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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....      Home login  
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 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 101
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....Page 5 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
Meh...last time I checked criticizing anybody for being critical and judgmental seems oxymoron-ish.....lol


Holy crow....

Yup...somehow wasn't quite 'feeling the love'....



Soon, it will be wine thirty



Wine o'clock, did someone say it was wine o'clock ?? I'm in.


Maybe the OP was confused what with all the talk of "wine-ing"????

Anyway...HAPPY WINE DAY, EVERYBODY!!!!! LOL

Umm...still waiting on that shipment there Cloon....red though...not white...You have some LOVELY wines out your way....;-)
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 102
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 3:49:44 AM
Maybe there should be a bit more READING instead of READING INTO and INTERPRETING.

I don't believe that there is any statement that ALL of anything does or is anything.

It often seems that this is a closed shop and people want to keep it that.

The venom that blonde received sort of response proves her point.

Literate Hiker - Great, great, great. Great life, great life.

And that fellow with the glasses- I don't understand why blonde's post drew such fire from you.

One can say, "That hasn't been my experience. I find men quite charming as they age" as a few people diddid.

Or one can be really American-like and say

"You are terrible person. No wonder you draw that type to you. I am charming and only get charming kind men to contact and talk , You must be an idiot and a shrew to get that kind of attention. You are a VICTIM VICTIM VICTIM, SHREW SHREW SHREW. BITTER BITTER BITTER"

By the way, what is the female version of mangina? Penale?
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 103
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 3:53:40 AM

Nobody should have to prove anything, to anyone.

Your mother was 22 when she got married. You are 57.

You don't sound very loving and wonderful, IMHO. Why don't YOU start sending messages?

Spreading love? My ass. I'm not feeling the love here babe.

Smells like an 18 year old eating cheese puffs and bored during Spring Break.


Does sound like what she meant and proves me wrong about men in relationship??


"""I don't feel that it is necessary to prove anything.
Your mother was 22 when she got married. You are 57.
Perhaps YOU should try sending messages?
Spreading love? How does your post do that? ?""
 Peppermint_Petunias
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 104
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 4:15:02 AM

“Women just want bad boys and criminals, guys who treat them like crap, not nice guys like me. PROVE ME WRONG.

Funny, you don't sound "nice" or fun at all.
 motowncowgirl
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 105
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 5:00:54 AM

Girls, I did my best for you trying to get men to be more loving, affectionate, attentive, kind, understanding, empathetic and giving of their hearts.

sorry, if I had known you were coming here to SAVE US, i could have nailed you to a cross a little sooner.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 106
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 5:17:01 AM
^^^ LOL
Don't make me laugh I'm perfecting my resting bytch face
Deestrate - I disagree with your assessment. Blonde C came in to stir the pot and put down Men - she got as good as she gave. This isn't a "closed shop" imo. Here, have a bacon sandwich :)
 smilebrother
Joined: 5/4/2010
Msg: 107
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 5:48:50 AM
It's hard NOT to get critical and judgmental as you get older. I have to fight against it every day. I have a friend who's gotten so negative and so grumpy that it's no longer fun to be around him. Anyone (except literate hiker?? ha ha) who has gotten to this age has had many bad things happen:

-deaths of loved ones
-cheating partners
-random acts of disrespect by strangers
-purposeful acts of disrespect by people who supposedly loved you
-disappointments in careers and relationships
-prejudice working against you
-declining health and abilities
-and the list goes on...

These things build up over time and corrode the spirit. I think the worst thing is the loss of trust in authority and the basic fairness of life. When I was young I was a good boy who believed that working hard and always doing the right thing were the ways to get ahead in life; then I learned that a lot of people get where they are by lying, cheating, stealing... or just through random chance, or knowing the right person, or being in the right place at the right time. And then those people are the ones who tell you they did it all by themselves with no help: "You just have to work hard and always do the right thing!"

Serenity now!!

The only thing that helps is learning how to take some control over your own life by figuring out what's important to you, and focusing your energy on those things. Spreading a little love and compassion around can also help.
 stormy2728weather
Joined: 4/3/2015
Msg: 108
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 7:46:16 AM
I, for one, said I hadn't come across any critical or judgmental men. I did mention the gender generalization made by the OP and a few more as there are some cranky women out there as well.

I find it odd that Deeristate wants to defend the OP when generally she herself is bashing men throughout the forums. And yes, I did comprehend what the OP wrote but I'm sure she lost a few fans at the use of the term "throwaways". She herself is a throwaway. The OP also doesn't have the "balls" to hang in there and took the little girl easy way out and deleted and ran. No substance, no character....just bytch and run.

"Closed shop", Nope . Just folks agreeing and disagreeing and the poor sports running away.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 109
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 8:22:40 AM
@smilebrother...Excellent post....lots of really good points there....gave me some stuff to think about...thanks!!!
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 110
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 10:23:51 AM
Smilebrother - or you can be the sum of all the GOOD things that have happened in your Life.
What you state is imo just an excuse to be a poor me party of one
 VolkanoKing
Joined: 8/1/2014
Msg: 111
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 11:08:43 AM
Message 113 by SmileBrother is officially the greatest post I have read here, ever.


Excellent points and so, so true.

And timely. yesterday there was an article about a photoshoot a woman did of her preteen daughters...very artsy, well shot stuff...of them running around playing, having fun and her main message "being strong".....I saw the "little girl confidence" they had in the photos..as they laughed and played and raced and ran...nothing was going to stop those kids.

I used to be a little girl like that! And as I looked at the photos I thought to myself...why doesnt this last? Why do we become burdened, changed, different when we get older? Why do many confident little ladies like this start questioning themselves, becoming super sensitive, worried, and worst of all...filled with self loathing?

Part of it is hormonal..once you hit the teens your brain changes. I know at the age of 13 it hit me full force. A new state of mind hit me that I had never experienced before:

Cynicism.

But alot of the rest that can wear you down/change you:...really nicely summed up in that post.

Of course, we can all still be those little kids to a degree. We still can feel joy, complete "who gives a hoot" uninhibited happiness, excited about new things, and most of all..*creative*.

But with the years come the compounded injustices, disappointments, and yes, so so true about how the "real world works".

So in a way I can't blame men I meet for having more walls then bridges. I get it. Some of us area aware of it, some aren't. Some want to fire off shots from behind the barricades, some can slowly drop down the drawbridge.

Maybe all of us will find the rare kingdom open and ready to be explored, and be one ourselves.

 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 112
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 11:45:39 AM

Serenity now!!


Insanity later.


Maybe all of us will find the rare kingdom open and ready to be explored,


I'm partial to Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom myself.


By the way, what is the female version of mangina?


Rosie O'Donnell.
 clooneystutor
Joined: 3/8/2015
Msg: 113
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 12:47:02 PM
Good stuff here.

Mom says fairy tales don't exist, and pressing the reset button gets old.

She's content and smugly watching younger folk chasing fairy tales that end up in mud patches.

I told her if she looked like Christie Brinkley, she'd be out there doing mud runs herself :)
 StarClassic
Joined: 9/29/2014
Msg: 114
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 1:42:41 PM

I told her if she looked like Christie Brinkley, she'd be out there doing mud runs herself :)


What's CB boobs and buns got to do with it? jk
My mother was manic depressive (bipolar for the PC crowd). Most days mom was on cloud nine searching for that randy Scotsman of her dreams, at 82.
If your mother is of sound mind and body, she ought to be out playing in the mud.
 clooneystutor
Joined: 3/8/2015
Msg: 115
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 2:05:20 PM
^^^
Love your mom's attitude!
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 116
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 2:12:27 PM
Wow, another good post VK...

I know exactly what you're talking about...for me I believe it was the loss of my innocence, and, unfortunately happened when I was very young....

It's also as smile...said....The cumulative effect of Life....Some people just handle disillusionment better than others...

As forum and you both mentioned, having that ability to tap into that childlike part of myself is vital for living with any degree of joy....and it really IS the source for creativity and compassion and all of that good stuff...imo

I know for me personally, it's largely a result of plain old burnout, as that is where I'm at, but I'm taking steps now to try and deal with that as best I can...

It really sucks that once, not too long ago, walking through the forest and smelling that rich, earthy smell...sunlight filtering through thick foliage overhead, soft stirrings in the underbrush marking the passage of hidden creatures scurrying to safety, the sounds of water falling softly into a forest pool...was enough to make me feel renewed and as though there were still some things right with the world ....

When that stopped for me, I knew I was 'in trouble' but Life kept demanding my attention and the majority of Life these days is a LONG list of 'have to's', as opposed to 'want to's'....Time to reawaken that childlike sense of wonder and to refocus my energy not so much towards some Pollyanna-ish bid at 'positivity', but towards that sense of wonder and awe that lives within us all....We just have to work harder sometimes than others to remember that....

And VK...I can SO see you as a little girl...you were probably ADORABLE, and she;s still there in that mischievous little smile of yours....lol ;-)


If your mother is of sound mind and body, she ought to be out playing in the mud.


That's the kind of 82 yr old that I want to be!!! lol Mudpies for ALL!!!
 justdeb1111
Joined: 8/12/2012
Msg: 117
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 2:37:39 PM

Smilebrother - or you can be the sum of all the GOOD things that have happened in your Life.
What you state is imo just an excuse to be a poor me party of one

Oh smackdown score one, sister Ouija! Classic half a glass of water and how someone views it. Looking back I suppose I've had some rough times as well, but I have to really think hard to remember them. Good memories, though, are effortless to recall and bring a smile (and sometimes a daydream).
I can only hope to be chasing randy Scotsmen when I am 82...
 StarClassic
Joined: 9/29/2014
Msg: 118
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 2:52:00 PM
^^^ You've struck at the problem I'm having with OLD piano.
I couldn't begin to count the number of profiles I've read through, and only one stands out. A rather sparse profile with little personal info, but she strikes me as a woman with depth. A strong sense of self, if you will. All others want fun fun fun, don't be this, don't be that. All this lady asks is that you recognize her strength and even take advantage of it it seems.
Why, can't I find someone like that without being involved in a long distant relationship?
 VolkanoKing
Joined: 8/1/2014
Msg: 119
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 3:21:12 PM
I was a very very busy, active, imaginative kid. Always making stuff, puppets, forts, pathways, "mini Disneylands" and stuff.

My favorite toy was my cassette player. LOVED IT. Used to make "radio shows" and record TV shows.

The best part was that I wasn't ever worried or thinking about "what other people thought."

It wasn't until about the age of 10 or so when the very first traces of that started to leak in..when I found out a girl at school "didn't like me."

It wasn't much, not at first. But up until then, there were never any people "not liking me." What did it mean?


Then at thirteen the whole thing hit like a tidal wave..coming from elementary school into jr. high was like entering another world. Popular kids. Clicks. Bullies. And within myself...little crushes I used to have in 6th grade were suddenly of MAJOR IMPORTANCE and had to be talked about constantly with my friends.

Without any effort on my part, the focus I had put on my imaginative "nature conservation gardens" and "gold mines" I had made in the backyard faded away and was replaced with endless thoughts of boys, clothes we were all supposed to wear, how your hair is supposed to look, and of course, the incredible drag of realizing I had to BUY A BRA!!!! UGH!

Childhood was so over.

But by far the worst was the hierarchy of high school that you could not escape..the dynamics of life were just completely changed, and so fast. Girls pinpointed me and wanted to beat me up, so there was now "risk" going to school and trying to walk home without being followed and smacked in the face, tripped and shoved. Other girls had boyfriends and parents with enough money to get their hair cut cool and the costly "french jeans" that were in style around 1980.

For some, the weariness of life starts early. The hostilities that seem to come from nowhere, realizing that popularity is not based on how "nice" you are..all the stuff that segueways into adulthood and sticks.

Anyway, art is my life and livelihood, I make a living off my creativity and imagination, but I'm still a grown up with all the complexities and needs of one.

I think every day about that little girl who rode alongside her father in his convertible Corviar, hair flying in the wind, full and complete with the value that was instilled in her the day she was born.

You can't go home. You have to make a new one.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 120
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 3:29:16 PM
And worse if he is unhappy in his life.....no money (first, second, third, or fourth wife took it all), no career (it's in the toilet and about to be flushed), sexual problems (ED), lost his good looks (huge belly, generally unattractive).
 StarClassic
Joined: 9/29/2014
Msg: 121
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 3:44:41 PM
VK, I wish we lived closer. Just to sit down over a cuppa' joe and compare notes. I went through the same sh!t in high school. One of the "have nots" amongst the silver spoon punks.
There are several forumites here I respect, but with every word you most of all. You're not drastic "in your face blunt" nor "touchy feely" about matters. You have that raw human element that say you stand on your own two feet and FTW.
 Literate_Hiker
Joined: 1/1/2015
Msg: 122
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 5:10:11 PM
I have always been a positive, high energy, ebullient person. As an optimist, I see the good in people. I experience joy and find humor every day.

Yes, I have had painful experiences (rape, sexual abuse and betrayal, to name a few). That's part of life. If I feel hurt, I try to learn from the experience and let the bad feelings go. I refuse to let a few bad men destroy my opinion of half of the human race.

"Dr. Hilary Tindle, a physician and clinical investigator at Vanderbilt University, has produced a body of work on the connection between attitude and health, and all of it points to the improbable power of just being hopeful. In one massive 2009 study, Tindle analyzed data from 97,253 women who had filled out questionnaire for the National Institutes of Health's Women's Health Initiative, trying to correlate hopefulness and mortality.

"Women who had scored high on optimism- being hopeful about the future- the results showed, had significantly lower rates of heart disease, cancer and mortality than women who scored high on pessimism.

"Tindle also studied cynicism, which can be described as feelings of pessimism about other people, expecting them to be untrustworthy and even harmful. Women with lower cynicism, compared with those who viewed most other people with suspicion, had lower risk of death.

"In a 2012 study, Tindle compared more than 430 people who had undergone coronary-bypass surgery - 284 of whom were diagnosed with at least low-level clinical depression and 146 of whom were not. Within eight months after surgery, the depressed pessimists had more than twice the complication and rehospitalization rate than the optimistic group. ("From: "Get Your Head in the Game" by Jeffrey Kluger, Time Magazine, Februrary 23-March 2, 2015.)

Finally, this 10-minute TED Talk by Brene' Brown contains beautiful, important messages about human connection and vulnerability.

http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html
 JoeBnD
Joined: 3/23/2012
Msg: 123
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 6:37:45 PM
(This is a little late due to watching The Masters all day)


But alot of the rest that can wear you down/change you:...really nicely summed up in that post.


But, but, but...... according to so many of the women here, nice guys who lash out after getting fed up have been evil b@stards since birth. Oh wait, they must be the exception to being influenced by life's crap. Hmmm.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 124
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 6:59:30 PM
Joe, today I'm critical of Phil's short game. Not typical of his finesse around the greens. Spieth's got a good lead but Rose is a clutch putter when the match is on the line.

Unless you've been there tv doesn't do justice to the severity of slope on those greens.

Prediction...Speith shoots one or two over par, Rose fires a 66 or 67, Phil shoots a 68 but it's not enough to catch Speith.

BOT....judgemental....hmm...like when someone pulls out right in front of me and then goes fifteen under the speed limit and when I look in the rearview there's not a car for miles kind of judgemental? :)
 JoeBnD
Joined: 3/23/2012
Msg: 125
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 4/11/2015 7:27:12 PM
That is a pretty decent golf assessment/prediction; Spieth showed a bit of vulnerability with the bogies and the double-bogie, and Rose came on big. But I am still going to root for Phil like crazy; he needs a fourth green jacket. Still, I will be happy if the level of play is the same tomorrow. The Masters is almost always the best tournament of the year in my opinion.

BTW, I have played the course on Xbox, so I am well aware of the severe undulations in the greens. Having virtually played the course, I have a better appreciation for it. At lunch on Friday, my buddy said to me "I have to find us a way to play that (actual) course." We looked at each other and broke out laughing. Isn't the waiting list for membership (which is a list of well to do folks) something like 20 years long? I told him that I didn't think we could pass for 15 year-olds in the drive, chip, and putt (sir, I have that rare disease that makes me age faster).
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