Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Bad sex vs no sex      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 97
Bad sex vs no sexPage 5 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

I meant women that don't bother seeking out a man because they rely on or prefer toys.

I'd actually agree with you - if a toy could mow the lawn and change the oil in my car, it would be win/win.
 Never_in_Life
Joined: 1/13/2015
Msg: 98
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 3/14/2015 6:16:32 AM

Ive never had bad sex. Admittedly Im easy to please but I cant remember having bad sex. Only thing that would make it bad is if I didnt like him in which case no sex wins every time.


And also, maybe the men you were with were genuinely happy to be with you as you were with them. That kind of thing tends to feed off itself, so cool on you - you inspired sexual joy from the men you were with.
 carleyrenee1
Joined: 12/13/2014
Msg: 99
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 3/14/2015 12:17:12 PM
some of these young guys are clueless. they leave you high and dry. selfish!
 Livingsaint
Joined: 8/14/2013
Msg: 100
view profile
History
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 3/20/2015 3:13:49 PM
What happened to the 3rd option of EDUCATING them?

Surely a sex based relationship is all about sex and what gets each other off? Communication is as important in that kind of relationship as in any other, and has obvious & vital benefits too!
How somebody kisses is a HUGE thing for me, and it could make or break the whole sex session. If they kiss like an epileptic guppy fish for eg, I will grab them by the chin and explain in great detail how to do it much better.lol

May sound a bit control-freakish, but I have done my little bit for all their sex partners after me (Praise me!YAY!).
No point moaning about so & so not being a mindreader and not instinctively knowing that if they did (fill blank here) you'd pop like a cracker at a Chinese wedding!
C'mon! You don't have to be a sex guru to 'make bad' sex into 'better sex'! Lets help each other out!lol
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 101
view profile
History
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 3/20/2015 8:43:36 PM

What happened to the 3rd option of EDUCATING them?


All well and good.....if they are actually willing to listen and learn....
 Tarnished_Knight
Joined: 3/5/2009
Msg: 102
view profile
History
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 3/20/2015 9:29:14 PM

All well and good.....if they are actually willing to listen and learn....


Ms. Micki, once again I find the two of us in complete, total, and utter agreement. I'm starting to like you.

It's that element of listening to and learning, or even trying to learn, that is so important. Making the effort. Talking with vs. talking to.

Look forward to more sage words.

TK
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 103
view profile
History
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 3/21/2015 9:50:02 AM
aww thanks TK....sure took ya' long enough! LOL

Isn't half the fun of "good sex" the getting to know what makes your partner squirm part?
Sure is for me!
 Tarnished_Knight
Joined: 3/5/2009
Msg: 104
view profile
History
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 3/21/2015 12:07:32 PM
squirming's good.

My experience (and here I admit to a limited sample size) is that some folk (I suppose men and women) are too self conscious, can't/won't relax, bring too many 3rd parties (in their head) to bed, etc. For those of us who have, say, Christian beliefs that govern activities outside of marriage, being able to let those strictures go within the confines of the new paradigm, i.e., marriage.

Back to the squirming: I miss it very much - having all one's senses as attuned as possible to the sensations of your partner, is ecstasy in and of itself.

TK
[not so ecstatic at the moment]
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 105
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/2/2015 6:43:22 AM

For those of us who have, say, Christian beliefs that govern activities outside of marriage, being able to let those strictures go within the confines of the new paradigm, i.e., marriage.


So what Christian beliefs are interfering with you?
 coderedjulia
Joined: 11/15/2013
Msg: 106
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/8/2015 11:37:03 PM
There's more to a relationship than just sex. And there are always ways to improve the sex life between partners. If you truly care for that person then do what you can to make it better. If not, then move on
 POF_and_Destiny
Joined: 3/13/2015
Msg: 107
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/10/2015 11:20:41 AM
This reminds me of the saying "If I did not have bad luck, I would have no luck at all".

For those of us existing on no sex, bad sex would still be good!
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 108
view profile
History
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/11/2015 9:48:46 PM
^^^^^Not really.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 109
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/15/2015 11:13:40 AM

For those of us existing on no sex, bad sex would still be good!


Or.... you can teach her. If she is willing, anything is possible.
 norwegianguy123
Joined: 10/27/2014
Msg: 110
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/21/2015 6:34:09 PM

Or.... you can teach her. If she is willing, anything is possible.

Well, sometimes bad sexual experiences are because of their look (and feel). Ya can't teach many people to go from being a 2/10 to a 6+ in looks. So why would said guy sleep with a 2 in the first place? With the power of beer goggles + said lady's clothes giving the false impression of a firmer, non-overly-droopy body -- if he drinks too much, he can find himself in said situations!

But aside from those natural disasters that would make one's sexual experience not-so-pleasant (unless starved for a long time).... from my experience, if a gal is "not good in bed", it's not really due to her "lacking info"... but more not Wanting to do x/y/z and/or move like x/y/z, etc -- and it'd require developing a relationship for a good while to sway her Preferences, showing her the ropes and convincing her it's all good and in her comfort zone, etc. Even then, it's no guarantee though.
 Axis555
Joined: 3/29/2015
Msg: 111
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/22/2015 4:01:38 AM
What defines 'bad sex'?

I'm enjoying not having sex, bad or otherwise. I could have if I wanted but just not really interested.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 112
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/22/2015 7:18:08 AM

Ya can't teach many people to go from being a 2/10 to a 6+ in looks.


I think the idea of looks and sex are two totally separate things. First of all, I would not sleep with someone that I did not find attractive. But let's say the guy is 2, and he meets another 2 in a woman, the two of them may have a great time sexually, even though they know their limitations of their physical appearance.

I am a shallow f vck. I've only dated women that are 8 or above. Why? Because I can get away with it. What I found was that most 10s that I met were horrible in bed. JUST HORRIBLE!!!!! Why? Because there were this prima dona's that just sat there and expected the man to do everything. Quite annoying. Now, don't get me wrong. I've had a couple of girlfriends that were at least 9.5s that were absolutely crazy in bed, but how they looked was not necessarily what defined how good in bed they were.
 Dawn0813
Joined: 4/2/2015
Msg: 113
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/29/2015 10:03:46 AM
I can go as long as I want without sex, and men who pressure me into sex, or that is all they are interested in no matter how hot they are, it is a huge turn off. I mean yeah, if I met a hot guy and he also wanted a relationship and it was not just a sex based relationship, that would be different depending on the circumstances. I have had texts from guys I didn't even meet yet, non stop talking about sex, and sending me****picks when I barely know their names!! Come on guys, if that works for some men, good luck!! Most women unless they have really low self esteem, no confidence and are just desperate, that approach is not gonna work. If I meet a great guy, and it feels right then that's great, but I definitely am not interested in any little boys who are so immature that sex is all they are interested in. I actually saw on one guy that messaged me, his profile quote was DTF!!! Down to F***!! Are you serious! To me that sound like a walking STD, and an immature child. Not interested.
 whitetigermtm79
Joined: 4/15/2015
Msg: 114
view profile
History
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 4/29/2015 10:19:10 PM
It all comes down to communication in my opinion. People who might not have as much experience might believe they are doing good. Maybe they can't read their partner's body language. That's why its aways good to express what you want and learn each other so there is no bad sex
 GattoMonstrosis
Joined: 4/4/2013
Msg: 115
view profile
History
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 5/4/2015 4:29:22 AM
If it is all about the sex and the sex is no good then what on earth would keep you coming back for more?
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 116
view profile
History
Bad sex vs no sex
Posted: 5/4/2015 8:49:29 AM


Ya can't teach many people to go from being a 2/10 to a 6+ in looks.


I think the idea of looks and sex are two totally separate things. First of all, I would not sleep with someone that I did not find attractive. But let's say the guy is 2, and he meets another 2 in a woman, the two of them may have a great time sexually, even though they know their limitations of their physical appearance.

The problem with rating scales is that it's not a universal form of measurement. It's an individual thing, and each person would have a different scale of measurement.

It's also why I stopped relying on purely looks to pick a partner. Ok, if I'm ONLY after sex, then my attraction to them is more physical. Thing is, straight up sex only relationships get boring quickly for me. I want something of more substance. Someone might not ring all my bells when we first meet, however, over time getting to know them and how their mind works, I often find my attraction to them growing.
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Bad sex vs no sex