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 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 51
smoker who lied on profile Page 3 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

I´m a Lawyer.


But I admit to lying on my profile.


Sounds "par for the course" to me.


But I lie because when I said I was a Lawyer I only got messages from people asking me for a job, or for a free consultation.


Did you actually have the words "lawyer" or "attorney" listed?
I have seen women list "lawyer" and "attorney", but I have also seen some women simply list the word "legal" under occupation, which could be lawyer, or legal aide, or law clerk, or paralegal, or even legal secretary. "Legal" can cover lawyer without lying, and without using the word "lawyer" or "attorney" specifically.
 SunshineGirl__
Joined: 10/7/2014
Msg: 52
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/28/2015 5:33:22 PM
^^^^^^ Kinda seems logical.

The attorneys I know and in my area will provide a free initial consultation to determine if whatever the issue is is worthwhile to both parties. I’d be pissed as heck if I had to pay an attorney just to tell me I have no case/legal standing. :/

I’m curious…how many job applicants did you receive in nine days?
 ClooneysTutor
Joined: 3/30/2014
Msg: 53
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/28/2015 5:44:13 PM
I had plastic surgeon listed as my profession for 1 day as a joke.

You would not believe the messages I received.

I need to honestly learn that profession, damn...

I don't joke on my profile anymore.
 ClooneysTutor
Joined: 3/30/2014
Msg: 54
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/28/2015 5:45:38 PM
Can't edit posts. Bummer.

Imagine all those free consultations I could offer as a plastic surgeon?
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 55
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/28/2015 6:00:19 PM
wanderlight- Maybe just list "legal".
It's interesting that NO one has addressed the scenario I presented-------What about when a non smoker KNOWINGLY responds to a smoker who is honest and then pesters them to quit after the fact? That's not ok either.
(my question is not specifically directed at you, just a general observation)
 norwegianguy123
Joined: 10/27/2014
Msg: 56
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/28/2015 7:12:54 PM

Consultations charged a 70€ payable via Paypal. And no, I don´t have any openings. <<<<< Maybe I should just be honest and add this to my profile?

WHAT? Lawyers lie and get mad when others do??? No way! ;) Naw, don't be honest. You want them to see the real you, right? Oh wait, we have a contradiction here! I'm just playin'....

But you bring up a good point, which is why people do lie. We run into our own experiences of people making false/hasty judgements (like you may have an opening)... or other things not to get hit on or not to be passed over for stupid reasons. It's OK for us to do it, but not okay for others, when we rationalize it.
 BLonde^j^AngeL
Joined: 1/2/2015
Msg: 57
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/28/2015 7:36:55 PM

the penis size

flaccid or erect? ;0P
 BlasphemousBombshell
Joined: 11/19/2013
Msg: 58
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/28/2015 8:11:28 PM
Lying is not okay, ever, in my book.

Too many times in my life I excused white lies only to uncover they were the tip of the iceburg.

Lies, even for minor stuff, is proof positive that the person can and will deceive and manipulate to get their way, that honor doesn't mean more than their selfish means to an end
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 59
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/29/2015 7:19:29 AM

It's interesting that NO one has addressed the scenario I presented-------What about when a non smoker KNOWINGLY responds to a smoker who is honest and then pesters them to quit after the fact? That's not ok either.
(my question is not specifically directed at you, just a general observation)


I didn't respond because I wouldn't knowingly contact a smoker.
I'm not sure many who are anti-smoking would?
But if they did, I agree...not ok.
Kind of like contacting someone who's not religious and you are and then
trying to change their mind.
It's tough enough without looking for things to find fault with.
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 60
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/29/2015 4:16:48 PM
Browneyesboo- Thank you for saying it.
I guess I have a bit of a chip on my shoulders because of the way SOME non smokers respond to people who admit that they smoke on these forums.
I swear I thought SOME people were coming for me with pitchforks and fire in a different thread when I admitted I smoke.
I get it, it's a bad habit, it's bad for you, I wish I had never started.
I totally get why some non smokers don't want to date smokers.
I don't judge them for that.
I don't expect people to treat me with kid gloves, but GEEZE some of the vile directed at smokers is just uncalled for.
My ex KNEW I smoked when we met, I told him from the beginning. He never said a WORD when we were dating, or when we were engaged, then after we got married, at least once a week he asked me to quit.
The "I love you, now change" mindset doesn't work out well, when it comes to smoking or other things.
That was my point.
I understand how the OP felt, her date should have been honest and told her he smoked.
I just don't understand why people lie before a meet.
Well, I know why, but you would think people would learn, eventually.
They want to get the date and then they think they can hide it or the person will develop feelings for them and/or overlook it.
Dirty play, just not fair.
I'm pretty much an open book when it comes to my pluses and minuses.
A lasting relationship is never guaranteed, but one way to doom it is to lie, especially from the beginning.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 61
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History
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/29/2015 4:34:01 PM
I have "lion tamer" listed as my profession on my profile....lol
It was a facetious response that was partly also because I'm NOT really interested in being with someone who is judging me based on what I do for a living....
I don't identify myself by my job, and don't want to be with someone who does either....
It's usually one of the first questions that a guy asks about and I tell them immediately that I work as a caregiver...

All other pertinent questions, ie. height, body type, smoking, drinking, kids, etc. are ALL true....

I'm an open book when I'm trying to get to know someone, (unless of course he asks invasive and inappropriate questions on the first date!LOL), and as I mentioned earlier here, I would HATE to meet a man that I think I may be interested in and see the look of disappointment on his face when the truth comes out...
 happygal_28
Joined: 9/25/2005
Msg: 62
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History
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/30/2015 6:33:18 PM
Saw a supposed match tonight whose first line admitted he was 60(when my limits stated 49-51). Too bad for the duplicity -instant turn off... for how many potential dates o
ther than myself?

That said, I got "conned" by a smoker who thought he was a quitter (LOL) - turned out to be a great relationship. In my mind the moral is "pick your battles". Smokers may be trying to be non-smokers but 60 will NEVER be 49-51.
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 63
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/30/2015 7:17:44 PM

happygal_28:
Saw a supposed match tonight whose first line admitted he was 60(when my limits stated 49-51). Too bad for the duplicity -instant turn off... for how many potential dates o
ther than myself?

That said, I got "conned" by a smoker who thought he was a quitter (LOL) - turned out to be a great relationship. In my mind the moral is "pick your battles". Smokers may be trying to be non-smokers but 60 will NEVER be 49-51.


You claim to have found Your Fishy, why would You even bother looking at anyone POF Matched You with? If You're here only for the Forums, why Look?
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 64
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/30/2015 7:35:18 PM

If You're here only for the Forums, why Look?


For the same reason married men still look at other women. I say there's no harm in looking as long as one doesn't touch.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 65
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/31/2015 4:41:56 AM

I have been going out with this man for four weeks and just discovered that he is a smoker (smelled it on him) and that he lied about his age by 2 years (he mentioned what year he was born in) on his profile


It took you FOUR weeks to uncover this bit of information????? While you DATED him?????

As a non smoker, I would think picking up on the fact someone else is a smoker wouldn't be that hard. Especially if you were dating. Unless of course those dates involved you two sitting about 300 yards apart from each other.

If you can't "accept" what a person does, or doesn't do, then I would think they are not one of those people you wanna hang around with. No matter how much you like them.

Kick him to the curb.

For whatever reasons you want.

Part of the bonus of being an "adult".
 Qura
Joined: 8/5/2014
Msg: 66
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History
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 1/31/2015 4:21:13 PM
I'm surprised by how many people will put up with lying. Sure, there are gray areas and the way a person sees themselves (what the heck is "a few pounds," anyway?) may differ from how others see them. But flat out lying--to get what you want--is, to me, a total turn off.

I could't date a smoker b/c it would be all too easy for me to slip back into the habit, and I simply won't take that chance.

As for the age thing, pfffffftttttt. "Wanting" to stay in a certain age group for searches is no excuse. That are intentionally misleading other people to get what one wants. I don't particularly care about the difference between 59 and 61, but I do care that someone lied, and I do have a right to narrow my search as I see fit.
 Ainen
Joined: 6/27/2013
Msg: 67
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 2/1/2015 6:59:27 AM

I refuse to be around a smoker.


IIRC in a previous incarnation on this site, you complained about someone you saw multiple times because he and his clothes smelled of smoke: he lived in a cabin in the country with a wood stove, and he SMOKED. You (or the character you portray in your oft-repeated stories on the forums) have a history of going out with people you claim you refuse to date. For these stories to have any consistency, you would have lower standards back when you dated the dealbreaker people, for example you used to date smokers, but not anymore.

Regarding another thread about people contacting people who are not a match based on their profiles, one reason people contact "incompatible" people is the common situation of people going out with the "incompatibles", not being honest when they claim something is a dealbreaker.


Smoking is a definite dealbreaker for me. This site has a setting "would you date a smoker?" to which I answer no. I would also not be willing to spend time in her car or home if she lets other people smoke there. As LH has posted, third hand smoke is dangerous to non-smokers.

Not sure why a smoker would claim they don't smoke. Smokers seem more popular (at least where I live, lowest cigarette tax in the USA and one of the highest rates of smokers). Smokers bond with each other. A smoker who claims they don't smoke might prevent many fellow smokers from contacting them.

Lying on a profile is a dealbreaker. Lying about age (aside from a few days on your birthdate to decrease the chance of identity theft) is a dealbreaker. If they lie about one thing, they might be lying about others.

The most common inaccurate setting I've encountered with girls I've met from POF is "I do not drink". Body type is subjective, but many "average" or "athletic" people of both genders would be more realistic to put a few extra. Sometimes they put interests they don't and won't currently do.
 Ainen
Joined: 6/27/2013
Msg: 68
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 2/1/2015 7:07:46 AM

I guess I have a bit of a chip on my shoulders because of the way SOME non smokers respond to people who admit that they smoke on these forums.
I swear I thought SOME people were coming for me with pitchforks and fire in a different thread when I admitted I smoke.


I agree it's bad for a non smoker to knowingly contact a smoker, then try to get them to quit. That's like the Bible thumpers who contact non religious people and try to convert them. But I believe substance abusers (cigarettes, alcohol, narcotics) are much more likely to try to recruit non-abusers than the non-abusers are likely to try to get abusers to quit. Countless smokers, druggies and alcoholics have tried to recruit me.

As to the "pitchforks", you're the one who said about some nonsmokers, "They don't matter". Not sure if you were including me among the people who "don't matter". You also accused me of personally attacking you when everything I said was general to all smokers, all nurses who smoke outside hospital entrances, all smokers who smoke around non smokers, etc. If you tell a non-smoking nurse they shouldn't be allowed to be a nurse, don't be surprised if they react negatively.
 activemelaney
Joined: 9/8/2012
Msg: 69
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History
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 2/1/2015 10:07:40 AM
^^^
A smoking nurse would last 10 seconds on my ward. I simply do not accept staff who do not set an example of a healthy lifestyle. They will not be hired.

I have between 21 and 26 staff at any time and the are non smokers, clean, and relatively fit. We pride ourselves on having a reputation for exercising, doing activities together, etc. it boosts morale .
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 70
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 2/1/2015 10:14:28 AM

A smoking nurse would last 10 seconds on my ward. I simply do not accept staff who do not set an example of a healthy lifestyle. They will not be hired.


Funny shiat. If you were actually a nurse and in the field you would KNOW that your field is full of substance abusers. It's almost a perquisite to deal with amount of shiat you have to deal with on a daily basis.
 Cycling99
Joined: 12/14/2014
Msg: 71
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 2/1/2015 10:19:04 AM
If it is a deal breaker for you, it should be over the moment you find out.
 norwegianguy123
Joined: 10/27/2014
Msg: 72
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 2/1/2015 10:40:43 AM

For the same reason married men still look at other women. I say there's no harm in looking as long as one doesn't touch.

Whoah! Seriously? On a DATING site? I can understand being at a bar, wearing a ring, and sure, flirting if/when that happens and people had some drinks, etc. Nobody's leading anyone on, the ring's there, etc. As long as the flirting (which is a relative term) is within certain boundaries and all -- sure.

But a Dating site -- that's just leading people on, if you're there to look but not touch, unless specified right on the front page (profile).

It took you FOUR weeks to uncover this bit of information????? While you DATED him?????

He obviously wasn't an avid smoker. When people are quitting, it's not that hard to go the better part of an evening Not smoking at all. In fact, he very well may NOT have been a smokER, which yes, would be surprising if it took 4 weeks -- but he had a once-in-a-while cigarette. I have friends who do that -- almost like someone smoking a joint every once in a while, but instead a regular cig. Unlike an actual smokER, it's not going to be picked up too easily. If it takes 4 weeks to find out that they will smoke a cigarette, that just implies that it's someone who will put their hand in the cookie jar on occasion, as opposed to someone being the fat kid who's like cookie monster. :)

I agree it's bad for a non smoker to knowingly contact a smoker, then try to get them to quit.

I think if a guy is a smoker, and he runs into a real Hottie, and he always thought to himself he should quit sometime soon, he probably will give it a go (Chantix). If said hottie is acting like a mom -- treating it like he does crack, and just nagging, etc -- no, not good.

Countless smokers, druggies and alcoholics have tried to recruit me.

Pretty general theyre-all-the-same-thing. What makes someone an alky? To some, if you have any amount of drinks, if more often than just special occasions, you're an alky -- they see it as the Devil's Brew. Same with others about smoking, but worse... if they see someone they know who seemingly never smoked, light up a cigarette, they'll screech and point -- as seen in Invasion of the Body Snatchers. :)
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 73
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 2/1/2015 2:26:31 PM

Ainen:
But I believe substance abusers (cigarettes, alcohol, narcotics) are much more likely to try to recruit non-abusers than the non-abusers are likely to try to get abusers to quit. Countless smokers, druggies and alcoholics have tried to recruit me.


OMG, Now the Smokers, Drinkers & Druggies are trying to Recruit the non-users into their Deviant Lifestyles.... I know, "Just because You're Paranoid, doesn't mean someone isn't out to get You".... But come on, it's not they don't see their habit is a Red Flag to You, but they're out to Recruit You to their Deviant Lifestyle......

Maybe You should wear a Hat when Outside, I think the Sun has gotten to You........
 forumfellathesequel
Joined: 7/28/2014
Msg: 74
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 2/1/2015 2:59:08 PM
Yes smoking is a major ick factor..one of my recent meets waited till we met in person too indulge me in the fact..she was actually 51 and not 49 as her profile said, and that she had just quit smoking a few days before the meet, even though her profile said non smoker...waste of time and gas money...again
 bluemoon24_7
Joined: 4/18/2014
Msg: 75
smoker who lied on profile
Posted: 2/1/2015 3:01:19 PM
So when someone says "would you like a beer" and I say, no thanks. Or if they ask "you want a toke." And I say no thanks. They were trying to recruit me?? OMFG. And here I thought people were asking if I wanted to share or partake. Being an adult, I just thought....nice of them to ask but not my thing. Next time I'll just smack those recruiting fanatics or call the police...we don't need this type of recruiters out and about walking free.
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