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 Following_Up
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 151
Men Who Never Learned to CookPage 7 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
Slightly OffT but since we are talking about fixing toilets.....

A couple years ago I had to replace the flushing mechanism in one of my toilets. The man I was seeing at the time (had been dating him about a month (ish)) offered and I told him 'Thanks so much, but I'll do it, it's good for my girls (19 and 21 at the time, both home for the summer from college) to see me doing these things and learning how to do this type of task themselves.

He got kind of butt hurt over it. (Ah the old 'I Initially like that you are an independent woman but ... wait! You are 'too independent'!) I mentioned this on the forums (I was some other user name then, g*d knows what it was) and someone told me that I really should have 'let him' do this because men need to 'do' for women to show them that they care.

So... damned if you do and damned if you don't? lol

I still say I know when a relationship is a good fit FOR ME because I love doing things for people I care about. So to fix a meal for a man and have him appreciate it? That is just gold. My current fellow is a better cook than me but he's very gracious when I throw a meal together.
 TALL_IQ2
Joined: 12/22/2014
Msg: 152
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 7:41:37 AM

(Ah the old 'I Initially like that you are an independent woman but ... wait! You are 'too independent'!) I mentioned this on the forums (I was some other user name then, g*d knows what it was) and someone told me that I really should have 'let him' do this because men need to 'do' for women to show them that they care.


I think that may have been me giving you that sage advice. When a man you like offers to help "fix things" that need fixing, IF you are fixin to want to keep him around for a while, LET HIM HELP YOU!

That is the basic Ben Franklin human nature tactic, when you LET someone do you a favor or help you, they end up liking you a bit more. It works!

When you resist or decline their help, it feels like a stab in the chest for many men who had good intentions...

S
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 153
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Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 8:07:18 AM

If you think fixing a leak or replacing the brake pads takes an expert, they you are right....The easy tasks are easy, but once you move up the chain beyond the simple, experience counts for a lot in all areas of life.


I agree...which is why i go to a professional to have those jobs done and wouldn't consider tackling them on my own....although I usually DO make a pain in the ass of myself while they work by asking questions....lol

But what we're talking about here, originally, is cooking a meal, not necessarily a gourmet meal, just a meal....

Don't get me wrong...I have and will continue to, cook for the men in my Life on occasion....Just so they appreciate it enough to NOT want to lose that treat by taking it for granted.... :)

Also...if we BOTH hate cooking, then we can do it together and/or take turns etc.

As mentioned earlier in the thread here, most men have NOT grown up starving to Death and for me, it's the EXPECTATION of me doing all of the "traditionally female" tasks that really irks me...as though I'm biologically hard-wired for cooking and cleaning etc. or something....

Last I checked, the ONLY thing that I am biologically hard-wired to do, is to gestate and give birth....period.

Everything else, is up for grabs....
 Demidar
Joined: 10/22/2014
Msg: 154
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 8:20:59 AM
The amusing thing about this whole thread is it was just another , see women can do anything better than men thread . I am starting to agree with the reviews I read about this site ie. at least 50% of the women's profiles are fake . Many of these female posters act far to much like they are frustrated males . Unfortunately , men do not like to be around masculine women , sorry , sad but true .
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 155
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 8:28:21 AM
^^^So true. This is just another gender bashing thread.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 156
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Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 8:30:59 AM
^^^^^^^^^
What I find amusing here is that you, ONCE again, have decided to paint ALL women with the same brush....

Oh no! Wait a minute!

That's NOT "amusing", just boring and predictable, as usual....
 Following_Up
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 157
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 8:36:50 AM
^^^ I hear ya Dee.

I mean at least 1 female poster took the OP to task a bit for her comments and just a few posts up, I made the statement that the man I'm seeing IS A BETTER COOK THAN ME.

How that translates into 'women can do everything better' I don't know.
 Fire_and_Ice4_You
Joined: 10/28/2014
Msg: 158
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 8:42:20 AM

If you don't have any motivation, put it this way......cooking GETS YOU LAID

Agreed.....I could watch a man cook for me all day and if he's better than me...who cares!
It's not a deal breaker for me if he doesn't cook....however.
I like working with my man.....my husband and I worked well together...we rebuilt our home and started a business together.
Welcome back.."Following up and congrats to LiliM".....there are decent men out there.

I see Dumbidar is flirting with us ladies again...what a guy...wink...wink...
He's like that little boy pulling our pigtails in school....anything for attention.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 159
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Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 9:06:13 AM

How that translates into 'women can do everything better' I don't know.


Me EITHER!!!
I thought we were talking about men who DON'T cook or "can't", and why THAT is a problem, not who does it better...LOL

Good to see you back R....

@demidar...Really?????
"Men don't like 'masculine' women" now, is it????
So, let me see if I got this straight now....

If we WANT men to do the "traditional" things like paying for a date, etc. we are goldigging users and when we can and choose to do it for OURSELVES, now we're "masculine"?????

Wow....as someone else said, seems like we're damned if we do and damned if we don't....
 DietFree
Joined: 11/1/2012
Msg: 160
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Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 9:19:54 AM
^^^ Damn!

I don't think that he meant "masculine women"; just that women refusing help is a turn-off (I guess).
 Following_Up
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 161
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 9:30:34 AM
^^ If any of the 'masculine women' stuff was at all related to me bumbling around fixing a toilet so it would flush again??

LOL. I can honestly say no one I've dated has ever told me they thought I was masculine. Now, I have gotten 'too independent' but usually because I wanted to continue to be essentially the person I am, the person that the man making the charge allegedly was really attracted to when we first met.

I was just relating that circumstance to a couple of guys shooting out that we (women) should be able to fix a toilet, etc and how when I did it once, it made a guy I had started dating 'upset' (way beyond what was reasonable, IMHO).

I broke up with that guy from a couple years ago, not long after 'toilet flusher-gate' and maybe the reason I didn't jump at his offer to help is that I wasn't thrilled about him continuing to be around. He found fault in too many things about me (while claiming to be in love with me, huh?) and I realized I wasn't a good fit for him and vice versa.

Now, the guy I'm seeing currently? My independence seems like a good fit for him because he has a full life (yay!) He can cook for me anytime (cause he's a great cook) and can also fix my toilet if he offers (if it breaks again - my fix has held for a couple of years cause I bought a higher quality replacement part, maybe?) He offered to look at/fix my garage door opener which was acting up and I took him up on it AND appreciated it very much.
 OneKewlDood
Joined: 5/21/2014
Msg: 162
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 9:37:35 AM

I broke up with that guy from a couple years ago, not long after 'toilet flusher-gate' and maybe the reason I didn't jump at his offer to help is that I wasn't thrilled about him continuing to be around. He found fault in too many things about me (while claiming to be in love with me, huh?) and I realized I wasn't a good fit for him and vice versa.

Now, the guy I'm seeing currently? My independence seems like a good fit for him because he has a full life (yay!) He can cook for me anytime (cause he's a great cook) and can also fix my toilet if he offers (if it breaks again - my fix has held for a couple of years cause I bought a higher quality replacement part, maybe?) He offered to look at/fix my garage door opener which was acting up and I took him up on it AND appreciated it very much.


I have always believed that you should be SUPPORTIVE of someone you love. Offer them help once, if they reject it then "Don't be afraid to ask, I'm happy to help." and leave it at that. People like the feeling of accomplishment, and far be it from me to take that away from them.

I think you made a good choice in dumping that first guy.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 163
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 9:39:52 AM

Unfortunately , men do not like to be around masculine women , sorry , sad but true .

Does this mean that men don't like to be around women who can fend for themselves by doing some things that were only considered gender specific a number of years ago? If such is the case, wouldn't it, therefore, follow that a man who can fend for himself by cooking (cleaning, laundry, etc. - former female gender roles) is considered a feminine man? I'm thinking it's actually the opposite, particularly with respect to the original poster of the thread...unless you're a man who still "expects" women to do all the former "female" duties, in which case that's more the thinking of a man who is afraid he'd look more feminine if he cooks in the presence of (or for) a female and therefore plays dumb like he doesn't have a clue how to cook...anything.
 Ladyinred4755
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 164
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 10:57:41 AM
Personally, I think the issue of whether or not a man can cook, was in this case NOT the issue.

Correct me if I'm wrong, Literate Hiker, but some of us know you a little better than others.
You are searching for a smart, witty man who will enjoy the company of /the companionship of, a smart, witty woman. A man who will appreciate a woman who is passionate about mountain hiking. A man who thinks along the same lines as you.

Bottom line, Jim did not meet your needs. Next...........
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 165
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 11:13:52 AM
All of this reminds me of the old joke, "Why are men like flooring? Lay them right,and you can walk all over 'em forever."

Cooking, like turbo boost, may get you laid. I suspect its the sensual nature, that makes one want to cook, that really does it. But, it still is a great bumpersticker line.

why do pros go to tech school? b/c it gets you a license, which gets you a job. Having said that, yeah, I don't want someone blowing by me on the highway, doing 100mph in a Camaro they welded together themself. I think its good to know what you can't do, and be at peace with that.

Ice in wine? I can understand ice in other alcohol, so when it melts the drink isn't so "neat". I remember back when I worked in the food industry, I had a coworker who would use melon balls rather than ice cubes in his ginger ale. not certain I would try it for some wines, esp. not something that's really well designed to stand on its own. some people would put neon on the Mona Lisa, I swear.

In the end, a man or a woman who has multiple talents, what back in the day we'd label a "Renaissance Man", is attractive to those who want someone out of the ordinary. i'd love to meet a woman who impresses me (I was going to say, "floors me", but that's too close to the joke above. As the Venezualians used to say, someone who sweeps the floor with me), but a hottie doesn't hurt, either :)

Its nice when someone wants to do something for me (unless I can see they're going to ruin something irreplaceable). Its a pity when it turns into a power struggle.
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 166
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Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 12:27:21 PM
You got a point dragonbits, there are matters that needs a professional jobs to be done. If I were a man I won't
underestimate the mentality of a woman, she knows what is professional job to be done in her car, house ect..


EXACTLY!!! These days, ANYBODY can be an expert!!!lol


Honestly, I won't buy that literally, like I am not buying that a man can't cook and cut a lemon. for that is a basic human needs, to eat..If I were that man I will ask the OP how she wants the limon cut slice thin or thick quartered or just halve ,ect.. I politically assume he learned something in his schooling. or a bartender put a cut limon in his drinks.

When my husband was alive ,he never dirty his hands ,he hired people to do things for his car/house/yard I thought that is a normal living,and I grew up in that kind of pattern. when he passed away , I don't even know how to put air/gauge in my tires, I pay $10.00 every time I need air in my tires, When I become poor I finally learned to asked a woman ,she looks like she think I am stupid, I don't blame her, but I got miffed when a mechanic yelled at me that I put too much air, I yelled back at him >how can you measure air ? He taught me to read the car book, and buy a tool gauge and how to use it. Excuse me ! I maybe a stupid woman ,but I am not his Stupid Wife.

The moral of my story is > never say Never Learned.
DON"T RELAY ON MEN TO PICK UP THE PIECES OF YOUR IGNORANCE AND WEAKNESS.
 Demidar
Joined: 10/22/2014
Msg: 167
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 12:41:53 PM
msg 158 " What I find amusing here is that you, ONCE again, have decided to paint ALL women with the same brush...." I realize that the number of women posting on these forums are but the smallest percent of the total number of women available . For you to say that ,shows some delusional and narcissistic thinking , thinking that the ten or so women here equals all women is pretty delusional . Most women are not like the bitter ones that are on these forums .
msg 170 : Sorry I do not buy into that romance ( man pays for everything ) scam any more . I do not do the knight in shining armor any more ( I used to be one of those ) , have since learned a lot and am not naive any longer . Seems some women equate a man not being naive with him being bitter , very amusing .
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 168
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Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 12:58:41 PM
Message #156.


Unfortunately, men do not like to be around masculine woman, sorry, sad but true.


demidar You may want to change your strategy to these masculine women, be a social skill gentleman, with a bonus of romancing her if she is your type, instead of checking around her place what you can fix ,while ogling her ASS, A poor shot.
Note:
I am not making this up.
 Following_Up
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 169
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 1:15:13 PM

Seems some women equate a man not being naive with him being bitter , very amusing .


And you seem to equate women posting on this forum with being bitter (I guess?)

I'm only one forum poster, but I'm a woman and am not bitter at all. I like men, I like the current man I'm seeing a lot - I mean, come on, he COOKS of course I like him :) But seriously he's great in a lot of ways and he seems to really be enjoying our relationship. No one is being taken advantage of, I like an 'equal effort' type of gig and he seems to as well.

Demidar, can you honestly say you are not at all bitter? Your posts reek of someone who has had very BAD past experiences with women. Isn't your advice generally 'just say no' to women/relationships/involvement no matter what the guy's question is?
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 170
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Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 1:36:01 PM
demitar Life is not just money and fukking, there are more to it than that. It sadden me to know that you pay for everything and got scammed.
My philosophy is what you sowed is what you reap.
How can you expect a woman comes to adore you if you are combatant and think of them in nasty view ?
I don't know you ,but I want you to have a happy life, (as a human being to another human being ) do you think it is wiser if you change your type ? Go for a man, it is not a crime to be a GAY. just my 2 cents.
 Literate_Hiker
Joined: 1/1/2015
Msg: 171
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 2:03:12 PM
Bluemoon:

i would think that if you had invited someone to stay with you, you would have taken some time to know him beforehand. He obviously wasn't a match or you expected too much. Was he at least good in bed?

Your alluding that I am promiscuous/easy is absurd and inappropriate in the forums.

Although Jim and I had long telephone conversations before he arrived, he did not disclose beforehand:

1.He has Selective Eating Disorder;
2. Parkinson's Disease (from exposure to Agent Orange during the Vietnam War);
3. Hasn't hiked a day in his life. "I love hiking!" he said on the phone. I took him to REI to get outfitted for hiking; and
4. Never learned to cook.

In person Jim was also intelligent, kind, generous and a good conversationalist. It turned out we were not a good match.
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 172
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 2:12:47 PM

Your alluding that I am promiscuous/easy is absurd and inappropriate in the forums.

Although Jim and I had long telephone conversations before he arrived, he did not disclose beforehand:

1.He has Selective Eating Disorder;
2. Parkinson's Disease (from exposure to Agent Orange during the Vietnam War);
3. Hasn't hiked a day in his life. "I love hiking!" he said on the phone. I took him to REI to get outfitted for hiking; and
4. Never learned to cook.

In person Jim was also intelligent, kind, generous and a good conversationalist. It turned out we were not a good match.


Reading your Trials & Tribulations of OLD for some time, LT, I'm reminded of this Quote from Paul Newman......

If you're playing a poker game and you look around the table and and can't tell who the sucker is, it's you.


As for the Male Poster who's posts are filled with of hatred of Women, & He sounds like a poster child of MGTOW..... Go, stop talking about it & just Go. My sound like a child threatening to take His Ball & Go Home...... Just Go, We don't need Your Ball, We have another one & the Game will Go On....

VVVVV Your post about knowing how to cook & getting laid..... We now See Who really is the Town Bicycle...VVVVVV
 Silverhawk_tkn
Joined: 12/3/2010
Msg: 173
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Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 2:13:31 PM

The amusing thing about this whole thread is it was just another , see women can do anything better than men thread


Hmmm........I'm not seeing it in this thread, dude, and trust me, I like waging a gender war when its warranted. This one is not one of those............
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 174
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 2:16:56 PM

1.He has Selective Eating Disorder;


Wha'ta h el l is a Selective Eating Disorder?

I may have it. I am selective when it comes to fast food. No Mcdonalds, BBK, Arby's, Subway, Pizza Hut.

I don't eat french fries, potato chips, chips and salsa, spaghetti and meatballs.

I have advanced stages of the dishease. Since I love to eat curry goat, Panak Paneer, Pho, Thai Curries, South American Chimichurri, Brasilian churrasco, Lebanese garlic speed, Naan, and anything that is totally SELECTIVE and weird.


LOL
 Literate_Hiker
Joined: 1/1/2015
Msg: 175
Men Who Never Learned to Cook
Posted: 1/22/2015 2:22:19 PM
InnerGorilla:
Wha'ta h el l is a Selective Eating Disorder?


At age 62, Jim never learned to cook and is the pickiest eater I’ve ever met. He was proud of himself for tasting for the first time (with me): lettuce, alfalfa sprouts, celery, tomato, cantaloupe, cherries, green onion, apricots, avocado, prawns… the list is endless. He did not even know how to cut a lemon in half. I had to show him. "With citrus fruits you cut around the equator," I said.

When Jim orders a BLT sandwich he says “hold the lettuce and tomato.” He eats just the bacon and bread. An extremely picky eater, he’s been living on white rice, pasta, bread and meat.

I introduced Jim to whole grains, vegetables and fruit that he gingerly tasted with tiny bites like a preschooler. When he arrived his face was gray, presumably from malnutrition. When he left his color was much better, he had lost weight and was tanned.
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