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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....      Home login  
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 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 226
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....Page 10 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
Thoughts on a chaperone.


That's an old tradition that isn't really followed that much these days in places like BKK, Phuket, Chiang Mai or any other bigger city. But it depends on her age and whether she still lives at home or even in her village, town, etc. My wife never brought a chaperone on our first date but then again she was about 29 or 30 when we first met. I didn't even get any pressure to meet her parents until we'd been together for about 6 months or so and I think it was because we decided to live together.


https://talk.xpat.life/25911-do-thai-women-always-have-a-chaperone-on-a-first-date/

So it depends, and over 30 is getting to be an old maid in Thailand.

But Thai women date more seriously than American women. Average Thai women (good girls) date mainly to get married, if you have sex then you will find it very difficult to end the relationship. There are numerous stories of men secretly moving to a new location to get out of a relationship.

Then again, most farang (Western tourist) seldom get out of the tourist areas, many of the men end up dating bar girls who are really prostitutes. Though they do seem more like a real GF than a hooker in the USA, and even most bar girls would like to get married. For sure a bar girl doesn't want to lose her source of financial support.

You really have to be there for some time and stay out of tourist areas to see how life is really like.


Well that's no fun if the women are more available. Talk about a stipulation! How do you have sex with them on the standard 3rd-4th date? Their family (or friend) chaperone going to watch? Or maybe 3-some?? ;)


If all you are looking for is sex, then that is mind blowingly easy in a tourst area in Thailand. It's actually a little hard to avoid.
 motowncowgirl
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 227
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 8:04:45 AM

If all you are looking for is sex, then that is mind blowingly easy in a tourst area in Thailand. It's actually a little hard to avoid.

do single female tourists in Thailand have equal opportunity?
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 228
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 8:39:06 AM

do single female tourists in Thailand have equal opportunity?


Not really, and you would have to date Thai men. Or were you just interested in random sex? But I think it's fairly easy to date Thai men. However, trying to date a Western man in Thailand is like trying to sell snow cones to Eskimos.

BUT a single female friend of mine who has a business where she gets merchandise produced in Thailand asked an older friend to recommend an employee that would also make a suitable BF. The older friend has a large business employing many people.

She told me that BF was an option and a good employee was more important. I have traveled with them as a couple, I have many pictures if you are curious. She was 37 and he was 27, she is also a little obese and he was very thin.

They have been married now for about 2 years, they live in Thailand and have both visited her parents in Kentucky.
 motowncowgirl
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 229
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 9:02:05 AM
LOL no, I am not interested in random sex, I just wondered about the gender differences in Thailand when it comes to getting it.

I would have been very surprised if you said western women were flocking to Thailand to date Thai men because they're just so incredibly available.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 230
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 10:13:55 AM

I would have been very surprised if you said western women were flocking to Thailand to date Thai men because they're just so incredibly available.


Two of the complains I have heard from Western women is that Thai men aren't very masculine and the majority of them think having a minor wife is acceptable and common. This isn't the situation with my lady friend and her Thai husband, but then again they have only been married 2 years.

I found it a little culurally weird to visit my brother-in-laws house along with my wife, mother-in-law and sister-in-law where he lives with his wife. Then we all go to his GFs house where he has another woman with whom he as a 2 year old son with and he has built her a small house to live in. When he was leaving the GF's with the child house, he was stopping at another GF's house where he seems to have a serious love interest. He said he might come over to the parents house with his second GF, but he never showed. My wife told me he wasn't likely to show.

He asked his mother to tell his wife that he was going only going to visit her at her house. So they are all being deceptive, though probably his wife suspects something. As long as it isn't blatantly obvious and out in public, they tend to accept this. His wife is barren and cannot have children, which is a big deal to Thai couples. Meaning the wife can threaten to divorce and move away with the child, that seems to work at times.

BTW, my wife is actually 3/4 Chinese, she warns me she isn't anything much like a typical Thai woman. :)

Like I often stated, it's a good thing I don't speak Thai, it keeps me out of trouble.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 231
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History
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 10:58:19 AM

Well that's no fun if the women are more available. Talk about a stipulation! How do you have sex with them on the standard 3rd-4th date? Their family (or friend) chaperone going to watch? Or maybe 3-some?? ;)


I know what your thinking NG....institutionalized****locking!

Philippines is similar. Lot of US military have to put up with that! I think guys learn to have their date come alone after the 1st or 2nd date.

Imagine how RT would feel, he would go crazy having to pay for 2 gals on one date!:) Perhaps he would make them pay?
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 232
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 11:01:47 AM

Imagine how RT would feel, he would go crazy having to pay for 2 gals on one date!:) Perhaps he would make them pay?


But the upside is that a group of 8 people might run $60 tops, unless you went all high society.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 233
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 1:08:56 PM
It's been my experience in working with the elderly, that both sexes get "funny" the older they get. Routines and activities of daily living are set. Not many change those things the older they get, in fact they become set in stone. Making a change can upset them emotionally and scare them. They relive their younger years out in day dreams and memories of the good days. They regress.

Get ready....it happens to us all. No one gets out alive. Enjoy every day you have on the right side of the grass.
 newoldgirl
Joined: 4/16/2015
Msg: 234
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 4:05:25 PM

Women who become more outspoken as they age, just dont care anymore what people think and don't suppress their ideas and opinions the way they may have done, in their people pleasing days. They don't change, just become more authentically themselves.


Yes, I think this is true.

Also, depending on how many decades we have been alive, society is more open in general, in a variety of ways.
 Mummymania
Joined: 6/22/2015
Msg: 235
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 4:41:33 PM
So guys get more critical as they age. Women only get more authentic. The hypocrisy on this board is amusing.
 Whistle_Stop
Joined: 4/9/2015
Msg: 236
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 5:09:15 PM

So guys get more critical as they age. Women only get more authentic.

Correct!
Why it took 10 pages to say what you said in 1 sentence...is beyond me...sheesh!
 pepperstrand
Joined: 1/25/2015
Msg: 237
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/27/2015 8:47:38 AM
Good for you buying your own candy and having a kind spirit! I work with little old men that give me candy. Some are nice and some spike it for fun. So watch out for old men with candy! lol With Halloween coming up be Very CAreful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 238
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/27/2015 2:09:45 PM
Just saw message 245.

No matter how much women say "Hear me roar," they have made themselves less valuable. The reality is, and I deal in reality, that most men used to be happy to have a woman. Now they can discard them every six months for a new one because women are so easy now. Talk to your male cousin or brother one day over****ails. (drinks) They can be critical because if you don't like it, they can easily get another one, and everything, pretty early on, and discard you for what they consider a better model without much effort. Especially as they get older. And women tolerate it. Oh, after a while they claim not to be interested in men or a relationship rather than that they have accepted the turnstile or that they are tired of being discarded. Vicious circle.

Men and woman will say ,"Oh, that is so old fashioned or oppressive" but women had power. They no longer have any. (Men had power also, of a different type.)

OF COURSE women who fall into this category and men taking full advantage of it will encourage such behavior.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 239
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/27/2015 2:20:39 PM

that most men used to be happy to have a woman. Now they can discard them every six months for a new one because women are so easy now.


they can easily get another one,


Can someone please tell me where all of these "easy" women are to be found?
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 240
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/27/2015 2:41:58 PM

Can someone please tell me where all of these "easy" women are to be found?



I've been wondering the same every time this young lady decides to throw these kinda "facts" or should I say "statements" around like it was the truth.

Maybe it's a Philly thing?
 sealady111
Joined: 5/31/2015
Msg: 241
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/27/2015 3:24:15 PM

that most men used to be happy to have a woman. Now they can discard them every six months for a new one because women are so easy now.

they can easily get another one,



^^^ 6 months???

Really??

Here in the land of Oz a mature man who is solvent, confident, single, fit, healthy, intelligent with manageable baggage has his pick.
(Or gives the impression of the above.)
There seems to be multitudes of women of all ages willing to do anything for him.
I meet them regularly. Have dated a few and have others as friends and watch the rotating door of women.
6 months can be long term for some as they get run as soon as they think the women are getting serious.
And yes, many of the women are dating them because they want something serious.
Others get the women to fall in love then the women WILL do anything.


Now if he is ill, unemployed, destitute, illiterate, lacking in confidence etc
That is a totally different story.
 PassionateSunnyGal
Joined: 7/23/2015
Msg: 242
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/27/2015 8:52:48 PM

that most men used to be happy to have a woman. Now they can discard them every six months for a new one because women are so easy now.


So that is where the whole mindset is so wrong--sure there are men out there like that and sure there are women that allow that but because SOME allow it doesn't mean ALL allow it...and MOST importantly is the fact that not all men are like that.

I know a few years ago I ran into a group of men who pretty much had a revolving door on their bedroom, they were educated and successful and having gotten a divorce and feeling they "lost half of everything" to one woman they no longer felt they wanted the same type of relationship with women again...sure at first they will try and impress you with their worldly possessions, their homes, cars etc. In fact, most men who **** about women only wanting them for their money are the first to throw money at you. And as soon as a woman starts making demands for a more permanent type of relationship from dating ...they will kick her out and get another one...

But see those women are as wrong as those men--they are using sex as a way to try and get a man...and the men are using who they are and offering *security to get a woman...it's not about women being easy or stupid...it's about people not being true to themselves and trying to *game someone.

One guy explained the whole thing to me - we were friends having had the same type of cancer--and I would kid him about sleeping alone in a big cold bed most of the time to keep his money safe cause he was too afraid of trusting and loving another woman. Funny thing he met a girl and really liked her but once she figured out what he was doing...she bailed on him...ditched him cold and ended up breaking his heart and he told me he knew he had no one but himself to blame...she was perfect for him.

My point is even if someone might have this thought pattern going on -it doesn't make them immune to love, but people generally show you what they think your value to them is...you just have to be wise enough to see it.
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 243
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/28/2015 11:23:59 AM
Looks like you, sealady and I do not disagree.
 PassionateSunnyGal
Joined: 7/23/2015
Msg: 244
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/28/2015 11:40:42 AM
^^beautiful thing about life--opinions are like buttholes-everyone has one!
 browneyesboo
Joined: 8/14/2015
Msg: 245
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/28/2015 11:56:03 AM

No matter how much women say "Hear me roar," they have made themselves less valuable. The reality is, and I deal in reality, that most men used to be happy to have a woman. Now they can discard them every six months for a new one because women are so easy now. Talk to your male cousin or brother one day over****ails. (drinks) They can be critical because if you don't like it, they can easily get another one, and everything, pretty early on, and discard you for what they consider a better model without much effort. Especially as they get older. And women tolerate it. Oh, after a while they claim not to be interested in men or a relationship rather than that they have accepted the turnstile or that they are tired of being discarded. Vicious circle.


This seems to be a common theme of yours...woman have made themselves easy and less valuable.
The reality is, and I also deal in reality, it is possible to change so that men are not constantly discarding you.
I can understand your perception, as mine might be skewered as well if I was met with constant rejection.

Maybe surround yourself with more positive women with healthy attitudes towards men and sex and perhaps your
outlook may become more positive as well?

It's worth a try.
 halcyon_skies
Joined: 7/27/2015
Msg: 246
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/28/2015 12:15:41 PM

No matter how much women say "Hear me roar," they have made themselves less valuable. The reality is, and I deal in reality, that most men used to be happy to have a woman. Now they can discard them every six months for a new one because women are so easy now. Talk to your male cousin or brother one day over ****ails. (drinks) They can be critical because if you don't like it, they can easily get another one, and everything, pretty early on, and discard you for what they consider a better model without much effort. Especially as they get older. And women tolerate it. Oh, after a while they claim not to be interested in men or a relationship rather than that they have accepted the turnstile or that they are tired of being discarded. Vicious circle.


Hmm. I haven't noticed this phenomenon at all. It appears that many of the women in your social circle might have low self-esteem, or they have broken pickers and get involved with men who are players.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 247
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/28/2015 12:46:10 PM

They can be critical because if you don't like it, they can easily get another one, and everything, pretty early on, and discard you for what they consider a better model without much effort. Especially as they get older. And women tolerate it. Oh, after a while they claim not to be interested in men or a relationship rather than that they have accepted the turnstile or that they are tired of being discarded. Vicious circle.


With all the supposed "discarding" going on and the number of times it's stated above that it's done by men for a "better model" *rolls eyes*, one would think that the men must have started pretty damned low on their search pretty early on if they're still going after better and better models after soooooo much discarding.

Personally, I think it's a 50/50 proposition of men and women not setting a relationship in stone beyond six months as they get older. It takes that long to actually even begin to get to know one another. I'd feel more sorry for individuals who pretend the first person they get involved with has to be LTR material when they're not remotely compatible, strictly to say they are in a relationship (desperate/lonely). There are definitely opposite ends of the spectrum and it has nothing to do with men being more critical and judgmental the older they are. Older individuals have generally come to terms with what they want out of the rest of their lives and don't feel the need to conform to anyone else's ideas of how they should live it, whether that's a long term relationship, dating strictly for opposite sex companionship, or not actively seeking either because they're entirely happy and fulfilled in numerous other ways that aren't centered around the opposite sex.
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 248
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/28/2015 1:03:15 PM
Broweyes- your assumptions are so wrong and psych 101. Lol!

No. Loose women change the circumstances for the rest of us.

Both of your identities are saying the same thing. No matter. All quite wrong yet Quite amusing. It is why I post at POF. One will always find something amusing.
Thanks.

_---------+++++++++

Better is a matter of perception and opportunity.
 474bluemoon
Joined: 9/24/2015
Msg: 249
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/28/2015 4:30:23 PM
I'd like to know the definition of a "loose woman " because I don't want to be mistaken for one. So much chatter about the 3 date rule or holding out for a ring or whatever. I'd like to know what is considered "loose" and what is preferred. And does this apply to men as well?

"Both of your identities are saying the same thing." Do you think Browneyes and Halcyon are the he same person? Also, I think you helped prove a few on here who have said that they find women to be more critical and judgmental than men.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 250
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 9/28/2015 4:55:10 PM
I thought women of a certain age took Yoga/spin/swim classes to well, stay loose - so you don't sound like a breakfast cereal when you move.
Know what else I thought? That women of a certain age would support each other rather than attempt to tear them down with pissy lil digs. when I worked in a care house for the elderly some of the old women would hid their roommates dentures. I get to one, I'll smother that bytch before I let her get my teeth :)
Boo and HS are definitely different posters..
kinda like you Dee :P
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