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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Eternitygracesme
Joined: 5/18/2015
Msg: 342
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it? Page 15 of 16    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)

As for "banging anything with a pulse", sometimes sex is just sex and there is nothing wrong with that. But the best is still with someone that means something to you.


It seems she means a great deal to him.
 ThePig0fYourDreams
Joined: 2/2/2015
Msg: 343
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 5:46:58 AM
So, in a nutshell. As men grow older, they can count on either getting hookers or kissing ass to gain a woman's attention, and disregarding respect (because it won't keep your warm at night, apparently) as a crucial element in a relationship??

I have just one question.

What about all that "I refuse to settle" crap we see kicked around here so often?

Hmmm.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 344
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 6:13:11 AM
Pig, I have to say your tenacity is admirable!


What about all that "I refuse to settle" crap we see kicked around here so often?


Now if ohenry had said she was so so in the looks dept. and he chose this path....then hmmm maybe he settled, but as he appears smitten by her maybe it's more of grabbing for that elusive brass ring?
 ThePig0fYourDreams
Joined: 2/2/2015
Msg: 345
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 6:22:50 AM
This isn't Pig. I am rockin-trucker. I hacked his account.

I kid.

But anyway, sure, if she is what he considers attractive, one could say he's not settling in the physical appearance aspect, but in terms of allowing disrespect, that could very well be deemed settling.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 346
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 6:24:52 AM
I had a guy drop out on me after a date. Was a little over a month until I heard from him again. Actually, I had to churn my brain to remember who was this guy by this name? He ran out the first date after going to the bathroom(his cell phone in his hand), at a Mexican restaurant. Lemonade and water was only ordered so far. Lied to me then, and stood there and said, "I'm not over my old gf yet."He fessed up he was married on the 2nd date that I only caved to agreeing to go out with him so he would stop texting me. I informed him before agreeing to the 2nd date that I would only be drinking soda, as I watched him suck down 6 beers and his truth came out. Somewhere in there, I said, "Good for your wife going out. Good for her." Lol

slimy, just slimy, no respect for people, just gets me.
 SLAFFA
Joined: 8/13/2007
Msg: 347
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 1:16:18 PM
My odds are very slim and none with no pics up and no Fishmeets in over 3 years. [even though where I live, I can pretty much find at least one a week within a half hour drive] But that's MY choice... to simply watch from the sidelines at least for the time being. And honestly, my 4 legged BFF gives me most of what I need in a companion. I had no trouble at all meeting tons of attractive intelligent women "living in the RW" who got the "big picture" when I chose to have pics up 5 years ago. OLD is an excellent way to meet folks IF and only IF one utilizes the obvious strengths of OLD and ignores the inherent weaknesses. Succumbing to the apparent "power", hook, line and sinker of OLD catalog shopping is why most people have such "poor luck". Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. And few are willing to change their SOP the slightest little bit.

Funny thing about Forum participation though. It's a constant reminder that women can have a slew of great pics and a well written/very appealing and/or well matching profile and have a much different take on life and how they "interact" with others [per their Forum input] than my own. Maybe OLD has corrupted their take on men/the world?

Probably not a good idea to try to extrapolate Forum women in general to "regular" female Fish though.
 ThePig0fYourDreams
Joined: 2/2/2015
Msg: 348
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 1:27:18 PM

I'm sure a few of us has fallen into that trap, when we were young and inexperienced though.


I can honestly say only once, and I beat the everloving shit out of myself for it. Profusely ashamed. I took a lot of crap, and didn't retaliate.

I was raised by a hard as nails grandmother, and she would roll over in her grave if I ever allowed it again.


And, I do feel for her, but no dammed way I'm riding along with her on the crazy train to drama-ville.


Right on. If she has that little trust in him, she's with the wrong person.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 349
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 1:44:16 PM

I can honestly say only once, and I beat the everloving shit out of myself for it. Profusely ashamed. I took a lot of crap, and didn't retaliate.

I was raised by a hard as nails grandmother, and she would roll over in her grave if I ever allowed it again.


I just knew you must have had some sort of history of being disrespected for you to be so sensitive about the issue.
 ThePig0fYourDreams
Joined: 2/2/2015
Msg: 350
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 1:58:35 PM
My penchant for logic was the driving force more than any sort of sensitivity.
 mjinict
Joined: 8/13/2008
Msg: 351
view profile
History
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 3:25:00 PM
I think generally there's a difference between being young and naive and being taken advantage of, and being in your sixties, with a lifetime of experience to go off of. Probably the pain is lesser, as you can tend to see it coming to an end easier.
 WYSIWYG1967
Joined: 7/1/2015
Msg: 352
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 3:35:07 PM
I've not had great luck with men in the past. I was picked on relentlessly from seventh grade on. I learned very quickly that who I was was no longer important. Prior to seventh grade, I was a bright, articulate child. Adults thought I was great. In seventh grade, it all changed. I was no longer cute. Still articulate and bright, but I heard "you're ugly, you're ugly, you're ugly" all the time. So I learned it wasn't who I was, but what I LOOKED like.

So what happens if you beat a dog with a stick every time it eats, drinks water, walks around and when it goes to the bathroom? It starts to cringe and probably will avoid the abuser. Add in several people doing that, and the dog will probably avoid people as much as it can and no doubt will be very unhappy.

I let my past define me too much, but I was that dog. I saw men as threats--either they would insult me or literally beat me over the head (which happened in school more than once.)

So for a long time, I hoped to find a guy, but really didn't put much effort into it because I figured no one would want me. And I was pretty much right. I try to explain to people about my relationships with men and how terrible it's been, and I frequently get blank stares--sometimes I get the suggestion I should date women. I am NOT a lesbian. I've had terrible schoolgirl crushes on men, but they are not available. They were either married or had girlfriends.

I recently had plastic surgery, and I feel like I have a more normal profile. I still need to lose some weight, but I'm not anything close to morbidly obese. I wish I'd had the surgery sooner. I think it could have been a game changer, but I'll never know.

After being out of a relationship for almost five years, I finally got one some dating sites. Here's the problem though: I look younger than my actual age. When I look for men my age, I really haven't seen any profiles that look interesting to me. And the pictures are technically bad. I've had some photography training, and I can't understand why men would put bad pictures on a dating site. I can't honestly see myself with a lot of these guys. It's sort of hard to see what they actually look like.

I feel like I have so little dating experience that I wouldn't be interesting to any men on the site. I got on the site to see if I could find someone to hang out with occasionally in order to distract me from a crush I have on a former classmate. We reconnected at a recent reunion, and he's a huge fan of my writing and told me so. He said such nice things that it was very easy to fall for him. Of course, he's married. He didn't tell me that until two weeks after the reunion. He knows so much about me that it's very attractive. I told him about my lack of dating experience and my inability to meet any decent men, and he actually sympathized with me. Most men are dismissive and unsympathetic, or else say I should try dating women. It gets extremely annoying to hear that. He was the first man EVER to actually offer sympathy. We have some things in common, and he's known me, or at least been aware of me since kindergarten, and was able to prove it. I wish I'd paid more attention to him, and I wish he would have reached out to me in high school. It would have been nice to have one nice guy friend so I would have felt "normal." But I honestly have to say I'm totally attracted to this man. He's well traveled, brilliant, kind, thoughtful, has a good job, we have some of the same interests and I love the way he looks.

So I don't know. Sometimes I think it's honestly too late for me, and I should have had that plastic surgery earlier, and really made a serious effort to find a guy earlier. I do like being by myself, but on occasion, it would be nice to have a guy friend to do stuff with on occasion. I'm doing some things to make myself a better person, and I need to realize I need to be happy with myself and have a good life, a fulfilling life, and if I never meet a guy I did, I'm going to have to accept that. It would be nice to meet a guy I really am over the moon for (actually, I've already met him, but he's taken) but I think I have to be realistic as well. I don't think my odds are very good at all, especially for the area I live in. I don't feel 48, and I don't look 48, but I AM 48. I can't do anything about the past, but I can try and do something about the future. I can increase my education, and better my financial situation, and try and create a life that makes others envy it. I don't necessarily need a man for that, but I am human, after all.
 sviitmore
Joined: 7/11/2015
Msg: 353
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 3:52:56 PM
I'm sure its not easy being a plain Jane and having difficulty with guys. On the other hand, there are plenty of plain Janes who are in relationships, married, with families. Lots of it has to do with attitude and personality.

I can tell you that I have been with some very attractive women, but I can also tell you that some very attractive women develop issues that are sometimes not easy to deal with and make them non-relationship material for any guys who have half a brain.

In the end, if a woman does not have outright beauty to attract a guy, then she needs to work on other factors, things she can control, like how sweet and warm a person she is. That can make up for a lot of deficiencies in the looks department and not having those attributes can never be trumped by looks alone.

Its all in the total picture. It really is.

Edit to add I have a cousin who has been morbidly obese most of her life. She still is. She also happens to be married to a guy who is slim, professionally employed and probably a sever or eight out of ten in the looks department. Sometimes less attractive women convince themselves that they are undateable, when they are only undateable to a percentage of guys not all guys. And in the end, looks don't matter. As people age, they tend to regress towards the norm in the looks department.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 354
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 3:56:32 PM

I recently had plastic surgery, and I feel like I have a more normal profile. I still need to lose some weight, but I'm not anything close to morbidly obese. I wish I'd had the surgery sooner. I think it could have been a game changer, but I'll never know.


Like gastric bypass surgery? Or something else?
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 355
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 4:15:14 PM
Hold up!!! Someone is riding the crazy train to Dramaville?

Well.....where's my ticket??


Oh heck.....let me grab my bottle of wine and don my camo.....yeah.....can't forget the night vision goggles!

Forget the ticket! I'm gonna drive the train! Ya know why?


Cause I have a feeling.....

Somebody's gonna hurt someone....probably, before the night is through...
Somebody's gonna come undone....And...ya know what?

There's nothin' we can do....

Everybody wants to touch somebody
Even if it takes all night....

Am I right, Mr. Ohenry? ;) ;)

Yeah.... everybody wants to take a little chance
Make it come out right...

So watch out cause....


There's gonna be a heartache tonight
A heartache tonight, I know
There's gonna be a heartache tonight
A heartache tonight, I know
Lord, I know
 ThePig0fYourDreams
Joined: 2/2/2015
Msg: 356
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 4:48:38 PM


I feel like I have so little dating experience that I wouldn't be interesting to any men on the site.


Well, I have good news.

First of all, there are more men out there than just the ones on this site. Secondly, I believe there are men out there who would find a sense of purity in your lacking dating experience, but it's ultimately up to you to not let yourself feel inferior about it or it could create problems. You have to truly believe you deserve it.

You've come too far to give up any hope. F*ck the past. Just keep kicking ass. Someone will be impressed.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 357
view profile
History
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 5:04:24 PM

A 64 yr old man, regardless of his charm, intelligence, sexiness & wit would still have a hard time getting laid, let alone w/ a woman who is more in demand. He's not stupid, but quite a few people in here are saying in essence, "no"...why should he not enjoy a sexual raltionship (that hopefully has some emotionality attached to it)???


Really? Apparently you don't know the Adventurejoe family, my father is 78 and just complained to me that he is more hornier than usual and if he wasn't in love with his hot domestic partner(my father and her are dancing in a lady gagga video) he would be banging many of the younger women who flirt with him! Like PIG said, a man who keeps in shape after 40, after 50,60 etc has MUCH more chances than a younger guy.

I still can't believe at times how easy it gets as one ages! I am looking forward to age and Viagra NOW :P

*PS-- my pops is nice enough to spare me the IG graphic details lol
 loveisatemple
Joined: 3/28/2014
Msg: 358
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 6:28:50 PM
She could be Jodi Arias, or have all the charm of Ann Coulter, etc..but the important thing is she looks fetching in a tube top...playing like a fiddle or no, one has to keep one's priorities in order.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 359
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 6:28:52 PM
I'm hoping HENRY lasts as long as this thread :/
Joe - your Father sounds like fun. And praise the heavens re the details.. but what if
what if he KNOWS all the secrets? The magic?
Does he have a single Bro? LOL
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 360
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 6:54:37 PM
For many People on the Forums, this Video is fitting......

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZdOptEJk0K8
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 361
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 7:28:16 PM

Probably not a good idea to try to extrapolate Forum women in general to "regular" female Fish though.


Oh, I don't know about that.

The opinions and attitudes expressed here by the majority of the Forum women go a long way towards explaining the behavior of the majority of the dating side women in Southern California who never venture to the Forums.


My odds are very slim and none with no pics up and no Fishmeets in over 3 years


I had no trouble at all meeting tons of attractive intelligent women "living in the RW" who got the "big picture" when I chose to have pics up 5 years ago.


This illustrates one of my pet peeves about online dating sites.

Were you a completely different person when your pics were up?
Were you a better human being when your pics were up?
If all of your info is the same whether you have a pic or not, and it is appealing and shows possible compatibility, then not having a pic up should not be such a big obstacle in the "big picture", so to speak. (pun intended)
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 362
view profile
History
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 10:08:21 PM

kj521
Somebody's gonna hurt someone....probably, before the night is through...
Somebody's gonna come undone....And...ya know what?

There's nothin' we can do....

Everybody wants to touch somebody
Even if it takes all night....

Am I right, Mr. Ohenry? ;) ;)

Indeed you are, KJ. As wise as you are beautiful.



Yeah.... everybody wants to take a little chance
Make it come out right...

So watch out cause....


There's gonna be a heartache tonight
A heartache tonight, I know
There's gonna be a heartache tonight
A heartache tonight, I know
Lord, I know

Ah, the Eagles. A great song. Back in 1976, I dated a woman. For about a year. I was crazy in love. She had a roommate, her cousin actually, who hung out with us. And her cousin was a huge Eagles fan. I listened and become a huge Eagles fan myself. Some very good memories there. And with your crazy train, here’s some lyrics from a truly great train song:


In the shuffling madness
Of the locomotive breath,
Runs the all, time loser,
Headlong to his death.
He feels the piston scraping
Steam breaking on his brow
Old Charlie stole the handle and
The train it won't stop going
No way to slow down.
He sees his children jumping off
At the stations one by one.
His woman and his best friend
In bed and having fun.
He's crawling down the corridor
On his hands and knees
Old Charlie stole the handle and
The train it won't stop going
No way to slow down.
He hears the silence howling
Catches angels as they fall.
And the all-time winner
Has got him by the balls.
He picks up Gideons Bible
Open at page one
God He stole the handle and
The train won't stop going
No way to slow down.

I saw them perform this in concert, about 1971? Great song, great concert.


Ouija2025
I'm hoping HENRY lasts as long as this thread :/

This thread seems to have gained a life of it’s own. I’m thinking the thread might outlive ME, never mind my affair.
 clooneystutor
Joined: 3/8/2015
Msg: 363
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 10:20:39 PM
Despite all the critics, including myself....

I actually wish you the best on your journey to find love and happiness :)
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 364
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 10:37:07 PM

ohenryx:
I saw them perform this in concert, about 1971? Great song, great concert.


Aqualung/Thick as a Brick Tour? Was there a old fashion Telephone on stage?

Did Ian Anderson answer it & then come to the Mike to say?

"There is an urgent telephone call for Mike Nelson.
I believe there's a fish on the line."
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 365
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/15/2015 11:10:45 PM
Well, I'd say this is off topic, but I'm not really sure that's relevant anymore here:

My favourite train lyric is from Paul Simon. "Everybody loves the sound of a train in the distance. Everybody thinks it's true."
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 366
view profile
History
What do you think your odds are? Why? Are you o.k. about it?
Posted: 7/16/2015 11:26:14 AM


As for "banging anything with a pulse", sometimes sex is just sex and there is nothing wrong with that. But the best is still with someone that means something to you.
It seems she means a great deal to him.

I think that's the key point. He sees her as a rare catch that he's surprised he could ever really get in Any way. A "holy cow"; many of us run into that with enough dating experience. This isn't at all about having sex with anything/anyone, which is why Henry's situation is gender-neutral. Both men & women can run into someone who's out of their league in which they're mesmorized by that hardly comes around so often. If so, physical engagement is going to be wanted by either gender when they're the "lesser" person being so ga-ga about the "higher" person... and what one "gets" out of it, can also be material things on the higher-than-normal end (gifts, expensive dinners, etc), or social popularity.

Henry's position seems to be: As long as the lesser person is getting what they want (physical rewards, attention in general from someone higher, material goods, or social popularity/fame) -- that higher person can treat them like sh!t all they want, And It's OK or even something to Appreciate -- if treated like sh!t in a particular way that's also part of a suave chasing-game, as it's a Good/Fulfilling experience for that lesser-person.

She could be Jodi Arias, or have all the charm of Ann Coulter, etc..but the important thing is she looks fetching in a tube top...playing like a fiddle or no, one has to keep one's priorities in order.

Jodi Arias is kinda hot. That would be quite a roll in the hay -- just don't cheat on her. Like, delete your POF account once you go out on a date with her - lol.
Ann Coulter? Gawd. If the mesmorizing, out-of-my-league gal had the "charm" of Ann Coulter and I was taking her sh!t, there's No Way I could be enjoying the experience! That'd be a true "being the submissive" fetish, right there.
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