of fun." Instead of her thinking "yakes, he is so angry, I am not going there not even with a ten foot pole."

So, awesome dude, well said.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 148
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Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 6:19:36 PM

halcyon_skies wrote:

Sigungq, I can't believe no woman has ever given you a chance. Your approach seems normal enough to me, and you're not a bad-looking guy. Do you possess a high-pitched campy-sounding voice, or something else we're not seeing?


Well, I thank-you for the vote of confidence. Actually, my voice has a 5 octave range. I discovered that while doing Karaoke. So I suppose I could make it sound high pitched and campy, as well I can sing deep bass with the best of them. But I think my normal speaking voice is somewhere in the baritone area. Don't know. Either way, I've spent a lifetime trying to figure out what keeps the ladies away, other than that all of them seem to already have boyfriends.

As an aside, my high school graduating class had 181 students: 64 girls and 117 boys. The math was terrible for a prom date. Engineering school was even worse. It just seems that wherever I find myself, it's absolutely crawling with men, and women are a scarcity at best.
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 3/29/2014
Msg: 149
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 6:51:40 PM
Don't take it personally - both of my professions are highly male dominated (I'm often the only woman in meetings), most of my hobbies and hangouts are male dominated (I'm often one of only a few women) and I can't get a date IRL to save my life.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 150
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 7:20:51 PM

As an aside, my high school graduating class had 181 students: 64 girls and 117 boys. The math was terrible for a prom date. Engineering school was even worse. It just seems that wherever I find myself, it's absolutely crawling with men, and women are a scarcity at best.


Dude, you need to learn to be the aggressor, the hunter, the killer. I have been in exactly the same type of situations as you. Not only that with men that were better looking, better dressed, better dancers, had better watches. Still, I always dated the fashion model, the dark rocker type of chic, the punk intense girl. In your case, what you may need is not what is in the room, don't do the "hello baby.." type of approach, but maybe a Woody Allen type of approach. Even embrace being a little neurotic and shy. Just remember, ask a lot of questions so they do the talking. Then tell them a little about you. Make fun of them. In a fun way, so you are not laughing at them, but laughing with them.

Dude, you got the tools. YOu are a great dancer, you are fit, you're not ugly, you're a fvcking engineer (meaning you make money and make decisions). You are a catch.
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 151
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 7:28:27 PM
Come on IG.... If Sig was a Hunter, His Indian Name would be Vegetarian........
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 152
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 7:50:23 PM

Come on IG.... If Sig was a Hunter, His Indian Name would be Vegetarian........


If I could get our friend Sig laid, I would personally fly up to where he is and buy him a beer. Not that he cared, but I would.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 153
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 7:54:38 PM
Vegetarian-Indian word for "lousy hunter".

Sig, seriously, some people just are not good at connecting with the opposite sex...doesn't mean they are bad persons, or that they are unknowingly gay, or any such thing...

Have you considered working with a life coach or an actual matchmaking service? You seem like a really good person, but somehow or other you keep getting in your own way.

I don't think this is something that a friend, relative or "self-help" book can assist you with.
Cindy O
 Looking_For_Love_Too
Joined: 2/17/2014
Msg: 154
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 8:21:38 PM
The business of dating is a challenge - in more ways than one. It is easier said than done for many a reason.
I'm sure that some have had success with online dating - check out the "success stories". But why it works for some and not for others... if one had the answer to that question, one could be as rich as Markus!
 winetaster_2304
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 155
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Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 8:51:47 PM
So far I have had no success.
 winetaster_2304
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 156
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Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/16/2014 8:54:52 PM
Men don't like me, or I guess don't want to try to get to know me because I'm no a skinny blonde.
 Ainen
Joined: 6/27/2013
Msg: 157
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/17/2014 6:23:21 AM
Many women say they want a tall man, but if he's 32' 9" tall, maybe some consider that too tall? Gulliver's Travels.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 158
Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/17/2014 7:17:46 AM
sigungq
There are oodles of attractive and funny women posting on the forums. Saying they are date less. You might consider msging a few!
What do you have to lose?
A friend married the guy she met here ( pity as you had some great dating stories lol) I went to the wedding - everyone was normal.
They just celebrated a year.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 159
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Has anyone had success on here?
Posted: 12/17/2014 5:45:39 PM
Hey All,

WOW.... Never expected all this. Thanks guys. Anyway, merry Christmas and Happy New year. I'm going out of the country for about three weeks, and will be offline all that time. So everyone have a safe and happy holiday season. Catch you all in January. :-)
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