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 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 376
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Together forever, no marriage, separate homesto Page 16 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)

You see fellas! It's the middle of the night and I've got em lined up.
I told you I knew what I was doing!!


Congratulations, it's important to feel like you have mastered skills in your life and are the best at something and it has done wonders for your self esteem.

I doubt getting women on a forum angry at you is ever going to be an Olympic event, but now that the forums are unmoderated, maybe you will have some serious competition. Too bad we can't vote for who is the best.

My favs of the past had been TGIF, piggy and a hulking older guy named vampire?? who liked very young women.

Vamp was most like your style but on the other side of the age timeline, old man chasing teenage women.
 AgentNinety9
Joined: 6/9/2016
Msg: 377
Together forever, no marriage, separate homesto
Posted: 7/28/2016 8:30:04 AM
I've driven by the Elkhart School of Seduction a few times. Pretty damn gnarly as you'd expect, but seems to turn out quite a few skinny little self-congratulatory experts. You get too close to the neighborhood on Friday afternoon and it's like 47 sex-starved Steve Buscemis undressing you with their bulging eyes.
 ericaagain
Joined: 7/9/2016
Msg: 378
Together forever, no marriage, separate homesto
Posted: 7/28/2016 8:33:08 AM

I doubt getting women on a forum angry at you is ever going to be an Olympic event, but now that the forums are unmoderated, maybe you will have some serious competition. Too bad we can't vote for who is the best.

My favs of the past had been TGIF, piggy and a hulking older guy named vampire?? who liked very young women.


I have to agree Dragon. Although I don't recall the Vampire guy, I do remember chatting with TFIF who was quite the ladies man, a little rough around the edges but in private conversations was a gentleman. The same with Pig, another gentleman, good character and could slice n dice with the best of them. Those that truly pissed off the female population was Demindar but I doubt he has been laid since Nixon was President and will never get laid again.

As for the "classy" seeking younger or have found younger - Dragon, you always set the bar. You keep your standards high, were never boastful, arrogant or rude. Always the gentleman. See....it can be done. I have always respected how you spoke of how you found your young lady and how that young lady became your wife and life partner.

There is not much that is required to get laid....any stiff d!ck or vagina. Getting laid is never an issue, we can all find it and if we can't, we can buy but someone is always giving it away. The true standard of a man or woman is how they "look" at the opposite sex. When you only see a penis or a vagina...you're kind of rooting around in the mud with the dregs...you ARE the dregs. There is no pride is becoming a walking penis or vagina. There is nothing special about it. It takes no brains, no talent....nothing.

And again, this kid doesn't measure up to those that came before...the ones mentioned by Dragon. I'm sure some of us could add a name or two to the list.

I'd rather be know as a gentleman of character than a kid with a stiff d!ck.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 379
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Together forever, no marriage, separate homesto
Posted: 7/28/2016 9:13:10 AM
^^^ I sort of pitied Demindar , a guy with serious health problems with a latent MGTOW slant, but he did have a lot more cash then a lot of men his age, so his complaints about money I didn't sympathize with.

Piggy was a hit with most of the ladies, the classic tall long haired bad boy, but he couldn't handle any negative feedback.

TGIF could play the gentleman Jim but at his heart I didn't buy it.

Now the vamp?? fellow, he truly pissed off many, he bragged about lying about his age, had a lou ferrigno look, and used to post about the teenager girls he would attract on the beach. In his youth, maybe he was more like u2? Maybe someone remembers him?

BTW, U2 is hardly a kid, if 32 is a kid then I am middle aged.
 ScurvyLittleSpider
Joined: 11/23/2014
Msg: 380
Together forever, no marriage, separate homesto
Posted: 7/29/2016 11:12:09 AM

47 sex-starved Steve Buscemis undressing you with their bulging eyes.
Now that's hot.
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 381
Together forever, no marriage, separate homesto
Posted: 7/29/2016 11:16:35 AM
Which part? The bulging or the eyes?
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 382
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Together forever, no marriage, separate homesto
Posted: 7/31/2016 11:06:37 AM

You get too close to the neighborhood on Friday afternoon and it's like 47 sex-starved Steve Buscemis undressing you with their bulging eyes.

Ahhhh, Elkhart. One step up from Gary, as it will coat you with it's impeccable charm. :)

Getting laid is never an issue, we can all find it and if we can't, we can buy but someone is always giving it away.

I think that's how my sex-ed teacher in junior high summarized it.... ;)

There is no pride is becoming a walking penis or vagina. There is nothing special about it. It takes no brains, no talent....nothing.

If you mean being able to hookup pretty frequently & consistently, I think it would depend on the Who. For a girl, I agree -- takes no talent at all. When girls complain they can't find a guy who's interested in her and they only talk to her friends, etc -- I say "Walk into a bar with a shirt that says 'I'm DTF'," and you'll suddenly find attention swarming at ya. Of course, if a guy does that he'll get some chuckles from some guys and sneers from most women. If it only were so easy for your average/just-above-average Joes to walk home with a girl even 50% of the time he goes to the bar. Even to get a # every time he goes to a non-dead bar -- there's plenty of guys who struggle with that.

I will say it's not so much a lot of talent that comes into play -- unless it's dealing with a gal who's at least arguably a shade above your league. But if one's happily willing to aim a little low in comparison to themselves, to consistently get action & #s is all about Courage being the main factor. But courage on that level is something Many don'thave, so even that is looked up to by some. You can dislike it, sure -- but it doesn't mean it's some easy feat.
 xxchickxx
Joined: 7/26/2016
Msg: 383
Together forever, no marriage, separate homes
Posted: 8/9/2016 8:22:13 PM
I totally agree! That's my goal!
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 384
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Together forever, no marriage, separate homes
Posted: 8/10/2016 10:35:13 AM
I just realized a better way to word the difference that I feel that there is between what some of us think a relationship is and what others think it can be while still calling it a relationship:

- Some people "have some kind of relationship between them...as in, there is some way in which they relate or interact".

- Some people "have a relationship" (as opposed to there being a relationship between them).

Same word, but referring to two very different types of things.

Two rocks on the beach have a relationship between them - one's location can be viewed in relation to the other's, for example. But when the two rocks are tied together with a piece of string such they go through their little rock-lives together effectively as one in certain respects, then they have a Relationship.
 Fabreezey
Joined: 1/4/2014
Msg: 385
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Together forever, no marriage, separate homes
Posted: 8/15/2016 10:02:37 AM
Some people feel the need to denigrate every concept of a happy relationship that doesn't match theirs.

Rocks are gradually worn away over a period of time and probably quicker from the pressure and friction of being tied together.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 386
Together forever, no marriage, separate homes
Posted: 8/15/2016 10:43:49 AM
"Some people feel the need to denigrate every concept of a happy relationship that doesn't match theirs."

That's like politics and someone saying, f you don't support the politician I think is better, you are wrong and I am right.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 387
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Together forever, no marriage, separate homes
Posted: 8/15/2016 11:05:20 AM

Some people feel the need to denigrate every concept of a happy relationship that doesn't match theirs.

Well, I wouldn't go That far, but that's more applicable to boy-girl situations shortly after boy-meets-girl.

In this,this isn't about mere relationships. This is about Relationships already *established* as Together-Forever relationships, with the established notion that there will Never be a marriage, and they will Never want to live together.

IMO, a very different concept than a relationship that's been established, and the couple not desiring to move in together or get hitched in the present time.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 388
Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/16/2016 5:33:07 AM
Of course you can be in a loving committed relationship without sharing the same roof. Unless there is more - like it has to be a minimum of 4 years and at least 2 crisis to overcome before it's legit.
idk, it is like people saying they couldn't love a child who wasn't their biological off spring.
Maybe those rocks are insanely happy :)
Nicely said Wherefore
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 389
Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/16/2016 6:58:37 AM
If a couple does the together forever, but separate homes bit, would that also apply when they're old ad feeble and in a nursing home? Would they want to be in separate nursing homes to make sure they don't get on each others nerves?
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 390
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Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/16/2016 7:15:17 AM
Anyone into rock tumbling??

It doesn't matter how old you are or how many batches of rock you have tumbled in the past - the reward is there every time!!!

There are three important rules that to follow in all aspects of rock tumbling. These are:

1) "Garbage in means garbage out";
2) "Avoid contamination";
3) "Great results take time."

Also, tumbling works best when all of the rocks have similar things in common, and are about the same hardness. I have tumbled up to 20 rocks at the same time!

Rock tumbling, don't knock if you haven't tried it.
 scorpioinOregon
Joined: 7/20/2014
Msg: 391
Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/16/2016 10:49:29 PM
I've only been seeing this guy for a month, but it's working out great. He lives 65 miles away so he comes for a couple days and goes back home. We usually wait a couple days and then I go to his house for a couple of days. We have talked about trips we want to take where we would be together for a week or two at a time.

so far it's working out great. I don't know if it's forever but it's working right now.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 392
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Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/17/2016 9:36:51 AM
A month, and during this month it's been 4 days a week staying at each others' place? That's Quick. I can see since it's only been a month, that Quickness is somewhat offset by knowledge of the distance. But if you're like that with only a month in going off to the races like that ("No, you're schmoopy; No, You're schmoopy") -- I would guess it's not going to be too terribly long after the honeymoon phase before the distance is going to be a significant hassle.
 Fabreezey
Joined: 1/4/2014
Msg: 393
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Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/17/2016 11:55:07 AM

We all have opinions, of course… and when identified as such, they can provide alternative insights, advice, and even amusement (the only reason I bother with these forums, lately)… but yow—it’s amazing to me that so many people are sooooo certain they know what’s right for everyone else.

I couldn’t agree more. When I was a newbie at dating and lacking in confidence I used to read some of the stuff on these forums and come away feeling more uncertain than ever before although there are a lot of wise posts given by people who don’t have any agenda other than to share their experience in the hope it might help others and then there are the “experts” whose opinions we should take as gospel. You know sometimes I’m not sure if it’s us they’re trying to convince or themselves! ;)


so far it's working out great. I don't know if it's forever but it's working right now.

That’s great. Far too many people focus on the future at the expense of enjoying the present as shown in the quote below.


If a couple does the together forever, but separate homes bit, would that also apply when they're old ad feeble and in a nursing home? Would they want to be in separate nursing homes to make sure they don't get on each others nerves?


Who knows? Some people might want to be partnered up and living together as a way of filling the void within themselves or because they’re afraid of impending age and/or ill health and perhaps some people don’t want to be partnered up and living together because they’re fearful of history repeating itself, of losing out financially, of losing their independence, of losing the romance and a myriad other reasons... some people are even scared of what they might gain... if only they gave themselves half a chance. They’re more likely to be scared if they had together forever and it fell apart. There’s plenty of room for ‘you’, ‘me’ and ‘us’ in living apart but in together forever (as the name implies) there’s only room for ‘us’ and after 20 years and there’s no “me” left! Perhaps it’s easier to maintain your separateness whilst living apart but it doesn’t mean you are any less committed to your partner or the relationship. Personally speaking, my partner and I are both open to the idea of living together.... one day.
In the meantime I look forward to more people advising on what constitutes a proper relationship with a capital “R”.
 Fabreezey
Joined: 1/4/2014
Msg: 394
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Posted: 8/18/2016 6:46:29 AM

There will never be total trust in that type of relationship
I think pre-nups are a good thing. I wouldn't get into a relationship without some sort of agreement like a pre-nup if I was in the position
No matter how much people fantasize about love and marriage, the bottom line is it boils down to money. Love costs money.


You seem to have a few trust issues going on. May be I’m naive but I see a pre-nup as way of having sex with someone you don’t really trust. I could never consider having a live in relationship with my partner if he made money the prime motivator. That way of thinking creates emotional distance from the start. When you make material possessions and finance the top of your agenda it smacks of insecurity. Being bitter about dating someone who doesn’t wish to give up their living independently doesn’t address the situation. I earn more money than my partner but my outgoings are higher. Money isn’t an issue and never has been from the start. Even though my trust has been been broken many times, I implicitly trust this man with my life and it’s liberating to feel this way.


I can see someone, notably at an older age Expecting just that and being content – OK


Yes, I agree that a LAT relationship suits people of an older age like me. Of course being content is one thing but many people confuse the word ‘content’ with ‘settling’. Feeling that you have settled for something doesn’t bring about contentment. Accepting the situation makes more sense for peace of mind, especially if everything else about your relationship is great. Being accepting can also bring about a shift in one of you, especially if they’re still at the stage of contemplating a live in arrangement. Sometimes, we can’t always be on the same page at the same time in relationships and pushing things might only slow the process down even further. Logically speaking, there could be practical reasons why living together might be difficult but also at an emotional level it’s helpful to be aware of the obstacles we ourselves might put in the way.


Also, I have SOLE possession of the remote, and can choose whether or not I want to actually SPEAK to anybody at the end of my day/week, as more often than not, people are the LAST thing that I want to deal with when I come home, which is also why I rarely answer my phone, either....


I hear you sister!!... although the post below seems to speak louder and louder to me:-


I like sleeping with a woman, the warmth of skin on skin, the reassurance of another person's presence. the smell; it was something I missed dearly in the later half of marriage - even though we shared a bed there was a large uncrossable gulf between us.
As for marriage being no guarantee about the support from the other, I would like to think that as I've aged I also matured and gained a little wisdom in partner picking. Even though I married relatively late (for the time) we kind of rushed in to the marriage after having been separated for several years. I know I overlooked things I would be very cognizant of now - of course, I also readily admit I fear being too sensitive to stuff that should only be a speed bump, not a barricade.
Contrary to the cited poster, I like cooking for two (or more), eating together, even watching TV or a movie together; laundry was never an issue, I've gotta clean anyway (although there is nothing wrong with two sharing this chore), and I do windows!
Finally, I can think of nothing more depressing than returning day after day, to an empty house - no one to talk to, no one to share with, no one to provide additional atmosphere to an otherwise dreary existence.
Do I NEED someone else in my life? No (well maybe a little); but I do want my life to be shared with a loving caring sharing lover



Living together you are more content and secure, but living apart can be more exciting when you get together. You look forward with more anticipation.
One can debate how strong are the bonds in various types of relationships, while those bonds are much stronger and harder to break when you are married, nonetheless the strength of any relationship depends both on the type of relationship and on the people involved So a LAT can be a much stronger relationship than a marriage, depending on how the people involved behave.

The general definition of relationship is the way two people or organizations relate to each other


Nicely said!
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 395
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Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/18/2016 10:38:49 AM
WhereforeAndWhyNot :

those who are so sure they know exactly what is or is not a “real” relationship… and what therefore MUST be what is right for everyone in the world

people are sooooo certain they know what’s right for everyone else

who really thinks they know what, in terms of personal relationships, is “right” for all people is just intentionally myopic—like the proverbial stubborn ostrich seeing only the sand around its head

That's what the real problem is - continuing to equate defining 'relationship' with judging what is right for everyone. That's been debunked a dozen times or more so far on this topic, yet it keeps getting thrown out there. Why...I don't know.
 scorpioinOregon
Joined: 7/20/2014
Msg: 396
Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/20/2016 11:10:47 AM

A month, and during this month it's been 4 days a week staying at each others' place? That's Quick.


I don't know why I feel like I even have to answer this, but I will cause I am bored. After driving 65 miles back and forth the first week, it got old. We met, had lunch, talked until they really needed the table and were giving us evil eyes, then took a long walk on the beach and talked some more. We had met half way, but it's an itty bitty town. We found a place with a picnic table and sat there and talked until we both decided we didn't want to drive in the dark. We almost the same thing the next day. The next day he came to my town and we hung out, and did a bunch of tourist town stuff, and he drove home early enough so he didn't have to drive on the curvy dangerous road in the dark. The next day, I went to his town which is even smaller than my town. I met some of his friends, we took long walks, watched a movie and I went home. So you see, even though we haven't known each other very long, we spent a lot of time enjoyable time getting to know each other every day since the day we met. We decided we wanted to keep seeing each other and work around the amount of driving we would be doing.

If it were 65 miles on a freeway, it would be easier. It's 2 lane curvy highway with a lot of big log trucks, motor homes, and people traveling with 4 wheelers with not many passing lanes.
 scotishlasse
Joined: 8/25/2014
Msg: 397
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Together forever, no marriage, separate homes
Posted: 8/28/2016 10:16:18 AM
Yes Bluemoon, I agree, I keep reading these posts looking for more options, but I suppose it all depends on who you meet and fall in love with doesn't it? I know who I am, and I am someone who falls deeply and I wake up and go to sleep wanting someone next to me, not sharing a day or so, but a life. After buying my house, I have tried this formula, trying to live apart and unfortunately it didn't work like that. Now he's gone and wish I had given him the answer he was looking for; we all live and learn don't we.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 398
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Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/29/2016 8:58:14 AM

If it were 65 miles on a freeway, it would be easier. It's 2 lane curvy highway with a lot of big log trucks, motor homes, and people traveling with 4 wheelers with not many passing lanes.

Yeah, but again -- that's Quick. Quickness will many times happen out of convenience or avoiding inconveniences I guess... but meshing like that so swiftly is pretty Bold. But hey, living in small towns, IMO, amps up the chances of swifter bolder moves working out in the end.
 BeckyHT
Joined: 1/1/2013
Msg: 399
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Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/29/2016 11:18:47 AM

Yeah, but again -- that's Quick. Quickness will many times happen out of convenience or avoiding inconveniences I guess... but meshing like that so swiftly is pretty Bold. But hey, living in small towns, IMO, amps up the chances of swifter bolder moves working out in the end.

Norwegian, you're 36. Oregon is 63. There's quite a few world experiences in between your ages. I don't see the 'bold'. I see two people with many more years of 'living and learning', and perhaps families grown up, and now they're just looking for a companionship that will work for both. They're looking for the most convenient way to do this. If it continues, it's because both know there are not many fish left in the pond, and so then they have to make an effort.

My BF and I have been driving 50 miles each way on curvy highways for 3 years... and it is working so far. Yes, the distance gets tiring, but the alternative of putting a stop to the new life experiences and memories we're making, is not a choice we want to make.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 400
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Together forever, separate rocks
Posted: 8/29/2016 2:33:10 PM

I don't see the 'bold'. ...... My BF and I have been driving 50 miles each way on curvy highways for 3 years... and it is working so far.

I wasn't referring that as so much the bold. I can understand wanting to spending multiple nights right off the bat due to all that. My point was, regardless of that, it's still pretty quick (ie bold) to jump into things that swiftly. Regardless of age, some people are just looking for companionship too. Not everyone's baby-hunting or remotely close to it. I can understand more about compatibility as years go on experiencing the single life, although I will say for many years I would have to give basic common-sense advice to those much older than myself when they were fresh off divorce flying blind into the dating scene -- so I don't think age alone is trump card.

All I'm saying is that is Quick, regardless of age. "...he comes for a couple days and goes back home. We usually wait a couple days and then I go to his house for a couple of days," right after (I'm assuming) the first couple dates or so -- is pretty speedy. I'm not bashing it -- just going "Oh, wow, that's ballsy if they weren't someone you've known as a friend for a while, but right from online. Hmmm."
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