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 AUTHOR
 CuriousInDB
Joined: 7/12/2014
Msg: 26
Feedback please .Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
I like it, Richard.

You have 8 slots for pics. I'd like to see some good pics here. I'd keep ... I was going to say the three you have, but I'm convinced if you got out there and shot ... what? Shoot 20, 30, whatever, you'll have 8 pics better than any you have here.

Good luck. It's a good profile. Get the pics up, Richard.
 sigrich
Joined: 1/20/2015
Msg: 27
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/29/2015 2:21:10 PM
Thanks. I was planning to try an do that this weekend :)
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 28
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/29/2015 2:37:57 PM
Richard
Some of the sentences are too choppy and could be ONE sentence instead of three words period four words. period
But it is a good read.. you are crazy handsome so get up all the pictures ASAP.
Are you msging women? Remember to keep it short and simple, don't bomb her with Qs.
No need to say no children in the text - already states that in your Stats
I think you are going to do great my friend :)
 sigrich
Joined: 1/20/2015
Msg: 29
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/29/2015 8:15:08 PM
Thank you for the kind words. It's very encouraging. I am messaging and get noda! I've tried everything I can think of. I've tried a complement of the profile with maybe a question, say a little about me and I always keep it very brief. I NEVER complement looks on a profile or am I suggestive in anyway.

I've never been good with grammar or math. They have both been my nemesis. I suppose that's why I became a drummer and a computer tech.

It's funny that I can do public speaking so well. I always get complements on how well I speak. Part of the problem on POF I believe comes down to the structure of how I come off in writing and the pictures. We only have these words to go on. If my sentences are choppy it could be some one thinks I'm a flake in real life. I get that. I've read some on here that are as bad as mine, but I pay no attention because I think it's an unfair judgment of someone's character. It comes down to common interest and attraction. That's just for me. I try my best to use this as I would in person. It's the only way I feel it's genuine.
 call_me_tater
Joined: 12/30/2014
Msg: 30
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/29/2015 8:44:02 PM
Have you tried to write the way you speak?
Mentally have a conversation with the woman and write it down.
Or record as you talk about yourself.
Couldn't hurt to try.

Looking forward to new pics.
I'd like to see some with your head angled in a natural way.
Smile, smirk, show your teeth.
Take a whole bunch in different poses, different clothes, different places.
Reach inside and channel your inner teen.
You can google how to take a good selfie.
 sigrich
Joined: 1/20/2015
Msg: 31
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/29/2015 9:10:26 PM
I've been doing that in the forums. It's more free form. Profiles seem like a lot more pressure than it's worth. I have made a profile like that before, but I did not have to much luck. It could have very been the pictures. I try not be a free form on profiles. It seems like everything is judge so much that if the profile is not perfect it will get passed over. I also don't want to come off as fake. I thought a happy medium would be a little serious and a little fun. Maybe I should just do bullet points :D

Likes:
Running and coffee

Dislikes:
BS and drugs

sadly, this would probably work ... kidddddddding
 call_me_tater
Joined: 12/30/2014
Msg: 32
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/29/2015 10:01:10 PM
Eek.
No bullet points or lists.

Yes, it was most likely the pics.
Can't stress enough how important they are.
I used to rotate my pics (had 7) as the main and found that certain pics got lots of attention and others got me nothing.

A casual style of writing always does better than formal, factual, resume style.
It's friendlier.
You want to be approachable and likeable.

Delete the age restrictions. Doubt you will be flooded by mail from >41 yr olds.
They're useful for women to cut down on messages since we get a lot daily.
Restrictions have opposite effect on women...many don't respond b/c of them.

Delete the "must have a picture".
There is a large number of women who hide their pics because of the mail they get.
Most of them are very attractive and fit.
 GreenThumbz18
Joined: 4/25/2012
Msg: 33
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/30/2015 12:53:33 AM
"There is a large number of women who hide their pics because of the mail they get.
Most of them are very attractive and fit."
Wow, I'd love to see the documentation of that claim !!
 call_me_tater
Joined: 12/30/2014
Msg: 34
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/30/2015 3:12:51 AM

women who hide their pics
I have 3 male friends on here.
It is a common occurrence for them to get initial messages with photos attached from women hiding pics. They say it is also the experience of their friend doing OLD.
 sigrich
Joined: 1/20/2015
Msg: 35
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/30/2015 7:54:32 AM
I was kidding about bullet points. I think, I'm pretty happy with my written part with half serious and a little fun in there. I think that's how I come off. My personality is a little bit more sarcastic, humorous and laid back in my day to day life. It's hard for me to bring that writing.

No age restriction? Wouldn't that make me come off as creepy? I'll try it though. I've now heard both. Have an age restriction and not.
I'm going to disagree with the picture part. I want to see who is messaging me before I reply. Most women seem to feel the same. Am I wrong?

I know women have it much tougher on here. Your inbox is probably filled with 100-200 a day and they all say the same thing. You have to weed out the weirdo's and creeps. Seems like that means if everything on the profile is not perfect, you'll get trashed before given a chance.

All of this feedback has been great. I always like a woman's point of view on this.
 CuriousInDB
Joined: 7/12/2014
Msg: 36
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/30/2015 10:07:55 AM

No age restriction? Wouldn't that make me come off as creepy?


No. Age restrictions, any mail restrictions, restrict. Most of us here have no restrictions.

No worries about going too far off the creepometer because the site's owner has that handled with this post in forums 5/19/2013 under "Message Restrictions":


if you are are looking for women the youngest you can search for is your age -14 this rule is only in effect if you search for women under 35. Women 18 to 21 can only be contacted by men under 30. (not fully implemented yet)

Women who are 18 come to the site to find people to date, they don't come here to find "friends" with men in their 50's. Over all for young women its just a horrible user experience as for some of them over half their messages are from men double their age. This change only effects 1.7% of first contacts between users on the site but it will make a huge difference in terms of female perception of the site.


It doesn't seem to be a very popular decision. It's a 31 page thread right now. You decide. :))
 GreenThumbz18
Joined: 4/25/2012
Msg: 37
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/30/2015 12:51:48 PM
"Seems like that means if everything on the profile is not perfect, you'll get trashed before given a chance." If you're a man that's a good jist of what online dating is about. The trick is to be friendly and non-threatening, both in images and words.
There was a girl in my area, maybe early 20's, very pretty, and she had a screenshot of her POF inbox on her profile. It read "You have 1,700 + messages !!!!!" How would you like to deal with that ? ? ?
 sigrich
Joined: 1/20/2015
Msg: 38
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/30/2015 2:48:48 PM
Took the age restrictions off. I did not want to send the wrong message, hence the restriction. I'll get this on the right track eventually :)

I've tried all approaches to sending the first message. Which were genuine, short, and not creepy, but after being here for a bit and not getting hardly any views, messages, or message returns, it's a little disappointing. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong or if I'm doing anything wrong. I know I have a lot to offer and I'm a fun guy to hang around, but I'm getting passed over for superficial reasons makes me wonder if this is all worth the effort or not.
 GreenThumbz18
Joined: 4/25/2012
Msg: 39
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/30/2015 3:09:37 PM
"I have a lot to offer and I'm a fun guy to hang around, "
I believe you, but the trick of online dating is to communicate that message using only these photos and only these words, without getting so frustrated that you become bitter and angry. It's not as easy as it seems, but it does work.
By contrast I was in a supermarket an hour ago and chatting up an attractive woman who was buying a huge amount of food( she is a dorm mother for 18 college girls- nice job!) and we were laughing and the cashier lady started laughing too and after a few minutes the cashier told me she gets off at 6. What's that about? I wasn't even trying, but I think I'm gonna go back to that market !
If you can joke and flirt online you can do it anywhere, and it's not a bad idea to practice.
The absolute best advice I could give you is make them laugh, be friendly and entertaining. Those qualities trump almost everything else. "Fun" people are magnetic.
 sigrich
Joined: 1/20/2015
Msg: 40
Feedback please .
Posted: 1/31/2015 2:01:14 PM
Ahhh hence the problem. My day to day life I can talk to anyone and be flirty. When it comes to pictures or text it's a totally different game. I feel completely stuck and I'm sure it shows. I'll find a way to get past it. Some times this seems like more trouble than it's worth, but I'm learning. I'll keep an open mind about all of this. I know it won't happen overnight, but I would like to think something would change by now ;)
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