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 castlehillsmile
Joined: 11/4/2015
Msg: 76
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50Page 4 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
^^^ Congrats on the new job.

If an international airline, I have a spare room.
 throttle_junkie
Joined: 7/13/2013
Msg: 77
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 12/16/2015 7:32:19 PM
I wish POF would make their mail settings a bit more granular than ANY-75 miles. For me anything over ~40 miles (one way) or so is unworkable.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 78
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 12/17/2015 9:25:15 PM
I did the "two hours away long distance thing" for four years when I was 40....that was fun, exciting, and new. Now, it would tire me out.
 BlackOnyx48
Joined: 12/6/2015
Msg: 79
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/3/2016 1:28:56 PM
A single woman in her 60's, simply doesn't have that many options.
Generally, you've met people during your journey that are either available, or can hook you up with someone.
Being, that's not the case here...you'll have to make do with the local fare...regardless how unsavory !!!
 Peppermint_Petunias
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 80
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/3/2016 2:49:28 PM
Had good experiences in my 20's ,40's and after 50 w long distance.Just because i didnt marry them doesnt mean it wasnt worth it.
Branch out.
You dont HAVE to have moolah, but one of you needs a bit of traveling money .Skip the hair and nail salon once or that new chrome bumper you wanted.
Skip a few lunches and starbucks. Gas is a fair price now.Drive if its 3 hours or less.
Heck some people drive 9 hours one way.

If you just re connected w an old friend or relative 200 miles or more away would you not make a way to visit?
Dont limit yourself.

You meet the right one on line and have a connection, you'll change your mind.
 pinedrop
Joined: 7/29/2015
Msg: 81
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/4/2016 11:28:13 PM
I did the "two hours away long distance thing" for four years when I was 40....that was fun, exciting, and new. Now, it would tire me out.

We seem to be of a similar age. So if I may opine. I personally do not pursue long distance relationships although at times it does seem like that is where the most interesting prospects would reside. In other words the broader the net the more the fish if numbers were the game. But it is not. I only need one. And hopefully she is in the same town or maybe one town over. One lady said i came from a town of inbreds just because she was two towns over and that was too far for me. Imagine that.

A true story : Last winter an area neighbor went on line to find his true love. The locals would know how poor he really was so a long distance relationship might work better. (i actually gave hime the money to go online). Anyway it wasn't long till he found her, sitting on the beach in some retirement villa in Mexico. They seemed to have this torrid love affair all online and were in love. She was a blonde and quite attractive. They were like teenagers on the phone constantly. He was sure she was the one and apparently she was thinking the same.She sent him some pretty good photos I might add. So he was all ready to go to Mexico and live on the Beach with her. Well first he needed some money so i suggested he sell off his pigs since he would not be here to care for them anyway. So he sold his pigs and chickens got a passport and off to Mexico.

Well i think the love affair lasted a whole week or two in real life. He was not what she needed, he was broke and she was not what he needed she was broke financially. She dumped him and his dog at some border town but he was ready to go home anyway he just didn't have a ride back to Oregon.

Kind of funny to me. The power of wishful thinking and self dissillusionment is immense.
 Chromis1
Joined: 9/9/2015
Msg: 82
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/5/2016 6:46:34 AM
^^^^ Moral of the story: Love is fickle. Pigs are forever.
 50ThousandAnd1
Joined: 12/28/2015
Msg: 83
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/5/2016 7:13:48 AM
It is not easy relocating for love. I did so (but not meeting from OLD, but a former professional contact) & getting homesick & missing ur kids, friends & family can suck.

Frequent flyer miles do come in handy tho ;0)
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 84
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/5/2016 8:13:52 AM

pinedrop
She was a blonde and quite attractive.

And now she’s available again? Send contact information, forthwith.

Wait a minute … If she’s so attractive, why haven’t you made a move here? I smell a fish!


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 Rythmn
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 85
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/6/2016 12:16:06 AM
Some wonderful stories here about long distance working. I remember one from long ago. There is always something special that can occur, although yes, not that likely and clearly obvious that there is no potential. Just have to use your common sense and intuition. I have had several people in my very big state, willing to travel to meet me. One expected more than I would be willing to give, no matter how much we talked on the phone, so I saved him the trouble. Yet, I see some potential currently and will explore if I think the person has long term possibilities. Our correspondence has "substance". I cannot do the initial driving but am downsizing and flexible to a degree where I move. I guess it depends on how high on the priority list a good relationship falls and the reality that it always is not in your backyard. Although I certainly try and keep "open". Also at retirement age, there is more time/flexibility to consider this option. But not more than a very long drive, unless you want someone with a plane or money. Unfortunately that often, for me, gets to be living his lifestyle and not mine. My fancy days are by choice over. Looking for simple and writing my book. Then my bucket list, determined in childhood oddly, will be done: a "good" relationship and my book!
 Rythmn
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 86
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/6/2016 12:21:16 AM
made a typo above in my post. meant to write "when there is no potential". was told a moderator would have to review to erase and restart. thought there were no more moderators! we will see. if erased this will make no sense. sorry:)
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 87
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/6/2016 6:59:20 AM
Everybody is looking for that one perfect person, the most perfect person on the planet, who is the ultimate match for life, but that person must live in the same city/area, because it's too much trouble if they aren't local. Which leads me to believe that there are hundreds or thousands of people around who could be Mr./Miss Total Perfection. That's why almost everybody gets married at least once, even though they weren't searching the entire country or the entire world for their perfect match and were only interested in their local market-even if it's only in a one horse hick town. The older people get, the further they get away from the fairy tale fantasy, and less likely to search extensively for total perfection, and do the ultimate sin of "settling" (gasp, cough, cough).
 Chromis1
Joined: 9/9/2015
Msg: 88
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/6/2016 7:49:04 AM
Here's a rundown of the the length of time to travel one way for some of the people I dated more than twice, took a chance with, etc.:

1) 1:45
2) 5:00
3) 2:30
4) 1:15
5) 0:50

The woman I'm dating now: 12 minutes! It's awesome.

No more long distance for me.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 89
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/13/2016 9:21:04 AM
I would think when you get older, and especially if you retire, relocation wouldn't be a big deal. Or traveling extended times for recreation. But the 30-50 year old group likely have a career that prevents them from traveling. One could own a home, which makes relocating a bigger deal.

Distance traveled in time, OK I'll play.

The two women I married.

1) 30 Seconds
2) 24 hours, 18 hours of that was flying.


1) (I could see into her living room apt from my apt)
2) No direct flight from Chicago to Thailand.

Everyone else has been in-between those times.

Outside of marriage, I had a 10 year relationship with a GF that was first 40 minutes away, then 1 hour, and after that it was a 3 hour flight. But we would spend the entire weekend together, and if I flew it would be the entire week or more.

I find it inconvenient to drive more than 1 hour. It's not far enough away to automatically stay overnight, but far enough away to be a hassle. One women I dated briefly, we worked together but she lived 1.5 hours away. It was just too much, as we were both living at home with parents.

I don't find distance to be a highly significant preference, though someone close is nicer. However someone in a distant foreign culture is much more exciting to meet and date than meeting a typical person at the local coffee shop.
 JujuO12
Joined: 8/18/2015
Msg: 90
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/17/2016 7:57:17 AM
How does that even work? Long distance relationship? HOW can you possibly know anything that person says is true?? How do you not sleep with them on the first date? There is a certain familiarity that you have that YOU WILL SLEEP WITH THEM ON THE FIRST DATE. People do not tell you about all the guys they showed up after 3 months of talking on the phone and exchanging emails,,,,,, He slept with her and she never heard from him again. OR that it turn out he was married. OR it turns out HE was nothing like he said he was in those emails and phone conversations. BECAUSE those they are ashamed of being taken advantage of. OR the number of women who send a bunch of provocative, sexy pictures to men they never meet.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 91
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/18/2016 7:01:18 AM

How does that even work? Long distance relationship? HOW can you possibly know anything that person says is true?? How do you not sleep with them on the first date? There is a certain familiarity that you have that YOU WILL SLEEP WITH THEM ON THE FIRST DATE. People do not tell you about all the guys they showed up after 3 months of talking on the phone and exchanging emails,,,,,, He slept with her and she never heard from him again. OR that it turn out he was married. OR it turns out HE was nothing like he said he was in those emails and phone conversations. BECAUSE those they are ashamed of being taken advantage of. OR the number of women who send a bunch of provocative, sexy pictures to men they never meet.


Fair questions, and good deduction.

In a long distant relationship, communication is frequent and more intense. If you pay attention, red flags and intent becomes more obvious with time. But intent is never really clear IMO.

But the truth is hard to come by even when dating locally.

And depends on what sort of truth you are looking for. I think married is fairly obvious fairly soon if they are living together, easy enough to figure that out. Intent (casual sex, or wanting to get married / LTR, etc) is never really obvious even if dating locally. At least with a long distance relationship, there is the commitment of more communication and expense of travel.

Yes, I think having sex fairly soon is common when long distance partners first get together. If not the first date, the first week. I think that is a bonus.

Never hearing from him/her again is also fairly common, but it's also common when dating locally, most new relationships / dating / meets don't last a long time. As long as you both had a fun time, what's the problem? Only if one or the other takes it very seriously is there a real concern, and that does happen.

You may not hear from women about men who meet then she never hears from then again, but I know of several that happened to. One women in particular was singing the blues about that for 6 months on her profile. I liked her and we exchanged some limited MSGS, but I never got the chance to meet her, I was otherwise involved, then she got involved with someone with poor results.

It's my guess women sending provocative, sexy pictures are most often trolling for cash but are often willing to meet, just that the meet/sex involves money sooner or later. If they never want to meet, maybe they aren't women after all? Video communications should eliminate some of that.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 92
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/19/2016 4:53:51 AM

HOW can you possibly know anything that person says is true??


Some would call that "knowledge" trust.


The rest of what was typed is confusing, for those trying to follow it. As in, what are you trying to say/ask??????

Are you trying to say keeping the distance between two potentials to a minimum will eliminate the dirt bags outta the equation????? If so, you obviously don't know people very well.
 Whatsamattababy
Joined: 12/24/2015
Msg: 93
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/19/2016 8:37:42 PM
I think I could probably get along well with someone who lives really really far away.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 94
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 1/20/2016 6:42:03 PM
Well, I am actually semi-retired, and work 6 days a week, so long distance would be problematic for me. And winter travel over icy roads......not for me. And I don't think that it would be fair to someone I met for them to do all the traveling because he had an open schedule and I did not.
 pennsylvaniasummer
Joined: 2/2/2016
Msg: 95
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 2/10/2016 4:33:42 AM
Nobody on this planet is worth traveling hours for hours.
 seamus6200
Joined: 6/24/2015
Msg: 96
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 2/10/2016 8:19:35 AM
hey sunny congrats if you ever fly into worc let me know
 Chromis1
Joined: 9/9/2015
Msg: 97
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 2/10/2016 9:21:18 AM

Nobody on this planet is worth traveling hours for hours.


Yeah, your opinion only.

You're that nurse Christmas chick who was here a while ago, ain't ya?
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 98
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 2/10/2016 9:26:30 AM

Nobody on this planet is worth traveling hours for hours.


There was this really hot chick on Venus that I was interested in, it seemed like we were on fire.

But then she got hooked on this cool dude from Pluto.

So sad, long distances didn't work out for me.
 JaiNai2
Joined: 5/30/2015
Msg: 99
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 2/10/2016 10:07:38 AM
I've wondered about that too! Even though I've always specified that I was only interested in men living in or near my area, I've heard from men living far away. If two people are communicating long distance, they should discuss early on which of them would be willing to relocate. And even when I was younger than 50, I always knew I would never leave my family and life here.

I'm actually suspicious of people who have to travel across country to find romance. I know it works out well for some, but seems a bit risky to me.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 100
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LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 2/10/2016 10:09:22 AM
Well, there are lots of instances of LD relationships that form and work out just fine. If everyone thought that LD was not workable, soldiers, sailors, expat workers, mail order brides and many, many other scenarios would be in total despair. Of course, they are not.

Its easy to fall in love with a LD partner. Just a little harder to bring it to fulfillment. But that will depend on what the parties really want.
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